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00:02:16
Hello and welcome to Rewind with Karen in Georgia. It is Wednesday, as I like to call it, Rewind's Day.
00:02:24
I love that. And this is a show where we recap our old episodes with all new commentary, updates, and insights.
00:02:30
Today we're recapping episode 42. It's a tough one. We named it Abject Failure. You'll see. You'll understand why once you start listening. It's very accurate for the time.
00:02:40
This episode came out on November 10th, so like five days after the worst thing of all time in 2016.
00:02:46
The vibes are bad. We are just trying to hold on, trying to help other people hold on.
00:02:51
We do our best. Let's take a moment and emotionally prepare to listen to the intro of episode 42.
00:03:02
Are you going to belch? This belch is brought to you by Chipotle. Chipotle. When life is empty and you need beans.
00:03:16
When your heart is empty and you need to fill your gut. Go to Chipotle. This isn't an ad.
00:03:23
And fart it out. I know. They're like, these ads are getting so casual. Oh, no. I just feel a little broken today.
00:03:31
Uh-huh. Why? Oh, didn't I tell you? No, no. I've been away. I was in New Zealand.
00:03:38
The world's crashing down around our heads. Oh, I didn't realize. Oh, yeah. It's true.
00:03:42
Well. This is the day after, you guys. which is one of the great nuclear war scare films
00:03:50
from the 80s. If you haven't seen it and you want a different kind of scare entertainment,
00:03:55
The Day After is one of the most upsetting things. I was left alone to watch when I was 11 years old.
00:04:01
I feel like that is the exact opposite of what I need to be watching right now considering the circumstances.
00:04:07
Do not watch it. Which is that not only did Hillary lose, Trump won the presidency.
00:04:15
I'm scared for our country. Jill Stein didn't come in as that third party candidate to tear it away.
00:04:19
Not only. I would have been fine. It would have been fine. Yeah. You know, what's funny is there is a...
00:04:29
Nothing at all. So let's get this done. We just start fighting. What's funny? That it seems like, first of all, it's 100 degrees in Los Angeles today.
00:04:41
so there's a hellscape feel to all of life right now that's very surreal and it's really quiet
00:04:47
it doesn't i mean like because this is california it's very quiet people are like i feel like people
00:04:53
are looking inside themselves people are devastated and i just want to like hold everyone's hand that
00:05:00
i see not that i left the house much today but when i did it was like i wanted to apologize to
00:05:07
everyone who is going to be fucked, you know? Yeah. Including us. I mean, in all different ways.
00:05:15
But here's what I was trying to do. This is what I did, which I never do. I was just letting
00:05:20
everybody merge in front of me today. Anybody that came anywhere near me with a blanker on,
00:05:25
I was like, go ahead. I had my arm out the window. Go ahead, everybody. Go. Maybe we'll all be friends now. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I was so cocky yesterday. You know what I mean? Yeah. The conversation I had with the dude I ordered lunch from was so like, he was like, I'm scared. I'm like, we're going to be fine. Yeah. We got this jokey joke. Yeah. And I want to go back there and be like, I'm sorry. I took your fucking worry not seriously.
00:05:52
But that's what... It wasn that you weren taking it seriously That what everybody was doing I mean I feel like that what everyone down to political polar pundits were doing Yeah The faces on Anne Maddow Maddox when she kind of realized what was going on was when
00:06:11
I was like, goodbye, go into the wine bar. Yeah. What bothers me, like, okay, so, and sorry, this is becoming a political podcast.
00:06:18
Like, this is just so new and we need to, I'm just like, I don't know how we're going
00:06:21
to do this. But like it's it's when Bush won, I was like, oh, well, everyone's going to see what a mistake that was because it's going to affect them.
00:06:30
But the people that this is going to affect aren't the people who voted for him.
00:06:33
It's the people who aren't our minorities. It's not going to affect anyone who voted for him.
00:06:40
And also what's weird is there were some minorities that voted for him. I mean, there's there is a.
00:06:46
It was a con. It's a long con. And, you know, who knows? Who knows? As Hillary said, we have to give him a chance and see what happens.
00:06:54
Who knows? But if you're stoked, if you're stoked today, you know, we envy that position that you think
00:07:03
that you have solved a problem by putting Donald Trump into the presidency. It must feel great.
00:07:09
Yeah. I personally was so thrilled at the idea of a woman becoming president. Me too.
00:07:15
It was so exciting. Enjoy your naivety. And what's been great, though, is that like for all the posts I put up and on on the My Favorite Murder boards and stuff, not a single person has responded and been like, fuck you.
00:07:29
You know, like I think everyone who follows us for My Favorite Murder reasons. No.
00:07:34
No. No. You saw this shit. Yes. Oh. Come to Twitter. Really? Come to the bus stop that is Twitter and see what people are really saying.
00:07:46
I mean, it's a nice idea, but no. Okay. Which is why I don't think we should talk about politics, because that's basically just telling people don't be interested in this.
00:07:54
Okay, let's start then. Unless you don't want to start. No, let's start the podcast.
00:08:01
Any, anything, any housekeeping? Do you have no housekeeping? I thought I probably did yesterday.
00:08:08
I guess I can talk about the thing I loved, which I saw on the Facebook page, which was there was a Murderino meetup in Colorado.
00:08:18
That was so awesome. Like I kept looking at the picture this morning. It really gave me a lot of good feeling this morning.
00:08:26
I went straight to that Facebook page like the second I woke up and just looked at all these people communicating with each other.
00:08:32
And the thing that they wrote about, about this meetup of all these people talking about this thing that they're interested in,
00:08:39
but then also talking about getting a self-defense class started. they were just and they like all look like they're just kind of hanging with friends they all looked
00:08:50
they look like people who all went to high school together like they already looked like a group of
00:08:54
people yeah and that's I find that incredibly touching that people to me at the end of the
00:08:59
day that's what it's all about it's like people are actually connecting with the other human beings
00:09:03
totally I'm so happy for them yeah did I tell you speaking of making friends oh I have to tell you
00:09:08
about my acupuncturist and how I went I've been seeing her for like a few a couple of months now
00:09:14
for the sciatica issue. And she's been really fucking helping me. And she's this wonderful,
00:09:19
like soft-spoken, sweet person. She reminds me of like a kindergarten teacher. Wait, is it?
00:09:26
Where is it? It's in Silver Lake. Oh, at the Dow. It's not at the Dow of... No. Okay.
00:09:32
Shout out to Holly. I came in to get my acupuncture this week, last week, and she was like,
00:09:39
so one of my clients knows I'm into true crime and said to me, you need to listen to this podcast.
00:09:44
and she's like, I listened to three episodes of it before. I was like, I wonder who these girls are.
00:09:49
And then she's like, and then I looked at it and it was you. Like she didn't even know it was me while she was listening.
00:09:53
But she's like, I like it a lot. And then of course told me her hometown murder.
00:09:58
Where is she from? Which was fucking awesome. San Diego. And about like a girl who got killed from high school
00:10:05
and her mom got killed. And it turned out that they were into dealing drugs and shit.
00:10:11
And the cops initially thought that it was like, the serial killer that was going around at the time.
00:10:16
And they're like, it doesn't fit the MO, but maybe it is. And then they found out that they were dealing drugs.
00:10:20
Wow. I know. Wait, that just reminded me. I had a similar experience at the rap party for my job.
00:10:27
Oh. I'm not going to be able to remember her name now. It might be Cassie. It might be something with an O.
00:10:35
But anyway. Casio. It's Casio. I met a Casio keyboard from the 80s. and I put it on Bossa Nova
00:10:42
and danced by myself at a rap party. Just yelling murderino. And it was basically,
00:10:47
oh, I get to get the murderino. Karen, stop it. You're sober. Karen, this is why this is a rap party.
00:10:54
It's because we all wanted to... It's actually still going on. We were just trying to convince you that it's over.
00:10:58
We were trying to rap you personally out of this job. We're trying to be nice, so we're making it hard.
00:11:03
I wouldn't be surprised. but anyway she worked she works I can't remember where she works somehow on the show
00:11:15
her name is something and she works her name is something she means the world to me
00:11:19
she works somewhere and she's blonde she was so sweet she works for the show somehow but like in a like for the
00:11:29
network or for publicity or something where it's not in our office or whatever So it's okay that you didn't work with her for four months and then not know her.
00:11:36
Never seen her, never met her. Also, there's a chance she doesn't work on the show.
00:11:39
It was her roommate that works on the show now that I'm thinking about it. But end of the day, the fun part is she listened to the podcast and wanted to know what show I was working on when I would talk about it.
00:11:53
And then she goes and then I saw you here Now I know what show you been working on It was very fun and exciting I just remembered now that this fog of depression is lifting over me a little bit
00:12:05
because I'm laughing for the first time since yesterday. It's key. It's crucial.
00:12:09
It really is. So one, the Americana in Glendale. I go into Madewell who makes great jeans, great expensive jeans.
00:12:20
This is like my first time in my life not buying $10 jeans. and I get a pair. I buy a,
00:12:25
I go to, I go to put one on. I go to grab a pair and then of course the ones that are on top
00:12:30
fall to the ground as they do. Sure. Right as this like sweet girl comes up to me
00:12:35
to like, can I help? And I thought, I was like, I'm so sorry. I was like, I'm sorry I'm making a mess.
00:12:40
And she's like, I'm scared because these jeans are expensive. Right. And I just toppled a bunch of them.
00:12:43
She's like, are you Georgia? And I was like, yes. And she's like, we listened to,
00:12:48
we heard that the J. Crew shout out that you had done and like we do that too. No.
00:12:53
Yes. They were so sweet. We've spread to the Americana. So the Americana made well, ladies.
00:12:58
What's up? Shout out. Hi girls and guys. And then yesterday, I think I just met girls.
00:13:03
So it's... Okay. Yesterday, I went to this French restaurant in Echo Park to try to watch the end of the world.
00:13:12
And it was too crowded for me. But as I walk in, this table like hi at me and I just hide back
00:13:18
because I don't ever recognize anyone, you know, and they're like murdering. And I was like, oh, good.
00:13:21
I don't know. And they were just random fucking. Wow. Jesus. So that's three. Yeah.
00:13:27
And then as I left immediately, because it was too crowded, I made the mime of I'm going
00:13:31
to go slit my wrist somewhere else at them. And then I did. A real fun face. I'm going to go ahead and go down the street where it's quiet.
00:13:42
Well, I like that. I feel like this part of the podcast might, to an outsider, seem self-indulgent.
00:13:56
But as we have had to answer in even that, what I'm trying to say is that this is very new to us.
00:14:05
And so when these things happen, it's still hilarious and fun for us. It's exciting for us.
00:14:10
It's so exciting and it's its own, you know, it's like greetings corner or whatever.
00:14:16
It's like meeting friends you didn't know you had. And it's so exciting just to be like, to meet these like cool people who are, no one's been crazy to me yet.
00:14:24
There are very few crazy ones. And then when it stretches out to like my fucking acupuncturist, who by all accounts is like a nice, normal human being.
00:14:32
And she's like, I like it. What are the chances? She's supposed to be like mind-body and then she's like mind-body murder.
00:14:37
Totally is. Yeah. I mean, what we're saying is there's fucking nice people everywhere and it's nice to know and it's nice to remind each other.
00:14:44
And keep saying hi and we'll try to do the same and maybe remember your name or where you worked.
00:14:51
She was the nicest person. She seems nice. The one I can't remember. Cassie. Callie.
00:14:57
She looked like she was from the Midwest. She was so happy. Cassie-o. I feel like, you know, let's talk about something else.
00:15:05
Let's just not. Let's talk about another. our minds off an awful life. Here's a transitional
00:15:11
awful topic. The woman who was found chained like a dog inside the metal container
00:15:17
in North Carolina. They have found four bodies on the property. Four bodies buried.
00:15:25
So far. That fucking Amazon shit. Oh yes. So many people sent me that. Did you look at it? Yes.
00:15:32
I didn't look at it. So this guy who's like by all accounts a serial killer who already had a record for child molestation.
00:15:40
Rape at gunpoint. Rape at gunpoint. Somehow that's just, again, let's just make everything awful.
00:15:46
He has been commenting on the tools he's used to kill people and chain them up on Amazon,
00:15:55
reviewing them and saying shit like, I haven't killed anyone with this yet, but when I do, this will be a great tool.
00:16:03
like straight up admitting like this, this chain, this padlock is great for chaining people. Like,
00:16:11
dude, I think it's still up there too. I think the cops are looking into it. So they haven't
00:16:15
taken them down yet. Maybe that's, I feel like that's second only to my favorite internet comments,
00:16:22
which are on those sugar-free gummy bears. Oh my God. Which is now let's just turn this around
00:16:27
here. Here's, we're going to, we're going to just, we're mining for positivity today.
00:16:32
Should I find a couple? Yeah. Yes, if you want to. And I'll just... I'm sure everybody knows this.
00:16:39
It's kind of legendary. But if you don't... I don't think a lot of people know this.
00:16:43
So this gummy bear company made their own version of sugar-free gummy bears. And they were for sale on Amazon.
00:16:50
And the reviews for these sugar-free gummy bears that contain some chemical... It's called sugar alcohol.
00:16:59
Okay. So sugar alcohol apparently makes you shit your pants. It does. So there are reviews where people were like,
00:17:06
oh my God, I was shitting all day. Like people just talking about these gummy bears
00:17:12
just wreaking havoc on their intestinal system. And they just get more ridiculous and poetic as they go.
00:17:18
People are really like being... There's a lot. There's a few different places of like products
00:17:25
that people will pick up on and cover. Like there's like a single Bic pen. and it's just like people are talking about like time travel
00:17:33
and what the Big Pen has done for them. This makes me happy. It's kind of gross.
00:17:41
Do it. I mean, well, here's one. Be sure to also buy a tub of OxyClean with this
00:17:44
to get the blood and diarrhea stains out of your underwear, clothes, furniture, pets,
00:17:49
loved ones, ceiling fans. Let's see. Oh my God. Everything previously written is true It all true Don eat more than 15 in a sitting unless you were trying to power wash your intestines The cramping started about an hour later
00:18:06
and soon enough I was as bloated as a balloon in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
00:18:12
When the rumbling started, I sprinted down the hallway and made it to the bathroom
00:18:15
just in time for the four horsemen of the apocalypse to stampede from my backside,
00:18:18
laying waste to my home septic system and my will to live. After three hours of a pelvis shaking gummy bear assault,
00:18:24
I was spongy and weak. Surprised that I had any bones left. I cursed out Haribo.
00:18:29
Haribo. Haribo. That's the goal. Yes. With a little strength I could muster. But here's the cool thing about them is that people, and it's in the reviews, people with
00:18:40
like really bad illnesses who get constipated. I think chemo makes you unable to shit.
00:18:48
You are now like recommending them. Take two, like post. No. Yes. Yes. Like it's relieving constipation.
00:18:56
I sat in, my friend Stephanie and I sat in her car one day and I just read them and we were both crying.
00:19:03
We were just crying laughing. There's a banana slicer. That's a good one too. If you ever get sad and bored tonight.
00:19:09
Banana slicer reviews? There's banana slicer reviews that are just hilarious. Nice.
00:19:15
What was I going to say? Yeah. Don't eat sugar alcohol. Be careful. It's in a lot of stuff and I've eaten it before and it makes you so bloated.
00:19:22
You're in so much pain. Wow, I've never even heard of that. Yeah, it'll say it's in a lot of stuff and you think, oh, it's just sugar because it says sugar alcohol.
00:19:30
It's fucking terrible. Wow. Yep. It's like a sugar substitute? Yeah. It's like a, I think it's an app, an extraction of sugar that they take and they're like, it's sugar free.
00:19:41
Oh, right. Yeah. Don't eat that. Just eat sugar. Guys, just use sugar ultimately at the end of the day, except for those of you who have quit sugar.
00:19:50
Karen. Name Karen. I'm so impressed with you. Thank you. As a sugar addict. Well, once it's out of your system, you don't crave it anymore.
00:19:59
That's the shocking part. But what if I still crave cake? Like I don't want sugar, but I want cake.
00:20:05
You know what I mean? It's like a different... You're making up what's going to happen to you?
00:20:09
Yeah. Is that what you're saying? Well, like I know you don't crave sugar. Like you're not like, I want something sweet, but I want cake.
00:20:15
It's a different thing. No, but it's like, I want a piece of cake. Yeah. Well, that's just an idea.
00:20:21
That's true. that may need to go psychological for not just yeah i mean i think all of it's kind of psychological
00:20:27
yeah uh should we just not talk about murder i don't know i feel like it's like yeah that sucks
00:20:35
we've touched upon it enough i mean we really have we've danced around it a lot let's have
00:20:43
this one be all about let's just read review funny reviews this whole episode i mean i wouldn't mind
00:20:48
it. We kind of could. Do you want to look at the banana slicer? Yes. Let me see if I can find any.
00:20:54
Do you want me to read you another? Yes. Okay. I have a good one, but it's also like,
00:20:59
is it better than what's happening right now? I want to read a good one. Okay. After a few hours, I had an extreme buildup of gas with no relief. All I could was lay down
00:21:13
and pray for a fart. That might sound funny, but when you've eaten something that is basically
00:21:18
turned you into the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka you're pleading with your life.
00:21:22
Violet Beauregard is her name. There's like, okay, I want to find the Bic Pen one. Let's see.
00:21:28
I just found Banana Slicer. And this is a BuzzFeed article so you can actually find it.
00:21:32
It's the article called Amazon reviews of this plastic banana slicer are just the best.
00:21:39
So here's the first one. For decades, I've been trying to come up with an ideal way to slice
00:21:46
a banana. Use a knife, they say. Well, my parole officer won't allow me to be on knives.
00:21:51
Shoot it with a gun. Background check. Hello. I had to resort to carefully attempt to slice those bananas with my bare hands.
00:21:59
99.9% of the time, I would just get so frustrated that I just end up squishing the fruit in my hands and throwing it against the wall in anger.
00:22:07
Then after a fit of banana-induced rage, my parole officer introduced me to this kitchen marvel and my life was changed.
00:22:14
What can I say about this 571B banana slicer that hasn't already been said about the wheel, penicillin, or the iPhone?
00:22:21
This is one of the greatest inventions of all time. My husband and I would argue constantly over who had to cut the day's banana slices.
00:22:31
It's one of those chores no one wants to do. You know, the old, I spend the entire day rearing our children.
00:22:38
Maybe you can pitch in and cut these bananas. and of course you think I have the energy to slave over your damn bananas.
00:22:43
I worked a 12 hour shift just to come on to these, to this. I mean, this fucking thing goes on for like seven more paragraphs.
00:22:50
I love it. All right. Let me find one. Banana slicer. It's like a play. It's like people getting their creativity.
00:22:58
I love those. Amazon. Okay. The 10 best. Here's the thought catalog has the 10 best reviews for a big pens for her.
00:23:03
someone has answered my gentle prayers and finally designed a pen that i can use all month long
00:23:11
i use it when i'm swimming riding a horse walking on the beach and doing yoga it's comfortable
00:23:16
leak proof non-slip and it makes me feel so feminine and pretty since i've been using these
00:23:21
pens men have found me more attractive and approachable it's given me soft skin and
00:23:24
manageable hair and it's really given me the self-esteem i needed to start a book club and
00:23:28
flirt with the bait the bag boy at my local market my drawings of kittens and ponies have improved
00:23:32
And now that I'm writing my last name hyphenated with Robert Patterson's last name, I really
00:23:38
believe he may someday marry me. I'm positively giddy. Those smart men in marketing have come up with a pen that my lady parts can really identify
00:23:46
with. Where has this pen been all my life? That's the big pen for her. For her. And it's like pink and purple.
00:23:53
Probably a piece of shit pink pen with... Oh my God. So stupid. I do think we should do martyrs.
00:23:59
Okay. Okay. Just because there's some Trump lovers who are like, hey, can I have my favorite show?
00:24:05
Hey, why can't I have what I want? Oh, right. In 2016 America. Wait a second. I want something.
00:24:12
Give it to me now. Cut that part out, Steven. No, don't. I want something. Give it to me now.
00:24:23
And we're back. Why didn't we just turn this podcast into a reading reviews podcast?
00:24:27
You know how much easier our lives would have been? I mean, the work is done for you. You're just printing stuff up. And I mean, that is still a great idea. Yeah, come on. Let's podcast seven days a week. Well, the Haribo people stopped offering reduced sugar products. That whole thing was a bit of a mini scandal. And then I think they were like, oh, we can't use that chemical anymore.
00:24:48
Oh, too bad for them. Man, that bottom line is disappointed in that. Right. And that's really all that matters. This is so weird. It just feels like deja vu. And we are so hopeful that we're trying to look at the positive. We're trying not to be too, too political, which is hilarious because we are now.
00:25:07
I mean, there's no way around it. We have learned our lesson about scandal and online
00:25:13
meltdown cancellations. So no one's trying to be the subject of that ever again.
00:25:19
No. We're trying to be even, but I feel like that went away pretty quick after this,
00:25:25
which I'm happy about. It's a weird thing. Yeah. Fascism. It's super weird. Fascism is weird.
00:25:32
Yeah. And it's like a double. It's been doubled down now. So. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, here we are. Now we're just all kind of like, I look at my phone while I watch TV,
00:25:41
while I'm chewing on something that's usually getting me through. It helps. Dogs and cats help, I think. Animals.
00:25:49
For sure. Friends. Speaking of friends, this episode is all hometowns that you guys wrote in. This is
00:25:55
the first time that we had the idea just to do hometowns. And because I think we were kind of
00:26:00
busy that week and devastated, we let you guys do the homework. So let's get into the series of
00:26:05
hometowns. Hey, everyone. It's Cal Penn, host of Earsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook club. This week on
00:26:17
the podcast, I'm sitting down with Divergent author Veronica Roth to talk about her sprawling
00:26:22
new novel, Seek the Traitor's Son. It's a sci-fi fantasy epic about two protagonists on opposite
00:26:28
sides of a war and a prophecy neither of them wanted. My first book was Divergent. And when
00:26:34
that came out, like, because it was so popular, I think it attracted like mostly positivity,
00:26:39
but the negativity I sucked in like a sponge. And I think it was like critiques of things I
00:26:46
liked when I was like, you know, I was 23 and I wrote this book and it had all my like dorky little
00:26:50
cheesy or maybe unrealistic loves in it. And I started to feel a lot of shame about those things.
00:26:58
And so for the rest of my career, I steered away from those little things that like make you feel pleasure when you read.
00:27:06
But I also was like saying no to these parts of myself that I then was like, screw it.
00:27:13
So that's this book. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
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00:27:53
Hey, it's Rach. if you're like me, you want treats that are simple and taste amazing. And that's why I love
00:27:59
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00:28:04
Whether it's a quick snack for the kids or a sweet moment for yourself, Johnny Pops are the perfect
00:28:09
treat. And there's a kind deed on every stick to encourage everyone to share a little kindness.
00:28:15
So next time you're in the freezer aisle, grab a box of Johnny Pops and feel great about what
00:28:20
you're sharing. Johnny Pops, a better pop for a better world. I'll go first this week.
00:28:27
Please. Instead of asking, I'll volunteer. Please. I'll throw myself in front of the train.
00:28:31
Please. All right. So then this week, we're just going to read your hometown murders.
00:28:38
Yeah. As our main thing. Yeah. Oh, this starts off with a very professional note.
00:28:43
And it says, in the note, colon, in the unlikely event you refer to this story on air or publicly,
00:28:50
please do not share my name or email address. Anonymous is good enough. I love your podcast and look forward to each one every week.
00:28:57
Thanks for being awesome. Let's give out that email address. I love that it's so reasonable.
00:29:04
It's exactly what I needed that first time. I gave that woman's full information.
00:29:09
There's a second piece of information there that I'll tell you after the podcast that's really good,
00:29:13
but I don't think I should read it since I think it would indicate who this person is.
00:29:18
Is it a famous person? they have a connection to a famous serial killing team and their email address is justin at timberlake.com
00:29:29
his publicist is a real B so we give out his alright so here's what Anonymous has to say
00:29:39
my parents moved us to the Santa Clarita Valley near Magic Mountain and the site
00:29:44
of the San Francisco San Francisco Quito Dam disaster in 1988. Santa Clarita was
00:29:51
an underdeveloped and had a lot of wooded hills and was more of a small town People noticed new people moving in and local shops would call you by your first name We didn even have to lock our car doors That what my time was like In 1989
00:30:05
a little girl named Sarah Hodges disappeared in Newhall. She was only seven years old and her
00:30:09
parents assumed that she had maybe wandered off and gotten hurt or was at a friend's house and
00:30:13
hadn't told them. A citywide search was immediately put into place, including house to house searches,
00:30:19
dogs, mounted police helicopters, neighborhood volunteers searching the brush and woods.
00:30:23
one of the volunteers was her 14 year old neighbor named curtis cooper curtis had been
00:30:29
living with his father in florida until a few months before and now lived with his mom crystal
00:30:34
in a room she rented from mrs casmar it was rumored that curtis and crystal both slept in
00:30:41
the same large waterbed in a single room mrs casmar's house was five doors away from sarah's
00:30:46
house curtis used to play with sarah and sometimes went horseback riding with her and was one of the
00:30:51
first to volunteer for her when she disappeared. Red flag. This sounds familiar. It does.
00:30:57
I think you've done this one. Did I do the one where he... Because it's waterbed.
00:31:01
Oh, no, because he lived in a house with them. Oh, he did? No, yeah. But it's very familiar, very similar to the murder
00:31:07
I did once. Yeah. It's slightly older boy and little girl. And waterbed. And water... Holy shit.
00:31:13
Totally same thing. Okay. The dogs, the Mounted Police, the neighbors, and the house-to-house search, including Mrs. Kazmar's
00:31:19
house turned up nothing. Sarah's face was everywhere and she was the talk of the schools.
00:31:24
She was the lead news story every night and in all the papers. How could a seven-year-old just disappear in this small
00:31:29
sleepy shit-kickery town? Shortly after Sarah disappeared, the Coopers had a fan blowing
00:31:35
out their window running day and night. Mrs. Kazmar thought it was odd that the fan was blowing out instead
00:31:41
of in and that it was going all the time. She also began to smell something foul from the Coopers' room
00:31:47
and finally went to investigate while they were both out. Hell yeah, Mrs. Kazmar.
00:31:53
Rock the Kazmar. See, you still got it. You still got it. Just always. Rock the Kazmar.
00:32:00
Four days after she had disappeared, Mrs. Kazmar, some reports say it was Crystal,
00:32:06
found the fully clothed, decomposing body of Sarah Hodges. She was wedged between the wall
00:32:11
and the headboard of the waterbed. She was in there with both of them? Yeah, Curtis and Crystal
00:32:17
had slept with Sarah beneath their heads. with the fan blowing for three days. What the fuck?
00:32:23
At first, the news reported that maybe Sarah had been playing hide-and-go-seek and had wedged herself into tightly and snapped her neck.
00:32:30
That was a story the Coopers were selling anyway. However, an examination revealed Sarah had been strangled and sexually assaulted.
00:32:36
It was thought that she was murdered in Curtis's room and hidden there only a few hours before the deputies searched the house.
00:32:44
Oh, my God. It turns out that Curtis had been in trouble in Florida and had been arrested for committing several petty thefts and burglaries
00:32:51
and basically had to leave. Curtis claimed he had been looking for help for years
00:32:55
for his, quote, severe emotional problems. But in Florida, he was, quote, shifted from agency to agency
00:33:01
without ever receiving proper treatment. Apparently, whatever Curtis had done, it was bad enough for Florida not to want him.
00:33:09
That's what he wrote. The person wrote that. And I guess it was, according to the deputy district attorney who prosecuted him,
00:33:16
Curtis had planned the murder about a week before it occurred. Planned it? Planned it.
00:33:20
And also planned but never carried out a similar murder two years earlier while in Florida when he would have been around 12 or 13.
00:33:28
Holy shit. Oh, that deputy district attorney had claimed that Curtis had a belief that he had to kill to have sexual relations.
00:33:39
Although he was found by the court experts to have some brain damage, it was not enough for an insanity defense.
00:33:44
Curtis was convicted of a murder with a special allegation of sexual assault and received 25 years to life.
00:33:50
Although California Youth Authority could only actually hold him until he's 25. Which would have been in the year 2000.
00:33:57
Oh my God. Four months after Sarah was found, her father went to her grave site,
00:34:02
sat vigil all night, then shot and killed himself over her grave. He was only 36 years old.
00:34:07
Oh honey, all of them. Oh anonymous. That was a really good email. Who was molesting that kid then?
00:34:16
You know, like you don't just become a sexual predator at 12. I mean, he lived in Florida, any fucking thing.
00:34:21
It could have been like a clown in his closet. The worst things happen there. This will just go to show you how important it is to fund mental health facilities
00:34:31
and get people that mental health for the government to not defund and all the...
00:34:38
Goodbye. It's already been defunded. We haven't had that in so long. That's fair, but it's going to get worse.
00:34:44
But I think under this new Trump presidency, it's going to come back. Yeah. No, for sure.
00:34:48
I feel like that empathetic, you know, hold up your brother, care for others. Positive works.
00:34:54
It's going to be happening. Yeah, it's going to be beautiful. It's a brand new day.
00:35:00
All right. This is from Jacqueline. And of course, I read this because all caps subject line is
00:35:10
Adirondack nightmare. full on fucked up. Ladies, hello. Love the podcast, obviously,
00:35:17
but I'll get right to the point here. My brother told me the story yesterday about his fiance's cousin.
00:35:22
Fasten your seatbelts, motherfuckers. She wrote motherfuckers. My soon-to-be sister-in-law's cousin
00:35:30
was going through some shit, so her dad suggested she go up to the house in the Adirondacks for a few days
00:35:34
to clear her head. God, that sounds nice, doesn't it? I would love to be there right this second.
00:35:38
Let's go. Because also, it wouldn't be 105. It also wouldn't be 105. And then also, that would mean someone had money in your family.
00:35:46
Because having a house in the Adirondacks, that's got to be like fancy. I mean, don't they have their own chair?
00:35:50
The Adirondacks even have their own chair. It's an area of the country that has its own chair.
00:35:55
And it a comfy chair How rich do you have to be Like it a chair that you supposed to have a mojito in one hand Yes You know what I mean It a relaxing in the summertime chair Absolutely
00:36:05
She went out for a long weekend, had been hearing some noises in the vents and just around the house,
00:36:10
but she knew her dad had been having issues with squirrels in the house recently.
00:36:14
I bet it's not squirrels. It's not squirrels. So she didn't think anything of it
00:36:18
and just wrote it off for a few days. Bad idea. Bad idea. That's what that, yeah.
00:36:23
Finally, after a few days, she calls her dad and tells him about the noises she's been hearing.
00:36:27
And he tells her just to call the police to sort it out, as you do. She's reluctant at first because she doesn't want to bother the police if it's nothing.
00:36:34
And then she wrote, fuck politeness. But her dad... I don't want to bother the police.
00:36:38
I don't want to bother the police's job. It is to check things out. Yeah. So I'm just going to get murdered.
00:36:42
I don't know if that's true. But her dad convinces her to call, so she does. Listen to a man when he tells you what to do.
00:36:48
Oh, man. She tells the police... We're just like... It's so angry. We were just attacking anyone that comes into the line of sight.
00:36:55
His sweet dad was like, honey, I'm worried about you. Fuck that dad. Fuck him. Fuck the Adirondack chair.
00:37:00
Fuck it all. She tells the police the deal and they say, sure, we'll come check it out.
00:37:05
Are you alone in the house? To which she replies, yes. And they say, okay, no problem.
00:37:09
We'll come check it out. Just give us a few hours. Nowhere than five minutes later, a squad of police cars roll up to her house, lights and sirens ablaze and then tell her to get out of the house now.
00:37:19
Come outside. turns out there was a fucking man in her basement the entire time building a fucking cage to fucking
00:37:27
keep her in no what he was building the cage in her house yeah she had gone on a date with this
00:37:33
man a few weeks prior and he had been stalking her ever since he followed her upstate and casually
00:37:40
fucking began building a goddamn cage to keep her in in the basement this is all her in the basement
00:37:46
of her own house. I wish I'd say this for last because how are we going to beat this?
00:37:50
No, I know. This is the one to beat. The cops were able to figure it out because when she told them
00:37:54
she was alone in the house, they saw or heard, I'm not sure, that someone else was
00:37:58
on the phone line in the house. When I'm yelling, it's all her all caps, but also me freaking the fuck out.
00:38:04
They saw that someone else was on the phone line in the house. That's some straight out of a scary story
00:38:11
you tell at a slumber party shit, she says. That is. it's like that's an urban legend for sure yeah she probably made it up uh easy
00:38:20
sorry i don't be jackie i mean this is certain no i'm sure she's fine the creepiest thing to me
00:38:26
is that this dickweed had plenty of time to do whatever he wanted with this girl but he was
00:38:30
keeping her like a pet until the very right moment to to do god knows what thank god nothing
00:38:36
happened to her and she was able to stay sexy and not get cage murdered keep up the good work ladies
00:38:41
Bye. Oh my God. Thank you, Jackie. Jackie, that was fucking... That was nuts. Epic.
00:38:48
That... Do you want to know what that reminded me of? Yes. I just had a recovered memory.
00:38:53
Now... Something happened to you? Yes. Ooh. But it doesn't... Clearly, it's not going to end this game.
00:38:58
I would hope it's not. It's not. Similar. But this was... I came home from being...
00:39:04
So after I lived in Sacramento, I moved back home... Right. ...to live with my parents for a year
00:39:09
because I had failed college and I had failed life. Right. And so I had to go back home and live with my parents to just be a failure.
00:39:16
That's always fun. I did that too. But I would drive up to Sacramento to hang out with my friends
00:39:20
because my whole social circle was like an hour and a half away. Really sucked a lot.
00:39:25
So this one time I came home and I was going to go downtown to meet somebody. I can't remember. It was like a bar or whatever.
00:39:33
And I was blow drying my hair. And also we had this cat that was acting crazy, just being super weird and flinching and doing weird shit.
00:39:41
And I kept going like, why are you doing that? And so I heard a loud noise while I was blow drying my hair.
00:39:50
So I turned the blow dry off and I just stand there. And then I'm hearing like very faint noises.
00:39:57
So like a tick here, almost like house settling. Yeah, like someone moving slowly through the house.
00:40:03
Yeah, or just the house settling. Like I can't tell. So I go into my parents' room and their closet had its own door on it.
00:40:12
And I go to open the door. No, don't open it. And it won't open. It's like someone's pushing back on the door.
00:40:20
Karen! And so I run out of the house, get into my car. Oh my God, I'm going to cry.
00:40:26
And drive to my old house because this was the house we moved into when I was a teen.
00:40:31
In the city. Exactly. I drive out to... And this is also... You know what? Maybe I wasn't going out
00:40:38
because it was like late at night. It was like 11 o'clock at night. I go out to my old neighbor, Andy Withington's,
00:40:43
and I wake him up. Him and his roommate, Craig, were like sleeping in this weird part of their house.
00:40:49
And I'm like, there's someone in my house. You have to come with me. I get them to come back to the house with me.
00:40:57
They're all like buoyed up. Yeah. Yeah, let's check this shit out. We go in. We're looking around everywhere. And then Andy goes to open that door, the closet door. And he opens it and it was like kind of stuck. So I was like, oh, that's probably what it was. And then as we're both standing, he's like, it was stuck. You're so stupid. And I'm like, oh, yeah. And then I look up and there's one of those attic holes.
00:41:24
and the attic hole thing is turned to the side. And I was just like, look, I just pointed up at him
00:41:33
and he's like, holy fuck. And we ran out and called 911. Oh my God. And the Petaluma police, because it's a tiny town,
00:41:41
were there like literally like in two minutes, there was a cop walking in my backyard.
00:41:47
Holy shit. Like sneaking around. It was crazy. And then I had to give this whole thing
00:41:50
and there was no one there and it was no one and it was nothing. and I don't know why.
00:41:54
No it was something They looked up in the attic like they looked everywhere and it was nothing It was something It was so crazy and scary Also because in between the time where I thought someone was pushing back
00:42:06
on my parents' closet door, jumping into the car and driving out to the country to get Andy Withington
00:42:12
was like one of the scariest things I've ever done. Oh, because you're like, someone's following me
00:42:16
or in my backseat. Or just what is happening. But that doesn't make it... Okay. That doesn't make any sense
00:42:22
that both those things happened together, especially the second part. The only thing is the second part,
00:42:29
it could have already been like that. And I just never knew. It was like one of those things you don't notice.
00:42:32
Sure. So what did your parents say? My dad's like, you need to take it easy. Of course.
00:42:38
Thanks, dad. My dad's like, drama. Oh, yeah. Men fucking belittling women. And they're fucking...
00:42:45
This was the one that George just got. Militant. Are you ready for everything you could ever want
00:42:53
in a murder story? Yeah. Because that's what I got right here from Lauren. Cool.
00:42:58
She said, okay, this may end up a little long, but it's totally worth it. I grew up in a small Northwest suburb of Chicago.
00:43:04
My whole life, I've been hearing about the Columbo murders. It happened around the corner from the house I grew up in,
00:43:09
but I wasn't born until 10 years later. Here goes. In 1976, Patty Columbo and her loser boyfriend, DeLuca,
00:43:16
broke into the home she grew up in and murdered her mother, father, and 13-year-old brother.
00:43:21
The father, Frank, was shot by DeLuca and then bludgeoned with a bowling trophy by Patty.
00:43:26
Ooh, that's symbolic. That's not good. Patty's mom, Mary, was found cowering in the bathroom.
00:43:31
She was shot between the eyes, which medical examiners said killed her before she even hit the floor.
00:43:36
And then her throat was slit. Oh, honey. You know, just to be sure. Here's the most fucked up part.
00:43:42
And this is bad because it's her 13-year-old brother. Yeah. Her brother, Michael, 13, had slept through the initial attack.
00:43:49
so Patty and her boyfriend DeLuca woke him up by shooting at him. Then Patty stabbed her brother 87 times with sewing scissors.
00:43:59
Oh my God. When he was found, officers thought he had a case of the measles. But then they realized his measles were little gashes all over his body.
00:44:10
Holy shit. Patty and DeLuca then set the thermostat to 97, left the house. The bodies weren't found until three days later.
00:44:18
When Patty was informed of the murders, instead of rushing to their side, she started pointing fingers to potential leads and even tried to tie the mob, Chicago, what up, tie in the mob, sorry.
00:44:30
At the funeral, she was openly flirting with detectives who, with a detective who was playing the role to make Patty crack.
00:44:38
After more digging, they found a bunch of fucked up shit, like a film of Patty having sex with DeLuca's German shepherd.
00:44:45
Oh, no. oh, oh, no. And then in all caps, she wrote, like, how does that even work?
00:44:55
Oh, no. Oh, no, Lauren. This is terrible. This is terrible. Keep going. Well, oh, so her boyfriend,
00:45:07
Patty's boyfriend, was 36 and she was 16. Shut up. Yep. Ew. And he was married with five kids.
00:45:17
What the fuck? Can you imagine? So I'm 36, married with five kids, dating a 16-year-old.
00:45:22
16-year-old. All of that, including the kids, sounds impossible. It sounds so boring to me.
00:45:29
Yep. A 16-year-old, you'd be like, aside from Pokemon Go, what do you like? Or like, aside from the shooting video game or virtual reality?
00:45:39
I don't know. Killing your family. Wearing neon pink sunglasses all the time. you were naming the other thing they like oh yeah killing your whole family i was just naming that
00:45:50
i mean what more is there than me on pink sunglasses now she's a model prisoner who
00:45:55
can't read patty is she's still in jail hmm what year oh man fuck everything uh oh they got indeterminate life sentences which really means 200 to 300 years holy shit so good
00:46:09
A little justice got served there. Oh, she also ran a prostitution ring in jail.
00:46:16
What? This woman sounds diabolical. She's like trying to take the devil's place.
00:46:22
Yeah. She's trying to out evil. Good God that had. I mean, Lauren, when you said this,
00:46:29
it had everything you could ever want in a murder story. It had a lot of things I did not want.
00:46:34
Yeah. Did not want. That's true. Have never wanted. Totally. Okay. This one is from Mary and it's called My Husband's Murder House.
00:46:43
hey george and karen i've been binging on your podcast over the past two months on my drive to
00:46:48
and from work since i tote my puppy with me so that i can drop him off at doggy daycare he's been
00:46:55
binge listening too and his cute puppy face makes it easier to get through the more depressing parts
00:47:00
of your podcast uh picture please um you two are hilarious though and i feel much better trained
00:47:06
to avoid ever getting murdered thanks okay uh so she has two murders let's just try this one
00:47:12
and see if it's good enough to get to the second one. Yeah. The first took place at my husband's previous house
00:47:17
and he, my husband, met the murderer. My husband sold his home near Columbus, South Carolina
00:47:23
to Shedrick and Kia Miller, that sound made up, in 2012, about a year before we met.
00:47:30
The couple appeared to be very happy and moved into the house with their two small children.
00:47:34
Skip ahead a year or so. In January 2014, Shedrick's mother hadn't heard from him in several days
00:47:40
and went to his house to check on him. She found the two children, age three and one, so sad, dead in their beds, and the couple dead in their bed just down the hall.
00:47:49
According to the police investigation, the mother and two children had been shot in the head by the father-husband,
00:47:55
and then Shutterick turned the gun on himself and committed suicide. Crazy to believe, especially since no one suspected anything was wrong with the family.
00:48:04
They held Bible studies in their home and church members said they didn't show any signs of having problems.
00:48:08
Same from the neighbors. What about holding Bible studies in your home? What about inviting people into your home?
00:48:14
Like fucking psychopaths. Get out of my home. I mean, I'm getting my carpet clean and I want to charge tomorrow and I want to charge everyone who's ever been in my apartment to get my carpet clean.
00:48:25
Oh, that's a good idea. Isn't it? Yeah. I'll give you like $7. Perfect. Thank you.
00:48:29
Stephen? You in for a couple bucks? I'll give you five. Thank you. Oh, yeah. Okay, let's see.
00:48:37
Kia's sister came forward shortly after, though, and stated that Kia had talked to her about Shudderick's overbearing control of her,
00:48:43
but that since he wasn't violent towards her, Kia thought she'd be okay. One positive of the story is that Kia's sister is now sharing her sister's abuse story
00:48:50
and her own experiences in an abusive relationship with others in an effort to help women in the same situation.
00:48:57
the other story is a little more unnerving for me and a warning to single ladies to be very
00:49:02
careful about who you get involved with I'm sorry I have to read it the other story is more unnerving
00:49:07
than the story you just read I think should I you might as well this is a fucking
00:49:14
this is a fucking shit show this is a everything is going wrong episode 42 is an abject
00:49:22
failure this episode is going to be called abject failure right yes the victim Jennifer Wilson was my professor for a graduate course and I want to express that she
00:49:33
was an intelligent compassionate caring and beautiful woman who I had the greatest respect
00:49:38
for I'm gonna guess she's dead now probably I mean uh anyways and she just talks about something
00:49:43
totally different yeah uh and the loss of her life impacted a lot of people she was brutally killed by
00:49:49
Hank Hayes on in 2011 she had met Hank Hayes through a dating site and they dated on and off
00:49:56
for a little while. Hayes, H-A-W-E-S is Hayes. Or is that Hayes, right? How? Hayes?
00:50:03
H-A-W-E-S? Uh-huh. Hawes? Hawes. Was a little obsessed with Jennifer though and not in a good way.
00:50:10
I mean, one's a good way. I mean. She picked up on this and made an effort to end the relationship
00:50:14
but he refused to let her move on. He would constantly text her and wouldn't leave her alone.
00:50:19
He showed up to her home in the middle of the night one evening and attacked her.
00:50:24
One of her neighbors heard her pleading for her life called the police. When they arrived,
00:50:28
Jennifer had been stabbed 12 times in her neck and upper body and had defensive wounds
00:50:32
on her arms. Her body and hair had been clean. She was unclothed, wrapped in a duvet cover
00:50:39
and placed on her couch. Haas was still in the home. His clothes soaked in blood
00:50:44
and he had slit his wrist in an attempt to commit suicide. He was tried for Jennifer's murder
00:50:49
and it only took the jury 30 minutes to determine he was guilty. Wow. He is currently serving
00:50:53
a life sentence without parole. Ugh, What a wrenched man. Ladies, watch out for yourselves.
00:50:58
Hug your puppies and cats and don't get murdered. Thanks again for the awesome podcast.
00:51:02
Mary. I feel like I saw that story where the guy is like on an ID channel, like some kind of stalking show.
00:51:14
Yeah. Because. Oh, yeah. There's those stalked, awful stalked shows. I mean, they have every version of every horrible thing that's happened to people as a series.
00:51:22
Bleep Did I Marry? I mean. That's a show. What about Swampkin or something like that?
00:51:28
Or Swamp Killers. Swamp Killers. Just only murders in swamps. They have just ones of siblings only.
00:51:37
What else is there? People who have used mason jars only to kill people. Oh, you mean the Martha Stewart murders?
00:51:46
It's called the Shabby Chic murders. She thought she was classy, but she was just cheap.
00:51:54
Turns out she wanted a light stain on her old bookcase. And that would be the end of her.
00:51:59
But instead, this stain was of blood on her carpet. It would be fun to be one of those voiceover people for the ID channel.
00:52:11
Yeah. Because you kind of talk like this, and then you talk like this. And the reality is.
00:52:16
And then it's scary down here. Everything's fine, and you're wonderful, but then.
00:52:20
But then you go into the basement. And something happens. okay we're back from a really solid set of hometowns in which one of them yes is definitely
00:52:36
a creepypasta fake fucking story that i yeah that happens the thing is we're not 14 no so we won't
00:52:45
have our eye out for things as soon as i was re-listening to it i was like how did i not
00:52:49
No, he was not building a cage in the basement and called the cops and the cops.
00:52:53
Like, what the fuck? But it's not unreasonable because then I go on to tell the Todd Kolup murder story, who is a person who kept women in.
00:53:02
That's right. Basically in containers. Right. What are those things called? Shipping containers.
00:53:07
It's not out of the question. That's a really good point. No. I think what we learned is that.
00:53:10
At all. If anyone's sister-in-law said this is true, it's not true. we need it from like the first the source or like the next door neighbor not the like
00:53:20
yeah when it's too perfect a like plot with the details too perfectly creepy and it's not first
00:53:29
person yeah or like some sort of you can't hear once removed yeah that's all we can do right we
00:53:34
need to verify and we're supposed to trust but we don't that's how we do it over here but there
00:53:39
are some updates my second story was about the colombo murders the update is just that frank
00:53:45
deluca died in prison in 2023 and patty colombo is still in prison she was just denied parole in
00:53:53
2024 so yeah horrifying yeah all right let get into more hometowns Hey, everyone.
00:54:06
It's Cal Penn, host of Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Lily Chu, the author of the Audible original romantic comedy Just Kiss Already.
00:54:19
It's a story about a forensic anthropologist who secretly writes mystery novels,
00:54:23
an actress who adapts his book into a film, and what happens when a meme and a media tour collide with a slow burn romance.
00:54:32
It's performed by Simu Liu and Philippa Su, and it is an absolute blast. When you actually hear the performance, you realize that other people are taking your words,
00:54:44
and what you thought was kind of a straightforward sentence like, the cat in the corner is black.
00:54:49
In my head, it's the cat in the corner is black, not the dog, not the gerbil. But someone else might say it, the cat in the corner is black.
00:54:57
That's always fascinating to me, how they just bring in all these different nuances
00:55:01
and really make it fun and interesting and distinctive. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeart Radio app
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Do you want to do one more? Are you done? I mean, let's see. I think I marked one more.
00:56:56
Okay. Why don't you, let's see. Why don't you. Why don't. Oh, wait. I've just found another one.
00:57:05
Okay, you go. Ready? Oh, this is one that I got excited when I saw because we already talked about this.
00:57:15
It's firsthand. So it's from Stephanie. And the subject line is, the story is everything my favorite murder dreams slash nightmares are made of.
00:57:22
Hello, ladies. First and foremost, I love your podcast and I can't get enough. I recently started listening and got my mom hooked too.
00:57:29
Yay. I'm pretty sure. Hi. I'm pretty sure my husband is deeply unsettled by this
00:57:34
and doesn't understand my true crime fascination. I feel like that's a trifecta.
00:57:38
Someone finds it, they tell their mom, their husband is freaked out by them. That keeps happening.
00:57:42
I love it. I think that's how great marriages are built. Yeah. So my hometown murder is probably something
00:57:48
you've seen in the news recently. And it takes place mainly in Spartanburg, South Carolina.
00:57:54
I said North, but it's South. Yes. Todd Kohlhepp has been charged with kidnapping
00:58:00
Kala Brown or Kayla Brown, Kala, and keeping her chained by the neck and ankles for two months inside a metal storage container on his property.
00:58:09
Did I mention Kayla lived down the street from me in Anderson, South Carolina? As if it wasn't horrifying enough.
00:58:15
Turns out he's a full-fledged serial killer and a bunch of bodies, and they found a bunch of bodies buried on his property.
00:58:23
In 1987, Todd Kohlhepp was convicted in Arizona for kidnapping and sexually assaulting a 14-year-old girl.
00:58:29
He was only 15 at the time of the crime. What? Oh, I didn't see that. It's really nice when we talk vaguely about something
00:58:36
and then someone comes in with the facts and fills them in for us. It's great. We don't even have to do any research.
00:58:41
I love this. Me too. Kolop served 14 years in prison for this crime and registered as a sex offender when he got out.
00:58:49
He decided to resettle in South Carolina where he purchased 100 secluded acres of land.
00:58:54
That's always a good sign. Red flag, red flag. Add that to the red flag list. It's long.
00:59:00
Secluded acres of land. over 10 secluded acres. You don't need it. You don't need that many.
00:59:07
I don't even know what that looks like. It's really big. Yeah. And it's only for cows.
00:59:12
And storage containers. She said, can he be any more murdery? How was he allowed to do this?
00:59:20
I mean, I guess it wasn't near a school or park, but just furthers the case for staying out of the damn woods.
00:59:25
He became a real estate agent. Oh, why does that? For some reason, that really bothers me.
00:59:31
Because he's around people all the time, families. And houses. Yes, and houses. She was working for him.
00:59:39
Oh. Eventually starting his own company and employing as many as 10 other agents.
00:59:43
Do you have to disclose your sex offender status to your employees? If you're the boss, you probably don't, right?
00:59:48
I don't know. So how do you feel about working for... She's like writing a play.
00:59:52
So how do you feel about working for a violent sex offender Yeah that crazy Yeah You can just go on and live your normal life I would think that you do have to notify he just didn I bet it was on the record somewhere
01:00:06
So if you searched sex offenders in your area, he would come up. But I bet he doesn't have to tell them if he's the boss.
01:00:13
Right. Maybe kids, but then if kids, like your kid comes to the office. Fuck, man.
01:00:21
I mean, clearly this guy wasn't fucking following the rules to begin with. And here's the thing.
01:00:24
If you just got a new job, you want to check LinkedIn. You want to check... Sex offenders.
01:00:32
The sex offenders registry. Yeah. Just do it. Just do it. Anyways, on August 31st,
01:00:37
Calla Brown and Charlie Carver, who live right up the street from me, went missing when they answered an ad for Colep
01:00:42
to do some work, help cleaning up the property. When they arrived, he pulled a gun and took them hostage.
01:00:49
He immediately shot and killed Charlie and buried him in a shallow grave next to where the shipping container...
01:00:53
So she knew. Yeah, she did. Where Kala was chained up for over two months, two days after the couple went missing, Anderson County police started pinging Kala's cell phone, which eventually led police to Kala's property.
01:01:05
It took them two weeks to get a search warrant. They started with flyovers of the property before taking their search to the ground.
01:01:12
Police eventually heard Kala pounding on the storage container and they found her unharmed.
01:01:17
Shortly after Kala was rescued, police realized they were dealing with a serial killer.
01:01:21
they have since found three other bodies on the property. He also confessed to a 13-year-old case where four employees
01:01:28
at a Spartansburg motorcycle shop were shot in the back in broad daylight with no witnesses. I mean,
01:01:34
what in the actual fuck? Google it. There is a weird... There is weird shit coming out
01:01:40
daily on this guy. I am a transplant from Chicago and am seen often as the northern
01:01:46
aggressor who won't say hi to anyone, but this further proves your argument of fuck politeness. Apologize later.
01:01:51
I do not need help with my groceries. I don't want to start small talk over my accent.
01:01:55
And thank you, Todd Kolop, for ruining nature. Thanks for taking the time to read my story.
01:02:00
Stay out of the woods. Stay sexy. Don't get murdered, Stephanie. What the fuck? That was crazy.
01:02:05
I wonder who the other bodies are. And I want to look up that fucking shooting. I love when like, okay,
01:02:10
like the murder I know I'm going to do in Chicago, like there's one or two, but these like huge crimes that people don't,
01:02:18
like a mass shooting and people are like, how, like the yogurt shop murder. Yeah.
01:02:22
It's like, how the fuck do we still not know who did these? And then just some guy confesses and it's like, okay.
01:02:26
Yeah. We would have never found this person. Yeah. He has no links, no ties. It's just some random person that's living to escape these evil things they've done.
01:02:37
And moving away, like moving to South Carolina, moving to the countryside so that they, so
01:02:43
that. I mean, at first when I, when this story broke and they were like, we found a kidnapped girl.
01:02:47
then it was like, I was so happy for her. You know, like her life's going to suck
01:02:52
and be awful and hard to get through, but she can get through it. And I was, when there's a survivor story,
01:02:57
I'm so fucking relieved and happy, but it's just not, it's not, I mean, her boyfriend was killed next to her,
01:03:05
you know, probably, and as an intimidation thing for her and Barry, what a fucking.
01:03:11
I mean, who knows? Who knows? No, it's hugely, huge trauma and insane, but she did live.
01:03:17
and that's totally that's that is amazing because that those are the stories i mean there's four
01:03:23
other bodies on his property or three other bodies on his property and four people he killed in a
01:03:27
motorcycle shop she's so lucky i know so lucky to be alive god bless her as karen would say
01:03:34
god bless god bless her god bless her how long should we do one short one more and then and then
01:03:40
to have charity corner? Sure. Okay. All right. This is called my hometown horror.
01:03:48
Hey, I'm new to your podcast. Nice work, by the way. And I don't know if you're still wanting stories
01:03:53
about hometown murders. Oh, we are. But here's mine if you want it or not. I want you, Casey,
01:03:59
I want you to be more confident. Casey, I feel like you feel very vulnerable sending in this murder.
01:04:04
Yeah. And we got you, baby. You don't need to make yourself small. No. We're here with you.
01:04:09
celebrate good times. Come on. Come on. So Casey says, back when I was about six or seven, something
01:04:18
happened that shook our town to this day. A 17-year-old girl went out for a run on endless country roads in this
01:04:24
area. Dumbass. Never run alone. Like, how do you not know that? It was the 90s. Well, not surprisingly, she went missing.
01:04:32
Years and years went by. Flash forward to 2010, another jogger finds his trash bag on the side of the road.
01:04:37
For whatever reason, this weirdo decides to look into the bag. Inside were... It's like there's all victims.
01:04:44
Everyone's a fucking idiot. Casey hates everybody. She sounds like me. Inside were some
01:04:50
of the remains of the woman dismembered and shoved into the bag. Upon further investigation,
01:04:54
four more bags were found scattered around the country. County, not country. County, all containing
01:04:59
the same woman's pieces. Fucking hell. It was that girl that had gone missing in the 90s.
01:05:05
Grown up and fucking dismembered. grown up. Wait. The girl who was a teenager and went missing in the fucking 90s.
01:05:16
Oh, this wasn't her teenage body. This was her grown up. This is what it looks like.
01:05:21
Some fucked up fuck kidnapped that girl, held her for almost 20 years, murdered her.
01:05:26
This is a sad ending to your last story. Then fucking dismembered her and threw her in the side ditch.
01:05:33
Yep, that's what happened here. Nothing had happened before that and nothing has happened since.
01:05:37
The fucker was never caught and the poor family never got any answers. He lives in town, clearly, right? You wouldn't bring
01:05:45
her all the way back to town. You look so sad. Well, I just don't. I mean, I don't have a theory
01:05:51
except for it so dark It just like So dark The 20 years are horrible But what really screws up my mind is that this rando kept this innocent girl alive somewhere close to this town for almost 20 years
01:06:06
No one was able to find and save her. How terrible must have felt to be her and not be able to get help for that long.
01:06:12
Also, how sad for her family to realize. It's so awful. And then said, also, what possesses someone to hold someone hostage for that long and then all of a sudden kill them?
01:06:20
What could have happened to make him snap and murder her after so long? okay I'll stop thinking about it and let you guys
01:06:25
mull this over thanks thanks thanks well I mean aren't these always the questions that come up that cannot be
01:06:33
answered it's the reason that everybody's interested in this stuff and yeah I mean what
01:06:40
kind of monster what does he look like does he look like have you seen pictures of
01:06:43
Todd Kolap the other guy yeah he's really big yeah like he's a very very large man yeah I just
01:06:51
wonder like after 20 years like don't you get attached to this to the your victim at some point
01:06:58
not if you're a psychopath or a psychopath right no way which you would have to be to do that
01:07:03
i mean no it's they found her adult body i was not expecting that i thought maybe they would
01:07:10
find her you know like she had been kept somewhere as a dead teen body it's just a new low poor sweet
01:07:18
angel. Poor sweet little... Oh, man. Well, we went up for a little while and then we just went right
01:07:26
back down. What do we expect? I don't know. Well, I feel just as awful. How about you? Yeah, I feel pretty bad.
01:07:35
Well, at the end of the show now, we're doing one good thing. Saying one good thing that happened to us this week. Oh, yeah. What good thing happened to you this week?
01:07:42
Nothing. But I want to say that I... Karen we donated some money as my favorite murder
01:07:50
today so Brian Safi and Aaron Gibson from the Throwing a Shade podcast started posting
01:07:58
on Instagram just screen grabs of the the charities they were just donating to and it was just like
01:08:06
just do this just like they kept posting places that they were donating to and I was like
01:08:10
alright you know what I feel like shit I'm gonna try that so I did a couple and I did one
01:08:14
as my favorite murder to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Great.
01:08:20
So we did that. That's been a good thing. That's perfect. Right? That's a great thing.
01:08:25
Yeah. Yeah. Money counts. Spend your money wisely. Yeah. And if you don't have money to give,
01:08:32
just give blood or become a donor marrow transplant. I'm on the donor marrow transplant.
01:08:37
Are you a donor? I'm a donor. What did I say? Wow. I didn't even catch that. Don't marry.
01:08:46
Shit, man. And can I point out I've been drinking water this whole time? Yeah, it's so cold.
01:08:51
I mean, I'm shit-based, but I'm just having been drinking. But you're just drinking water.
01:08:56
Bone marrow transplant donor list and blood. Try to give money. You're just like,
01:09:04
give every possible thing. Give it all away. You know what it is? Just try to do things
01:09:08
for other people. That's actually, it really is something that makes people feel better
01:09:12
is when you make human connection and you help out. Yep. Be a helper. I think that's a great idea.
01:09:18
It's also something that I have to say, like I'm not that good at because I'm always like time and pain
01:09:26
or my comfort or whatever. I feel like that's something I would like to do better at,
01:09:31
which is like, that's the whole idea of like volunteering is sacrifice and you're supposed to be kind of giving of yourself.
01:09:37
It's supposed to be time off of your couch where you're not comfortable. Yeah. That's the whole idea.
01:09:42
Yeah. Yeah. um well go go you guys go do something good for someone yeah and it'll make you feel better about
01:09:51
fucked up everything is right that's how it happens right let us know if it works yeah hey
01:09:58
elvis come in here um thanks for listening you guys we hope uh we hope you know we have hope
01:10:04
uh stay sexy and don't get murdered elvis do you want a cookie come on man oh man oh mimi you want a cookie mimi no mom mimi want to be my friend elvis
01:10:20
cookie hi cookie cookie all right i think i heard him cookie i mean see we go yeah there
01:10:33
yeah here it comes here it goes elvis want a cookie you want finally want cookie take your time
01:10:40
Well, now you're going to have to wait for a cookie. Yeah. Cookie. Cookie. He's like, yeah.
01:10:47
All right. Bye. Bye. Okay, we're back. So, Karen, any updates? The update is just that the story was still unfolding when I was talking about it in this 2016 episode.
01:11:03
400 episodes later I do the deep dive which is the super bike murders case in episode 458
01:11:11
it's called The Demands Are Incredible that episode and you get the entirety of the story
01:11:16
which is actually kind of cool that like the story had just broken of finding Kayla Brown
01:11:21
on his property and then this is basically like now here's everything they know including a cold case
01:11:27
yeah totally that was a great story you did a great job in that one thank you that is episode 458
01:11:33
So, I mean, abject failure is a pretty great name for this episode. So perfect. But a couple other options in case, because we always need options.
01:11:43
Like you said, you called it greetings corner. I was meeting people at the acupuncturist or Madewell or whatever.
01:11:51
Yeah. And then we could also call it bloated as a balloon about sugar-free gummy bears, those dreaded things.
01:11:58
Forever. I mean, that should be the... the title just because that was the episode.
01:12:01
Bloated as a balloon. It was a diarrhea episode. There's also justinattimberlake.com,
01:12:06
which was your joke about it's a famous person's email. That is so funny. Oh my gosh.
01:12:12
And also, what about the lesson of we've been through this before. People stick together and keep their heads on straight.
01:12:20
People are coming out and showing up and rising up and it's really amazing to see.
01:12:25
So all is not lost. Yep. Love it. Thanks for listening. and we will talk at you soon.
01:12:32
Stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Elvis, do you want a cookie? Ah! Running a business shouldn't feel like
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