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00:01:54
Hello and welcome to Rewind with Karen in Georgia. Every Wednesday, we recap our old shows with all new commentary, insights and updates.
00:02:04
And this week, we are giving probably the best kind of update we could possibly give.
00:02:09
That's freaking right. The yogurt shop murders have finally been solved. So we're going to recap episode 70, which we named Live at the Moon Tower Comedy Festival.
00:02:20
And this was recorded in Austin, Texas. So amazing. This episode came out on May 25th, 2017.
00:02:26
All right, let's get into it. I can't wait to talk about this. Let's listen to the intro of episode 70.
00:02:43
Hi, Austin! Oh my God, me too. Just do that for a little longer. I'm trying to finish my mint.
00:02:59
You don't mind? They love it. They love it. Spit it over there. What's up, Texas?
00:03:12
We're finally here. I wore my cowboy boots for you guys. Yeah. Take a walk. Walk those things around.
00:03:23
Vince said... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Scared. Vince said that they're culturally appropriating.
00:03:36
Yes. That I'm culturally appropriating. This is definitely a problematic way to start the show.
00:03:40
Sorry, guys. And I also wore my hair closer to God. I guess that's the thing. Yeah, they love that.
00:03:49
See, I know how to... Pander. Yeah. Yeah. What are you wearing tonight, Karen? Well, I am wearing a dress that's a little too tight.
00:03:58
And so it's got, I've got like a reverse Spanx situation where kind of like, you can't tell if it's a big stomach or a flop of material and neither can I.
00:04:09
I'm not sure what's happening down here. and I don't care anymore. Show everyone your hands.
00:04:16
Thanks. I really wanted to put my microphone next to that microphone. Do you know how much the sound guy would hate me
00:04:26
if I did that? Just like, what do you think? Oh, no. So obnoxious. This place is haunted, I heard.
00:04:34
Stephen, is it? Stephen sent us this long text that I got after we got off the plane
00:04:39
and it was like the history of this place and here are all the ghosts. There's a projectionist
00:04:46
that worked here when this was a movie theater and he died while showing Casablanca
00:04:51
which everyone thinks is beautiful because he died doing what he loved. I agree. I didn't mean
00:04:57
to say it like that. That sounded argumentative and bizarre. So stupid. You guys think that's nice.
00:05:06
What you don't know is... I was going to tell you on stage. Saving it for this. Yeah.
00:05:15
So Vince and I were on the airplane today and I couldn't get into Wi-Fi. So he leaned over as a husband will do
00:05:22
and was like, let me figure this out. And so he figures all this stuff out and then he goes to click on a website
00:05:26
just to see if it's working and he pulls down my favorites page. Which you know most people are like
00:05:31
Facebook and Twitter and Craigslist or whatever the normal things are. And then he stares at it for a minute
00:05:39
and he goes, are these all serial killers? And I was just like, yeah. Yeah. And then we moved on.
00:05:49
Serial killers are my Google It just a given Yeah I had a kind of fascinating thing happen First of all I was the last person on the plane Oh my God You give me a panic attack I know That how different George and I are I was standing in the security line like
00:06:09
oh, this sucks. And George is like, text, text, text, I'm on the plane. Where are you?
00:06:14
I was like, fuck. So I walked right on last. um then a guy who looked like he was it could have been i mean he was on his way to the city
00:06:26
but i was like is he coming to our festival um he was really big and had a ton of tattoos
00:06:32
and many on his neck yeah um my friend used to call those the job stoppers just something to consider um but these guys look like they look like they were in a band
00:06:46
of like, it could have been Linkin Park. I'm not sure. I'm really old. I'm incredibly old.
00:06:51
And he didn't have like tattoos that are like, oh, he's like, he just like pays a lot of money
00:06:56
and gets tattoos. Like they look like prison tattoos. They look like defensive maneuvers,
00:07:00
the way a cuttlefish changes into a different thing in the ocean of like, don't get me.
00:07:06
He was totally like, beware of me. I'm very scary. Well, he stands up and he's like,
00:07:12
I got to get off this plane. And he fucking takes off. He had to go. He couldn't handle flying the plane.
00:07:20
He was panicking? Yeah. Aw. I know. That's sweet. You should have cradled him the whole flight.
00:07:27
Could you come down here a second? You're going to love this. Hold your hand. I know it's a weird time for you, and it's probably very shaming to be a very large, mean-looking man that's literally like,
00:07:38
get me off this plane right now. Bested by a panic attack. Yeah. That's a bummer.
00:07:44
I mean, I've had it. I've had, and on a plane, I've actually had a seizure on a plane.
00:07:48
No brag, no brag. Oh, no. It's pretty cool. I was, I had been bumped up to first class because they screwed up my ticket.
00:07:59
Yeah. And I was flying home from England. Oh, my God. And I was sitting next to, I was sitting next to this man who was like, he was like a silver
00:08:08
fox and he had like really expensive clothes on from what I could tell, like not Target.
00:08:13
and I wanted to touch it. And he was like kind of being charming and talking to me.
00:08:21
And I had the thought in my head of like, why can't I have a sugar daddy? Why can't I be one of those girls?
00:08:26
I would be the best kind because you wouldn't see it coming. It'd be like, oh, is that your assistant?
00:08:33
And he'd be like, yep, that's my assistant. I had this whole fantasy in my mind of how we were going to do it.
00:08:41
But then I had a seizure. Oh my god, that's the worst possible event. Not cool. It's not how you want a guy to see you, foaming at the mouth with blue lips.
00:08:57
The last thing I heard was him go, excuse me, I think this young lady needs help.
00:09:01
He was already, it's like we were no longer even close anymore. He was immediately distancing himself from me
00:09:08
just because I was having a seizure like a common drug addict on a plane. That's...
00:09:15
Ooh, that makes me... That's scary. I know, sorry. I just dug that one up from deep, deep down inside.
00:09:21
I've only done the normal throwing up thing on a plane before. Which, like, everyone here has probably, right?
00:09:29
Nope. Just me. Well, I think they have some questions like I do. Was it in the aisle or in the bathroom?
00:09:36
No, no, no. It was in a receptacle. Like, not in... Where? In your lap, though? I don't...
00:09:42
Yeah. Say. Yes! Uh, what? What? Into one of them bags? Yeah. For, you used a barf bag on a plane?
00:09:51
Yeah. Are you from 1955? This is amazing! Yeah, that happened. That's what they're for though, right?
00:10:00
No, totally. Sorry, the tone is wrong. I'm a little nervous, so everything I'm saying isn't how I mean it.
00:10:06
It's all coming out super weird, but did you have to, this is the question I've always
00:10:11
because it's barf. I mean, it just comes out. So do you, like, make your own thing at the top
00:10:17
so it doesn't come out the sides? Yeah, hopefully it won't be, like, overflow and you don't have to grab your neighbors.
00:10:23
Right. But then they have, like, it's like you're at, like, the grocery store getting vegetables and it has a little, like, twist tie.
00:10:28
No. It's like a bag of cookies from Trader Joe's or something. Oh, I don't want to eat these all at once.
00:10:35
I'm just going to wrap it down, put it aside. What a historic place to talk about barfing.
00:10:41
Yes. It's pretty beautiful. This is the most beautiful place I've ever talked about barfing before.
00:10:47
Now I want to see you do it myself, I have to say. I'll let you know next time. At some point on this tour, I want to see it.
00:10:53
Okay. I've had too much red wine, you know, sort of thing. That would be a bad one.
00:10:58
I know. Because that's going to stain me as well as you. Wow. Yeah. This is clearly my favorite murder.
00:11:08
Hi. Hi. Yep. I'm a little nervous about this show. I don't know why. Because Austin's cool people?
00:11:17
Austin's cool people. You know that. It's comedy people. That's very important. Yeah.
00:11:24
It's also Texas. You guys have been showing up for this podcast since day one. Like big time.
00:11:31
Thank you. Yeah. I feel like when we were in New York and I was like, this is big at the beacon.
00:11:39
I feel the same way where it's like, oh my God, don't make them hate you. I'm doing a great job.
00:11:45
Where it's all click, click, click. I saw them live. That was it. I got it out of my system.
00:11:51
Oh no. It happens sometimes. Yeah. We'll think of something else. We make croissants or something It be fine We be fine Oh we got cookies backstage too Oh yeah thanks for the cookies Yeah they so pretty We love them No Um should we Very good state
00:12:08
Somebody who clearly studied theater was like, you're welcome. I used my diaphragm.
00:12:16
Project your voice. There you go. There you go. Do you know, you want to know a trick about song
00:12:24
performance? This is one of the only things I learned in college. Because I took a class, it was
00:12:30
stage performance for musical theater singing. Stage performance. We got the musical theater
00:12:38
crowd, I hear tonight. What up, nerds? So you guys already know this, so don't get bored as I tell you this.
00:12:48
But as people in musicals sing, you just always have your arm going in a different direction.
00:12:53
Oh my God. And the thing is, if you're going to sing about the horizon, you don't point to the horizon.
00:12:59
You sing about the horizon, but you point down there. And then suddenly you're like, oh my God, I love that.
00:13:04
Is it because you point at the horizon and the people are going to be like, where's the horizon?
00:13:08
Is there a horizon in here? Is there really a horizon? Okay, so it's just really...
00:13:13
Just kind of go opposite of what you're talking about. And it creates a bit of a cognitive dissonance in the mind.
00:13:20
and then the performance seems more important than it actually is and you're not just singing about Oklahoma.
00:13:27
I get it. Wow. That's really great. Thank you. I also need to learn how to sing and not just hurt people's ears when I sing.
00:13:36
But I'll do it this while I'm doing it. Just give it a whirl. Yeah, I will. Next time at karaoke.
00:13:41
Okay. Is Stephen under here? No. Stephen's at home watching my cats and he keeps sending me the cutest photos.
00:13:52
Like, really cute photos. I feel like if there's anyone that was ever born to be a cat sitter,
00:13:58
it's Stephen Ray Morris. Like, if you don't know him, and maybe some of you don't,
00:14:03
or you're like, who's this guy? It's just, if you picture a cat sitter in your mind just as fast as you can,
00:14:09
that's him. Add a mustache. Boom. It's so funny because sometimes I get depressed when we're out touring
00:14:16
because I miss my cats and I'm like, are they okay? I don't know if they're feeding them.
00:14:20
I wonder if they miss me, you know? Yeah. And then I drink too much red wine to forget it.
00:14:26
But like, knowing Steven's there, like I barely thought about that. No. I'm just like, no, they're actually,
00:14:32
they like him a little better than me. Yeah, and he loves them more than you. He loves them way more than, like I love, you know,
00:14:38
and he just is taking so many selfies with the cats. And I gave him my Instagram cat,
00:14:43
my cat Instagram password. Whoa. I'm just like, go crazy, dude. That's real commitment.
00:14:47
Get me some followers. What's up? Work it, Steven. Work it. Let's get it together.
00:14:53
Yeah, let's hear it for Steven Ray Morris. He makes it all happen. We recently got asked if we were really as mean to him in real life as we are in the podcast.
00:15:05
We are. But it doesn't matter because now he gets anything that we get sent, people send things to Steven now, too.
00:15:14
Yeah. So he's on the bandwagon. I think the dream is to start making enough money
00:15:19
that Steven not only is able to come on tour with us, but he is lowered down on a half moon at the top of the show.
00:15:27
For sure. Wouldn't that be good? Oh, my God. Holding a live, hairless cat. Oh, my God.
00:15:33
Immediately that needs to happen to me. Yeah. Should we sit down? Look at these nice seats.
00:15:38
I know. These are some good, young. I think these are kind of the nicest ones we've had in a while.
00:15:42
Yeah. I'm going to do this, though. Last time I really felt like something rated, like NC-17 was happening.
00:15:51
Oh, no. While I was on stage. So I just like to do a little less of the direct, like, you didn't pay extra for those seats, did you?
00:15:59
You don't get to have that. Everyone look away real quick. Uh-oh. There we go. These might be more form than function.
00:16:08
All right. How's that? Did you hear that? I do. You can make it fart. Fartfy. So...
00:16:16
It feels a little unstable. Like, you know what I mean? Mm-hmm. So one of us might fall.
00:16:21
Someone in the back that works here is crying. They're like, those are my good stools.
00:16:26
I thought they would love them. I'm just like, yeah. It's just a little... Oh, this is perfect.
00:16:36
I'll sit like this. A three-quarter. And tell me everything. And then when I tell my murder, I'll just do this.
00:16:42
And I'll do that. And I'll do this. and then down over here. And I'll do this. And I just won't even look at you the whole time.
00:16:48
You're going to Sharon Stone this thing? I thought that's what you were doing. I didn't mean to put you in a bad place.
00:16:56
No, I mean, no. I might as well. No, you don't. I can't sing and you don't want to see my underwear.
00:17:03
Those are the two. Those are my two rules in life. You've got to have at least two rules
00:17:08
when you go on stage and not showing people your underwear maybe should be in there if that's your thing.
00:17:15
Sure. Probably if you're a podcaster. Right, right. Yeah, because, man, I don't spend enough money on lingerie
00:17:23
because who cares? Who's going to... Target, again, bought mine from Target. Not like rich people.
00:17:29
I mean, look, it works. Target works, and so we work it. Yeah. I mean, I need to get...
00:17:37
Look, I need to get eye drops, bananas, and a brand new coat. Where am I going to go?
00:17:41
I'm fucking going to Target. Uh, should we do our murders? Yeah, you want to? Yeah, you guys want to do murder?
00:17:50
Do you want to hear some? Oh Bye Now I ready Well Karen let me tell you a tale of murder That was cool
00:18:06
It's like when you get your hair cut and they adjust you and you're like, why though?
00:18:09
Yeah. Why? Come back. Are you staying there? I don't want to be up as high as I was.
00:18:17
Okay, yeah. So how do we... Boop. Uh-oh. Boop. This is the part where I break my own nose with a chair.
00:18:23
You just gotta boop it a little. You can tell I've worked in an office for like 10 years because I know how to boop boop these chairs perfectly.
00:18:29
Oh, you did it real subtle? What? You mean you did little boops? Yeah. Nice. Good work.
00:18:35
I'm new to chairs. This is the listening arm. Yes. Oh, interesting. All right. We're back.
00:18:53
And right off the bat, we have some info about the Paramount Theater actually being super haunted and it being like a known thing.
00:19:01
I mean, how satisfying that eight years later, we're actually going to answer our own question on the same podcast.
00:19:07
It's said to be haunted by three main spirits, each with its own story. The most famous is Emily, the woman in white, who is often described drifting across the mezzanine in a flowing dress.
00:19:18
Some legends say she's searching for her long-lost husband, though there's no solid records of her existence.
00:19:23
Also, the second ghost is a man named Walter Norris, who was a longtime projectionist who died of a heart attack in the booth in the year 2000.
00:19:32
Not an old one, but a recent ghost, reportedly while he was projecting Casablanca.
00:19:37
And since then, theater staff have claimed that his presence lingers with stories of projection equipment malfunctioning until offerings of candy or soda have been left for him.
00:19:47
Yes, I love that. The third spirit is known simply as the elderly gentleman in the opera box.
00:19:54
He's often spotted in the left-hand box seats dressed in a top hat and tails, sometimes accompanied by the smell of cigar smoke before vanishing into thin air.
00:20:03
While his exact identity remains a mystery, his presence is one of the most consistently reported at the theater.
00:20:09
So cool. I'd like to be the lady in the pile of popcorn. So somehow I die covered in popcorn.
00:20:17
Warm popcorn. Like a yellow lab in a pile of leaves, but it's me and popcorn. And then people look over and it's like, it's the popcorn lady.
00:20:25
And also there is a in-depth article from Reporting Texas titled The Paramount Theater, A Timeless Legacy and Its Friendly Ghosts. So you can check out more
00:20:34
information from people who work in the theater recounting firsthand experiences. So we were onto
00:20:39
something. I mean, that's where Casper got his start. The friendliest ghost around. That's right.
00:20:44
It is funny. I said about being nervous because Austin is full of cool cities. I get nervous when
00:20:49
we play in front of cool or comedy cities. And there are certain cities where I'm like,
00:20:53
these people are more accepting and chill than, let's say, Austin, New York, or Los Angeles,
00:20:59
where I get really nervous because they've seen a lot of shows and they're not like,
00:21:03
they're not as patient. Or they're not as like there for the fun of like, ha ha ha from the moment we start.
00:21:09
It feels, yeah, a little more pressure for me. Yeah. I mean, what's great about performing live is you can really project anything you want
00:21:17
onto the audience. So it's like, anytime I go below the Mason Dixon, they hate my guts and you will see it.
00:21:22
If that's your belief, you will see it. No, you're right. I always see what I want to see.
00:21:26
Yeah. I mean, everybody does. That's kind of the that's why when we just did the shows in Boston, the house lights were up the whole time.
00:21:31
It was such a challenge. You want them to yell at them to turn them down. I think it was for cameras.
00:21:38
Oh, that's right. But I think I actually talked about it where I'm just like, we can't be staring into people's faces.
00:21:43
No, it makes it so. I mean, I'm glad I got to see that those two girls way back there had hot dog costumes on.
00:21:48
But, you know, the hot dog girls are showing up at the live shows. They really are.
00:21:53
Pretty great. You know, it's really funny. there was that gift somebody made of us because we got interviewed at that show backstage where
00:22:01
they were shooting from under. And I remember going, you need to tell them like, we need to
00:22:05
get down on the same level as that camera. But of course, it was at the time where I'm like,
00:22:10
no, don't make a problem. And there's a gift that people reused forever shot from underneath.
00:22:16
I know you hate it, but I think we look really cute in it. I mean, okay. I just, you know, can we please think of the middle-aged women that are also
00:22:23
in the picture. I mean, you know, I'm trying to learn that women have necks and chin and skin
00:22:29
there and it's okay. It's normal. And I want, if I'm going to be out there in the world,
00:22:33
I can be an example of that being okay, rather than myself being so fucking horrified of it
00:22:40
every time I see it in a photo. Yes. Well, because I think we've gotten to a place culturally
00:22:44
where people being comfortable with their bodies and being comfortable with the way their bodies
00:22:49
look brings people an immense amount of relief. Yeah. When I see someone with a neck like mine,
00:22:53
I'm like, oh, she looks great. I'm allowed to be like that. No, look at it. Karen's like,
00:22:57
no, I hate it. Well, also, that's just it. It's like we find our spots. Yes. And then like me,
00:23:02
someone who like, I just got my eyes done. Yeah. I just am moving on to the next thing.
00:23:07
There's no rest. There's no rest for the minds like these. No. All right. This is one of my
00:23:13
favorite quote, favorite stories of all times that I cover. This is Georgia's story about the
00:23:18
yogurt shop murders. Picture this. The power goes out, your phone's at 50%, and suddenly your home
00:23:29
is cold, dark, and you can't cook a thing. Oh, and it's the middle of winter. It's freezing. Cold air
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00:24:00
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00:24:05
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00:24:19
and free 200-watt solar panel while this holiday offer lasts. Okay, I'm first, right?
00:24:28
You're first this time, yeah. Okay. Right now. Thank you. Right? Okay. I can see. I don't want to...
00:24:35
Oh, oh, oh. You start reading mine. Stop it. Georgia always does that any time her paper is
00:24:41
face up near me backstage, and I go anywhere near it. She'll go, don't read it! And I'm like,
00:24:47
I am blind. I can't see anything with no glasses on. I just love when it's a surprise.
00:24:53
I don't know why. It doesn't make a difference, but I love it. It's our thing. It's our thing. Just like the underwear rule.
00:24:59
It's ours. Ours and ours alone. One of the other reasons I'm nervous is because this murder, like when we knew we were coming to Austin, I, like a baby brat, said, I'll get this one.
00:25:02
Okay. Like called it to Karen so hard and she was like, go ahead. And then I took it on and I was like, this is hard.
00:25:18
Uh, shit. You know. What were you? Yeah. Wait, is this the one you told me you weren't going to do?
00:25:24
I said I was going to do it. And then I said, never mind, I'm not doing it. And then I did it.
00:25:29
And now you're about to do it? I know I'm doing it. Okay. This is the yogurt shop right now.
00:25:43
We've got to figure out a way to explain to people who work here or might just be passing
00:25:50
through the room accidentally what that moment is about. Because it's not what it seems.
00:25:56
It's not what it appears. That's a good point. Yeah. Whatever. We'll worry about it later.
00:26:01
It'll say, there may be cheering for murders. But it's not that exactly. It's not really that.
00:26:08
Yeah, but we don't... Okay. Yeah, whatever. Not our problem. Okay. So in Austin, Texas, the early 90s,
00:26:18
it's still a relatively small college town feel where violent crime was fairly rare.
00:26:25
And that all changed on December 6, 1991, when 13-year-old Amy Ayers, 15-year-old Sarah Harrison,
00:26:33
when they went to I Can't Believe It's Yogurt in a strip mall. That's like a really unfortunate name.
00:26:39
No, listen, I wanted to laugh too, but I'm a professional, so I didn't. I heard a snicker, and then I was like, do we do that?
00:26:49
Well, there's a whole run of yogurt. We can just visit this for one second. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:26:53
In the 80s and 90s, frozen yogurt was, like the penicillin of America. Yeah. It came so hard for us,
00:27:03
and we all bought it 100%. Totally. In my mind, I was like, well, this is a diet.
00:27:10
I'm going to eat this only. It's yogurt. Yeah. And now I'm going to have, like, John Hughes high school experience.
00:27:19
Didn't turn out that way. No. But I still love, I would get carob chips on mine because I was a hippie.
00:27:25
You are a big hippie. I'm a big hippie. But the names also. So there was, I can't believe it's not yogurt.
00:27:31
I can't believe it's yogurt. I can't believe it's yogurt. I had one across through my house called Frogan Yo-zart.
00:27:38
It's just like, you just can't name it. Like my frozen yogurt. I worked in one in high school called How Sweet It Is.
00:27:45
Gotta. But then it was almost like a subtitle of We Have Yogurt. You'd think that since I love puns so much, I'd love like a play on a name.
00:27:54
Yes. You know, sometimes it's got to be simple. There's also the country's best yogurt, which if it's a chain, how can that be?
00:28:02
But let's not argue right now. Is it a franchise or no? Okay. I can't believe it's yogurt in a strip mall off West Anderson Lane
00:28:11
to visit Sarah's 17-year-old sister, Jennifer, and their friend, Eliza Thomas, also 17,
00:28:18
as they closed up the shop around 11 p.m. Remember when you could just work at places by yourself until 11 p.m.?
00:28:24
Sure. Just like hanging out, closing shops by yourself? I totally did that. It's like, hey, I'm a sophomore.
00:28:28
Of course I can do this business. Of course I should have the keys and work the safe.
00:28:33
Totally. Yeah. That's definitely something. Makes perfect sense. Well, so the girls were going to have a sleepover afterwards.
00:28:40
So Amy and Sarah came by to help close. What? Just that they're like closing a business and then going to a sleepover.
00:28:46
Yeah. That should be the, hey. Like half of them can't drive. Yeah. And then they're, so they're helping to close up, which is so sweet.
00:28:54
They're like, we'll help you mop so we can go hang out sooner. And so this was close to 11 p.m. when Amy and Sarah showed up.
00:29:03
And let's cut to midnight about an hour later after the clothes sign had been turned,
00:29:09
the front door was locked, and the man who owned the shop next door called Party House
00:29:14
spotted flames and smoke and called the fire department. Let's do the first picture.
00:29:20
Please. That's, I can't believe it's yogurt. Exclamation mark. Fucked up, right?
00:29:28
I mean, we really couldn't believe it was yogurt at the time. It just tasted so much like ice cream.
00:29:35
It was like, am I a Dairy Queen? This is insane. My life is so much better now. Yeah, and yogurt's healthy.
00:29:41
I eat it all the time. And you're a hippie. I mean, all these things. That's such a 90s crime scene photo.
00:29:48
Yeah. It's like such a bummer. It should have like the digital date down to the bottom.
00:29:53
Like your mom took the picture with her camera This is okay this is bad But I think what so crazy about it is that this is a really like almost suburban area and there like the strip malls and like it pretty safe and you don normally see
00:30:06
17 fire trucks at a spot, so I think everyone knew something was up. Yeah. Okay, you can take that off.
00:30:14
Thanks. Burn it. Oh. Oh, I didn't mean it like that. I didn't, sorry. Nope, no. That does not count against me this time.
00:30:28
Steven! Cut that. Steven, that never happened in reality. Fuck! Sorry. Okay, you can take it down because I want everyone staring at me and not that horrible photo.
00:30:43
Oh! No! Today's the day she turns into a diva. I've been waiting till Austin to really come out.
00:30:54
That's right. I hate you all. No, I love you all. Well, or we can leave it up. As they worked to put out the flames,
00:31:03
the building was, of course, trampled by many firefighters because they thought it was just a fire.
00:31:09
And then one of the firefighters went in the back door, spotted a human foot inside the back door of the storage room,
00:31:16
like, sticking out. And then shortly after that, they realized what was going on.
00:31:20
The bodies of Sarah, Jennifer, and Eliza were all found together in the storage area.
00:31:26
They'd all been stripped. This is so... They've all been stripped and two were bound
00:31:30
and three girls were shot in the back... And the three girls were shot in the back of the heads
00:31:33
with .22 calibers. Eliza and Sarah had been stacked upon each other and Jennifer was laying next to them,
00:31:39
possibly having been moved by the high-powered fire hoses that had swept the scene.
00:31:43
Oh. And then 13-year-old Amy was found a few minutes later lying alone. She was barely alive
00:31:51
and she was near the bathrooms. She had been initially shot with a .22 as well, but had survived that and was shot again with a .38,
00:32:00
and she died shortly after. Some of the girls had been raped, but it would be years before DNA testing would become available.
00:32:09
So investigators concluded that the fire was set to cover up the crime, and the culprits had drenched styrofoam cups with lighter fluid
00:32:16
and set them on fire. there was about $540 missing from the register but investigators didn't think the motive was robbery
00:32:24
because there was also a bank bag underneath the cash register and it had money in it
00:32:28
and nobody took it so I've been reading the book Who Killed These Girls by Beverly Lowry
00:32:35
which is a new book simply about this crime it's really good and don't read it before you go to bed
00:32:41
and so she says that some of the shortcomings of the less than experienced Austin PD.
00:32:48
They talk about that a lot. Fire and water damage, the lack of multiple victims,
00:32:54
the amount of people traipsing through the scene, all should have been handled by investigators
00:32:58
who had experience in these kind of crime scenes, but they weren't. Because Austin at the time didn't have that.
00:33:04
Well, so when you think it's a fire, you're not treating it like a crime scene. No.
00:33:08
It's the exact opposite of how you would treat a crime scene. Right. But as soon as that happened,
00:33:13
it should have been locked down. They should have gotten someone in who was injured.
00:33:16
you know, but anyways. The bodies weren't swabbed for traces of an accelerant. The bathrooms weren't dusted for fingerprints.
00:33:23
The trash bags weren't combed through. The metal shelves and mops that were next to the girls
00:33:28
when the fire started somehow ended up in the alley and then they disappeared, most likely taken to the dump.
00:33:34
So that's what happened. During the investigation, Darryl Croft, who seems like a badass,
00:33:41
he's a former cop who ran a security company now And he had been in the yogurt shop around 10 o'clock that evening buying yogurt.
00:33:51
And while he was there, he told investigators that he was approached by a man wearing a military fatigue-style jacket.
00:34:00
And he was telling the other customers to go ahead of him for some reason. And he asked Daryl if he was a cop because he saw his car that had lights, the security lights on it.
00:34:09
And when he said no, he offered Daryl to go ahead of him. and I think like a normal Texan man, he was like, no.
00:34:16
You know, like, gruff is go ahead kind of a thing. So Daryl said that when the man did go to the counter in front of him,
00:34:23
he ordered only a can of soda. And then after he paid, he moved around the counter
00:34:28
and went to the back of the store. And when Daryl asked where he'd gone, Eliza told him that she'd allowed him to go to the back to use the bathroom.
00:34:36
So she didn't know him. Daryl hung around the counter for a few minutes to see if the man ever returned, but he didn't.
00:34:43
He stayed in the back. And then Daryl said there was just something that didn't feel right.
00:34:47
And when the man just didn't return, Daryl left the store. That was around 10 p.m.
00:34:52
He's got to have some guilt. You know what I mean? I mean, what's... Oh. I didn't know what was...
00:34:58
What's everyone doing? There was a hubbub. Well, also, that's the thing of if he stays in the store,
00:35:04
now he's the weird guy in the store. Totally. But I think he knew them, the girls.
00:35:07
Oh, he did? Like, small town, he knew them. Even weirder. Well, yeah, he also, he went to the, he knew them for the gym, so that would be weird too.
00:35:15
Yeah, yeah, fair enough. There was also a couple, an older couple, that visited the store closer to closing time than Daryl on the same night of the murders.
00:35:26
They saw the two men, they saw two men sitting in a booth acting strangely. The woman said that they made her uncomfortable.
00:35:34
The couple left around 10.45 as the girls began to close up shop. They closed at 11.
00:35:40
and they left the two men alone in the shop. So the policy of the store was to lock the door 10 minutes before actual closing time,
00:35:48
but leave the key in the lock so everyone who's finishing up, you can just easily let them out,
00:35:53
but nobody new can come in so the door is locked So these two creepy dudes were the last customers in the store that night And about an hour later the fire was first noticed
00:36:05
So that's okay. Eight days after the murder, however, Jennifer, Eliza, Amy, and...
00:36:13
Sorry. Eight days after the murders, investigators picked up a 16-year-old kid named Maurice Pierce
00:36:21
at the North Cross Mall, which is just a couple blocks from the crime scene. He was carrying a .22 caliber handgun.
00:36:29
During questioning, he said that he'd lent the gun to a friend, Forrest Welburn, who was 15,
00:36:33
and that they'd used it to commit the yogurt shop murders. And Welburn denied any involvement but told investigators that he and Pierce and a pair of acquaintances,
00:36:44
Robert Springsteen and Mike Scott, had taken a joyride to San Antonio in a stolen SUV not long after the crime.
00:36:50
and so it put these two other boys, Robert and Mike, on the radar as well. I have a photo of it.
00:36:58
You can put it in the next one. No, that's not it. Here we go. That's them. It's like, it just reminds me of Paradise Lost.
00:37:09
Mm-hmm. Yeah. What do you think? Guilty or not guilty? Oh, shit. You're just saying that because of the mullet.
00:37:20
That's not fair. Anti-mollet. It made sense back then. I gotta cover your neck. Yeah, that's right.
00:37:31
Okay. So, so Wellborn's brought in for questioning by the detective. He passes a polygraph test.
00:37:38
The ballistics of the gun didn't match up to the bullets that had been used. There was no evidence to link any of them to the crime.
00:37:46
And detectives noted that Pierce seemed to have a mental illness. But anyways, they were dismissed as suspects, and the case stalled.
00:37:53
So it was Pierce, the one that said he did it? Yeah, and that has the mental illness.
00:37:57
So that's almost exactly the crime you just named. Paradise Lost. I was like, Innocence something.
00:38:08
It just happened, and we can't remember. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Okay.
00:38:13
So five years later, and around 342 suspects and 50 false confessions, or confessions that didn't pan out, a new detective, Paul Johnson, takes over.
00:38:26
And he, okay, obviously it's one of those, the city's freaking the fuck out, why haven't you caught the murders, you guys are inept, that sort of thing.
00:38:32
And so the cops do the thing that they always do, where they're like, it's this guy, you know, because they're like, we caught someone.
00:38:38
So Paul Johnson did that. he focused on the boys, the four boys. Let's see. He brought in Pierce, Scott Springsteen, and Wellborn
00:38:51
for questioning five years later. All of them denied any involvement in the murders at first,
00:38:55
but after a series of intense interrogations, Scott broke down and admitted that he helped carry out the murders,
00:39:02
saying he shot one of the girls in the head at Pierce's insistence. The police theory was that the four guys,
00:39:09
these four teenagers, planned to rob the yogurt shop. Three of them would go in, one of them would wait in the car,
00:39:15
but that something went right and the killing started. Then the detective that had originally dismissed the boys as suspect
00:39:21
was never consulted by the new cop. So in 1999, all four men charged with capital murder.
00:39:29
Springsteen admitted to shooting one of the girls, but Pierce and Wellmore never admitted to killing,
00:39:34
and they were let go. So the crazy one who started it all was let go. Despite having nothing but confessions to use against them,
00:39:41
which by then they had both recanted, saying that police had, of course, coerced their statements,
00:39:46
and there was even a photo of Paul Johnson holding a gun in the interrogation room
00:39:50
to the back of one of their heads. What? Yeah. Who took a picture of that? It's like a...
00:39:57
It was a selfie. It was surveillance video of the fucking thing. Oh, shit, yeah.
00:40:11
So, like, that's kind of coercion. Did he not know? I mean... Jesus. Well, he had already put people away
00:40:18
for false confessions that later were exonerated by DNA and people admitting to it,
00:40:23
so this was kind of his thing. And here he is now. Paul, you get to say your side of things.
00:40:32
I wonder what his hometown murder... is, um, okay. So, so, but they're sentenced to, so Springsteen's sentenced to death. Scott's
00:40:46
sentenced to life in prison without parole in 2001 and two. Then in 2007, new, so that was 2001,
00:40:54
new DNA evidence not available during the original trials revealed a male's DNA on the youngest
00:41:00
victim Amy. When the DNA was tested, it didn't match any of the four teens. Convictions were
00:41:07
overturned. The cases were thrown out more than 10 years after they were arrested.
00:41:12
So they were in jail for a decade? Yeah. All right. So what really happened? So it wasn't until 2011
00:41:23
that Carlos Garcia, the lead defense attorney for Mike Scott, put the crime scene photos into
00:41:30
sequence looking for details that he might have previously missed. This is fucking bananas. When
00:41:36
he looked closely at a specific crime scene photo. Go! Sorry, sorry. When he looked at a specific
00:41:48
crime scene photo of the dining area of the store, which wasn't that badly damaged by the fire,
00:41:53
it showed the room mostly clean for the night Tables had chairs stacked on them the napkin holders were full except for one table A booth in the back barely visible and also the booth that the elderly woman told the
00:42:07
investigators that the two sketchy men were sitting in close to closing time had no chairs on top of
00:42:12
it, and the napkin holder was empty. Okay, let's get the phone out. What, for real? Yeah. Right back there. Oh no.
00:42:22
Isn't that fucked up? I got chills like in the weirdest way up my neck when you said that.
00:42:29
Look at the napkin holder. It's fucking empty, man. Yeah. Dude. Every table has a chair on it.
00:42:38
Oh, so look at that picture. I can't believe that's yogurt. I fucking can't believe it.
00:42:44
Oh my God. So like, yeah, so they close and lock the door while these guys finish up.
00:42:50
But that cop in the office, he flips down that picture as he's like screaming aloud by himself.
00:42:56
I think everyone kind of went, oh, fuck, we really missed something. I think everyone kind of lost their mind.
00:43:02
So good for this dude fucking finding it. It's pretty amazing. So, so clearly they had been sitting there at closing time.
00:43:11
The girls were cleaning up around them. They let the last stragglers stay. and at 11 o'clock
00:43:18
the no sale button was pressed on the register. So that's when they think everything started.
00:43:26
They asked for change. They did something. They held a gun up to their faces probably.
00:43:30
I was like, give me all your money. That's true too. One of those. Change for the meter.
00:43:40
They started off nice. The fuck am I talking about? Can I get some quarters for the meter?
00:43:47
It's 11 o'clock at night, and I love yogurt. I still can't believe it's yogurt. I cannot believe this.
00:43:56
This is crazy. I need change. So the defense lawyers believe that's the table where the killer sat.
00:44:02
The key was still in the door when the fire started, which means the last customer had never been let out.
00:44:07
There was a rag on the counter of someone who had been wiping down the counter, and there was also an unopened can of Coke sitting near the register.
00:44:15
Remember he ordered a can of Coke? Oh, yeah. The guy who they found. And the register had no sale at 11 o'clock, and the money was stolen.
00:44:23
So that's when that probably started. And the killers likely escaped out of the back door after they started the fire.
00:44:29
So they had an hour to do all of this. Neither Daryl Croft or the older married couple were called to testify at the teen's trial.
00:44:36
So it's not known exactly what they saw because there's no testimony. So who killed these girls?
00:44:43
has, the book has a fucking detailed bananas theory and it made me sick and not be able to sleep. So if you're a creep
00:44:51
like me, go read it. Not, if you don't like crime scene photos, there's not a single one in there, but
00:44:57
it's like, reads like, okay. Yeah. Oh no, you talking about this before the picture came up, I was like,
00:45:03
oh, I want to go home. It's like something about that that's just so fucking, it's like the
00:45:09
thing that's there that people cannot see. You want to say like, how did they not say this? But like, I don't, would any of us? No. Like it doesn't mean, it doesn't necessarily
00:45:18
mean anything unless you put all of this stuff together. Like there was two guys who were there
00:45:22
at the end of it and like, and they didn't let people, you know, it's just. Well, also you have
00:45:27
the shock and horror of a town like this and then four teenage girls being brutally murdered in a,
00:45:35
in a way that's just, there's so much grief. There's so much horror and loss that like, I think
00:45:41
details always get missed in that situation because it's everyone's just going fix it solve
00:45:46
it right now this has to be over and everyone in town and I think a lot of I've read a lot of like
00:45:51
hometown murders that people wrote and they're like this is when we stopped being able to go out
00:45:55
this is when the town wasn't the same anymore and I remember being this age and it happening and it's
00:46:00
just it's such a horrible I mean I've been I've kind of followed it since it happened yeah and I
00:46:06
remember seeing that recently and it's just one of those things that keeps unfolding and getting
00:46:10
more and more gross and horrible. So many people think that the serial killer, Ken McDuff, was one of the men
00:46:21
in the yogurt stores that night. He had kidnapped and killed Colleen Reed on December 29th, 1991, in Austin with an accomplice.
00:46:30
That's 23 days after the yogurt shop murder. He had a history of multiple murders involving teenagers,
00:46:37
but he was soon ruled out of the crime, and I literally couldn't find anything more on this
00:46:42
than someone saying, he flat out said, had I done it, I would tell you because I'd be proud of it.
00:46:48
And then they're like, so it probably wasn't him. Goodbye. Like, it's so... I feel like that's a trick.
00:46:53
I feel like that's a trick he would use. Yeah. It's just, and it sounds, if you read about his,
00:46:59
and I was scared that maybe you were doing that murder and I was like stealing your, whatever.
00:47:03
So much fear around me. I know. Listen. but this guy is a fucking monster animal
00:47:10
and from the other crimes he's committed he is absolutely capable of the details
00:47:15
that I read about in the book this is a crime that is not for teenagers in my mind, it could be wrong
00:47:23
but it's this sadistic serial killer who got let out after 11 years as a known serial killer
00:47:28
because there was overcrowding in Texas prisons well yeah, let the serial killers go first
00:47:33
because there are people who smoke potty legally. So you've got to teach them. You've got to teach them.
00:47:43
It's so easy to have the answers when you have a pretty dress on and a great stool.
00:47:52
Yeah, so this Ken McDuff motherfucker is crazy. Well, that's incredible also that a suspect that big would be in town.
00:48:00
In town. And he killed this other girl with an accomplice. So he works with two people, like the two of them, regularly.
00:48:08
It just, it fits. And he's a rapist and he's just sadistic. So it doesn't, it adds up.
00:48:15
Yeah. But it's rumored that he admitted to, the day he was put to death, he, some people say he admitted to the yogurt shop murders.
00:48:25
So they think he did it. But what, jailhouse gossip? like no one can confirm it?
00:48:30
Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Ken. Detectives are, I know. This guy's a fucking creeper too.
00:48:38
If you see his photo, you're just like, oh, I would never like let you in my store.
00:48:41
I don't have it. Sorry. And I was trying so hard. There's like this guy, Daryl, has a description of what the guy looked like.
00:48:48
And I was taking, I was looking for photos of him and I was like, please have a pointy nose.
00:48:52
Please have a pointy nose. And he didn't. And I was like, well, I'm not showing that photo then.
00:48:55
He could have punched himself in the nose. It doesn't line up with what I want it to, so I'm not going to even acknowledge it, because I don't have to.
00:49:02
That's the way. Our podcast. That's the way. So detectives are still working on finding more evidence in the murders, but for now, it remains an unsolved mystery.
00:49:15
And I have the photo of the girls, if you want to see them. I know, I'm sorry. That's Amy right there.
00:49:20
That's Jennifer, her sister Sarah, and that's Eliza. Sweet baby angels. Isn't it horrifying?
00:49:27
They're sisters. We love sisters. I just, this one hurts me bad. I know. I'm sorry.
00:49:35
No, I mean. I hope yours is funny. Now pull us up. No, it's just like, that's what everybody looked like at my high school.
00:49:45
I know. We worked in, the yogurt shop we worked at, it was because the Knowles sisters worked there.
00:49:50
And so we, it was like, oh, do you want to work at the yogurt shop? Susie Knowles can get you a job there.
00:49:54
Well, that's what happened with these two girls. They were best friends. And she's like, let me get you the job at the yogurt shop.
00:49:59
And I wasn't going to post the photo because it's so sad. But I'm like, that's not fair to them.
00:50:03
You got to like acknowledge. We got to power through it. Yeah. It's just, yeah, it could be all of us and any of us.
00:50:12
I know. Yeah. So that's the yogurt shop murders. You're not as excited as you were in the beginning.
00:50:18
I can tell. See how fucked up these live shows are? That guy's leaving. He can't fucking take it.
00:50:24
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You too? Oh, we're fucked. The whole fucking front row.
00:50:32
This is bullshit. They're like, actually, we could just see George's underwear and it's freaking us out a little bit.
00:50:37
So we're going to go stand in the back. We're fine with the murder. It's just that where are you getting those stripes?
00:50:42
Yeah, those are clearly from four years ago. At least two years ago. Every once in a while, pick up a pair that's literally there's like weird shreds coming off of them.
00:50:53
where you're just like, well, first of all, A, where did I buy these? And secondly, did I only pay 99 cents for them?
00:50:59
And why won't I throw them away? Everything you're saying. And then I think about friends who buy expensive lingerie,
00:51:08
and then I pull out underwear, and it's got the target. You know when you rip the tag off, and it has the thread still in it?
00:51:13
I don't cut that out. It's just like all of my underwear have a little thread from the tag I pulled off on it.
00:51:20
And that's just what I do. I want to know that people who wear like fancy lingerie around.
00:51:28
So what kind of day do you have where that's, that's something that you can make work underneath until the nighttime?
00:51:37
I don't. If I lived alone and when I did, oh, they would just be a mess. I would wear them.
00:51:42
Like I wear somewhat not. I have to throw them away sometimes because I'm like, Vince is going to think I'm this person.
00:51:47
But I totally am that person. and he just wears seven-year-old underwear. I don't know.
00:51:53
I mean, sometimes it feels like a victory to have seven-year-old underwear. You pick it up, and then you're just like,
00:51:59
oh my God, remember when you had fucking purple hair or whatever? Yeah. Very good memories in these.
00:52:09
Moving on. That was a sidebar. Yeah, underwear sidebar. Georgia I'm so excited to get to ask you this question right now do you have any updates on
00:52:23
this case I freaking do okay we were at a live show in Salt Lake City just recently Karen you
00:52:31
walked into my dressing room right next door to yours holding your phone up and going oh my god
00:52:37
and I was like okay either there's some gossip to tell me or something got solved because it
00:52:43
reminded me of when you told me about the Golden State Killer being found. I jumped up and got out
00:52:48
of my seat. So full credit to the person who added me on TikTok to basically be like the second the
00:52:55
clip went up on TikTok, someone added me. So I opened up my messages and saw it. And so I just
00:53:01
saw it and couldn't believe it. So I jumped up to go tell you, but then I didn't know what the best
00:53:08
as I was starting to think. I was like, I'm not going to yell it at her. I want her to read it.
00:53:13
I want her to have her own experience with it. I don't want to whatever. So I just walked in going, oh, my God, oh, my God.
00:53:18
Which, of course, if you did that to me, I would think someone died. And I would get really mad at you for not.
00:53:21
Right. So I did it kind of the worst way you could do it. And you showed me your screen.
00:53:28
We were both going, oh, my God, oh, my God. And poor Vince sitting on the couch behind us.
00:53:32
Because he and I had just watched the documentary together, too. And he knew that that was like the case that always stuck with me.
00:53:39
He knows that. We had just watched the documentary about it. So meanwhile, he's sitting behind us and doesn't know what either of us are fucking talking about.
00:53:46
So then I got to turn to him and go, the fucking yogurt shop murders have been solved.
00:53:51
I did it to you and then we did it to him. That's right. But it is that kind of thing of how would you have liked to get that news if I just screamed the yogurt shop murders That was perfect That fine Read it for yourself But then I can come in going oh my God oh my God
00:54:05
Because I was just. That's always fun. I love an oh, my God, oh, my God moment. I was blown away.
00:54:10
I just couldn't after all this time. And it felt like the most hopeless one. And then now that detective gets to wear the shirt.
00:54:18
And we got to go on stage like 10 minutes later and fucking tell the audience. like most of whom didn't know because they were like getting into this you know the theater and
00:54:27
sitting down and getting their drinks and stuff so most of them didn't know and we got to come
00:54:32
right out and fucking say it on stage that was like live show breaking news oh so good it was
00:54:37
all right let me give you some updates so on september 26 2025 austin police announced that
00:54:42
they finally identified the man they believe murdered eliza thomas amy ayers and sisters
00:54:47
Jennifer and Sarah Harbison. The police say that they did this, quote, through a wide range of DNA
00:54:53
testing. In June of this year, 2025, investigators were able to match a bullet casing found in a
00:54:59
drain at the yogurt shop to a casing left behind in another unsolved murder, which took place in
00:55:05
1998 in Kentucky. And this didn't point to the culprit's identity because it was also unsolved,
00:55:11
but it provided some movement in the case. You know, suddenly there's a whole nother case to use
00:55:16
as evidence. And the big break came in August of this year when Austin detective asked labs around
00:55:22
the country that do what's called Y-STR typing, which involves male-specific Y-chromosome DNA,
00:55:30
to manually search through their database for a potential hit. And a lab in South Carolina
00:55:35
reported a one-to-one match with DNA left in a 1990 sexual assault and murder in Greenville,
00:55:41
South Carolina, with Austin police's lead detective on the case, Daniel Jackson, saying,
00:55:47
quote, the full profile and every allele was the same. Oh my God, the chills they must have gotten
00:55:52
when they fucking- Crazy. So that specific DNA profile belongs to a man named Robert Eugene Brashers,
00:55:59
who took his own life during a standoff with police in 1999. Detective Jackson says that the
00:56:04
DNA has now linked Brashers to, quote, unsolved murders and sexual assaults across the country.
00:56:11
end quote with some outlets calling him a serial killer yeah we're gonna find out so much more
00:56:16
about him i feel like and and the cases he is linked to yeah authorities have also compared
00:56:22
the bullet casing found at the yogurt shop with the gun brashers used to kill himself
00:56:26
the specific type of shell casing is described as consistent with brashers gun and so this update
00:56:32
brings long-awaited closure for eliza amy jennifer and sarah's loved ones on september 29th at a
00:56:39
news conference, Jennifer and Sarah's mom, Barbara, said, quote, I'm full of gratitude.
00:56:44
It's been so long and all we ever wanted for this case was the truth. We never wanted anyone to go
00:56:49
to jail or to be charged with anything they did not do. Vengeance was never it. It was always
00:56:55
the truth. Definitely watch the documentary that just came out on HBO called The Yogurt Shop
00:57:00
Murders. I mean, this is just monumental. It's incredible. It really is. And also just that idea
00:57:08
of what they asked, like what the homicide department in Austin asked people to do to
00:57:15
get different results. It's that thing of like, it really does feel to me like cold case detectives.
00:57:22
They're standing for new policing because they have to go back and be like, what mistakes did
00:57:26
we make last time that we're not going to make this time? Right. And to be able to have that
00:57:30
humility to do that, to admit mistakes, to start over, to contradict themselves and the people who
00:57:38
came before them. Yeah. That takes a lot of humility, I think. And so to do that is really,
00:57:44
you know, incredible and get new results and admit wrong. It reminds me of the Portland police who
00:57:51
made the public statement that they would be protecting protesters and not ICE agents at
00:57:56
any future events happening in Portland. And a girl on TikTok made this video. She goes,
00:58:03
I just got to say, police, you have a great opportunity here to turn it around and stop
00:58:08
Being the villain and start actually doing stuff that the people need you to be doing.
00:58:12
Serve and protect people in a real way. Yeah, for sure. So incredible. We're so excited to bring that update to you guys.
00:58:19
So great. All right. Well, here's another horrifying one and another legendary one.
00:58:24
This is Karen's story about the servant girl annihilator. Picture this. The power goes out, your phone's at 50%, and suddenly your home is cold, dark, and you can't cook a thing.
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00:59:33
Well, because we're in Austin, I'm going to do the servant girl annihilator. Yeah.
00:59:41
Right? It's the one that, listen, if you Google Austin serial killer, that's what comes up.
00:59:47
It's like the first seven results. And this will lighten the mood a little, I feel like.
00:59:52
What'd you say? I think this will lighten the mood a little bit. Yes, for sure. Yeah Vintage murders everyone like okay Vintage there annihilation it what everybody likes All right Sometimes when I writing this and I under pressure because it 5
01:00:12
and we have to be here at 6, because the show starts at 7. I emailed this to Vince at, like, 5.45.
01:00:19
I was like, can you print this for me? Do you find that you're more, you let yourself be more
01:00:23
flowery and interesting as you write your, as you put it together? No, I started it like two weeks ago and I was like, this is going to be so detailed and interesting.
01:00:32
And then I kept going back and be like, I don't have as much stuff as I thought I did.
01:00:35
And like, fuck, and like copying and pasting shit. Oh, okay. No. Oh, because I get, well, my only point was just, I do stuff like, the year of 1885
01:00:45
was a difficult one for Austin, Texas. Now that guy leaves. It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
01:01:00
He was just here with his girlfriend anyway. He's never been into it. Now she has to watch football.
01:01:06
It's a trade-off thing. It happens a lot. Or wrestling, maybe. Yeah, maybe some wrestling.
01:01:12
Maybe professional wrestling. Okay. In 1885, here in your beautiful town, there was an unprecedented axe murder crime spree that had the entire city in a panic.
01:01:26
By the end of the year, there was a citywide curfew. Strangers were forced to identify themselves or be run out of town.
01:01:33
Georgia! You're just like, it's Karen. Karen, my middle name's Lynn. No, out, out. We don't know you.
01:01:43
Citizens formed a vigilance committee to patrol the streets at night. downtown saloons were being forced to close at midnight.
01:01:51
What? Insanity. The horror. It said saloons and other raucous businesses. What's that, you guys?
01:02:01
Yeah, it's like... Whorehouse. We're talking about whores up. I mean... Sex worker house.
01:02:07
Sex workers apartment building. at one point the city hired pinkerton detectives to come and try to find this man but they couldn't
01:02:21
do it if the pinkerton people can't find it if the pinkertons can't find it 400 men were arrested
01:02:28
no one was ever officially charged for all the crimes to this day no one knows for sure who the
01:02:35
servant girl annihilator was. So it all started on the night of December 30th, 1884 at
01:02:41
901 West Pecan Street, or Pecan. I don't know how you guys do it. Pecan? Pecan? I say pecan.
01:02:51
Pecorn? It's Pecorn. Okay. It's actually, it said Almond. Oh, Almond Street. Sorry, I'm from California.
01:03:02
901 West Pecran Street. A 25-year-old woman named Molly Smith, who was working in that household as a cook, was attacked with an axe while she slept.
01:03:14
Then, the intruder dragged her unconscious body out of the house, into the backyard, raped her, and then murdered her in the backyard.
01:03:24
Why? I mean, why to a lot of that? No, just, yeah, philosophically and emotionally.
01:03:33
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And then also just stay inside. Just stay inside. That was my main why, but that sounds shitty.
01:03:41
Is that the main why? Yeah. I actually really wanted to, but it turns out I had to take a shower.
01:03:47
I wanted to do a thing where I looked at when the full moons were, because there's a lot of theories about that part of it.
01:03:56
When this gets really bad and this axe murderer in your town repeatedly kills a ton of people,
01:04:04
everybody goes nuts with the theories. And it's kind of awesome. Okay, so we'll get to it a little bit.
01:04:08
So Molly was the first victim five months later on May 7th, 1885 at 302 East Cypress Street.
01:04:15
Dr. Lucian B. Johnson has employed a cook named Eliza Shelley. Eliza is a 30-year-old mother of two young children.
01:04:23
One is six years old named Georgia. Oh, my God. and one is six months old. Eliza's husband is in prison,
01:04:31
and she lives in Dr. Johnson's home, working for them with her children, and she is described later as an excellent woman.
01:04:43
On the night of May 7th, an intruder breaks in and attacks Eliza as she sleeps, murdering her with an axe.
01:04:52
So two weeks later, on May 23rd, at 302 East Linden Street in the home of Sophia Whitman.
01:05:01
So basically Sophia had her house up in the front and then there were apartments in the back.
01:05:06
And back there, a widow named Irene Cross lived with her son Washington and her nine-year-old nephew Douglas.
01:05:12
Do you think Douglas Washington? No, Washington was the other son's guy. Sorry. It's okay.
01:05:22
We've got to be able to talk about stuff like this. So that night, same intruder breaks into Irene's apartment, murders her in bed with a knife.
01:05:35
Her son, Washington, who was adult, I think he was 24, was gone. He was out for the night.
01:05:40
Douglas, the nine-year-old nephew, is one of the only real eyewitnesses of the servant girl annihilator.
01:05:48
And when he talked to the police he described to the police the person he saw was quote a big chunky man who was barefooted with his pants rolled up What So three months go by Now we at 300 East Cedar Street
01:06:06
and it's the home of a man named Valentine Weed. It's all one wants for Valentine.
01:06:12
I mean, only great things are happening in that house. With Valentine Weed. She's so pissed.
01:06:22
And this house is exactly a block north of where Eliza Kelly was murdered. So a woman named Rebecca Ramey, who was a 50-year-old widowed mother of three,
01:06:35
got her job as a domestic servant for the weed family. She lived on the property with her 11-year-old daughter, Mary.
01:06:45
And Rebecca actually came from a very prominent Austin family. her brother Edward Carrington ran the Carrington grocery store,
01:06:53
which was one of the first black owned businesses in Austin. And she also had another brother who ran the nearby blacksmith shop.
01:07:00
I couldn't find, I couldn't drag and drop this picture to give it to Stephen to put in our thing.
01:07:05
Oh, I bet I have a picture too. You can throw up really whatever you have. Oh, look, there's your town.
01:07:11
Remember when it was just a grid? Where are we? It was so easy to ride your bike around.
01:07:19
With your big beard or whatever. Well, but there was a picture of Rebecca's family.
01:07:32
And they all had these amazing, like, you know, like the Coke model lady. They all had, like, those tiny waist, high neck dresses with a big hat.
01:07:42
Oh, shit. Super, like, you know, don't fuck with me. It was awesome. Okay, so she...
01:07:47
Um, she is, uh, when she is widowed, she has to start working for herself. So she gets this job and, uh, she works for the weeds.
01:07:59
Uh, so dumb. Okay. So horrible pun, but I'm not gonna, well, do it, do it. An intruder breaks into her bedroom window, beats her until she's unconscious, then goes
01:08:11
into 11 year old Mary's room, drags her out into the backyard, rapes her and murders her
01:08:16
with a fucking axe. All right. Fuck. So this is when the rumors begin because people start talking about
01:08:26
this must be a supernatural being because everyone's saying that the night these attacks occur,
01:08:32
no dogs bark. So there are dogs in the next door neighbor's yards. When he pulls people out
01:08:38
into those yards, no dogs are barking and they can't figure out why. He gave a mistake.
01:08:45
Oh. For a mistake. Well, hold on a second. I just solved the motherfucking crime.
01:08:50
Well, good night, everybody. Thanks so much. I mean, you guys have seen cartoons, right?
01:08:56
Where they try to sneak in and they're just like, there's a T-bone, you know? A steak and then the dog eats it and pulls out a cat skeleton.
01:09:04
I mean, fish skeleton. Forget it. All right. Okay. Okay. So among those, because also there was many nights,
01:09:14
it was either a full moon or there was just a lot of moonlight. So people don't understand how this person is getting away with it.
01:09:21
A lot of people think he might be invisible. There's an invisibility factor to it.
01:09:29
Look, here he is now. Nothing. Moving on. Why is every page upside down? It doesn't make sense.
01:09:42
I'm trying to do this right. A month later, on the night of... Is that right? Yes.
01:09:50
Yes, his three months went by. So a month later, and this is also that thing, they're spaced out in this really interesting way
01:09:55
where he has a bunch of murders, then rests for three months and has it. Classic serial killer.
01:10:00
On the night of September 28th, at the residence of William B. Dunham's house, it's at 2408 Guadalupe Street.
01:10:10
Do you live there? Guadalupe? I'm not talking to you anymore. So, man, this is why I was nervous about Texas.
01:10:26
Oh, this is nothing compared to what we had before. That's true. So, in this house, in the back, there's a cabin in the back of the house where 25-year-old Orange Washington and his girlfriend, 20-year-old Gracie Vance, are sleeping.
01:10:41
and the intruder once again breaks in and he murders Orange in his sleep and then drags Gracie into the backyard,
01:10:51
rapes her and murders her. Three months later, Christmas Eve, at 203 Water Street,
01:10:58
it's the home of Moses Hancock. So 41-year-old Susan Hancock, who is the mother of two girls,
01:11:05
it's Christmas Eve, they're out at a Christmas party and she is asleep in one of their rooms.
01:11:10
It's not a happy marriage. Moses is asleep in the other room. Let's not talk about it.
01:11:15
It's none of our business. So an intruder breaks into the house, into the room, grabs her,
01:11:23
drags her into the backyard. What the fuck is up with that? Right? He wants to be outside.
01:11:28
Creepy. He wants to be under the moon like a fucking werewolf, which brings us back to the supernatural element
01:11:35
of trying to introduce him to this podcast. In two months we're gonna be all werewolves. I can't wait.
01:11:42
And no one ever listened again. Okay, so her husband Moses is sleeping in the other room.
01:11:53
He wakes up because he hears a noise, goes outside, there's a man murdering his wife in the backyard.
01:12:00
tries to attack the man. The man turns around, starts hitting him with the axe, and then runs away.
01:12:05
So he's very badly injured. Four days later, Mrs. Hancock dies from her injuries.
01:12:11
So then when he recovers, Mr. Hancock is arrested for the murder of his wife. Yes, yes.
01:12:18
He got a fucking hatchet in the face. Yeah, but anyone can do that. His daughters both come to his defense.
01:12:27
They say he's never been, he's a lovely father. He's never been bad to any of us.
01:12:31
But a family of Susan Hancock attests that Moses was a vicious drunk and that Susan was about to leave him.
01:12:39
And later they find this letter that she wrote to him but never gave to him in her belongings that read,
01:12:45
Dear husband, I've lived with you for 18 years and have always tried to make you a good wife and help you all I could.
01:12:51
I've loved you and followed you day and night. You won't quit whiskey and I am so nervous I can't stand it.
01:12:56
You know, it almost kills me for you to drink. and Lena is almost crazy and will lose her mind.
01:13:01
She fucking puts it on her daughter. Lena is a nut. And it's your fault. If I was to do anything to disgrace you and our children,
01:13:11
you would leave me. You would have quit me long ago. Which is a good point. And then she says, take care of yourself.
01:13:18
Write me at Waco. I will answer every letter. Your wife until death, Sue Hancock.
01:13:23
But then she doesn't leave him. She stays. Oh, honey. So everyone's like, oh, how convenient that now your wife has been murdered in the backyard.
01:13:33
But Moses Hancock is never convicted for the murder of his wife. On the very same night, Christmas Eve, at 302 Hickory Street, Eula Phillips, who is a 17-year-old wife and mother of one.
01:13:47
What the fuck? Oh, want to hear about it? She got married off in an arranged marriage when she was 14.
01:13:56
and then had a baby a year later. And so, strangely enough, it turned out she wasn't that happy in the marriage
01:14:05
because she had to marry a guy that was, I think he was 21 when she was 14. I mean, it doesn't matter what age.
01:14:14
It sucks. Doesn't it? It sucks. Yeah. Yeah. It does matter a little bit. Yeah, that's right.
01:14:22
That's right. You're right. we've gone into an area where when you're 14, you probably have a retainer
01:14:31
and you won't stop talking about Skittles and you shouldn't have your own baby. Uh-huh.
01:14:39
Maybe. Some do it and some do it great. Anyway. So she had actually already taken the baby
01:14:47
and left her husband, James, because he was also a huge drinker. What's going on, Austin?
01:14:53
It's all anyone did in the 1800s. And still do. Rock on. Then single sad tear for me not being able to.
01:15:05
I had all mine already. Not me. Barfs red wine. Pull out a drink from down here.
01:15:15
Okay, so she left him and while she was gone, And she ended up having an affair with a wealthy, well-connected man named John Dickinson.
01:15:24
Got it, girl. But then James... That's right. But then James got a job. He stopped drinking, got his whole act together.
01:15:34
And he went and found her. And he was like, please take me back. I want to make this work.
01:15:37
Are you wealthy yet? No. And she's like, well, I'm 17, so okay. So she goes back.
01:15:46
but then this night on this night of Christmas Eve she had snuck out of the house and she
01:15:52
had gone to one of the basically the 1800s version of a no-tell motel and they didn't, no one knows who
01:16:00
she was going there to meet but she went there, asked for a room and the person that ran it said
01:16:06
no rooms tonight and so she went back home and within an hour she was dead she was attacked with an axe while she was sleeping She was dragged into the backyard She was raped and murdered Her husband heard her being attacked runs outside He also attacked and he very badly wounded
01:16:25
but he is arrested, tried, and convicted for her murder. Whoa. Do we think he did it?
01:16:30
No. Okay. No. The prosecution painted him as a violent, jealous drunk, but eventually the case is overturned
01:16:39
because his lawyer argues that he never knew about her affair, so how could he be jealous?
01:16:47
Hey! All right. Wrap that up. Nice little... Easy peasy, you old drunk. Okay. So here's a couple things, a couple interesting trivia facts.
01:16:59
All of the victims that were left behind, that their husbands didn't come upon them,
01:17:08
they were all posed in the same manner. I could not find what that manner was on the internet.
01:17:14
Maybe someone knows. I like to picture it was kind of a beachy thing like this, but that's more of a defense mechanism
01:17:20
because this is fucking horrifying. This is worse. Six of the murdered women had a sharp object
01:17:27
inserted into their ear. Ear? The worst. Oh, ear. The worst. Ow, ow. Have you ever, like, yeah.
01:17:36
It's not the same thing as dabbing yourself with a Q-tip Georgia. Like, just don't even say it out loud.
01:17:41
But it's so bad that that's as bad as you want to imagine it being. That's how bad that is.
01:17:47
Yeah, that's all I can even go to. Here's my favorite. At several of the crime scenes, bloody footprints were found.
01:17:55
And the right foot was missing a left toe. Ooh. No, that doesn't work. The right foot was missing a big toe.
01:18:09
Shut the fuck up. Oh my God. Perfectionism with the words and the details. I didn't catch it.
01:18:18
I was like, uh-huh. It's right there. I wrote it right there on the page. Do-do-do.
01:18:23
Oh, I'm on the page missing a left toe. I can do it whenever I want. Even 20 minutes before.
01:18:28
Left toe. Send. Print. record forever if you guys hadn't made a collective austin-based groan we would have been like great no left toe
01:18:44
sounds good if you're new to the podcast this is basically what it's like what happened just now
01:18:50
someone saying something wrong the other one not knowing it and then moving on it's like living
01:18:55
Twitter. But the best kind. Okay. There were lots of quote-unquote eyewitnesses during this murder spree.
01:19:05
So the killer was variously reported to have been a white or dark complexioned or yellow man
01:19:13
wearing lamp black to conceal his actual skin color which is because there were so many lamps around. So you were just like
01:19:23
Did it do? So many murders. He was also described as a man wearing a Mother Hubbard style dress.
01:19:33
Why is that so much worse? Yes. This is your kind of story. Is Mother Hubbard, no, that's Mother Goose is the one with all the kids underneath.
01:19:45
He's like, I'm an axe murderer and I have children under my dress. Oh, no. How fucked up is that?
01:19:51
They're into it. They're into murder too. And they all come out and they're like, they love murder.
01:19:56
Fuck. He was also described as being a man wearing a slouch hat. That's pretty hip.
01:20:03
I don't know what that is. What if it's just a cat in a hat? That motherfucker. He's always up to no good.
01:20:13
It's just a cat in a hat. Like, I did some murders in the 1800s. No big deal. Whoop, fishbowl.
01:20:19
Also, a man wearing a hat and a white rag that covered the lower part of his face.
01:20:28
That the elephant man Get it together eyewitnesses There is also a story about a Malay cook I assuming that means Malaysian but I not sure
01:20:41
So the story was that there was a Malay cook calling himself Maurice. Had to. Had to. Can't not.
01:20:52
He had worked at the Pearl House in 1885, and he left sometime in January of 1886,
01:20:58
which is exactly the time frame of these axe murders. And the last, in the killing of Miss Hancock and Miss Eula Phillips,
01:21:08
the former occurred on Christmas Eve. That was just before the Malay departed. And then that's when the murders ended.
01:21:17
Wow. So they think he did it. And they also think that he went, he got on a boat and he went to England and he became...
01:21:26
came. Jack the Ripper! Oh my god! Shut up. Don't you love it? I love it. The Malay that you
01:21:38
never saw coming is actually the star of the show? Oh my god. Just a low-key Malay named Maurice that's like
01:21:46
guess fucking what? My name's not Jack. But people love to theorize. Don't we? Especially when we don't know anything that's real.
01:21:58
Okay. I also introduced the idea that the servant girl annihilator could also be the Axeman of New Orleans.
01:22:06
Yeah. Remember that? That was my very bold and brave theory that I pulled off of Wikipedia.
01:22:13
Because he was doing it in 1914, 1916. Who knows? All competing theories, anything's possible.
01:22:23
here's the most interesting of all. I love it. In February of 1886 at a saloon in East Austin a
01:22:31
19 year old cook named Nathan Elgin was verbally and then physically attacking a woman in a bar with such
01:22:39
viciousness that it scared the rest of the patrons of the bar into silence. Oh my god. He then
01:22:45
dragged her out of the bar and down the street to his sister's house and inside What? Can you?
01:22:53
Oh my God. Right? So many questions. Yeah. Of how are you just sitting there? Yeah.
01:22:59
Right. Okay, go on. But also how scary was that guy that everyone's like, I've got two guns right now and I'm still too scared to go after you.
01:23:08
I'm made of guns. It's what I do for a living. I'm a cowboy in Austin, Texas. You go ahead and take her.
01:23:16
That's fine. so the barkeeper and another man uh chase him and somebody else goes and gets the sheriff they all
01:23:27
end up at this house and inside he's attacking this woman he's on her um he's got a knife and
01:23:34
um they start to tussle with him he basically essentially brandishes the knife and the sheriff
01:23:40
shoots him dead i think i have a picture of that sheriff if you want to skip ahead it's pretty epic
01:23:45
okay that him? no it's not there he is oh shit we saw him walking down the street today
01:23:57
remember? now he roasts coffee beans for a living but he used to be the sheriff wow
01:24:06
I love him so much the Austin vampire the hip vampire that's been alive for 10,000 years.
01:24:16
Just doing right by everybody. Anyhow, here's the thing. He shoots him. I had his name on here somewhere.
01:24:24
It's long gone. The sheriff shoots this guy and then when they take off his shoe,
01:24:31
no big toe on his right foot, motherfuckers. Yes. No, it was him. It's totally him.
01:24:37
Well, they don't know and they couldn't prove it because the guy was dead, but there were no more axe murders
01:24:43
after that day. Poor Malaysian guy's like, that kind of drove me out of Austin I really wanted to stay here I never killed anyone And this guy Who Maurice He beating people in public Maurice Maurice is like it freezing in London What the fuck you guys
01:25:00
I was a really good cook. Yeah. It's rude. Wow. Yeah. Dude. Yeah. That's it. Sorry.
01:25:11
Thank you. That was great. Okay, we're back. Are there any updates on this case, Karen?
01:25:21
There is one, basically. In 2017, archivists uncovered a few old forgotten files related to this case in a Travis County warehouse.
01:25:30
Wow. Oh, yeah. Chills. Truly. And they include an inquest of victim's diary and court records from two trials.
01:25:38
They don't shed any new light on the murders, but they were put on display. Wow.
01:25:43
But I mean, to me, it's like, yes, that's true. But maybe there's something in there.
01:25:47
There could be. There still could be. Yeah. I mean, that intern who's just like doing the filing back then lost her mind.
01:25:54
It's got to be a her. It's got to be a her. It's got to be the kind of person that's like, what's this box back here?
01:25:59
Totally. Might as well look in here. I love organization. Just the idea. This reminds me of the man from the train in that way where it's like a true monster at large.
01:26:08
In a time where people didn't really consider that as much. They were like, I just want maple syrup and a good Bible.
01:26:15
Totally. You know what I mean? It was all very simple. And then there's these monsters.
01:26:19
Who are easily able to, like, just blend right in and disappear. Yes. And horrible axe murder women.
01:26:26
Fucking insane. Yeah. Well, now let's head back to the Paramount. We're going to wrap up this live show.
01:26:34
You guys, we don't have time to do a hometown murder. And we're so sorry. I know.
01:26:38
You can't yell no. You're not allowed to. And I'm so bummed because I know from Twitter that we have a crime scene investigator in the fucking office.
01:26:46
I'm so in the office. Can we bring the house lights up for one second just so we can look at a crime scene investigator in real life?
01:26:51
Can we turn them up and see her? Just slightly, slightly. And then don't stand up if you're not a crime scene investigator.
01:26:56
Where is she? There she is. Hi. I'm going to call you. We're sorry. She's wearing a toxic masculinity shirt.
01:27:05
I bet she can't wear that to work. I almost said it's cool. Can I just ask you a quick question?
01:27:10
Don't answer for her. Do you steal crime scene tape and they'll take it to your home
01:27:15
like we do post-it notes? Do you just... No. She's not talking to me. We're very excited you're here.
01:27:31
Thank you for sending us that message. It's always very exciting when actual professionals are like,
01:27:37
we don't hate what you're doing. It's very fun. So this episode was originally entitled Live at the Moon Tower Comedy Festival.
01:27:48
Kind of a gimme. That's right. But if we were naming it today based on something said in the episode, maybe we would name it
01:27:55
The Job Stoppers. Yeah. Neck tattoos. Yeah. Or Ours and Ours Alone, which was basically our thing of surprising each other with stories.
01:28:05
That's right. Or Penicillin of America. Frozen yogurt. Yes. Yes, that's so true.
01:28:12
That's a good one. Let's do that one. Okay, well, thanks, you guys, for listening to another episode of Rewind.
01:28:17
We appreciate you. And let's go back and say goodbye from the Paramount Theater.
01:28:25
We're going to be back here a lot, I feel like. We really love Austin. Texas! How can we not?
01:28:31
You guys have so much murder in this state that we could do the rest of our shows here
01:28:37
and we'd be fine. It'd be very cool. And you guys are awesome. And our numbers are so bafflingly high in Texas
01:28:44
that all the people that work at Feral are like, are one of you from Texas? Like, why?
01:28:50
And we don't know, but we love you for it. Yeah, thanks, guys. Thank you so much, you guys.
01:28:55
Thank you. Stay sexy. And don't get harder! Bye.