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This is Exactly Right. Hello. Hello. And welcome to Rewind with Karen in Georgia.
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That's right. It's Wednesday, and that means we're recapping one old episode with all new commentary, updates, and of course, emotional insights.
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We gotta have those. Today we're recapping episode number 52, which we named Bonjour, Internet.
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Because we're fucking classy. That's why. This episode came out January 17th, 2017.
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So we're doing this show for a year, essentially. And this, interestingly enough, is the first episode ever recorded in the Podloft.
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That's right. That's so exciting. Let's listen to the intro of episode number 52.
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Steven. yes oh my god this feels like poltergeist part 4 or something it has a Duran Duran quality to it as well
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yeah yes Steven look we're your mothers and we're really proud of you that was great
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nice now what setting was that on Bossa Nova it's amazing what you can do with that
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yeah it was so each time it's been like a different drum setting on the Casio The first one was Samba
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I really liked that one I really thought that was beautiful It was like haunting
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Now was it a conscious choice to pull Your own vocals out And just let it be an instrumental
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I just wanted to I don't know I just wanted something with some glockenspiel in it
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You know You wanted to glock around Yeah you gotta pull out that glock every once in a while
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That was gorgeous It's really good Karen When I like, do you ever get like, I wrote that song.
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Yeah. I get really pissed. But then I go through all these other emotions. Like hungry.
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Lonely, tired, angry. Shut down. Entirely shut down. Yeah. Like, oh, there's a dog over there.
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Yeah. Distracted. Distracted is the final stage of grief. Distracted by dogs is a special.
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No, I love this idea that Steven's reconnoitering the theme song. because we're probably all a tiny bit 52 right we've heard us 52 times oh yeah
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I mean it's you know we need a refresher I like the idea and it's a fun like yeah reconnoitering
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we have to reconnoiter I've never heard that really Yiddish it's uh it's my my Irish grandmother
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used to say it but say Yiddish Yiddish words yeah no she was fluent and saying Yiddish words
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every once in a while. Do you know what's funny? I actually just thought of this the other day
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because we were, somebody was telling a story about maids. My grandmother was a maid.
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She came to this country and she was like 17 and she was a maid in San Francisco
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until she got married basically. A maids. A maidsing. Yep. For like 15 years. That should have been.
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And one of the places that she worked in, no, it's not gonna be scary, but it's just,
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she worked for a family that lived in Seacliff, which is like the ritziest part of San Francisco,
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as you might know. It's like nobody knows that it's there I don't know what that is.
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I live there. You know what it is? When you're driving over the Golden Gate Bridge to go to San Francisco, the left hand side
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is the marina and Fisherman's Wharf and all that stuff. The right hand side looks like a forest, but that's actually mansions.
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I know. I did not know that. It's hidden mansions. And so my grandmother was a maid for a family.
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Well, she just called them the Jews. And she would always say, I think the Jews are nice.
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The Jews are real nice. Oh, I worked for nice Jews. And then you and I came together and you were like, I think the Jews are nice.
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I think she cracked the door open of in my mind. I podcast with a nice Jew. Grandma, I think you'd be proud about that.
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We're still in cahoots with nice Jews. And they're still nice Jews. They're still out there.
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What year was that? Like the fucking thirties, I think. Yeah. Yeah. We, they didn't, nobody liked us back then.
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Well, nobody liked anybody. Nobody liked the Irish. Nope. That was back when there were signs that said
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don't hire the Irish in every store. They thought that the two of us were a fucking
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plague on humanity and you know what? They can suck it. Am I wrong? I mean, were they wrong or were they wrong?
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I mean, who's on top now with a podcast? Me and you. Grandma, check it out. Grandma, let me show you something.
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She'd be like, I don't like all the talking. You called her vulgar. Yeah, she would actually be
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insanely pissed about the F's. all those f's um oh the french is what you're saying she doesn't like when i speak french
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because she doesn't like the french oh man who knows uh okay steven pull it steven pull it
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take all that out um welcome to my favorite murder that a bad start in terms of the racist issues Welcome to my favorite murder That Irish person is Karen Kilgara
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And that Jewish person is Georgia Yale Hardstark. That's the fastest Jewish name I could think of.
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It's called, it's Georgia, Los Angeles City College Dropout Hardstark is actually, would be more accurate.
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I didn't go to Yale. I meant the Jewish name Yale, Y-A-E-L. Oh, yeah, like Yale.
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Oh, is that how you pronounce it? Like the gorgeous chick from Orange is the New Black.
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Yeah, which one? That's her name. The one who's like, when me and so-and-so are going to get married.
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Bora, Bora, Bora. Yes, yes. She is- Her first name's Yale. Yale. And she was in an episode of the show called-
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Steven, help me out here. Deadbeat. okay that's the show called deadbeat about a dude who's a drug dealer in manhattan and there's a
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special episode that's like the dog episode and it makes no sense it's on hbo i think and the people
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who wrote it were like this is this episode and sent it to hbo and they're like you can't give us
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any notes on it like they were hard which you know is like unheard of right like you they're just like
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no notes and it is the one of the most gorgeous even can you find out what the name of the episode
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Like it's one of the most gorgeous episodes of television. Is this a new TV show called Deadbeat?
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It's new. It's like it's first season, but it's kind of a show. The episode is just in the perspective of this dog.
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And Yael is the dog walker. And you're just going to fall in love with her. Like she's so.
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Anyway, what were we talking about? This is a murder. So this is a murder podcast.
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That's yeah, we're in the end. But it's good to know it's pronounced Yael. That's what I think.
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I could be wrong about that. Oh, you're asleep? I'm asleep. Let's see. Should we update anything?
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Well, this just happened on Twitter as we were like in between one recording and another.
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I looked down at my Twitter and somebody had written, have you heard about the New Hampshire murder castle?
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You guys have to talk about it. So I immediately send back a message saying, what are you talking about in all caps?
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because I was like, there's another murder castle. Like, how do I not know about this?
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And then he wrote back, yeah, H.H. Holmes. And I was like, that's Chicago. God damn it.
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But then he started laughing and was like, oh my God, you're right. But apparently H.H. Holmes is from New Hampshire.
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He was probably just either flipped it or was at the beginning of the story. He was at the beginning of the book about H.H. Holmes.
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That's actually one of the funniest ones that people ask us about. Like, if we know, do we know H.H. Holmes?
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And it's like that one is just like, it's like asking us if you know about Ted Bundy.
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Yeah. Or like, have you ever eaten at McDonald's? It's like, yeah, I really do. They're amazing chicken.
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They're filet of fish. Not to be, you know, anything about it except for how do you, the guy built a murder castle.
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You got to know if you're even slightly interested in true crime. If like Leonardo DiCaprio is even thought about as a main character in this movie, which he is, like we've probably heard about it.
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I would say. Who do you think would play Ted Bundy? Well, Greg Kinnear pops to mind.
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Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you, guys. Did you come up with that? I did just now.
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I've never thought about that before. Dude, no. I was like, I can't think of anyone.
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That is perfect. Because he's kind of got dead eyes. And he kind of is charmed. Like he's not hot enough to be like hot charming,
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but he's like charming enough to be like hot because he's charming. You trust that face.
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Yeah. We just have to dye the hair. And he could become a little, like the eyebrows need to get a little more pointed.
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Yeah. He has to get a little more sinister and probably a little skinnier. Yeah.
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But that guy in like a cable knit sweater, it was like, please help me to my Volkswagen that doesn't have a passenger seat in it.
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You're fucking Greg Kinnear. You're getting in there. Dude. What do you got? The show is called high maintenance.
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That wasn't even close to what I fucking deadbeat is the one where the guy's roommate was a ghost.
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Jesus Christ. From what? Oh my God. I've heard of high maintenance. I've heard it's really good.
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Okay. High maintenance. High maintenance. is what we're trying to say. Yes, and the episode is called Grandpa,
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and it says, when Chasen and his sensitive yet fun-loving dog Gatsby move from the suburban Midwest to Queens,
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culture shock takes its toll until they cross paths with Beth, a cute, whimsical dog walker.
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Yeah, ale. Yeah, ale. But this episode has nothing to do with the season. It's like,
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the whole show is about this dude, high maintenance, who sells pot on his bike. And then there's this random dog episode,
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and he's like, the guy's in it but he's not the episode isn't about him and it's just such a gorgeous listen
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everyone has been fucking commenting and being like thank you for recommending fleabag it was
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amazing so fucking trust me right now please they do i know are you yelling at me no i'm yelling at
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the fucking universe that wrong so wrong uh anyway you know i bet you like fleabag and then deadbeat
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almost seems like the beat in between high maintenance and fleabag deadbeat goes right in
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there high maintenance uh or i just want to know who makes that show that they can go to fucking
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hbo and say you don't get to give us i think that they don't care like i think that they're not
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i don't know like someone i knew who's really cool who makes documentaries was friends with them
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and they don't give a shit but who is it it's a husband and wife team ben sinclair and katya
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leachfeld. Huh. So they're like, fuck you, dude. We're fucking good. Yeah. It usually doesn't work
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that way. That's what I'm saying. No. So that's very cool. You'll cry. You know who else did that?
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Who? All of the people who would be, I believe, James Burroughs, Matt Groening, everybody who said
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they were going to make The Simpsons They went to Fox and said we make this but you don get to give us notes Like who were they All they had done is the Tracy Allman show at that point right No no no James Burroughs he like a legend right Like they had basically yeah they basically said we make this deal with you and all that but you just can
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They won't do that again. They won't. Until my favorite murder, the comedy TV show.
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That's also a game show. That's what it's called. Comes out and we're like, you can't tell us what to do.
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And they're like, great, we're not giving you a TV show. Fine. Fine, go ahead. sink your goddamn boat we got a podcast oh you know what we even mentioned is that this is the
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first fucking episode in my new apartment yeah that's right that's what we should be talking
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with that and how high these ceilings are yes this is cathedral-esque i mean you'd think that
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if they were gonna make ceilings this high they would also not make them fucking popcorn but i
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guess i'm not an architect so i don't know but however look you can you can take that out you
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can scrape it off you know how much that costs so much money i know oh um i was just trying to
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make you feel better thank you but i don't care it's fine it looks great you know they're so high
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up you can't see it okay yes popcorn ceiling and venetian blinds kill me but i'm not uh what are
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they called what are those called yeah i think those are like horizontal or vertical blinds
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vertical well anyways i hate them but otherwise this apartment is amazing this is a great
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apartment yeah right yeah and also you just moved here you do you're like you gotta get in and get
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This is the nicest place I've ever lived in my life. It's great. It's really fun.
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It's got a good open floor plan. Yeah. Good vibes. When the apocalypse comes, we're on the third floor.
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So like we're safe. The water coming up, the people scratching at the side of the building, you're safe.
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Oh, it's good. All right. That's good. Oh, I forgot to mention this last week when it mattered, when it had any fucking.
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All right. So these two dudes who are, who were into the podcast, uh, message Justin, we're like,
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Hey, we're super in the podcast. We're writing it. We are writers on the show. The real O'Neills.
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Will you guys be in an episode? And Karen was like, I have a day job and have a fucking normal life.
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And I was like, I don't, I'll be on it. And so I went on and was on it and it's, it's on tonight, which is two days after this is
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going to air two days. Yeah. Before you will be two days after. in hearing this.
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But you can watch it online places. That's right. So it's these fucking sweet angels,
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Josh Kirby and John Vellis, who like they wore, so we recorded this thing and they wore my favorite murder shirts
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to the fucking recording of this episode. Like there was a ton of people on set and they, every time someone would meet me
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and like I was an extra on to, like they didn't have to be nice to me. And they were like, she has a pocket.
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Like they were so nice and wonderful people. And one of them was fucking Henry Zabrowski's college roommate,
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which is so insane. Anyways, I'm on it in a fucking dance sequence and I get my baby stolen and it's fun.
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If you want to watch it, check it out. Go watch Georgia. The Orpheum this Saturday.
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That's right. That should be exciting. The LA Riot Fest Comedy Festival and we're at the Orpheum Theater.
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Should we put it up next week? If it doesn't suck? Yes. that should be the that should be the bar
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if we can have a week off we should try so hard on Saturday so we can have a week off
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actually yes let's try really hard because I need a week off because work is getting insane
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are you about to start filming? the week after yeah oh god so you're like twisting all the knobs
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what do they call it? yeah we're gonna twist some knobs and we're gonna push some levers up
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and then pull them back down all that stuff which is really hard for me the stuff I don't like the most.
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You can't even chew gum and chew gum at the same time. It's the worst. Should we, when should like, let's,
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I was thinking that we could have Guy back on, Guy Brennan back on whose show you're currently on.
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Right. But what if we like have people write in and ask their legal questions that they're curious about?
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Like, what the fuck is this thing and that thing? Like you have to write it in that sentence.
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And then he's like, yeah, I don't know. I don't know what those things are. Yeah.
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Okay. Oh, no, no, no. I was just trying to make a joke. I don't know. Yeah. I think, yeah, if we had something specific and like led it through to a certain topic.
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Okay. We should have him back on them because that was a good episode. No, he's great.
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Very good. And then it's like just kind of a fun, it's fun to have its third person.
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Yeah. And not tell horrifying murder stories. Hey, speaking of. Hey. Is there anything else you want to?
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But wait, you have a story about your Uber driver. dude i need to write shit down dude oh my god let's start over let me start with this
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uh thank you for reminding me no that's why i write things on my list my therapist today i was
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like what do i what's wrong with my memory and she was like well you're sleep deprived and anxious
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those will fuck with your memory i'm like okay i feel good about it but now i don't feel good about
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it okay so we were i was i got an uber to go to our cracked podcast live show at ucb which i think
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they're gonna put up soon um which was so much fucking fun and crack podcasts they're like awesome
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dudes so on my way there like dude to do i get picked up i fucking first i'm leaving a party and
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i shame vince and joe de rosa for like saying goodbye and like leaving me there to wait for an
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uber i don't know why i'm saying that i'm just shaming them so i get picked up by this dude who
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looks like he could murder me but he ended up being super fucking cool he looks like he goes
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he looks like he goes outside of burning man you know what i mean like he stays near like he stays
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near real real outsider yeah like he can't afford tickets and he like sells drugs outside of burning
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man but he but like i feel safest around those people more than like normal people those are
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your people. Yeah, sure. The burning event outside people Yeah So he like so what are you going to UCB for And like chitty chat the way I hate Ubers do And then I was like oh you know I just I have this
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podcast and he was like, what is it about? I'm like, oh, murder. And, you know, it kind of like
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slowly got some out of it. And then he was like, oh, hey, uh, what's funny. I, I grew up a couple
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doors down from John Wayne Gacy. So I was like, wait, what? And I was like, right around the time.
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He's like, uh-huh. I went to a party where my friend had him as a clown at our party.
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Wait, he was a kid? He was a kid. His friend hired John Wayne Gacy to be a clown.
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Pogo the Clown. Pogo the Clown at his birthday party. And he said that, yeah, he, like, John Wayne Gacy would come to their school and watch wrestling matches.
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And I was like, well, wasn't it weird? And he was like, yeah, everyone knew it was weird that this guy was into it, but he would then bring them back to his house and his wife.
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And I was like, wait, he had a wife? He's like, yeah. Yeah, yeah. He would bring them down.
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And then what you've told me before is how he would be like, let's have this wrestling thing.
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I'm going to put you in handcuffs. Yeah. He knew all that because that happened to people in his town.
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And his wife would just be like, oh, he brought these kids down with him and they never came back up.
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Whatever. Yeah, that's the wife that eventually left him because that kept happening.
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And she's just like, this is so weird. she wasn't like calling the cops she was just like goodbye she didn't know what was going on
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down there it was just kind of like it's voice someone with not not like knowing what's going on
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oh yeah it was the 70s i think people did that all the time in their marriages like we're gonna
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go have man time in our man cave downstairs and she's like okay i'm going to bed but with children
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like if she was suspicious enough to leave him she should have told the cops of her suspicions
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I can't speak to this at all I don't know anyways so yeah like on my way to a shoulda woulda coulda
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you know what I mean like should have not married him to be a you're married a clown look listen
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look and listen look learn the handcuffs alone get out of there like no the going to wrestling
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matches and having kids over for wrestling alone like if they started doing that I'd be like well
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this isn't gonna this will not stand you're going to prison you'd be like one hand on the hip hey
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listen, mister. Yeah. Goodbye. Nine one one on the other hand. Well, that's awesome. I mean,
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that's the magic of, uh, getting into just anyone's car. Try it. Everyone give it a shot.
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That's why we have this podcast is getting into people's cars. It was kind of funny though,
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because on my way, of course, Georgia got there before me cause I was late and on my way, I was
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texting like I'm on my way here, whatever. And then Georgia texts my Uber driver used to live
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across the street from John Wayne Gacy. And then I was like, you are lying. And I just,
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all my responses were accusing her of being a liar. Like I make shit up all the time.
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I just wouldn't accept it. This is not the truth. And I was like, I'm not fucking kidding.
00:20:58
The other thing I was going to say is, and I want to say that I was trying to look up the name,
00:21:03
but I realized I was being rude to you. So I just put my phone down, but I'm, I want to say her name
00:21:08
is Marjorie. I don't think that's right though. But we have a person who listens to our podcast
00:21:15
and also who comes to mine and April's improv lab show every month, which we really appreciate
00:21:22
because God knows you don't want an empty room at the improv lab. It's a real good time. But
00:21:27
anyway, there's a girl that I met there on our first business class and who was like,
00:21:32
love the podcast, blah, blah, blah. And has come been super supportive. Well, I walked in
00:21:37
to the last show we did and there's like kind of an entranceway at the improv where people stand
00:21:44
around smoke and talk or whatever. And she was just sitting at a table with her friends. And just
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as I walked by, she just held out her hand and held and handed me three decks of cards. So I stopped
00:21:54
and I was like, Hey, what's going on? And then I look and they're the, they're the cold case cards
00:21:58
that we were talking about on the podcast. Um, and she got them for us. Um, we all got a pack
00:22:05
and it's, we got two Florida's in a Connecticut, I believe. Um, they're the cards, excuse me.
00:22:13
They're the cards that the law enforcement would, like deck of cards, playing cards that the law enforcement would give to inmates to play cards with.
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But there would also be cold cases of like murders and all these things on each one.
00:22:30
Like explaining them, hoping that one of the people in prison would recognize them or feel like impelled.
00:22:37
Impelled? Compelled. Thank you. In prison and compelled. I just made those into one word.
00:22:42
You just combined it. To talk. Which was a good idea. Right. And when you look at them, it's kind of creepy, but then it's also fascinating.
00:22:50
Like you just want to look at every single card. Sorry, Steven just handed me her name and it is Miranda.
00:22:55
Same thing. Miranda. What did I say? Like Miranda writes. Maribel, some horrible thing.
00:23:01
Miranda, thank you so much for thinking of us and getting the thing that we were so excited
00:23:07
to even talk about. Yeah, no, it's super cool. It was basically, this is like the partner item to the murder cards that we were, the baseball cards that we were looking at that Stephen got for us for Christmas.
00:23:17
I mean, we're just going to keep fucking compiling cards. We just love cards. Hallmark.
00:23:26
That's it. Chip. Yep. Cards. Yeah. All right. That's all our business, right? I think so.
00:23:31
Has it been 45 minutes yet? We got to hit that mark. Cut half that out, Stephen.
00:23:39
Okay, we are back. I mean, it's like the true crime loop that we're always in, where I'm referencing, like, you know, Greg Kinnear needs to play Ted Bundy.
00:23:50
Right. Since that time, Zac Efron has played Ted Bundy. I still think that Greg Kinnear would have been a great contender.
00:24:00
because he's so like, his face gives you a softness, a soft feeling. He has like the kind eyes and the kind of tented eyebrows of a like concerned Christian man.
00:24:13
Yeah, which is like not to say that Ted Bundy did, but I think that would get across the point,
00:24:19
which is he was a wolf in sheep's clothing. Yes. And Zac Efron did a great job, but he definitely just like, he played more wolf than sheep, I felt.
00:24:28
Yeah, because he's Zac Efron was hot from age eight, which I am sorry to say, but it's like the reason that we know about him is I know that's very questionable.
00:24:38
But let's do an immediate corrections corner. I shouldn't have said that. But what I'm saying is it's like a vibe and the vibe has to be I will not hurt you.
00:24:50
That's the problem with Ted Bundy is he came off as the Fair Isle sweater, caring, concerned.
00:24:56
I'm volunteering for a suicide hotline. Totally. I'm doing the dishes after your party for you.
00:25:03
No one suspects me, even when they're a female cop who works alongside you and hears that it's a guy in a yellow bug.
00:25:12
Right. And our girl, Ann Rule, was like, can't be my friend, Ted. No way. Cannot be him.
00:25:17
I mean, it's a really good point, too, because, like, the hotter the actor playing Ted Bundy is, the easier you're like, of course she went with him.
00:25:25
He's hot. But Ted Bundy wasn't hot. It wasn't like that. It wasn't like that. I want to see it as like how we convince ourselves that everything is fine because this person doesn't seem threatening.
00:25:39
I do think that Greg Kinnear going in that direction would be really interesting.
00:25:43
That kind of actor. Just maybe an unknown, you know, an unknown. Or, you know, in 10 years, we'll get a chance to do this again.
00:25:51
And we'll pull old Kinnear out of the mop balls because I think he is like semi-retired.
00:25:57
I think he is the kind of person that would be done with Hollywood even better for that kind of casting.
00:26:02
Where it's like, just he wants nothing to do with the trappings of fame. Great, get in here because that's the vibe behind this guy.
00:26:10
Sudden Greg Kinnear. Yeah, you're like, this guy, my parents would love him. That's the trick of fucking Ted Bundy.
00:26:17
Totally. The promise of when you think you've got the best boyfriend and he is the literal devil.
00:26:24
That's exactly it. Okay. That's amazing. Okay. So we're in my fucking pod loft for the first time.
00:26:29
I mean, do you remember getting that apartment and what I remember how excited you were,
00:26:35
but I don't want to speak for you. What was that transition like for you? Yeah, it was really wild. Vince and I stayed at our original apartment and I stayed there
00:26:43
before I met him longer than I necessarily needed the rent control for. Yeah. Like that's
00:26:49
originally why I moved in. I could afford it without the boyfriend I had been seeing at the
00:26:54
time. And so I was like, this is the only apartment I can afford without him because,
00:26:59
you know, things were going okay with the cooking channel stuff. So when we just waited,
00:27:03
it was that feeling of like, okay, we have some money and some savings now and Vince has a good
00:27:07
job and everything, but it could all come crashing down. Let's not get rid of this apartment.
00:27:12
Yes. It was like, I think like $12.50 a month rent controlled. So like stepping up and getting
00:27:19
that apartment, which was like the nicest apartment either of us have ever lived in.
00:27:23
Yeah. It had like all the trappings it had. Like it was like modern. Yes. It was cool.
00:27:29
And air conditioning and a dishwasher and like down the hall were like multiple laundry facilities.
00:27:35
There was a pool. Elevator. Complex. There was an elevator. There was a trash chute. High ceilings.
00:27:41
high popcorn ceilings but it was very exciting I think for both of us to be like experiencing
00:27:47
it felt like the first material thing that I could show for the success of the podcast and it was very
00:27:52
very exciting very exciting it was what I like to call the Jefferson's effect where you were moving
00:27:58
on up and you actually were like this isn't it's not like what we all do which is like you roll the
00:28:03
dice you use a credit card who knows what's going to happen instead you were like I'm going to be as
00:28:08
careful as possible and I still get to make this move. Right. Right. Like it won't be the end of
00:28:14
the world if we have to like downsize again. Yes. Yeah. It won't be. You won't be totally fucked,
00:28:19
but you also aren't really rolling the dice in a real way. Also, if you want to see George's
00:28:24
apartment in the downstairs, because I think there's plenty of pictures of the pod loft.
00:28:28
But when we did that Entertainment Weekly spread, the whole photo shoot was in the downstairs of
00:28:34
George's apartment. Right. Right. And then I also want to give a shout out to Josh Kirby and John
00:28:39
Veleys for putting me on the real O'Neill's, the show they were, they like wrote us apart and you
00:28:46
couldn't do it. And I was like, well, I'm doing it. Yeah. And it was just so much fun and they
00:28:51
were so sweet and they ended up casting me in another thing when they were then writing on
00:28:56
Fresh Off the Boat. So they've just been really, they're like my uncles. They've just, even though
00:29:00
I'm older than them, I think they've just been really supportive. Yeah. That's really nice. I
00:29:04
I remember that was I was still on baskets, I think, at that point. And I was like, you were like, hey, we could do this thing.
00:29:13
And I'm like, I can't, though. I can't do another job. I can't do another job. And also, I understand why you're excited.
00:29:20
I literally spent all of the 90s on Fen Fen trying to do this. I never want to go back.
00:29:25
It was so exciting for me because I had done it in the 90s as in early 2000s as a background
00:29:32
actor, which you just get treated like cattle. It's really fun, but you are almost a waste of
00:29:37
space until they yell action. So going on there as like a person with a line and a little part,
00:29:44
like I got to be put in a trailer. I got an omelet. Like I'll never forget when I was an extra
00:29:51
and I didn have money for food So you go on you be there like 14 hours a day and you eat the craft services but the craft services for the extras was not great And I remember going to crack a hard egg and peel it and just the whole all the whites peeled off completely with the shell
00:30:09
It was so depressing in a weird way. You peeled an egg down to the hardened yolk?
00:30:14
Because it was so poorly boiled and so cheaply bought that... How would you do that on the Food Network?
00:30:22
well this is depressing like this is sad this makes me sad you know as i crack what i thought
00:30:31
was the shell of this hard-boiled egg the white comes off as well the entire thing just and i'm
00:30:38
left with a chalky yellow globe yeah that was and so i got an omelet and it just kind of felt
00:30:45
like full circle because they actually like when you are a member of the cast when you have a line
00:30:52
the the craft service people are like what would you like anything you'd like you can have anything
00:30:58
and yeah that was willy wonka shit and the inside sad yellow yolk chalky yolk to a beautiful omelet
00:31:06
you truly had really that is i truly had that's a metaphor okay should we do we get into the main
00:31:13
the stories of this episode georgia goes first on this episode this is her story about how the amber
00:31:21
alert system was founded. I think you're first. All right. Right? I'm going to take it.
00:31:33
I'm going to fucking take it. Take it and do it. Limit. Love it. Limit. To the limit.
00:31:41
Close time. Remember close time? Yes. What was the theme? Can you think of the tune?
00:31:48
Yes. Hold on. Because my mom worked there for a while. Wait. We start it. Something, something.
00:31:54
Uh, I went to see the golden girls live, which is Drew Drogy, Jackie B, Sam Pancake,
00:32:00
Sherry Vine. Unbelievable word for word reenactments of golden girls episodes. I see it on Instagram, but I don't know what it is.
00:32:07
You have to go. It's so funny. I told Joe DeRozza about it because he is obsessed with the golden girls.
00:32:11
Oh my God. And he was like so mad that he had gone. But HL and Scott, he has a golden girls podcast.
00:32:16
Have you met him? He's the best. No. You got to bring him. but in between the scenes they go to real like mid-80s commercials and so there was the shasta
00:32:27
commercial i want a pub i want a shasta there were all these commercials remember the bubble gum
00:32:34
one with two twins double bubble double mint double mint gum it's a statement of the great
00:32:41
from double and come close I can't remember close time is because my mom worked for them
00:32:48
and they had this commercial where the like cute hot model would walk out and like kick her leg and
00:32:55
like keep walking I was like close time and so my mom told like came home crying it was like I was
00:33:02
walking out of a meeting and I tried to do like close time kick like as a cute joke to end it and
00:33:07
She's like, put my skirt caught and her skirt was too tight. And she just kicked both of her legs out.
00:33:14
And fell down. Oh no. That's such a Georgia move. So I cannot think of close time without my mom kicking her fucking legs out.
00:33:25
Close time is like the place where we beg my mom to take us. To get shoulder pads.
00:33:31
She would be exhausted from work. And we'd be like, I just need one shirt. And you'd want to like shop the whole store.
00:33:37
and my mom would be like five more minutes and like going crazy cheap hangers and these like sad
00:33:42
metal fucking racks and nothing ever fit me everything was too small where i'd be like i
00:33:47
want these tiny pants but i couldn't wear anything for us that was mimi's cafe and my mom would order
00:33:51
a fucking glass of wine from the poor fucking uh hostess who couldn't serve wine and just sit in
00:33:58
the fucking waiting area oh what waiting for a table just chug wine cool moms anyway oh wow where
00:34:06
are we? What's happening? Has it been 45 minutes yet? Okay, great. We're almost there. I'm about
00:34:10
to blow my nose on my shirt. Really? Can you guys confirm? Can you confirm? I don't have a tissue.
00:34:21
Can everyone confirm that that was on my shirt? I don't have a tissue. It's okay. She doesn't give
00:34:28
a fuck. It was either my shirt or my cat that was on my lap when I chose my shirt. All right.
00:34:35
all right all right here we go all right so remember first time and we'll take it too but no
00:34:42
not the same thing not the same thing all right so uh last week i talked about uh megan's your serious voice
00:34:56
with clearly i'm about to there's a cross-eyed cat staring at me the whole time um, Megan's law talked about that. Right. So then I was like, Hey, what's another one of those that
00:35:08
like, we don't know the history of. So, so January 17th in 1996, which is exactly 21 years ago today.
00:35:20
Um, so nine-year-old Amber Hagerman is riding her bike in the parking lot of an abandoned
00:35:26
Winn-Dixie in Arlington, Texas, and she's with her five-year-old brother. Have you been to a
00:35:32
Winn-Dixie? No. I haven't. Have you been in an abandoned parking lot? Kind of, but just the idea
00:35:39
of it, it simply would not happen. Today? Not since 95. I feel like this idea of children alone
00:35:48
anywhere. Even 96 seems like too... I think that it took a lot of small towns a while to catch up.
00:35:54
Right because people thought oh no not here And it safe here and that stuff But like these days Never Never They wouldn allow people like children in an abandoned parking lot they would like someone would lock it off
00:36:06
Right. Or like you wouldn't be able to get on. But also anyone passing by would call the police.
00:36:09
If there was two, a five-year-old and a seven-year-old riding their bikes, it would be like a major.
00:36:14
Okay. Well, here's why. Yeah. But here's, okay. So there were about two blocks from their grandma's house.
00:36:20
It was broad fucking daylight. And someone drives into the parking lot. grabs Amber off of her bicycle.
00:36:28
Like they didn't even try to like, he just grabs her and drives her away in his black pickup truck.
00:36:35
There's one witness to step forward and he was a neighbor. His name was Jim Cavell.
00:36:41
He's a 78 year old retiree, witnesses the whole thing and calls the police right away.
00:36:46
And he says, she was by herself. I saw this pickup. He pulled up, jumped out and grabbed her.
00:36:52
When she screamed, I figured the police ought to know about it. So I called them. That's so fucking Arlington, Texas.
00:36:58
Like, well, figured the cops should know. He was nearby. And so he, this is how he described the
00:37:07
person that he was a white or Hispanic male, 25 to 40, under six feet tall, medium build, driving a
00:37:13
late 1980s or early 1990s model full-size American-made black truck. And then, so Amber's
00:37:23
brother Ricky goes home, tells his parents what happened. They're freaking out. In the abandoned
00:37:29
parking lot of the Winn-Dixie, there's also a laundromat. And I guess it was full of customers,
00:37:38
but police thought that a lot of them were in the country illegally. And so when the cops
00:37:42
fucking swarmed they got the fuck out of there yeah um and there was a truck that was similar
00:37:49
to that of the kidnapper spotted outside before she was taken outside of the laundromat
00:37:55
but no one ever came forward and said that they know who it was and there was a $75,000 reward
00:38:02
that also had the promise that they wouldn't be deported if they came forward with information but
00:38:07
no one ever came forward. There's a huge search. And then four days later, a security guard who's
00:38:15
walking his dog late at night stumbles upon the nude body of Amber. She's in a creek behind an
00:38:23
apartment complex, which is less than five miles from the grocery store parking lot.
00:38:29
um amber only has on a sock on her right foot and uh an autopsy reveals that her kidnapper had
00:38:40
kept her alive for two days and she was beaten and sexually assaulted and then her throat was
00:38:46
slashed and she was dumped behind the apartment complex which like makes you think that he lived
00:38:51
there or at least knew someone who lived there and was staying in town and had some time alone
00:38:57
Like, I don't think it would be someone who actually lives there because it's too obvious.
00:39:01
Yeah. It wouldn't make a lot of sense. Yeah. Like you're staying at your back door.
00:39:04
Right. You're staying at your brother-in-law's apartment while he's out of town.
00:39:10
And yeah. So after the funeral, a woman named Diana Simone, she's just a random woman.
00:39:18
She's a massage therapist and a mother. And she's from Dallas. And she fucking calls the radio station.
00:39:23
And she's like, hey, if you guys can alert the public to severe weather, why the fuck can't you do the same thing for when children are abducted?
00:39:33
She's just like, put some shit together. And she's like, what the fuck? Yeah. Wait, say her name again.
00:39:38
Her name is Diana Simone. Yeah. So she's a badass motherfucker. And she says, and I wish I could do this in a fucking Dallas accent, but I don't want to be insulting.
00:39:49
that she says they're saying Amber was taken at four o'clock in the afternoon, thrown in a pickup
00:39:54
truck and driven somewhere and that nobody saw anything. And then she says, I'm sorry, that's not
00:40:00
possible. The problem was not that people didn't see them. It's that they didn't know what they
00:40:05
were seeing. Yeah. So nine months after Amber's death, radio stations and law enforcement officials
00:40:11
in North Texas launch what they call America's Missing Broadcast Emergency Response or
00:40:18
Amber Alerts. They relay reports of kidnappings to the public. It's an emergency response system
00:40:26
that disseminates information about a missing person, usually a child by media broadcasting
00:40:33
or electronic Broadway signs. As of December 23rd, 2015, there have been 800 children rescued and
00:40:41
returned specifically because of Amber Alert. But unfortunately, Amber Hagerman's abduction
00:40:48
murder has never been solved oh no i know um and her mom's amber's mom says i know amber would be
00:40:54
very proud of the of this she was always another mommy to all my children but i also want people
00:41:00
to remember amber that she had to sacrifice her life for amber alert so like mom isn't like
00:41:05
you know empowered and proud of this shit she's fucking she's it's bittersweet for her you know
00:41:13
Like why did her, why did her daughter have to be the fucking namesake of this? Her child died.
00:41:18
Yeah. So sad. All right. So it's never been solved, but after I did some like sleuthing, uh, the thing I found
00:41:25
that the only, the only like connection to an actual person that could possibly be involved
00:41:29
that I found, um, was okay. So in 2010, DNA identified a man that 25 years ago had kidnapped, sexually assaulted, and slit the throat of eight-year-old Jennifer Shewitt.
00:41:51
And Jennifer survived. Wow. And I wrote and kicked major ass at healing and working on herself She made it her life mission to speak out on behalf of victims After her Jennifer attack she lay dying in this fucking field of hurt
00:42:07
That's when I survived. Yep. Have you seen her with the pink? She's got like pink hair and she's kind of like punk and goth.
00:42:12
And the guy took her out of her bedroom through the window? Oh, dude. And I know.
00:42:17
Okay. She, I mean, this chick is like the epitome of like, here's how you get back your life.
00:42:23
Yeah, big time. She's amazing. Yes. So she was in the field at eight years old for 12 hours before she was discovered.
00:42:31
And in her hospital bed, she had to scribble notes to the police. And she said that her attacker said his name was Dennis.
00:42:39
And she did this amazing sketch. Like she was fucking on it. And in it, she was like, I knew I was going to die.
00:42:46
And I was going to get every little information, like bit of information burned into my head.
00:42:50
and it turns out that the dude was a 40-year-old welder from north little rock arkansas he had a
00:42:59
wife and three kids and his dna was on file because he had been like he has a fucking rap
00:43:06
sheet of assaulting and kidnapping women there's a ghost train going by my fucking new apartment okay
00:43:14
um so he had been he had been you know the normal arrested for rape and assault and only got this
00:43:25
many months and in one case a weekend in prison for for rape for it got you know bargained down
00:43:34
to pled down to like you know bullshit stuff so he had never actually been really
00:43:41
convicted of kidnapping blah blah blah uh he confesses to kidnapping raping and trying to
00:43:48
kill jennifer eschewitt um her body was she was lying naked on her back on top of a fire ant nest
00:43:59
14 hours later she woke up covered in fire ants she couldn't move she tried to scream
00:44:05
something about the fire ants that kept her alive and i don't know i don't remember what it is i
00:44:09
I think if I'm remembering this correctly, because this is another one that's like crazy.
00:44:14
I survived. If you can see it, she's one of those people, like you said, the way she talks about it,
00:44:19
you're like badass. Yeah. Like there's a, you know, there's something inside of you.
00:44:24
When you're losing a lot of blood, you're not supposed to go to sleep. Like, so you don't lose consciousness.
00:44:29
And I think they kept her awake. Oh my God. No, no, no. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure you should watch her.
00:44:36
I survived. look up Jennifer and whatever city in Texas this is because she tells the story it's chilling yeah
00:44:42
yeah okay um so she's so he gets arrested uh for all of this which is so similar
00:44:52
and this was in uh in Texas and she had been kidnapped from a Texas apartment so I mean it's so similar I'm I don't think they have DNA from Amber's body so there's really no
00:45:06
way to tie it together. And unfortunately this motherfucking dick sucker killed himself in 2010.
00:45:14
But he had confessed and she says, you chose the wrong little 45 pound eight year old girl to try
00:45:22
and murder. Because for 19 years, I've thought of you every single day and help search for you.
00:45:28
And every year that's passed has given me more strength and drive for when I finally would be
00:45:32
face to face with you as I am today in his sentence, she said. But motherfucking Bradford
00:45:37
hanged himself in his cell. And that's it. I mean. So he went to jail for that attack.
00:45:45
He did. Oh, that's good. And he killed himself. Yeah. So, I mean, it's just such a similar, an eight-year-old girl that he kidnapped.
00:45:53
Yeah. Slit her throat, left her for dead. This one happened to survive in Texas, you know, in
00:46:01
the 90s it's just so amber another like person who's done a lot but at the expense of their life
00:46:10
he looked bummed what's that he looked bummed yeah yeah it's a bummer it is a bummer but i think
00:46:18
it's an important story yeah and it's horrifying that he was never found like what the fuck well
00:46:26
I was really surprised that you said that because that, that I know of that little girl because of Amber Alerts. And so I just completely assumed that that was a fully like a case that came all the way around and that there was a prosecution for it. And that was part of it.
00:46:42
That one in Megan's Law, it's like they're more horrifying than you would expect them to be.
00:46:50
And they've done a lot, but it's just so heartbreaking. Yeah. It's so awful. Awful.
00:46:57
But we should also know about it. And honestly, like I, when I got my cell phone, I like turned off the Amber Alert.
00:47:03
You can turn off the like emergency alerts on your phone. And it made me want to turn mine back on.
00:47:08
Because like. We'll do it. I am. I'm going to. Like, what if you fucking see a fucking, you know.
00:47:15
Well, and also what's the problem, you know. Yeah. What does it take? It's not, it's not like interfering with your life or whatever.
00:47:22
And it's just, they had so much information to go on based on that track that, you know.
00:47:28
If there was a system set up. They didn't find her. Yeah. Is scary. And I feel like someone knows their brother-in-law or ex-brother-in-law or cousin or uncle.
00:47:39
you know is suspicious but don't want to come forward yeah like it's always that you know yeah
00:47:46
or your other guy yeah but someone yeah yeah yeah well that's a good one yeah okay that was a very very tough story
00:48:00
Do you have updates for it? I do. I have some updates. Unfortunately, Amber Hagerman's murder remains unsolved.
00:48:07
In the three decades since Amber's abduction, police have received over 7,000 tips.
00:48:13
Arlington Police Sergeant Grant Gilden told People magazine that they continue to receive leads,
00:48:19
several of which they investigate extensively. It's also never been considered a cold case, as it's never gone 180 days without a lead coming in,
00:48:28
which I guess is what they classify a cold case on. I do wish they would, I mean, maybe they could release more evidence,
00:48:35
another little piece of the puzzle. So someone out there might put it together, but I am not in law enforcement.
00:48:42
Also, I would be very interested, I bet you, just knowing the online sleuthing world
00:48:48
and the way people dedicate themselves to specific cases, I bet you there is a solid group of online sleuths who are trying,
00:48:56
who are probably the ones that are calling in with that new information or trying to push that cold case forward.
00:49:02
But if you gave them one more little piece of the puzzle, like it reminds me of Michelle McNamara's book, I'll Be Gone in the Dark.
00:49:08
She sent away for some cufflinks that she found at a thrift store online that sounded like a pair of cufflinks that had been stolen from one of the victims' houses.
00:49:20
Like that kind of thing is so intricate and interesting. And I just, you know, I think there's a lot of those out there that could be helped with stuff like that.
00:49:29
Yeah, for sure. So Gilden believes the killer is still alive and police remain hopeful that recent advancements in DNA testing and new tips from the public will help solve the case.
00:49:38
Amber's mother, Donna Williams, still lives in Texas and she's a child safety advocate.
00:49:42
Today, Amber Alerts are used in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, parts of Indian country, Puerto Rico, the U.S., Virgin Islands, and over 45 countries.
00:49:52
And yes, I put it on my phone finally. So rest assured. Great. Yeah. I mean, that deep tragedy that then begins to represent advocation for missing children and children at risk is a beautiful, you know, kind of testament to Amber's mother's work.
00:50:12
Definitely. And it's just, I'll never forget that the woman who called into the radio station
00:50:17
and said, we get alerts about weather. There has to be a system for missing children. And like,
00:50:24
what a simple idea. That's just a huge revelation. What an incredible legacy to have.
00:50:30
Also, and then now there's also silver alerts, which I get on my phone when people with dementia
00:50:35
walk away from their houses, which is really important. That happens a lot. And that legacy
00:50:41
grows with that kind of like looking out for each other, an organized looking out for each other.
00:50:46
It's beautiful. Absolutely. And so also according to the National Center for Missing and Exploited
00:50:50
Children, as of December 31st, 2024, this past December, at least 1,268 children have been
00:50:58
recovered due to the activation of an Amber Alert. So amazing. The legacy is there. Yeah, that's huge.
00:51:04
All right. Let's get into Karen's awful, awful story about Luca Magnata. Well, mine is super gross and upsetting.
00:51:22
But I feel like it's always a tiny bit better when it's not a child murder. Yeah.
00:51:29
Right? Those are the ones that just get us. I'm sorry. I know, but I think they're important.
00:51:33
Of course. I mean, it's horrifying. There's no like, what? Yes, they're definitely important.
00:51:40
I'm apologizing because, because it's like, it's hard. It's a hard thing to talk about in here.
00:51:46
So this one is, we have gotten so many tweets about it and so many requests to do this one
00:51:51
that I was like, who the fuck is this guy that people keep on being like, how could you not have done this yet?
00:51:58
And so I started looking into it and there are so many, it is so detailed that what I did was tapped old Sarge Morris.
00:52:06
No, you didn't. And I was like, can you help me do research? yeah girl that's not gonna make any sense until the week after this episode i don't care and by
00:52:15
then it's gonna have caught like wildfire sarge morris over here so that's awesome uh yeah so this
00:52:22
is um this is steven a morris's research uh but it's such a good story and it's super intense
00:52:30
it's the story of luca magnata the canadian yes dude dude dude tell me everything we always think
00:52:40
the Canadians are so chill. Sweet angels. With their maple syrup and their flags. Yeah. But
00:52:46
not this specific one who was born Eric Clinton Kirk Newman on July 24th, 1982 in Scarborough,
00:52:55
Ontario. Um, when he was 21, not, don't, we don't know that much about his childhood,
00:53:01
but when he was 21, we know that he started stripping in a Toronto club and appearing in
00:53:07
low budget gay porn. So not a glamorous life. And that was in 2003 and 2004. He was convicted of impersonation and fraud after he befriended a mentally incapacitated
00:53:21
21 year old woman, applied for credit cards in her name and charged up $10,000 in fees.
00:53:29
So this guy's got some fucking straight off the 21 year old bat ish use. Issues.
00:53:36
Issues. Some serious issues. Okay. I would say narcissism was going to be in there at some point.
00:53:43
Sociopathy? Perhaps a sociops. Let's throw them all in there. So before he was sentenced to nine months of community service and 12 months probation,
00:53:54
his lawyer actually showed the court a medical record claiming that he had significant psychiatric issues Wow I want to read those reports so bad I know like details Yeah I like some
00:54:06
psychologist is sitting there in a fucking room with him and they're like, Oh shit. I'm going to
00:54:11
underline significant. Yeah. This person just like tried to get some money off a person, but
00:54:15
this motherfucker is like, this motherfucker is manipulating mentally handicapped people to get
00:54:24
credit cards. And has like, yes. Okay. That's enough. So this is just, we're laying down a
00:54:29
base coat. It's like when you do your nails. This is the primer. This is like when you're making
00:54:35
something and you put in the, what's the thing with the, you know, the carrots and the celery
00:54:41
and the... A roux. A roux is the like sauce. No, you're right. Listen, I have a cooking... No,
00:54:51
I don't listen I'm from the cooking town a roux okay so then no wait no it's mirepoix a mirepoix
00:55:00
you mean you cut up the onions yes a roux is the yes so okay the roux is the start of
00:55:05
something else like a bechema sauce great I was like wow it's been a while uh okay so in 2006
00:55:15
He legally changes his name from Eric Clinton Newman to Luca Rocco Magnata. So that's a completely made up name.
00:55:22
Why did he? Which I love it. He wanted to seem Italian. You know how Italians are.
00:55:28
So he applies for bankruptcy in March of 2007, citing illness, lack of employment, insufficient
00:55:34
income to pay off his debts. Hey, we've all been there. but then after the bankruptcy his quest for fame kicks into high gear he was questing for fame he's
00:55:47
questing for fame in a big way so he wants money he wants to live she'll ease glamorous life oh like
00:55:53
you and i know like at this point like fame isn't like what people say it is steven cut that part
00:55:58
out. Fame is still popcorn ceiling, man. You got to get that popcorn ceiling life. Okay. So here's
00:56:09
what he does. He auditions for a reality show called Cover Guy. You can see the opening credits
00:56:16
now. No, no, I'm saying in your mind. Cover Guy. He declares in his casting video that quote,
00:56:23
a lot of people tell me I'm devastatingly good looking. You know that that shit would sell now,
00:56:27
but like whatever year that was, everyone's like, what is this shit? What are you doing?
00:56:32
He was not chosen. He was a reject from cover guy? From cover guy. Like what'll break your heart more?
00:56:39
Then, well, this, that he auditions for the reality show Plastic Makes Perfect. Oh no.
00:56:45
Flaunting his multiple hair transplants, nose job explaining how he wanted to get pectoral implants.
00:56:51
He was rejected. Yeah. Explain my face right now. So it's just not, the fame plan is not going as expected.
00:57:03
To get rejected from the bottom of the barrel, like you know is the bottom of the barrel show.
00:57:08
You're not good enough for a plastic surgery show. So then what he started to do was focus his efforts online.
00:57:18
So he twice created Wikipedia pages for himself, only to have them taken down by the self-policing community.
00:57:27
Imagine what was on those. It's Wikipedia. Imagine the self-policing community is like,
00:57:35
they let so much shit fly. And then they're like, this fucking idiot? Not this guy.
00:57:40
Not this fucking idiot. Then he created the rumor on message boards that he was dating Carla Homolka,
00:57:47
the wife of Paul Bernardo, who killed two teenagers along with raping and murdering her own sister.
00:57:54
Oh my God, this is how, okay. I did not understand. In my mind, whenever I saw people write this thing,
00:58:00
I thought he was Paul Byrne. I think I got these whole things confused. So this is exciting.
00:58:08
So this is a guy who, he creates the rumor on message boards that he is dating her.
00:58:13
But he's not the one who killed her sister. No, that's her husband. Oh my God, I thought he was the husband.
00:58:19
He really did that. Then the husband goes to jail. She, I think, goes to jail for a while, but then gets out.
00:58:24
Gets out, right. And then he decides to tell people he's dating her now that she's out.
00:58:28
Holy shit. To get that kind of infamy. That's the level of celebrity he's going for now.
00:58:32
Yeah, yeah. But then he calls into a radio show to deny the rumors that he started online.
00:58:40
Then he visits a newsroom in Toronto. and that's the first time he's on mainstream press
00:58:48
talking about it and denying it. Oh, sorry. He said he dated her in the 90s, not when she got out of jail.
00:58:57
All right. So then there's many profiles on various internet, social media, and discussion forums created over several years
00:59:06
to plant false or unverified claims about him. and he would himself immediately dismiss these
00:59:16
as rumors and hoaxes and a campaign of cyber stalking. According to the police, Magnata set up at least 70 Facebook pages
00:59:26
and 20 websites under different names. 70 Facebook pages? Yeah. Can you imagine how many naps that is?
00:59:35
I mean, how many other things could you have been doing? Naps. In 2010, this is the part where it's going to turn and you're going to get upset.
00:59:45
Okay. Do children get murdered? In 2010, he posted a video called one boy, two kittens.
00:59:50
Oh no. Where he asphyxiated two tabby cats. Wait, what? No. Using a vacuum cleaner Yeah And a plastic bag This is why I never heard of him And until he was tracked down he was just known as the vacuum kitten killer
01:00:08
How does that even work? So you put, oh my God. Yeah. That was a big jump from 70 Facebooks.
01:00:17
I know. Well, here's the thing. All that other stuff isn't working. So he keeps doing things attempt after attempt after attempt.
01:00:24
And people are like, no, no, no. What kind it is. Right. So then he's, because he's a sociopath, because he doesn't really care and he doesn't have any empathy.
01:00:34
Jesus Christ. He does that. Oh my God. Okay. Okay. Now we're in 2012 and it is May 26th and a Montana lawyer named Roger Renville sees a bizarre internet video depicting a man being stabbed and dismembered.
01:00:52
he alerts US and Canadian police about this video and they dismiss it as a fake.
01:01:02
He just saw it like where? It was posted. So it was uploaded. It was called One Lunatic, One Ice Pick.
01:01:09
And it was uploaded to two gore sites, which were super explicit places that were just like super violent.
01:01:17
I love that this guy who's like on gore sites is like, this is too much for me. Like what, you know, like it had to be that awful.
01:01:25
Well, he's a lawyer. So maybe he was looking on there for this reason. Okay. Well, because he reported it to the police.
01:01:36
So it looked like, oh, maybe he's like seen gore, like real crime scenes and bodies.
01:01:40
So he knows what it looks like. Yeah, that's kind of, I think that's what they said.
01:01:44
Holy shit. Meanwhile, Luca Magnata has flown from Montreal to Paris. And when he arrives in Paris,
01:01:51
he was wearing a wig and a Mickey Mouse t-shirt. Super chill. And then, so basically that was on the 26th
01:01:59
is when he flew to Paris. Three days later on the 29th, the residents of his apartment building
01:02:05
start complaining of a foul smell. Nope, never complain of a foul smell. So the janitor then discovers a suitcase
01:02:11
next to a mountain of garbage bags behind the building and inside is the headless torso of a man.
01:02:19
Oh my God. Now, 6 p.m. that same night, a package containing a human foot is received at the Conservative Party of Canada headquarters in Ottawa.
01:02:31
And it had been mailed from Montreal. At 9 p.m., a package addressed to the Liberal Party headquarters in Ottawa was discovered by postal employees to contain a human hand.
01:02:43
What the fuck? Um, so after taking statements and finding evidence in the trash, including a blunt instrument
01:02:50
and papers identifying Luca Magnata, um, they, and the police enter his apartment.
01:02:56
So like he did this on purpose, like sent this shit, like knowingly that it was his
01:03:00
stuff, like going to lead to him on purpose. Uh, sounds like it. No. What do you mean?
01:03:08
Nevermind. No, I don't think so. Okay. Um, so the, so a police. enter his apartment and it's actually a very dark studio apartment.
01:03:18
Um, and then they find a bloody mattress and blood in the refrigerator and scrawled in red ink inside a closet.
01:03:26
Other words, if you don't like the reflection, don't look in the mirror. I don't care.
01:03:30
Oh my God. Um, so when a rest warrant is issued for Luca Magnata, um, so, uh, the Interpol adds him to the wanted list and people,
01:03:44
um, in, uh, he was in Paris and he was declared an international fugitive and, uh, he's, they start,
01:03:52
you know, the cops start getting a ton of tips, um, that he's at a bar, he's trying to crash a
01:03:58
house party. Um, he actually took the bus to Berlin. Uh, his name was all over the papers and
01:04:05
all over television and the French media nicknamed him the butcher of Montreal and the German, um,
01:04:12
media nicknamed him the porno killer um so but your Montreal's way cooler he uh that's better
01:04:20
uh um so he gets to uh this is this is my favorite part he gets to in Berlin he gets to an internet
01:04:30
cafe um this is about a week after all that and the guy that's working there um a man walks in
01:04:38
wearing sunglasses and makeup and says bonjour internet and so the guy kind of notices him this
01:04:44
episode is called bonjour internet right and uh so the guy working there um recognizes this man's
01:04:52
face who walked in but he can't place it and so he's looking at the guy so the guy goes over to
01:04:58
a computer and you know rents it out and the guy from his workstation is looking down at the monitor
01:05:05
that this guy is using. And he noticed that this man, who's wearing sunglasses, is looking at article after article
01:05:14
about the killer in Montreal. Oh my God. And so then he puts it together that it's him.
01:05:20
Can you imagine? So basically they go up and they're just like, you're that guy, right?
01:05:26
And he goes, you caught me. Oh, what in the fucking fun? Yeah. So he basically got caught
01:05:32
because he was Googling pictures of himself. You idiot. so um i feel like you just there's nothing good that happens in internet cafes and yeah not anymore
01:05:42
you know what i mean like yeah something's wrong it's over now yeah maybe 1997 98 that was last
01:05:48
time yeah um okay so uh then on june 5th the package containing a right foot was delivered to saint george school another package containing a right hand was sent to Falls Creek Elementary School in Vancouver Both schools opened as normal the following morning
01:06:05
and it was confirmed that both packages were sent from Montreal. But were they staggered?
01:06:12
Like who was sending them then? He was sending them all from Montreal, but they were different places.
01:06:17
So like Vancouver's further away. So Magnata is arrested and then he's transferred to a Berlin prison hospital
01:06:27
and a psychiatrist believes that he's in a psychotic state. So meanwhile, the police identify the torso victim
01:06:36
as Lin Jun. And he's a 33-year-old Chinese computer science student at Concordia University.
01:06:45
It's unclear how he met Luca Mangata. At an internet cafe, I bet. Oh, well, they say that Magata had been posting Men Seeking Men in the Men Seeking Men section of Craigslist under an alias.
01:07:02
Oh, sad. And so basically they go back and check the video and they see Lin Jun had entered Luca Magnata's apartment building.
01:07:13
And then like the next day is when they see the video where Luca Magnata is taking things out and putting them in the garbage can.
01:07:20
He just wanted to love and be loved and like got murdered. That's so sad. Yeah. Yeah.
01:07:28
So then he gets taken back to Canada on a military plane. And then they find Lin John's skull at the edge of a small lake in Angrinan Park after they get an anonymous tip.
01:07:44
So someone may have found it. um and so not only does luca magnata go to trial obviously he's arrested and charged with murder
01:07:54
um but the police charged uh the website owner who posted um one lunatic whatever the name of
01:08:04
that video was that guy got charged with corrupting morals uh one lunatic one ice pick um why and he
01:08:12
ended up going because it was real but he didn't know it was real well but but it's his like
01:08:19
responsibility he probably i think probably in watching it like the lawyer did yeah you would
01:08:24
know yeah um god so is it out there can you like i wonder if it's out there i have no idea did you
01:08:30
ever watch like um what was that website it wasn't sick.com but it was something like that
01:08:38
Rotten.com. Rotten.com. Yeah. Did you ever click through that? Yeah. That's troubling.
01:08:44
Yeah, it's a bummer. But I've seen... Yeah, go on. So basically, he just goes to court and he ends up...
01:08:54
They give him a life sentence without the chance of parole for at least 25 years.
01:08:59
and they tried to say in the court case that he's basically that he was crazy and it doesn't work
01:09:14
and he gets basically the full extent and they added on all these other charges.
01:09:18
It was like first degree murder but then also committing an indignity to a human body,
01:09:23
publishing obscene material, criminally harassing, prime minister. I mean, all that sending stuff to government.
01:09:29
stuff made it all you know so what did they say what he had like how he killed the guy and then
01:09:36
like was the dismemberment after he was well it's all in the video so it looked like they
01:09:42
he stabbed him to death and then dismembered him jesus christ yeah can you imagine if you'd like
01:09:46
watch that being like this is fake and then like going back and being like no you fucking watched
01:09:53
him well that's why all that stuff is like why would you want that in your head it's so it's
01:09:58
such a bummer and it's such bad vibes even if you're faking something like that like what the
01:10:02
fuck are you doing well I'll look up like crime scene photos sometimes and then like I there's
01:10:08
ones that are like they clearly can't be fake and I'd be like nope it's fake it's like I have to
01:10:13
commit like commit to it being fake or else I'll lose my mind yeah it's not I don't think it's good
01:10:18
to have those pictures in your head absolutely not no and it doesn't help you it's not like you
01:10:24
can't imagine what it might be like right um he also so anyway in 2015 uh luca magnata he tried
01:10:32
to file an appeal for the convictions um but it didn't it didn't work and uh he actually withdrew
01:10:40
the appeal himself so apparently someone i don't know if i don't know what happened but i was like
01:10:45
cut it out he was like you know what i'm gonna drop this whole fame thing maybe i'm gonna try to
01:10:50
do something else finally i'm just gonna i'm gonna get into buddhism uh so that's the story
01:10:57
now i understand why everybody was so obsessed with it because it truly is insane and horrible
01:11:02
and uh beyond that's like i'm gonna listen to other people now because like i always thought
01:11:09
that i always i never looked that one up everyone does constantly want us to do that one and i
01:11:13
always thought it was connected. I got that one and that horrible couple kind of.
01:11:20
The Paul Bernardo case. Yeah. I always kind of thought it was the same thing. I was like, I don't need to know about
01:11:24
this one. So I didn't realize I have never heard any of that. I know. I didn't know it was that like crazy detailed. I didn't know he was like, the idea
01:11:33
that you're sending body parts to the prime minister or to like grammar schools, all those
01:11:38
things where, and then knowing his whole thing of wanting to be famous. Like you're that needy that you would, like he didn't murder someone because he wanted to murder someone. He murdered someone so he could put the video up online and get famous.
01:11:51
That's what it seems like. It does seem like that. Which is so gross. I mean, like, I guess it's, it must be an element of most killers. The thought that...
01:12:00
Like everyone will know me or I'll have this power. Sure. I'll become renowned or whatever.
01:12:04
But like most of those people do like, like what are the killings called when like you're out in public
01:12:09
and you kill a bunch of people? Like a mass murder? Like they do mass murders to do that.
01:12:14
Not what he did, which is like so personal and creepy. And then it's almost like forcing other people to watch it.
01:12:22
Well, and also it almost seems like just this lame modern version where it's just like, oh, I'll put it on YouTube.
01:12:29
You know what I mean? And I'll put my super gross, you know, serious mental problem on YouTube and get a bunch of hits.
01:12:36
And like force other people to have to deal with that, having seen that for the rest of their lives.
01:12:41
Yeah. But I mean, that's the thing. If you're looking, you're going to find it. I know. I know.
01:12:45
Like you have to remember if you're, if you're on a horrible gore site, then that's what you might look at.
01:12:51
And then you're going to have that in your head. Don't do it. as someone who like can't sleep at night it's so easy to just kind of like click on this thing
01:13:00
and click on the next thing and then suddenly you find yourself at this like place and then
01:13:04
suddenly you see some shit you don't want to see but you can't like away it's like not like you're
01:13:08
like fucking typing in like man murders another man it's like you just like I've seen some shit
01:13:15
that I didn't realize I didn't want to see until I saw it you know what I mean yeah and it's hard
01:13:23
to get out of your head, but who are you to, like other people are looking at it because
01:13:29
they want to see it. It's fucked up. Yeah. That's amazing. That was crazy. We finally did that one.
01:13:38
Finally. Thank you. No, thank you. Okay. Wow. Karen, we're back. Yeah. I know. Any updates?
01:13:50
Yes. A couple. So in 2018, Lucas Magnata's mother co-authored the book My Son, the Killer.
01:13:57
And in it, he spoke out publicly for the first time since his conviction, saying that he regretted his defense strategy.
01:14:04
The quote is, it's very annoying. I never wanted anything to do with the NCR, which means not criminally irresponsible, which is Canada's version of the insanity defense or an approximation.
01:14:17
I have no mental illness whatsoever. I had to go with it, even though I didn't want to. But my lawyers pressured me into it, end quote.
01:14:27
So just kind of a real sociopath, psychopathic move of I'm here to argue about how people see me
01:14:35
being defined as whether or not I'm criminally responsible. I am criminally responsible.
01:14:41
And someone else did me dirty. And that's why. That's why. Period. Yes. Scapegoating, blaming and still. Yeah, that's the one comment he makes. According to CTV, Magnat is currently imprisoned at the medium security in La Macaza institution. He'll be eligible for what they call day parole in 2034 and full parole in 2037.
01:15:06
Yikes. And of course we all know that a year after that in 2019 Netflix released the legendary docuseries Don Fuck With Cats which was all the cyber sleuths who basically banded together to find Luca Magnata after he started posting videos of himself
01:15:24
killing kittens online. Did you watch it? I was warned not to watch it. I have never watched it.
01:15:31
Here's the thing. I recommend it because it's essentially you get to meet these incredible personalities.
01:15:40
The people behind the term cyber sleuth, you like to talk about it but actually you meet and hear from those people and there's one woman
01:15:48
who is the best um we've talked about her we can avoid the disturbing video parts right
01:15:57
absolutely okay yeah like i could fast forward okay i just i've been too scared obviously but i
01:16:03
yeah it's a fucking classic i need to watch it yes for sure and also just this story is the origin
01:16:09
of the title of this episode because Magnata himself went into an internet cafe wearing
01:16:15
sunglasses and makeup and said, bonjour internet. So that's who we're actually quoting here.
01:16:22
Let's change the name because we should quote someone else, not him. There's plenty of other hilarious things we say in this episode. We should not be,
01:16:28
you know, these are the things we're only a year in. We still haven't learned not to do things like quote the killer himself for the title of the episode.
01:16:36
I wonder if maybe we should also consider titles that come from the rewind part, this part of the episode for the title change.
01:16:48
You know what I mean? That's for the rewatch when we start doing video episodes of the rewinds.
01:16:53
It's going to go forever into a circle of hell. It's just going to be one of those a video of a video of a video happening right now.
01:17:02
Yep. Oh, my God. Basically, you standing with a video camera in front of a mirror and then it goes off into a million.
01:17:08
It's baseballs. Come on. It is. It is. OK, so that was my story. So we're going to go into what's essentially the wrap up of this episode, the old wrap up, where we are now doing good things of the week because we need to counterbalance our discussions of all of this difficulty with some good stuff.
01:17:27
So we realize that. It's slowly dawning on us. Yeah. I love mine because it's the beginning of Jacuzzi Cat, Gus the Jacuzzi Cat.
01:17:39
I think we lived there like two or three years and he ended up becoming one of my best friends.
01:17:43
We heard a lot about Gus the Jacuzzi Cat over the years. Yep. And this is his premiere.
01:17:48
Such a special cat. Okay. Well, you'll hear Georgia talk all about that. Yes. And everything else that we kind of in this wrap up.
01:17:59
Can I tell you, I forgot about this. I was, we moved in this new place this weekend.
01:18:06
And the first day we moved in, I was walking down this, like, the staircase. And this, like, girl with a really cute dog walked up.
01:18:14
And she was this, like, cool girl. Like, not cool. You know, she was, like, someone I would have drinks with.
01:18:19
A cool girl. And I could have sworn when we walked by each other, she whispered, stay sexy.
01:18:26
I am serious. I think she whispered, stay sexy. That's creepy. Which is so creepy.
01:18:32
But I think I also really paranoid No I know I also really paranoid Yeah you definitely really paranoid But it sounded like she said something like that I mean I guess you find out
01:18:44
So I'm going to die. Do you have a positive thing? That's what I thought you were doing.
01:18:52
And then it turned into that. I thought you were doing a positive thing when you started that story.
01:18:58
No, that's not positive. No, it's not. I realize now. It was like a twist-a-roo at the end.
01:19:04
My real positive thing, so I'm in this new apartment, a new apartment complex, and there's this thing that happened yesterday, and it puts two of my favorite words together as one.
01:19:18
And so my positive thing is jacuzzi cat. There's a fucking giant black cat. and Vince and I were in the jacuzzi
01:19:27
this fucking giant black cat strolls over to the side of the jacuzzi and I thought I was in
01:19:33
fucking Narnia like let me pet him with my wet hand like I just was petting him and then he had a collar on I looked at the collar
01:19:41
his name was fucking Gus while you're sitting in I got in the jacuzzi and was about to cry
01:19:47
because how happy I am that I get to be in a jacuzzi like this is my dream I can't believe this and then this cat
01:19:53
just fucking saunters on up named Gus. Like that's a fucking fake. And he was like, I think he was an alien.
01:20:01
Like he was kind of like watching the perimeter, but like letting me, like only me,
01:20:07
pat him like a wet hand. That's hilarious. It was like, it was a dream. It was amazing.
01:20:13
That's good news. Yeah. About your future jacuzzi experiences. Jacuzzi cat. What if it's a different one next time?
01:20:21
Annabelle comes up. She's all white. Oh my God. With one green eye and one blue eye.
01:20:27
Dude. Steven and I were just talking about how there's a fucking cat at the fucking cat shelter.
01:20:34
Named Cappuccino. Who's white with one green eye and one fucking blue eye. Whoa.
01:20:40
Named Cappuccino? No. Yes. But it's still a white cat with a blue eye and a green eye.
01:20:47
Fucking Matrix, man. I don't care what my therapist says about detachment fucking issues.
01:20:51
Yeah. This is the Matrix. Oh yeah. You got to tap in. You just got to tap in. What's yours?
01:20:59
Well, I guess I would say it was going to see the Golden Girls Live, which I had to,
01:21:07
I went and did Jamie Lee's podcast. So I was downtown. It was kind of far away and I'd bought
01:21:12
this ticket. And when I went to buy the ticket for Golden Girls Live, you usually can roll up
01:21:18
and buy as many tickets as you want. It's like one of the scrolly things. And I could only roll
01:21:22
up to one. So I was like, Oh, whatever. I'll just, if I can only have one, I'll have one. So I bought
01:21:26
that ticket. So it turns out I bought the last ticket. The guy told me, cause he was like, you're
01:21:32
not on this list. And he like checked it a ton of times. And then he went on to the website to get
01:21:37
their list. And then he goes, he watched one girl's name disappear and my name took her place.
01:21:42
And he goes, you literally bought the last ticket. I'm like, hell yes. So I had to sit in a chair in
01:21:48
the aisle, he goes, here, you can sit right here. And so like everyone else is kind of you know how it is in that room It like raised up And I I was like someone weird handicap grandma where I was just in a chair in the aisle like I fire it here Yeah exactly Um so the show starts the lights go down and they put up the
01:22:07
opening screen of the golden girls and then the theme song starts and everybody starts singing
01:22:13
the theme song. No, everyone starts singing the theme song together. And it was, it, everyone was
01:22:20
like laughing and smiling it was like a very beautiful like bonding moment in this weird way
01:22:26
where it was just really nice and it was you know it's like 80 people or something i would please
01:22:31
bring me next time i would love to go yeah we should totally go it would be so fun but it was
01:22:35
just like a lovely first of all i like a group sing it's always very like cathartic but then
01:22:40
everyone knows every word to the theme song to the golden girls and like some people really belting
01:22:45
it out and it brings you back to like a moment in time like you used you know I used to stay at
01:22:50
home I was a kid and I watched that with my family yeah totally Friday night that's what you did it
01:22:56
was that was that's what was going on with everybody with that whole it was really lovely
01:22:59
they have a mug I follow Jackie Beat on Instagram oh I bought one of those mugs does it say thank
01:23:06
you for being a cunt it's all those guys dressed up as the golden girls thank you for being a cunt
01:23:12
It's genius. I can't even handle how fucking amazing that is. Yeah, it's super good.
01:23:18
So, you know. That's a great moment. So what a great capper. All right, that was a nice little ending for the old episode.
01:23:29
And now here in the Rewind episode, we're going to obviously retitle it, Bonjour Internet's Gotta Go.
01:23:37
That's right. So this is such a weird word to see written, but we could call it, we have to reconnoiter.
01:23:45
What a weird word. Yeah. I think it's an army style word. You know what I mean? That makes sense.
01:23:52
Reconnoitering. It's like, we have to figure this out again. Sure. Also, there's Greg Kinnear pops to mind when we're talking about the Ted Bundy conversation.
01:24:02
Because he really does. He does. And then when we said cut half of that out, it was 45 minutes of an intro.
01:24:10
Oh, my God. And Georgia gave a really good direction to Steven in terms of editing.
01:24:16
Just cut half of it out. I think it's true. Half of it is shit. Just fucking do it.
01:24:20
But I think the real title needs to be Jacuzzi Cat. Yeah. Right. What a good boy, Gus.
01:24:27
Yeah. Well, we're not going to say goodbye because it turns out the old us way back when.
01:24:33
and Elvis and his new pod loft say it for us. So here's the end of the episode, y'all.
01:24:42
That's our episode. Thanks for listening. You know, Twitter, Facebook. Places. Merch.
01:24:51
Instagram. Feelings. Here we go. Buy tickets if you're in a city where it is not sold out.
01:24:56
We'd love to see you. Check what those cities are on the Facebook page. and stay sexy.
01:25:03
And don't get murdered. Elvis? Want a cookie? You want a cookie? Okay, bye. Bye.