00:00:00
Hey weirdos, I'm Ash. And I'm Elena. And it's time for a [ __ ] new moon bonus. [music]
00:00:22
>> Time [ __ ] >> We've been so excited for this. I'm [ __ ] lit right now. >> It's about to get cuckoo nuts bananas up
00:00:33
in this [ __ ] >> It's about You're about to sit in a chair for four months. [laughter]
00:00:38
>> Is what you're about to do. >> There's a possibility. >> There is a possibility that you will Can
00:00:44
I listen? We're just going to jump right in. >> Yeah. At one point she's looking out
00:00:48
that window. I think it's in October and there's just rand like that's her sideyard.
00:00:52
>> Yeah. There's a whole family walking through her yard. >> Why? And they we are to we are to
00:00:58
believe that they that there are woods right there. So I'm like >> they just emerge from where they come
00:01:04
from. Like why are they just walking outside of your I always think that when I see
00:01:07
>> Halloween goes nuts I guess. >> Yeah. We're uh we're we're talking about new moon. Everybody
00:01:13
>> I hope you watched. I hope you read. I hope you got the illustrated guide. I hope you've been on Stephy's website.
00:01:19
>> I hope you have. >> I hope you've done it all. But the good news is if you've done none of those
00:01:24
things, we've done it for you. >> Here we are. [laughter] >> Here we are, [ __ ]
00:01:29
>> Uh, it came out in 2009. >> 2009. >> 2009. This one's directed by Chris Whites this time, not Catherine
00:01:37
Hardwick. Apparently, it was the short production time that got her cuz she didn't want to have to like she didn't
00:01:43
think she could get the story with script right in like because it was like a year or something.
00:01:47
>> It was very quick. It was a real quick turnaround. Yeah. Um, so that's interesting. This one
00:01:54
we also got I mean this one has a banger soundtrack as well. >> This I think of all the movies this one
00:02:00
has my favorite soundtrack. >> Really? Yeah. I think maybe >> I think so. Yeah. >> I really like the first soundtrack.
00:02:06
>> I like the second one better. But I do like the first one. >> I mean this one has death cab for cutie.
00:02:10
>> How can you go wrong? >> Tom York. It's got Muse. Oh, I belong to you. The new moon remix. Remix.
00:02:20
remix. >> That's honestly where it's at. And then you have the It's a possibility.
00:02:24
[singing] >> Was that Licky Lee? >> Yeah. Yep. And it's called Possibility. >> Possibility. Look it up. [laughter]
00:02:31
>> There's also that one. Okay. Go, I think. Shooting the moon. >> Oh, yeah. You're right.
00:02:38
>> Loved that song. >> That's a good one, too. >> Oh, >> damn. All right. We really We're killing
00:02:43
it with this. And Meet Me on the Equinox by Death Cap for Cutie. Banger. >> So, of a time. Yeah, it will transport
00:02:50
you right back there. >> It's a very hipster time. >> Oh, yeah. >> Of skinny time.
00:02:55
>> And scarves like the cloth scarves and that one jacket that everybody had. >> Yeah, that one jacket. I know exactly
00:03:02
what you're talking about. Yeah. >> Or like gray sometimes. >> Yep. It could be gray. It could be
00:03:07
green. >> Mhm. >> But damn, everything just killing it. >> We loved it. And you know, they they
00:03:15
seem to have gotten um Bella's hair is really right in this one. >> And do you know how much awfuler it's
00:03:24
going to get, though? >> Yeah. >> Her hair's so good in this movie. >> Yeah. >> The next movie, her hair, we
00:03:32
>> everywhere. >> Her hair is something infidelities. >> Her hair is absolutely screaming
00:03:36
[laughter] infidelities. And >> yeah, >> I don't know. I don't know. Um, what's interesting to me is I think Al doesn't
00:03:46
Alice's hair look longer in this one. >> In this one, yeah, it does a little bit.
00:03:50
>> Um, according to the illustrated guide, hair doesn't grow if you're a vampire.
00:03:55
So, I'm not really sure how that happened. >> Maybe she's just styling it differently.
00:03:59
>> Maybe. >> Maybe. >> Who can be sure? I'm trying to think of Oh, Rosaly in this one. Goddess.
00:04:05
Goddess. >> She looks amazing. She >> honestly she looks amazing in everything. >> Her hair looks really good in this one.
00:04:10
It's a wig. >> Yeah, it looks great. But it's a good wig. Great wig. Like this one's real
00:04:14
good. >> Um, and Rosalie is not in it a lot in this one, but when she's in it, she
00:04:21
makes a [ __ ] impact. Her statement at the end, I was like, "Ooh, yeah." >> And we'll talk about it, don't worry.
00:04:26
Um, Jasper's hair looks absolutely [ __ ] insane. Jasper is absolutely [ __ ] insane.
00:04:33
>> The Confederate soldier's hair looks just outrageous. >> Yeah, it has also grown somehow. I don't
00:04:40
know. >> No, no, I didn't. >> I'm not really sure. >> Couldn't >> Couldn't Couldn't have done it.
00:04:44
>> Couldn't have done it. >> Won't uh he looks like a wild animal. >> Yeah, >> very much so.
00:04:49
>> Um and and he becomes one and he does shortly, which makes absolutely no sense, but we'll talk about that when we
00:04:55
get there. >> We're going to talk about that as well. Um I'm just trying to think of anybody
00:04:58
else. Charlie looks Charlie looks like a [ __ ] certified snack. >> Charlie somehow looks even better. He
00:05:05
does. >> Like I'm like, "Wow." >> Agreed. Uh yeah, when he first walks in, like we'll get to it with the birthday
00:05:11
presents. I was like, "Hi, Charlie. >> Hey, >> hi dad." [laughter] >> Like, what's going on?
00:05:16
>> Hi, Zatty. >> So, everybody looks great. We don't have to really deal with Bella's mom, which
00:05:20
is great cuz we hate Rene. >> Can't stand Renee. >> Rene is the worst. >> Cannot stand her.
00:05:24
>> Of course. Of course, Bella's having a [ __ ] meltdown crisis. >> I think at one point in the book, it
00:05:31
it's described as a walking coma. >> Yeah. She's suffering and Rene's nowhere to be found.
00:05:36
>> Nowhere. Yeah. >> Yeah. It's It's fine. She's got her, you know, she's got her minor league
00:05:40
baseball player boyfriend. Yeah. >> So, it's pretty serious. Phil. >> Yeah. There you go, Phil. Uh, we do meet
00:05:47
some new >> folks in this one, which maybe we're going to we're going to meet the Vuri.
00:05:53
>> I love the Vuri. >> I too very much love the Vuri. >> I love one person in particular and you
00:06:00
love one person in particular and they're a different person. And I absolutely know that everyone knows that
00:06:06
I love Arrow so much. >> Yeah. >> His insane laugh. >> Is that in this movie or is that in a
00:06:12
later one? >> He does one in this. He's He's known to do many. >> But there's one
00:06:16
>> there's one in a later >> I think it's Breaking Dawn. >> It is Breaking Dawn. I think
00:06:22
>> I can't When we get there does a [ __ ] sick impression of it. [laughter] >> It's true.
00:06:27
>> Sick in every sense of the word. >> Yeah. He's played by Michael Sheen and I think he just eats that role up. He was
00:06:36
made for that. >> He really was. >> Marcus Marcus, >> tortured Marcus who looks like he's
00:06:42
literally [ __ ] himself and is like [laughter] suffering the worst gastrointestinal pain of all time.
00:06:48
>> He's in such distress. In the movie, I was like, "What the [ __ ] is wrong with
00:06:52
that guy?" >> And here's the thing. When we get to it, I'll explain who all these people are.
00:06:56
I'll explain their backstories from the illustrated guide once again. So all these are directly from Stephanie
00:07:03
Meyers's own brainium. Um some of them even have conflicting information about themselves within the same paragraph. So
00:07:11
that's fun >> fun and new. Um and we'll get to like some of these little uh some of the
00:07:18
little things like you know >> we mention imprinting in this one. >> You're shuttered. Uh, we are going to
00:07:26
learn about finally the werewolves in this one. We we didn't really have it going on in Twilight. Um, we get to see
00:07:35
why the Quillute tribe, which is a real tribe. Yeah. >> Why they have mixed feelings about this
00:07:42
whole thing. >> Yeah. >> And by mixed feelings, we mean like aren't really happy about it.
00:07:45
>> Yeah. There's there one of the things is they didn't get compensated for the story essentially. I mean, they're a
00:07:54
massive their lore one isn't exactly this lore. It's it's been twisted a little bit.
00:08:02
>> Uh and so there's that which is not great. >> Yeah. >> And then also the lore is used for a
00:08:08
very large part of this story and they just kind of saw nothing except for people trapesing around trying to like
00:08:16
get a glimpse. >> Yeah. Like kind of becoming tourist attractions and that's >> that's so American.
00:08:21
>> Not great. Yeah. >> Um, not great at all. Uh, they did establish um PE people of the tribe establish the
00:08:29
Truth versus Twilight initiative >> and it's via the Burke Museum and apparently it's to like combat the the
00:08:37
uh false part of the narrative. >> That's so shitty that they kind of Yeah. Like they just wanted to they just
00:08:42
wanted to like counter what was right and truth and what was made up for Twilight, right? Um, so we'll get back
00:08:49
we'll get into that as well. But I the never being compensated thing I was like that's a bummer. That's really shitty
00:08:55
>> cuz I also just I'm like if you're going to make up like this story and this lore
00:09:00
and have it involve >> real people real like it's like why you should have just made up a whole if
00:09:07
completely fictionalize like meaning fictionalize >> who these people are >> if you're you know what I mean cuz it's
00:09:15
I feel like it's worse to take from real and use the real Quill tribe name >> and I mean I am not part of the quill
00:09:24
tribe obviously. So, I'm speaking from a totally outsider point of view, just what
00:09:28
>> it looks like to me. Um, but I don't know. I feel like I would be a little annoyed by that.
00:09:33
>> Yeah, probably. >> But you can only do what you can do. >> Yeah. >> And either way, the werewolf shape
00:09:40
shifter thing does become like a central part of this whole thing, which is what
00:09:44
we've been waiting for. We finally are going to get the true Bella, Jacob, and Edward triangle. It's the beginning
00:09:51
right here. This is where it begins. Especially the end of this movie like really heats it up for Eclipse and it's
00:09:58
just >> Yeah. wild. >> Cuz I feel like you couldn't come out of Twilight, the first movie or the first
00:10:04
book, and truly be like, "Are you team Jacob or are you team Edward?" Cuz there was no team like you were
00:10:09
>> Well, and you barely saw Jacob. Yeah. Like And >> and Jacob kind of felt like this like
00:10:14
younger brotheresque thing almost like you know like you he wasn't even on your radar. And then even in even in New
00:10:21
Moon, it's hard to choose because Edward has just basically been >> dominated the whole thing.
00:10:26
>> Not only dominated the whole thing, but is an [ __ ] in in New Moon. >> Yeah. Like true.
00:10:31
>> It's hard to be team Edward in New Moon. >> Yeah. And you you do feel like I felt so
00:10:37
bad for Jacob at times in this one. >> Mhm. >> Because I felt like, damn, he just got
00:10:44
like full-blown used. [laughter] >> No, he really did. And she basically says as much at one point.
00:10:51
>> Yeah. >> Like she's pretty [laughter] pretty. >> She's like, "Yeah, I'm just going to
00:10:54
hang out with you because like I don't really want to >> because I'm kind of losing my mind
00:10:57
without, oh, you want you want to vroom vroom on these bikes, Jacob? [laughter] >> You want to you want to go for a ride?"
00:11:03
>> But then when he and we'll get to it obviously, but then when he's basically like, I'm not going to give up. And I
00:11:07
was like, you do have to at some point though when somebody has told you they're not interested.
00:11:13
>> Yeah. >> You can't just keep going. Well, is it like a weird thing because he like with the imprinting stuff like
00:11:22
obviously later and we'll get into that like when the time comes, but he imprints on Reneesme who's like uh
00:11:28
Edward and Bella's baby, >> an infant. >> An infant. [laughter] Like I said, we'll
00:11:32
get there. But it's like did something like in him inherently know that that was going to like not like consciously,
00:11:40
but that's why he couldn't be rid of Bella or is he just [ __ ] obsessed with it? No, I think he's just obsessed
00:11:46
with I think he's honestly I think he's like in love with her. He's like very or
00:11:50
like whatever it is infatuated. >> Infatuated and and the problem is like I said before like when someone says
00:11:56
they're not interested. You got to move on. She doesn't >> really say it. >> She kind of like is like she doesn't say
00:12:04
it till the end. Yeah. You know, like the end she makes it it's always going to be him. I'm going to pick him every
00:12:08
time. That's clear as day. So that's when it's like, but before that, you're like, you need to be a little clearer to
00:12:15
him. >> Well, that's the thing. You're like nuzzling up on him. You're like almost
00:12:19
kissing him a lot. You're telling him these beautiful days together >> and then you're just kind of being like,
00:12:26
and it's like just be a little more upfront. Like just say no, it's okay. Just say like not interested, not going
00:12:31
to be interested. >> From what I remember of the third one, like I feel really bad for Jacob in this
00:12:36
one because of all that. But then in the third one you're like, "Okay, Jacob, [ __ ] you."
00:12:40
>> Well, that's exactly because it's like in this one they really set you up to be
00:12:44
like, >> "Oh, that poor kid. That poor kid." Until it gets to the end and then you're
00:12:48
kind of like, >> "All right, >> [ __ ] going on here." And then in the third in Eclipse, you're like,
00:12:53
>> "Okay." Like it's like >> I'm getting a restraining order. >> Yeah. And then there's also like Edward
00:12:58
can be a dick. It's like this is just toxic [ __ ] Edward Bella's relationship is the most literally this is from
00:13:06
>> this is from the website in the description of New Moon Stephanie wrote for Bella Swan there is one thing more
00:13:14
important than life itself Edward Cullen >> I would like to go on record that like
00:13:20
when I'm a mother if any [ __ ] lore like this ever emerges in my household [laughter]
00:13:25
like if if I ever find a book that says this [ __ ] on the back of anything if [laughter] anything like near it. I'll
00:13:32
sit my girlies down and be like, "Girls or or boys or whoever, what the [ __ ] is
00:13:38
this? This is so not okay." >> Yeah. >> Like I think about my mom letting me watch this. I'm like, "Did you read
00:13:45
this?" That's the thing. Like >> this is so toxic. I feel like this is like, you know what it is? It's like this is
00:13:53
like when you read these things as an adult like these dark romances where like it's a morally gray love interest
00:14:02
and all that that becomes like >> appropriate in a way that you can distinguish that from
00:14:09
>> Yes. >> your real life. You know what I mean? Cuz like >> cuz like right now like I'm read by the
00:14:14
way I'm reading Fantasma >> um by Kaylee Smith. I really hope I got I think you're right. Let me just make
00:14:21
sure I get on your counter, but I don't know. >> Is it right next to me? >> Oh, yeah. [laughter]
00:14:26
>> I was like, wait, I I keep bringing it around with me. I wanted to make sure I
00:14:30
got her name right. It's Fantasma by Kaylee Smith. Such a good book. It's like a horroresque
00:14:36
dark romance. >> Really good. And also like fantasy in there cuz it's like >> so like dark romanty.
00:14:41
>> Yeah. And like the the love interest is this like phantom obsessed >> named Blackwell who's like very morally
00:14:48
gray. And I'm but I'm literally like spend the rest of your days with him. Like I'm like that's
00:14:53
>> but in real life John is very much not Blackwell the Phantom who's morally gray.
00:14:58
>> I I can >> you know like he's a good guy. Like it's like when you're an adult you can sit
00:15:02
there and be like oh get it girl and then like you can be like but I love this man who's a good man.
00:15:08
>> But I feel like what you were saying like there was such young girls reading this. I thought this was top tier
00:15:14
romance. >> And this is for this to be where you get your like, oh, this is love. This is
00:15:21
pure. >> This man leaving you in the woods in a coma is real love. >> Coming from like now an adult point of
00:15:28
view and a parent point of view. I'm like, [ __ ] Like, [laughter] >> abandon me in the woods and run away
00:15:33
from me with your whole family. So, I know it's real. >> So, I [laughter] know >> like what?
00:15:39
How does he get the whole family involved? >> Everybody has to leave. >> The last family like Qua and where does
00:15:48
everybody? So unclear where everybody goes. >> Very unclear. >> Where does everybody go?
00:15:54
>> I also here's the thing and again we're going to get to it. But >> ob during this whole thing, Edward
00:16:02
appears to Bella in a vision, right? whenever she's doing some reckless [ __ ] >> Mhm.
00:16:08
>> And it like so when I f I don't remember reading this like I I remember that I
00:16:13
read this book. I didn't remember like all the details >> and then I remember seeing the movie.
00:16:19
Not once did I ever know until about 20 minutes ago when Ash informed me that she was not actually seeing. And I
00:16:28
thought he was somehow projecting himself cuz in the books she only hears him. Yeah,
00:16:34
>> she doesn't see him. And in the movie, obviously, they wanted that visual element, so they have him appear. I
00:16:40
thought he was really projecting himself. And I thought that's why he said, "Don't be reckless." Cuz he was
00:16:45
like, "I don't want to have to project myself." >> No, she just knows that he would say
00:16:48
that. >> But that's why I'm like, >> but I get what you're saying cuz it's not super obvious.
00:16:52
>> Cuz I'm like, you set this up so to not be clear. >> Yeah. Well, in her mind, it is very
00:16:58
clear. >> It's not. So, this is this is from uh Stephanie Meyer's like actual website,
00:17:04
like the archives. Um, this is frequently asked questions from New Moon. Was Edward somehow physically
00:17:09
connected to Bella with the whole hearing voices thing? Or if you're watching the movie, like the seeing him.
00:17:13
>> Yeah. She says, "No." So powerfully was Bella's subconscious knowledge trying to
00:17:17
break through her weheaded notions that it produced some very convincing delusions. I'm not surprised that people
00:17:23
thought in the beginning that Edward was somehow there. Wishful thinking on all of our parts. However, I am surprised
00:17:28
that people continued to think this after a certain event that made it impossible to believe that Edward was
00:17:34
aware of Bella's circumstances. Can you guess what it was? Laurent in the meadow. If Edward had any inkling of the
00:17:40
fact that Victoria had returned for Bella, no matter how far away on the planet he was, he would have been back
00:17:45
to Forks within 24 hours. [snorts] Here's the thing, that's not that clear. >> She was in imminent danger a couple of
00:17:56
times. She got on the back of that motorcycle. He go he's watching her go like do these stupid things,
00:18:02
>> you know, or like in if you think that he is watching. Yeah. You know what I mean? And that this is him projecting.
00:18:09
If that's what you thought, which is what I thought, >> then it would be like but no, I've seen
00:18:13
if I think he's really appearing, then I've seen him let her do this stupid [ __ ] over and over again,
00:18:19
>> right? >> And it's like who's to say that Lorent isn't bullshitting, >> you know? Like to me that didn't seem
00:18:27
very serious when he said it. I thought he was bullshitting at first. >> What? >> Like like if I would like Laurent like I
00:18:32
could Victoria was back. >> Yeah. Like I could see cuz he does do kind of like a flipperoo where like in
00:18:38
the first movie in the first book he like he kind of works with the Cullens and like helps warn them and then he
00:18:45
does this like flipperoo where he's just like I don't know. I guess I'll just eat
00:18:48
you now. And it's like what the [ __ ] like it does seem a little like you know >> like what's going on here which like I
00:18:54
guess he's hungry vampire clearly and his eyes are like bright red so he's clearly hungry like or has you know he's
00:19:00
going >> he just doesn't give a [ __ ] he's wild now you know but [snorts] >> I don't know I just that would that
00:19:05
didn't I think it didn't hit hard enough for me >> well I mean obviously it didn't hit hard
00:19:10
enough for a lot of people because it's a frequently asked question >> yeah like you you wonder I'm like yeah
00:19:16
to me it just felt like it made more sense to me that there was some kind of like telepathic connection between them
00:19:24
where he could project himself into her thoughts or into her space there, especially when it was just a voice.
00:19:31
>> Yeah, >> that made more sense to me. Thinking now that like she was just literally losing
00:19:36
it, >> like literally having delusions >> auditorially and visually hallucinating
00:19:41
him is so much more upsetting. >> Well, she is like >> like that's really >> This is sick.
00:19:48
>> Yeah. When now that I know that I'm like this is even worse than I thought. >> But I mean she tells us on the back of
00:19:54
the book there is one thing more important than life itself. >> Edward Cullen. Like that is fizzy fizzy
00:20:02
[ __ ] >> Yeah. >> Like obviously like people like like you love your children more than life itself
00:20:07
or you love like >> that's really the only thing I can think of is that like you love your children
00:20:11
more than life itself. >> They've been together at this point for months. They're teenage. Well, she's a
00:20:16
teenager. >> They're teenage. And I'm also like you've presumably never loved a boy
00:20:21
before. Like which of course >> when you love someone for the first time? >> It's so
00:20:27
>> it is all consumed. And it's not to say that like I'm not sitting here being like what the [ __ ] Get over it. Like I
00:20:33
was a [ __ ] wreck over >> much bigger losers than Edward Cullen. >> Let me tell you.
00:20:39
>> Let's be real. >> Distraught. >> Yeah. >> Not this distraught. Oh my god. >> Not not walking coma distraught and like
00:20:48
sitting alone at a lunch table >> getting on the back of losers motorcycles >> jumping off a cliff.
00:20:55
>> Jumping off a like this is I'm sorry. >> Screaming in the middle of the night.
00:20:59
That's exactly [laughter] >> that. >> I would call the doctor. >> I'd call someone.
00:21:07
>> I would absolutely on the be on the phone with the doctor. >> Mom, pick me up. I'm scared. Doctor,
00:21:13
call in something because this is >> we got to do something about this. >> I mean, poor Charlie.
00:21:19
>> Poor Charlie. But also, I'm like, Charlie, call someone. Like, who does he call
00:21:24
>> a professional? >> I don't Who's the professional? >> Psychologist, a psychiatrist. Bring her
00:21:28
to the fact that nobody brings her to the hospital >> is cuckoo nuts. >> It is cuckoo nuts. like this is
00:21:36
obviously this is fiction but if this was really happening you would be like we have to get you evaluated
00:21:43
change here >> and in instead Charlie's like I'm going to send you back to Arizona because this
00:21:47
is not okay and I'm like I don't think uprooting her and sending her to live to Arizona he does say that the mom is also
00:21:54
in on that which makes most sense >> that actually makes sense come on back >> yeah I'm like you don't even have a
00:22:00
permanent address Renee >> I know cuz they're in like Jacksonville I think at that point Yeah.
00:22:04
>> Um >> or they were >> who knows? But >> when we start this whole thing too, this
00:22:10
whole thing really relies on age. >> Yes. I mean, it starts off. >> She harps and harps. This is an
00:22:18
18-year-old girl. Let me tell you, from from my aged position over here, >> Yeah.
00:22:26
>> pissing me off listening to her complain. When she gets up and is like, "Do I have a gray hair?" I'm like, "Go
00:22:31
[ __ ] yourself. Unless you ring me on the horn when you have to buy a box of dye every couple weeks just to
00:22:40
make sure you don't look like, you know, mother time over here. >> Can I tell you something? Drew didn't
00:22:45
know that you dyed your hair. >> That is the greatest compliment I've ever heard in my life.
00:22:49
>> Drew did not know >> that just that you dyed your hair. >> That just And then here I'm outing him
00:22:54
fully. He's going to be so >> I go, she gets gray sometimes. Like, have you not seen that? And he goes, "I
00:23:01
just thought that was like her roots." And [laughter] and I said, "Well, yeah, >> that are gray
00:23:07
>> that like if that kept growing, her hair would be gray. [laughter] >> So when it goes away, it's cuz she dyes
00:23:14
it." And he was like, >> "Oh, [laughter] okay." >> We had like an hourong conversation
00:23:21
about it. And then I was like, >> like we we talked about family hair. I was like, "Are you all right?"
00:23:26
>> [laughter] >> Oh, are you And then we talked about like how red heads occur in families. It
00:23:31
was crazy. >> I'm obsessed with that. >> Yeah. I had to I had to bring back the the lore of Punet squares.
00:23:36
>> He the >> No, I literally was like, "Do you remember punit squares and like recessive traits?" And he was like kind
00:23:42
of No, actually I That's probably his exact reaction. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah.
00:23:46
>> I love that he didn't know. That honestly just made me feel so good cuz I'm like, "Well, damn."
00:23:50
>> He had no idea. >> We're keeping it looking real here, so that's good. >> Later in the argument, he was like,
00:23:54
"Well, no." Like I knew she dyed her hair and I was like, "No, when this started you had no idea." I said, "No."
00:24:00
>> I love that a lot. >> Yeah, it was wild. >> I love it. Um, so that's amazing. But
00:24:05
yeah, the that the whole age thing is is a real thing. >> They come after 40year-olds in
00:24:11
particular later. >> They sure do. >> I thought was going to eat her computer across
00:24:15
>> a [ __ ] across the room. >> Uh, but it begins with Bella being like an elder.
00:24:23
>> Yes. And it's like her and she's having a dream about her and Edward and she's
00:24:28
an older woman. She's an elder and they're in the meadow and he says, "Happy birthday, Bella."
00:24:33
>> Um, she's beautiful. >> She's a beautiful woman. Debbie thought she was Jane Goodall.
00:24:38
>> Yeah. I was like, damn. RIP. >> RIP. Um, but I understand her pissiness here cuz like if my boyfriend is hot and
00:24:50
immortal and is never going to age and outright refuses to allow me the experience of staying
00:24:58
hot and never aging. >> Mhm. >> I'd break up with him. >> Yeah. You're not going to make me age.
00:25:06
Like that's not something that's [laughter] going to happen. >> You won't do it. as somebody who has a
00:25:09
whole [ __ ] arsenal of skin care right now trying to make it so that I don't look like a prune in the next few years.
00:25:18
>> If my boyfriend had if John had venom in his veins that he could just give to me
00:25:25
to make it so I stop this and I never have to put like I love Metacube but I would never have to do my full metacube
00:25:34
process ever again. Yeah. >> And he was like, "No, I won't do that for you. >> Leave.
00:25:40
>> Deal breaker. >> Find you. There's obviously more vampires out there. >> Yeah. What the [ __ ]
00:25:45
>> Find somebody who will." >> I I asked him recently. I was like, "Would you?" Cuz I was I was like going
00:25:51
through this and thinking about it. I was like, "Would you do that for me?" >> He was like, "Of course I would. Why
00:25:56
not?" >> I don't That's the That's the big like plot hole here is like, "Why not?"
00:26:01
>> And I think it's And it's the whole soul. [ __ ] that. Yeah. [ __ ] that. when
00:26:05
like eventually well and then by the end of this like spoiler alert he's gonna have to because now the [ __ ] now he
00:26:11
has to but he's even trying to get out of it then I know >> that [ __ ] I'm like godamn I
00:26:16
would I'd start I'd be sus I'd be like who is it that you have that would be my crazy thought process especially at 18
00:26:24
years old >> he's not he's not changing me into a mortal baddy >> who is your immortal baddy that you will
00:26:32
not you're just waiting for me to age You got a side piece. What the [ __ ] is going on?
00:26:37
>> I'd be pissed. I didn't like it. Uh, this is It's her birthday. She's turning
00:26:41
18. >> Yeah. >> We see Charlie. He brings in adorable little And she she loves purple and he
00:26:46
wrapped them in purple. A >> It was very sweet. And he looks so good. He does. The first shot of Charlie, I
00:26:52
was like setting us off, right? >> Yeah. >> Um, she get she gets a digital camera
00:26:57
and it's like a pink digital camera and it brought me back. >> Oh, yeah. I had a blue one. Oh, I loved
00:27:03
it. I remember one, I think. But >> remember taking mirror pics with your camera.
00:27:07
>> Yeah, they had to be in the picture. >> Yep. >> And there's another part when she goes
00:27:12
to school and she sees everybody and she goes to take a picture of all of them and she You used like two hands to take
00:27:19
a photo. >> Yeah, cuz nobody steady. >> Yeah. She does that like mouth thing where she goes
00:27:28
>> her bottom lip in >> and she like blinks a lot and holds it up with one hand and just is like
00:27:35
>> and when she does it she makes this face like oh this is really hard >> and she snaps that photo with one finger
00:27:41
and I said that's blurry. >> Yeah, >> that's blurry. Nobody can tell me that's not blurry.
00:27:45
>> She also when they're like oh like Bella it's the big day like yay like I'm excited to see you. She takes that
00:27:51
camera and is like, "My mom wants me to like make a scrapbook of memories, so I guess I'll take a couple of pictures of
00:27:57
you [ __ ] idiots that I hang out with from time to time. [laughter] I don't even [ __ ] like you."
00:28:02
>> No, she It's giving the energy of like, "You guys are [ __ ] scoundrels and I
00:28:05
hate you, but post this [ __ ] picture." >> Yeah. She's like, >> "I would never commit your images to
00:28:12
film." >> No, she wouldn't. >> But my mom said I had to. I was like, "Are you 18?"
00:28:16
>> Rene wants me to make a [ __ ] scrapbook smile. stay being friends with her. I think
00:28:23
it's one of those ride or dies right here. >> They are. In fact, I think it's one of
00:28:27
those things, especially for Mike, is like you want the girl that doesn't want you,
00:28:32
>> I guess, cuz she doesn't want anybody like she's >> and that's why everybody including
00:28:36
friends, she doesn't want any of that. >> Yeah, it's wild. >> Honestly, Jessica is the realest [ __ ]
00:28:41
in this entire thing. And we'll get to her. >> And I remember thinking when I was
00:28:45
younger that she was such a [ __ ] >> They set her up to be. They set her up to be like they like the the they know
00:28:53
who they're playing to. >> Yeah. >> And because you watch it as a younger person, you're like, "Oh my god,
00:28:57
Jessica, like why don't you understand what Bella's going through?" You watch as an adult, you're like, "Oh my god,
00:29:02
Bella, you're the worst [ __ ] friend ever, and can you just listen to her problems, too?"
00:29:06
>> No, of course you won't. No, >> of course you won't. And behind her, Edward pulls into the parking lot and
00:29:11
takes up three spaces. >> Thank you. >> I parks at least three spaces. Let me tell you because I have personal
00:29:18
experience with this horizontally. >> I went on a date with a guy that did that and when he got out of the car and
00:29:23
I sat in the car, he had to like run in and do something. I said, "This will be our first and last date. I will never go
00:29:29
out with this man again." >> Are you you out there? >> If you're listening right now, do you or
00:29:37
someone you love do that? Do you park across three [ __ ] spaces horizontally like a [ __ ]
00:29:46
>> snicker doodle [ __ ] I had never >> What is that? >> Like a snicker doodle? [laughter]
00:29:52
>> I don't know. >> It's the closest thing. I don't know. >> Do you do that? Like a snicker
00:29:57
[laughter] doodle [ __ ] You said that with such gusto. I said, "Is that a thing?" [laughter]
00:30:02
>> It's a thing that snicker doodle. >> I made it up. >> I don't know. >> I don't know. [laughter] I just needed I
00:30:08
needed something. if it hits for me. Okay. I thought you were going to say like like a [ __ ] No, like a
00:30:14
snicker doodle [ __ ] No, I just remember like having that experience and being like
00:30:20
>> Yeah, that's looking at it on film. I don't know how I didn't notice it before
00:30:26
because now I just noticed it too >> and I was like like immediately was like oh god I'd be like get the [ __ ] back in
00:30:33
that car and you park like you want to pretend you're a human. Get back in the car and park like a [ __ ] human.
00:30:38
Gibb's like, "I'm more important than these two other people." >> What the? I'm like, "Fuck you."
00:30:43
>> In your Volvo. Like at my school, they would tow you. >> Yeah. They'd [ __ ] take your car away
00:30:49
forever. >> In my school, they just throw a bunch of baloney on your car. Go ahead. At the
00:30:53
end of the day, take that off. Takes the paint right off. >> First, she hits us with snicker doodle
00:30:58
[ __ ] And then she tells us that at her school, which I went to, by the way, that they [laughter] would throw baloney
00:31:05
at your car. What is the dark lore there? [laughter] What did somebody who hurt you?
00:31:13
>> Nobody did. What? I've I've I've heard about it. Okay. >> What? It's happened. It's happened.
00:31:22
Baloney will take the paint right off [laughter] their baked school officials do that.
00:31:29
>> The principal out here like, "Make it a great [laughter] day or not, I'm going
00:31:32
to throw baloney at your car." I'm just saying. I would throw bologoney at his [laughter] car. That's crazy. Also, the
00:31:40
fact that baloney takes the paint off of car and and cars and people still eat it
00:31:44
is that should tell you something. >> It is [laughter] rauny. >> Also, they kiss in this um scene and
00:31:52
it's porn. [laughter] >> Cuz Bell is like like they barely keep it together. like they are
00:32:02
so glad for them [laughter] that they're having that experience every single time
00:32:06
they kiss. Maybe have it at at home. >> That those are private moments like [laughter] not in the middle of the
00:32:12
school parking lot cuz both of them look like I was like >> do you need a minute? Like what?
00:32:18
>> Those are the noises [laughter] that they literally nuts. >> It's frightening.
00:32:22
>> It is. And then so they have their porn kiss and then Jacob shows up and is like
00:32:29
Bella. And he's like, "I got a birthday present for you." She looks over and says, "Jacob." And then she does this
00:32:35
hair tuck thing where she's like [laughter] >> like this very like like giddy like
00:32:40
coetish like and she literally >> goes to tuck her hair behind her ear in that like way.
00:32:47
>> Yeah. >> And then she's like, "Hello biceps. Your tongue was just in your boyfriend's
00:32:54
throat. >> Actually, it wasn't because she would have passed out had that been the case.
00:32:58
>> That's very true. But >> basically, >> the the idea was there. >> It was implied.
00:33:04
>> And then you turn around, get super giddy about this. >> Got to fix your hair immediately
00:33:10
>> and then say, "Hello, biceps." >> I can tell you right now, I don't know that John would be super
00:33:18
understanding of this. No, Drew definitely. >> Here's the thing. I do know that John
00:33:22
would not be super understanding about that's just I'm like I know that I wouldn't be super understanding about
00:33:28
this. >> No. >> Had this been flipped around. >> I'm barely understandable about like
00:33:32
celebrities that this would not go over well. Also, Bella, today's your 18th birthday.
00:33:40
Jacob's 16. Yeah. Leave his biceps alone. >> Leave his biceps. Those baby biceps.
00:33:45
>> It is. Now they run into Alice and Alice is wearing like a paint smok. >> Yeah.
00:33:51
>> As an outfit. Yeah. >> Um she looks adorable though. >> Yeah. She's cute >> even in the paint smok. Her hair did
00:33:56
grow. >> It did. >> The whole time they're talking because Alice wants to plan a party for Bella's
00:34:01
birthday. >> You know, she just wants to have the Cullins. It's very strange. >> Yeah. Weird.
00:34:05
>> Uh Jasper, our Confederate soldier guy back there, he is just like losing his
00:34:12
He's He's like in the back. He's losing his religion. like he's [laughter] just he can't he can bar he can barely hold
00:34:20
it together and no one is bleeding right now. >> Here's the other thing like accidents
00:34:24
happen a lot at school. Like people get paper cuts pretty frequently. Kids get into fights sometimes and blood is drawn
00:34:30
like >> bloody noses. >> Bloody noses. >> Periods. >> Periods are happening. >> Period.
00:34:36
>> Period. >> Yeah. >> How does he keep it together? >> It's a it's a great question. And also
00:34:43
he does this like mind thing on Bella or like the body calming effect cuz she says like no fair Jasper
00:34:49
>> that's not it doesn't hold up later. >> He can control like the temperature of
00:34:54
everybody's mood >> but she's supposed to be like a >> have like a force field around her
00:34:59
basically. >> Yeah. >> Remember cuz later on >> she's got like some kind of block when
00:35:04
Jane tries to do the thing to her later. It just doesn't work >> and it doesn't work when Arrow does.
00:35:08
>> So wide as Jasper. The white is Jasper. >> Unless >> And why can Alice see her choices and
00:35:16
visions? >> Yeah, >> it's all a little muddy. >> Yeah, there is a little muddiness.
00:35:21
>> There is a little bit. Little bit. >> A little bit. Uh in in class they're watching Romeo and Juliet cuz that's a
00:35:26
heavy theme in this whole thing as well. >> Um clearly >> isn't the is the prologue Romeo and
00:35:32
Juliet? >> Is it? I have to me everybody. I think it was supposed to be and if it's not I
00:35:40
think it got >> Oh, there's like a the first page is these violent delights have violent ends
00:35:45
and in their triumph die like fire and powder which as they kiss consume. Gorgeous.
00:35:52
Um >> when Edward recites Romeo and Juliet, I get it. I understand. >> Here's the thing.
00:36:00
>> Does nothing for you. I didn't really I don't really I think it's be I think it's the deadeyed way in which he does
00:36:07
it. [laughter] >> Well, he is dead like but here and and for that um usually I love [laughter]
00:36:13
somebody who looks like they've passed on but she's got that Nicole Richie type but [laughter]
00:36:20
usually I'm for that. >> If you've seen that Tik Tok, you know >> it's when you're reciting
00:36:26
um Shakespeare. >> Yeah. >> Give me a little something. Did you give me a little something behind that when
00:36:32
you're deadeyed staring and just like mono salobically saying it? Not doing it. [ __ ] five point.
00:36:39
>> Not doing it for me. >> I think that I was conditioned to love Edward Cullen and I don't want to be
00:36:44
unconditioned. >> Just know like I recognize that it's toxic but I'm here for it.
00:36:48
>> I also love Edward Cullen. I mean I love I love and I know everybody knows this
00:36:54
if you watched the rewatcher with us and listened along. I love a morally gray to
00:36:59
just outright vile fictional dude. [laughter] So I'm I'm not here to tell anybody.
00:37:08
>> I'm not here to tell you that like you shouldn't like Edward Cullen cuz I love
00:37:11
Edward Cullen as a character. It's just that that read >> didn't do the different strokes for
00:37:19
different folks. >> Give me a little something. It's Shakespeare. Put a little Put a little
00:37:22
something into it. >> I felt I felt what he put in there. It it was that deadeyed stare I couldn't
00:37:27
get past. But while they're they're watching Romeo and Juliet in school in class before he recites it and he just
00:37:33
like casually tells Bell he's like, "You know that time when you got bit by James
00:37:37
and like almost died? Um I was just going to kill myself." And she was like, "Whoa." And he was like,
00:37:43
>> "I mean time to say it." >> Well, and he's literally like, "I planned it." And she's like, "You what?
00:37:48
Like excuse me." And she's and he's like, "Yeah, I know. It's like it's a little harder for me to do it." So, I
00:37:53
was going to go to Italy and I was going to, you know, I was going to like provoke the Vuri into killing me and
00:38:00
planned >> on their conversation. >> That's You're just sitting in the back of English class.
00:38:06
>> Yeah. And also like the Vuri is not supposed to be known to anybody. No. >> So, him even telling her that is no
00:38:11
bueno. >> Him saying that in English class is probably >> pretty wild. >> Probably an issue.
00:38:16
>> If Arrow heard that, he would laugh so hard and then and he would kill you. >> Really? He should have no problem. It's
00:38:22
like you're [ __ ] this up. >> Yeah. >> Well, no, he shouldn't. He doesn't know that because he has to touch the person
00:38:28
before he hears all their thoughts, >> but later he touches Edward. >> Yeah. But I'm sure that one didn't,
00:38:34
>> you know, permeate. >> There's millions of thoughts that he's reading to. I'm sure that one didn't
00:38:39
permeate. You would think hearing Voluri, >> you would think >> might ding. >> You know, speaking of the Vuri, he
00:38:45
explains the one law that the Vurter really enforces is that they have to keep the existence of vampires a secret.
00:38:53
Um, and with that, I want to just quickly tell you about the Vuri. >> Let's [ __ ] go mentioning them.
00:39:00
Illustrated guide. >> Illustrated guide alert. So, according to the illustrated guide,
00:39:10
>> they're basically royalty to vampires, which Edward says as much. Um, there's
00:39:14
five core members. Um, at this moment, it's Arrow, Kais, Marcus, SPIA, which is Arrow's wife. Oh, yeah. Does she ever
00:39:23
come back around? >> I don't know. And then there's Athena, which is Kais's wife.
00:39:30
>> Um, cool of her to not make the lives important. Yeah. Cool. I don't know if she come they come later or what. I
00:39:34
don't remember ever seeing their wives. >> I don't remember Arrow ever having a wife.
00:39:39
>> No, I don't either. Yeah, >> maybe. I haven't seen I haven't watched. >> I can't remember.
00:39:44
>> One I haven't read like the >> I haven't seen I haven't watched I haven't >> I haven't been there.
00:39:48
>> I haven't I haven'tumed at all. >> It's been a while. >> Yeah, we'll get there cuz we are going
00:39:52
to do all of them. We promise you this. >> I watched Eclipse recently but I stopped
00:39:56
before Breaking Down. >> I haven't watched Eclipse in forever. When I went like back in October, I did
00:40:01
Bing Bang Ward and then I fell right off. See, I only hit one and I started >> New Moon.
00:40:08
>> I can never just watch one. >> You can't just watch one. >> Um, but they have their own city in
00:40:13
Italy called Belterra. >> That's pretty hot. >> Uh, and they've secretly controlled it
00:40:17
for 3,000 years. So, that's pretty sweet. They pulled a fast one over on the Romanians at some point, the
00:40:23
Romanian coven. Um because they were super powerful vampires at the time and they tried to get them like they were
00:40:29
just beefing for territory >> as people do, >> you know, we beef for territory. And
00:40:34
they tried to get them to conform to the Vuri law and of course the Romanians were like, "No, bitch." And so they used
00:40:41
that as a reason to kind of like beef harder with them and take over their territory, which they ended up doing. So
00:40:47
it's really topical. It is. Uh, Arrow also likes to create vampires very specifically. He likes to create them
00:40:55
when they have special abilities. He like an army of very specialized vampires, which
00:41:00
>> why? I think that's just smart. >> It's called curating. >> Yeah, it's up. Hey, have a Pinterest
00:41:06
board. >> Let's go. >> The world is Arrow's Pinterest board. Okay. [laughter] So, he's just looking around.
00:41:12
>> His pen is bite is Oh, [snorts] that's No, that's Rewatcher. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. I forgot. They don't they don't
00:41:18
snarf out their fangs cuz they don't have fangs. >> Oh [ __ ] I forgot that they don't have
00:41:22
>> which to be honest doesn't make sense. >> It's kind of [ __ ] >> They don't have bang fangs. They don't
00:41:27
have tattoos. They're only white. Boo. >> Yeah. Like true. And in this one when you see Laurent they cast like this
00:41:34
weird pale uh filter a little bit over him. I don't know if you noticed it too. >> Like they white
00:41:40
>> when they first show him he's like paler than he looks. And I was like don't do
00:41:45
that. His skin is gold. Yeah, >> cuz in the first um movie >> I mean there's no filter.
00:41:50
>> I mean in both movies I think Laurent is >> he's fine. >> Stunning. >> Yeah. >> And so but in the first movie I don't
00:41:57
know. It didn't look like it had that pale sheen filter over him. I'm not I'm not really sure if it was just like
00:42:02
lighting or whatever. >> But yeah, so they take over the Romanian territory and Arrow loves to create
00:42:07
special vampires. Uh he just wants to make sure the Vuri is like extra badass. So he's like I want all these
00:42:12
specialized things. Um, the biggest law is to keep vampires a secret. Of course,
00:42:17
don't want people knowing. They use humans as like servants essentially. And sometimes they'll turn them, sometimes
00:42:23
they'll eat them, as we hear at the end of the the movie when Jane, like one of them is like, "Oh, does she want to be
00:42:29
turned?" That's what Bella says. And she's like, "So she'll be turned." And then Jane says, "Or dessert." And I was
00:42:34
like, "That's awesome." >> I love Jane. >> Jane is scary. >> We get more of her, I think, in Eclipse
00:42:40
and Breaking Dawn. I love that. Fanning ate that [ __ ] up. >> She eats up every [ __ ] roll.
00:42:45
>> She really ate >> I love her. >> There's also there's another law that's like really important to the Vuri that
00:42:51
doesn't get touched upon here yet, but we'll get to it. Um is the making of immortal children.
00:42:57
>> Oh yeah, they don't want that. That's why Reneesme becomes such a problem. >> Big issue.
00:43:02
>> Yeah, which we'll get there. Um so the present day Volter um they have like nine permanent members of the guard
00:43:10
apparently. Like there's five of like the the big wigs and then there's nine members of the guard.
00:43:14
>> Okay. >> And then there's like a bunch of other members outside of that. >> Uh but there's Jane and Alex who or
00:43:20
Alec, excuse me. They're twins. Um where they were turned >> because they had special abilities as
00:43:28
humans. Okay. >> And Arrow heard about this. This is according to the illustrated gun.
00:43:37
Arrow heard about these special abilities when they were like toddlers, >> like when they were young.
00:43:43
>> So good. He didn't. >> So he started like following them around and he >> kind of just rolling through these
00:43:49
streets behind toddlers. >> Just like [laughter] waiting for them to to like something to happen.
00:43:54
>> Catch arrow at your local toys. >> He also he can't make an he can't make immortal children. That's part of the
00:43:59
law. So he couldn't turn them. He >> does. >> No. So this is interesting. And I don't
00:44:04
know if it gets touched upon in the movies. I can't remember. So Jane and Alec, they're twins. They're
00:44:10
I think they're like around 800 AD is when they existed. And when they were like tw as they grew up, they had these
00:44:18
abilities, psychic abilities. Jane has the ability to cause inflict insane mass destruction mind.
00:44:25
>> And Alec, his thing is he can cut off anyone's senses, hearing, seeing, smelling,
00:44:32
>> feeling, anything like that. He can cut them off like totally. I thought you could say he can cut anyone off and I
00:44:38
said that's also my special ability that's also become [laughter] mine. But yeah, he can do that. So their those
00:44:46
abilities were not like fully formed, but they were kind of and like a lot of people in their village thought they
00:44:50
were weird. They started freaking people out in their village. They're twins with
00:44:54
these weird darks and like they're both kind of like like Jane's super like monotone and like scary. Yeah.
00:45:00
>> Yeah. So like people in the village started thinking they were witches. >> Iconic. This is 800 AD. They burned them
00:45:06
at the stake when they were 12 or 13 years old. >> Oh, they literally burned them.
00:45:10
>> They got burned at the stake at 12 or 13 years old. Arrow found out about this
00:45:14
and as they were on the brink of death, he said, "Well, I can save them." >> All right.
00:45:19
>> So, he saved them, turned them into vampires. >> That's honorable. >> And now he gets to use their special
00:45:24
abilities. And those special abilities, everybody got amplified when they became
00:45:30
vampires vampire because Alec, while he was being burned, apparently was using his own powers on himself to not feel
00:45:38
being burned. >> Okay. >> And so now he uses those powers to like incapacitate people that they're in
00:45:45
battle with so that it's like an easier kill. >> Ah, >> and then Jane's just pissed. [laughter]
00:45:50
Good for her. She got pissed. So she's just like, I was burned at the steak. I'm going to [ __ ] people up.
00:45:54
>> Yeah, let's go. >> So, I thought that was pretty cool. >> That is pretty cool.
00:45:58
>> Uh, in the Vuri, cloaks determine rank. Like the >> the uh whatever your cloak color is.
00:46:04
>> It's like Slytherin, Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, >> but it's like a but it's like a rank.
00:46:08
So, like the darker cloaks are higher rank. >> Okay. >> And in the illustrated guide, there's a
00:46:14
quote from Stephanie Meyer that says, >> which I found like interesting. She said, "There aren't many bad guys in my
00:46:20
novels." Disagree. I hard disagree. Even the bad guys usually have a pretty good
00:46:26
reason for the way they are and some of them come around in the end. I don't see
00:46:30
the world as full of negatives. >> James question mark >> James question mark arrow question mark
00:46:36
[laughter] >> question mark which we'll get to. >> Jane question mark I mean yeah like
00:46:41
there's some bad guys I feel like. >> Yeah. Well, >> you know, >> well, >> like like what reason should we
00:46:48
prescribing as as valid >> for hunting someone, >> you know, to each their own. >> I guess like that's whatever you think
00:46:56
is a valid reason for doing >> morals. >> Yeah. >> Are different for everybody. >> We do watch at the end an entire tour
00:47:03
group of men, women, and very young children enter the Vuri lair and get slaughtered. Yeah.
00:47:10
>> Um, so I don't I don't know what reason we would prescribe that that would feel
00:47:16
right, but >> they were dumb. >> But again, [laughter] there are you know what they were too
00:47:21
inquisitive of history. That's >> too in search of knowledge. >> Yeah. Great. >> Um, so that was interesting to me. I
00:47:29
guess we can get Should we get to Arrow like talking about them now or should I wait until we meet them? Probably wait
00:47:34
until we meet them. >> No, why don't you get into it now cuz you're already in the volcan Yeah.
00:47:38
>> So let's talk about Arrow. Yeah, >> because we've already talked about him. >> Um, he's got black hair. He's got red
00:47:43
black eyes. >> His skin is described as like translucent like a lot of them are >> also described that way.
00:47:51
>> She lo she loves to describe the their skin as being like that of the skin of
00:47:56
an onion >> which gives me that >> the mostickic. >> Ew. So it's like filmy. >> That's the thing. It makes me think like
00:48:03
kind of slimy >> in a way and like membraney. That's a thing. Like it gives I was like, "Oh, a
00:48:10
lot of them are described like that." >> Also, like I love peeling onions. >> Yeah, that's what they're saying.
00:48:15
>> I'd want to It's like a sunburn. >> He's also described as 5 foot 10. >> Okay.
00:48:20
>> Which I was like, he has big dick. He has big guy energy. >> Yeah, he really does. He's pretty tall.
00:48:25
>> He has much taller energy. >> You're 5'1. So that's really tall to you. >> That's tall to me.
00:48:30
>> Yeah, it would be. I don't know if I'm 5'5 or 5'6. I've really never been able
00:48:33
to determine. Yeah, with brown eyes. >> Pretty tall. 5'5 with brown eyes. >> That's me. Um,
00:48:38
>> possibly. >> Yeah, he I he has the energy of somebody who's 6' three, I would say.
00:48:45
>> I would say. >> Yeah. At least at least a sixfooter. >> Definitely. >> Uh, but his special ability, because of
00:48:50
course he has one. >> He can touch somebody and he can, like we mentioned earlier, can hear every
00:48:55
thought they've ever thought in their entire life. >> So disturbing. Which feels like a wild
00:48:59
ability to >> I'm like I'm like even the intrusive ones. >> Yeah. Yeah, even when I've like wanted
00:49:04
like not wanted to but been like, "You're off the road right now." >> Oh, yeah. >> Cut your finger off.
00:49:09
>> All my question is how are they cataloged? Do they just come flying at him? >> Does he like have a tab in his head
00:49:15
where he can like click and expand? >> Like how does are they just coming at him or can he like flip through and be
00:49:21
like, I'd like to look at the ones when they were 18 >> in this like >> I'd like to look at the ones from this
00:49:27
afternoon. like how do you maybe they all just like they all flood through but they all hit.
00:49:32
>> It's pretty wild. He uses it later and he's pretty effective at it. But um the
00:49:37
illustrated guide says at one point that he was transformed when he was like 40.
00:49:43
>> Okay. And in the same paragraph it says that he was in his mid20s. >> Different. So
00:49:49
>> different. >> I guess split the difference and say he was 30 maybe. >> Okay. I suppose.
00:49:55
>> All right. Um, he was the last of his coven to form a romantic attra attachment, which I I'm like that makes
00:50:03
sense for Arrow, I feel. >> Yeah. Like took him a minute. >> Yeah. >> You know, he's not one to settle. I
00:50:10
mean, if you can hear everybody's ever every single thought they've ever had, it would take me a minute to settle down
00:50:15
as well. >> That's true. >> You know. >> Yeah, I get that. >> Yeah. >> He also uh he did kill his own sister.
00:50:23
>> Oh. Um. >> Oh yeah. >> Oh. [laughter] >> Oh. So I think one of the reasons So his
00:50:32
own sister I I don't know how to say her name. I'm probably spelled kind of wild.
00:50:38
It's d i d y. >> M e. >> Did uh diddy me. Uh because he killed her cuz uh >> uh he killed her. He turned her and then
00:50:54
she became mates with Marcus >> who looks like he has gastronomy. >> He's the one who looks like he's
00:50:59
constantly looking for a bathroom [laughter] always. He's looking for Emodium at all
00:51:04
times. >> Um and we know why now. We we'll get into it, but he's on the count like the
00:51:10
alter with him. Uh I think they planned to leave together and so he killed her. I think he also he didn't love she had a
00:51:19
special I don't think she had like crazy special abilities so he was like you're
00:51:22
just not really >> um I don't really need your [ __ ] you know >> and uh about him forming a romantic
00:51:28
attachment last the way that Stephanie Meyer said it was Arrow decided in advance that he would rather choose a
00:51:34
human and create a mate than look for his match in another vampire who might have ties to her own creator or other
00:51:41
relationships that would complicate his plans. >> I get that. And I said, "Honestly, same,
00:51:45
King. I'd be the same way." >> Yeah. >> Like, if I was a vampire for that many years,
00:51:50
>> Yeah. >> I'd be like, "Yeah, I think I'm just going to like choose my own adventure
00:51:54
>> 100%." >> Like, I'm not cuz that person might have ties to their creator and I don't want
00:51:58
to I don't want to deal with that. >> Yeah. Sirehood is big. >> Yeah. Yeah. Like, I'm for that. So, I
00:52:03
get it. And again, he's the one who discovered Jane and Alex, so he's the one who did that whole thing.
00:52:08
>> Okay. Okay. Now, speaking of Marcus, who is his Arrow's sister's mate? >> Yes,
00:52:15
>> Marcus has black hair. He has red and black eyes. He was the mate of Arrow's sister, Ditim, and he never got over her
00:52:24
death. >> Oh, >> but he also doesn't know who killed her. >> Oh, yeah. >> [ __ ]
00:52:30
>> He doesn't know that it's Arrow, >> that it's his literal like right-hand guy. and he's been going through like he
00:52:36
wants to discover who killed her >> and so he just a sad boy. >> That's that's why he feels looks that
00:52:45
way. >> He's very bummed. >> Of course he very bummed. So when he is sitting there and we'll talk about it at
00:52:51
the end when we see him and he just looks [ __ ] miserable. He is >> he is >> like he is.
00:52:57
>> Wait, so what's his special power? >> So his special power is he can see the relationships and connections that
00:53:02
people have with each other. which I said so can people with eyes. >> So uh >> okay special I I guess uh apparently in
00:53:15
like a big situation with like a big group of people he can pick out the leader or he can sense like a bond
00:53:20
between certain people. >> So he's just a people person. >> He can also see when bonds are weak and
00:53:25
that's just being around people. >> He's an empath. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> He's just like a uber empath.
00:53:30
>> He's got a good gut. So he's aside from the gas. >> Aside [laughter] from the the Emodium.
00:53:34
>> Yes. >> Uh so that's Marcus. So he's just really sad. >> See, I feel like Arrow probably would
00:53:40
have killed him, but Arrow probably finds like joy and knowing that he killed his sister who was Marcus's wife,
00:53:46
and now he can [clears throat] just watch and be miserable. >> Yeah. You know, my guy Arrow. That's
00:53:50
what he's all about. >> Otherwise, [laughter] that's not a super useful skill. >> No. [gasps]
00:53:54
But maybe it's kind of useful cuz it's like you can tell when things I think he can tell fast. So, I think he can look
00:54:00
over at somebody and be like, "Oh, that bond's not that strong." Or like if people are pretending to have a strong
00:54:06
bond, he could be like, "No, like that [ __ ] isn't real." >> Or like he can tell like fakery. Or he
00:54:11
can tell these two actually care about each other a lot. They're not saying it, but like you could exploit that.
00:54:17
>> All right. >> You know, so I guess that could be part of it. >> Uh Kais, who is played by Jamie Campbell
00:54:23
Bower, aka >> Vecna. Everybody, >> look at that. Uh he is one of these guys. He's he has white hair. He has the
00:54:32
red black eyes. >> He his special power is just being a hater. >> Love. [laughter]
00:54:40
Love. In fact, Arrow literally says that he was impressed by his quote passionate
00:54:47
capacity to hate. I get it. [laughter] >> That man's a Gemini. Yeah, he [ __ ] he's Beckna essentially. Like he is
00:54:58
Beckna. >> I don't know anything about Beckna, but he's so good at holding a grudge. Like
00:55:01
just professional professional. >> He owns a grudgery. >> He owns a grudgery. >> Um he hates werewolves.
00:55:09
>> Hates them. He wants them eradicated. >> Doesn't see a need for them at all. >> But the ones that he hunted were
00:55:16
different from the Quillute tribe. >> Okay. >> He hunted um werewolves that were
00:55:21
actually called the children of the moon. obsessed. >> And I guess they are real bonafide
00:55:27
werewolves where the Quillute tribe are shape shifters. >> Okay. >> And can choose when to transition into a
00:55:35
werewolf. But the children of the moon, >> full moon hits werewolf. Like they don't
00:55:40
get a choice. >> All right. >> Like they're the they're the werewolves that you think of
00:55:45
>> in you know what I mean? Like the classic werewolves that don't have a choice. Every full moon they're just
00:55:50
going to turn into a werewolf. Buffy. >> Yeah. Got it. So, he was hunting those ones. Let's I guess we'll stay tuned and
00:55:56
see how he feels about the quill you tribe. >> Yeah, probably not good. >> I'm going to say this guy holds a
00:56:00
grudge. I don't think he's going to like them. >> I'm obsessed with that special power.
00:56:03
>> Yeah. Um we already talked about Alec and Jane. Uh there is a point in the book where Jane walks in and Arrow's so
00:56:12
happy to see her and he walks up to her and it's like, "Oh my god, girl." And he
00:56:15
just kisses her right on the mouth. I want to be clear with you that Jane canonically is 12 and Arrow canonically
00:56:23
is either 40 or in mid20s. >> Either way, [laughter] not good. >> Shouldn't be kissing a 12-year-old on
00:56:30
the lips. >> No. No. >> Uh, and she says like she says like, "Hello, master when that happens." So,
00:56:36
there's a lot [laughter] there to to to unpack. >> There's a lot there to shove into a
00:56:42
corner. >> So much to shove into a corner. So, we're going to shove that into a corner
00:56:46
right now because we're not >> we're not quite there. So, that's the vuri of it all. That's we're going to
00:56:52
get to that. >> Um, that's a whole thing. And we'll get to the quillutes a little more when we
00:56:57
get to that part, I think. >> Okay. So, this whole plan where he was going to kill himself and he's just
00:57:02
casually dropping that in English 101. >> Yeah. And she's just like, "Whoa, that's
00:57:06
crazy. Don't do that." And he's like, "All right, I guess not." >> Cool. And they're just like obsessed
00:57:11
with each other and they can't live without each other. >> Obsessed with you. very very much like a
00:57:15
lot a lot of pressure on each other. >> Sort of like a trauma bomb. >> They both are putting a lot of pressure
00:57:20
on each other. >> Yeah. You guys have only been together for like a few months. >> So then we get to the Colin house. The
00:57:27
party is happening. At one point she goes down there. It's real pretty. They did a great job. Lots of flowers.
00:57:32
>> The cake is the ugliest thing I've ever seen in my [ __ ] life. >> Yeah. >> It's green and white and I hate it.
00:57:37
>> But I think Bella would love it. >> Yeah, cuz she has horrible face. >> I think they I think they nailed that
00:57:41
for her. Yeah. Well, Alice's style is also questionable. >> But Alice just gets Bella at the time.
00:57:47
She's like, "She will [snorts] love this. >> It's so gross." >> Um Alice also runs up to her when she
00:57:52
walks downstairs, takes a picture of her with a digital camera and says, "Um, I got this out of your bag. I hope you
00:57:58
don't mind." And I said, I would be like, >> I I so much do. >> I mind. >> Like I' I'd literally be like, we should
00:58:06
walk over here and talk about boundaries. >> Are you a club? Cuz none of you have
00:58:10
any. And that's weird. You can't just go in my bag and get my birthday present out and use it. Like that's just
00:58:16
>> you can't >> just ask me. You know I have a camera obviously. So it's like just say can I
00:58:21
use the camera real quick? >> She knew that she would say no. >> Bel doesn't like being in pictures.
00:58:26
>> Rosalie is the appropriate level of [ __ ] that I want from a hot vampire. >> Yes.
00:58:32
>> Like I was thinking that as this scene happened cuz she's like undoubtedly a wildly hot vampire.
00:58:40
And when you see her in this scene, you're like, "Oh, I would [ __ ] hate it if you were nice."
00:58:44
>> I would hate it if she was kind and welcoming. I'd be like, >> she is the appropriate level of [ __ ]
00:58:51
She's uninterested. She's annoyed that she has to be there. >> When she says she tells [laughter] her
00:58:56
what the birthday gift is. >> Oh my god. Alice just hands her a box and is like, "You first, Rosalie." And
00:59:00
Rosal's like, "It's a necklace. Alice picked it out. I didn't get this for you." I said, she said, "I didn't get
00:59:07
this for you, and I won't give you the joy of surprise. It's a necklace." >> No, don't even [ __ ] open it. Who
00:59:11
gives a [ __ ] >> Like, I just loved it. I said, "Oh, I love her." >> Um, then we have the whole Bella cuts
00:59:19
herself >> just loses it. Okay, I would like to come in here. >> Yeah, >> she gets a paper cut.
00:59:30
>> Mhm. Jasper was there in the first movie when we are to believe that Bella has
00:59:36
like opened up her femoral artery and it is leaking everywhere and like hemorrhaging all over the place.
00:59:42
>> Sure was. >> And Jasper's in the background helping them fight off James. >> Unbothered. How can he not handle a
00:59:49
paper cut when her femoral artery was hemorrhaging? >> Yeah. Hello. >> They mention at all like that like after
00:59:58
she passed out, Jasper had to be like taken out of the room. >> Yeah, I do think they say that. But like
01:00:06
>> but like you didn't but like he stays in the room. >> He was able to be distracted.
01:00:10
>> Yeah. With something. >> Yeah, that's the that's the main problem is like he was distracted with the the
01:00:16
James of it all. And I actually don't even know if they say it in the movie. I think you're right. I think they
01:00:20
mentioned it in the movie. >> Yeah, cuz I feel like I all of a sudden that just popped in my head.
01:00:23
making that up. >> They definitely mentioned it in the book almost positive. >> I think they do that
01:00:29
>> to explain it >> as the smallest way of explaining this cuz I think otherwise it doesn't make
01:00:33
sense. >> But even still, it really doesn't hold up. >> No, his reaction to that little of blood
01:00:39
>> and like the immediate reaction >> and that they can't stop him, >> right? Like he yeets everybody around
01:00:45
and Edward straight [snorts] up launches like like a like a t-shirt gun. [laughter] Launches
01:00:55
>> like >> not a t-shirt gun. >> Like launches >> Bella into a table into a glass table.
01:01:02
>> Yeah. >> Shatters the [ __ ] out of her arm. >> The paper cut was one thing, but then
01:01:06
she just opened up her arm, so she's bleeding everywhere. Now the whole place is just sitting there like snarling at
01:01:11
her. Also, is she taking like three baby aspirin a day? I hope so, cuz that [ __ ]
01:01:15
is bleeding. >> Bleeder. >> Yeah. >> But like whenever like that paper cut, it was like I was like, you're on a
01:01:21
blood thinner. >> Yeah. I was like, damn. >> Like what's going on, baby girl? >> Calm down.
01:01:25
>> Hello. >> Calm down, babe. >> But yeah, it's pretty crazy. Um, and after Jasper tries to kill her and you
01:01:32
know, like Carile fixes her up and everything and they have a discussion about Edward's soul, Edward is such a
01:01:39
dick and kind of just disappears after this. Like can't handle the fact that she's a human, that that's what could
01:01:45
have happened, blah blah blah. In the book, he comes over at one point to watch ESPN with Charlie
01:01:52
>> and have like bonding time with him. >> Okay. and like basically ignores Bella
01:01:57
the whole time and like isn't very like she's trying to like still ignore her. >> What?
01:02:03
>> It's very weird. >> I'd be like, "Why did you come to my house to ignore me, you douche?"
01:02:06
>> Yeah. And during this whole thing, she's doing her scrapbooking thing cuz remember my mom wants me to take
01:02:11
pictures and do a scrapbook. I don't care about any of you. And she has a picture from the birthday party of her
01:02:16
and Edward and she folds herself out of the picture and then tapes just him in there. And I was like, this is so
01:02:23
damaging to young girls to watch. >> You don't matter. You don't matter. >> You're disgusting. He's perfect. So,
01:02:31
just crop yourself out. >> You shouldn't actually even exist in physical photo form.
01:02:35
>> Like, what the [ __ ] >> Yeah. >> Bella should be seeing a psychiatrist. >> Yeah. Like and then when the Cullens
01:02:43
stop going to school because remember when Edward is is sad they all have to [laughter]
01:02:48
>> everyone shuts down their life >> and which honestly I'd be like yeah get sad all the time cuz why the [ __ ] am I
01:02:54
going to school 6,000 gajillion years old >> is that why am I going to high school
01:02:58
for the 85th time in a I think we have enough graduation caps as a joke. >> Even though that that art piece is
01:03:04
pretty rad, >> but they when they stop coming to school, like they show Bella just
01:03:08
sitting there like staring at their table at the lunch table >> and her friends around her are all like
01:03:14
goofing around making each other laugh, throwing [ __ ] at each other. >> You're just watching this and you're
01:03:18
like as a young girl watching this, >> it's you it's like this is what you should be doing. You should be goofing
01:03:26
around with your friends, having fun, talking about silly [ __ ] and you are so deeply entrenched
01:03:33
>> in this one person. It's like exactly what it's exactly what I don't want for
01:03:40
my daughters is somebody to be this for them to be this entrenched in a person this young
01:03:46
>> and miss out on everything they should be doing. >> We will show them the outtakes as a
01:03:50
cautionary tale. I will show them this as a caution and be like you can't be like this
01:03:55
>> like don't end it with the screams in the night. >> Yeah. >> Not the proposal.
01:04:00
>> That's how you will end. >> Yeah. >> Now this is when she goes home and Edward is
01:04:07
just creeping. First he steals the picture. He's in her room and he steals the picture.
01:04:11
>> So [ __ ] up. >> Yeah. And then he's just cre he doesn't even leave a picture of himself for
01:04:15
>> and then he's creeping in her [ __ ] driveway >> and he says >> you want to take a walk with me real
01:04:23
quick and the way he says it my true crime brain said nope >> no >> you're not going in the woods with that
01:04:29
man >> also >> the way he said you want to just take a quick walk with me for a minute in the
01:04:34
woods with how you've been acting and how you just said that no sir >> why does he take her into the woods to
01:04:40
do what he's allowed to still asking that question to this day. >> Take her to her house.
01:04:46
>> Make sure Charlie's home. >> Do it. >> Sit on the front steps and do it so she
01:04:51
can go inside. >> Why do you have to be in the woods? >> If you didn't want to be in the house
01:04:54
cuz you know you're going to be a [ __ ] and you won't sit on the front steps. >> Sit in her car.
01:04:59
>> Tell her. And then wait for her to go inside so you know she's got somebody >> like sit in the back of her truck.
01:05:04
>> This [ __ ] left her in the middle of Forks Washington Woods. The fact that he makes her do a hike before breaking
01:05:13
up with her. Volatile >> and the way he they hike far in vast wood. >> And the most cutting thing he says to
01:05:22
her is I'm just sorry I let this go for so long. >> Oh, >> for some reason that one just cuz he's
01:05:30
pretending that he doesn't give a [ __ ] that he doesn't actually like her. >> Yep. It's a little too easy for him to
01:05:35
pretend >> it is. He and it when he said I'm just sorry that I let this go on for so for
01:05:41
some reason that would have gutted me but you said it's worse in the book cuz it sounds that's makes you sound
01:05:47
pathetic like it's l like I'm sorry that I just like let you think I liked you for that long like it's like and then
01:05:52
she also in the movie she's like I'll go with you and he goes I don't want you >> I'm like damn
01:06:00
>> ouch it's so diabolical >> in the book it's even >> in the you read it to me earlier and I I
01:06:06
almost cried. >> It's a rough one. >> It hit me. So, in the book, he says, "Don't worry, you're human. Your memor
01:06:13
is no more than a civ. Time heals all wounds for your kind." And she says, "And your memories?" And he says, "Well,
01:06:20
I won't forget, but my kind were very easily distracted." And then he smiles. He says,
01:06:27
>> I said, "You, [ __ ] you. >> I'm I'm sorry. What? I'll think of you from time to time and then I'll distract
01:06:32
myself, >> but I'll just be distracted >> easily." >> Easily. like >> and and during all this in the book
01:06:40
because I noticed in the movie when he says like um promise me something she doesn't say like yes I will. She's just
01:06:47
like in shock >> in the book when he says promise me something she says anything.
01:06:52
>> Oh no. [gasps] >> So as a man anything in the woods >> well and when he's telling you I don't
01:06:57
give a [ __ ] about you like I actually don't like you. I don't want to be with you but promise me something. If you
01:07:01
respond anything what? Yeah, girly. >> Like, what the [ __ ] >> Girly mama. >> It's rough in the book. It's rough.
01:07:09
>> Yeah, that's >> And it's And it's rough in the movie, but it's rough in the book.
01:07:13
>> So, that whole thing, she gets left in the middle of the [ __ ] woods after she tries to run after him. She's like,
01:07:18
"Edward." And then she runs after him. >> She actually says it exact. [laughter]
01:07:21
Edward, wait. And then she just falls down and just lays on which is like, >> "Can I just say something?"
01:07:27
>> Heartbreaking. >> Oh, it is. She just lays on the ground and cries. It's so sad. It's so
01:07:33
pathetic. It is. But you're just like you have no basis of any relationship and you have [clears throat] very like
01:07:41
her mom >> is a wreck. >> Is and absent. >> Yeah. >> Like she's obviously it's not like
01:07:47
someone especially in the book Charlie absent like just not she has no she does no concept of like what real love is.
01:07:56
>> And this is just like earthshattering to her that like the thing she thought was
01:08:01
love isn't that. Yeah, >> it's so sad. It is pathetic, but it's like you look at it and you're just
01:08:06
like, damn. >> It's it's horrible >> cuz you also you forget cuz to me she comes off so young in this.
01:08:13
>> Yeah. >> Like it's like 15 16 and then you're like just turned 18. Like damn, get up.
01:08:19
>> That's go about your life. >> Get up. >> You got to shift at Newton's. >> And Sam finds her in the woods and his
01:08:26
wolf form. Sam is one of the Quillute tribes. You skipped over the fact though that they literally had to send a
01:08:32
[ __ ] search. >> They think she's dead. >> Like Edward left her so far in the woods
01:08:37
and she passes out. >> The both of them are so just [ __ ] reckless that they have to get a search
01:08:44
party involved. >> Like Charlie literally has to become like chief of homicide in that moment
01:08:49
and like find her. >> Yep. And it's like the Quillute tribe are obviously helping because they're
01:08:55
friends with Charlie and they're >> and they can like sniff out the woods. >> And so there uh Sam who ends up being
01:09:01
the alpha of the tribe. We will learn. He finds her and picks her up and brings her back.
01:09:06
>> Just emerges out of the woods with her >> shirtless and jorts out of the woods.
01:09:09
>> Can you imagine being Charlie in that moment? Not Jorts carrying my daughter out of the woods. [laughter]
01:09:15
>> Not abort. He was probably like, "My life was [laughter] so simple. >> Go back. Go back to Arizona."
01:09:23
>> Simple before you came. >> He says, "Give me a call." >> Now I'm [laughter] like sitting here
01:09:28
having to watch a man in jorts with no shirt on carry you out of the woods. A >> couple months ago, you fell down a
01:09:34
flight of stairs, fell through a [ __ ] late glass window, came back with a [ __ ] bite mark on your arm.
01:09:40
>> On your arm that moves, by the way, that shifts. >> It's crazy. >> Local legend. is that your boyfriend's a
01:09:48
[ __ ] vampire. >> This is when we get our >> it's a possibility. [singing] >> And we just circle around her
01:09:57
>> months. And in the book, she does the thing where she has blank pages with just the month on it, which I think is a
01:10:04
really clever. It's a good way of doing it. >> I remember watching this and just like
01:10:10
as a child sobbing ugly Titanic ugly tears. I said he loved you. >> And there's random trick-or-treaters in
01:10:20
[laughter] your yard. People are trespassing on your property, Bella. Call the police. Oh, wait. Your dad's a
01:10:26
police chief. [laughter] It's so [ __ ] She's in the same pair of sweatpants. >> Same. And she's just staring deadeyed
01:10:34
outside. >> It's awesome. >> And it just The camera just like spins around her. >> I'm sorry, but are we to believe that
01:10:40
she just sits there for months? Mh. >> Like, does she get up? You see little bits of her getting up, but like sitting
01:10:49
and just staring off into the distance. Charlie trying to >> I'm like, does she miss four months?
01:10:53
Like, what the [ __ ] And like then we get the screaming nightmares where she wakes up in the middle of the night just
01:10:59
screaming bloody murder. >> The screaming nightmares are where as a parent, I would draw the [ __ ] line.
01:11:05
That's when you've >> you got to get professionals involved. >> Yeah, you got to get some help. I mean,
01:11:09
this is cuz there's [laughter] a part there's a part where where Charlie poor >> Charlie
01:11:16
>> poor Charlie [laughter] is just trying to he's trying to do the dad thing or the parent thing really and at night one
01:11:22
of the greatest things you'll ever have as a parent is when you just fall asleep
01:11:25
on that couch downstairs [laughter] cuz it's been a long day and then you wake up at some unknown time and you're
01:11:30
like I got to get upstairs but he's fallen asleep in front of the TV and she just starts screaming in her sleep and
01:11:36
you he like jumps up and is like and like goes to walk upstairs and I was like, "She's 18."
01:11:42
>> Yeah. >> He probably was like, "What? I thought this ended in elementary school." Like
01:11:47
when like nightmares. >> It doesn't. >> Nope. Not with Bella. >> No, not with She's going to bring you
01:11:52
right back. She said, "You thought you thought you could sit in front of the TV."
01:11:56
>> It's crazy. >> And then she's just sitting at alone at the Cullen's lunch table, which I think
01:12:02
is >> diabolical. so far beyond the realm of like I would literally this is when I
01:12:09
said Bella needs a [ __ ] Capricorn friend at that table sit there for maybe a day and watch that
01:12:16
[ __ ] sit at that empty table >> the next day I would get up I would walk over there and I'd say listen
01:12:24
>> get your >> listen sniffles >> either >> not sniffles >> get over it and come sit at their
01:12:30
[ __ ] table don't this is stupid or get the [ __ ] out of my ey line while you're doing it because this is dumb
01:12:37
because also >> I'm not watching you sit there and mope at their table. That's insane.
01:12:41
>> I can't imagine watching my friend do this after dating this guy for a few months.
01:12:46
>> That's the other thing. >> Like that's the biggest thing. This isn't years. It's crazy.
01:12:52
>> And this it's the table. The table just gets me cuz I'm also like that's attention seeking.
01:12:57
>> Next thing you know, she walks in wearing a peacacoat. That's a tent. Literally, [laughter]
01:13:02
>> she she buys a Volvo. >> She just play >> starts starts triple parking. >> She walks in with a bag of eggs and
01:13:09
plays a carrot like the kazoo at the table [laughter] like that's where she she alternates
01:13:15
between a paint small and a peac coat. [laughter] [gasps] She starts like, you know,
01:13:21
bringing someone in that's supposed to be her brother but isn't. >> Oh man. Um, but yeah, it's attention
01:13:26
seeking at this point cuz it's in public and you're literally doing that for the
01:13:29
whole cafeteria to wonder what's wrong with you. But then somebody will walk out up to you, no doubt, and say, "Hey,
01:13:35
you okay?" And you'll say, "Please don't ask me about this. It's private." Even though you're sitting in public. She's
01:13:41
that girl who goes on Facebook >> and says, "I'm going really bad time right now.
01:13:47
>> Please don't pry. Please, >> please don't pry. Allow my privacy during this tragedy.
01:13:52
>> Allow my privacy. It's ridiculous. So, at one point, Charlie says, "It's just
01:13:57
not normal this behavior. Quite frankly, it's scaring the hell out of me." And I
01:14:02
said, "Preachie, preach, [laughter] it's scaring us as viewers." >> I said, "Yes."
01:14:07
>> I said, "I'm scared about this fictional character being." >> So, she's like, "Don't worry, Dad." Cuz
01:14:13
he's like, "I think you should just get the [ __ ] out of here and go back with your [laughter]
01:14:16
>> That's the thing." He's like, "I called your mom. You got to get the [ __ ] out."
01:14:20
and he's like, "I just want to fall asleep in front of the TV again. >> I miss ESPN.
01:14:24
>> I just miss [laughter] it." And she's like, [snorts] "No, it's cool. I'm fine.
01:14:28
This is my home now. I love Forks. I'm not leaving." And he's like, "Awesome." >> Can we also point out that like in the
01:14:32
middle of like his daughter like screaming in the middle of the night and just being a general walking coma
01:14:37
person. He's also dealing with all these weird attacks. Yeah. >> And like whatever else is on his police
01:14:44
docket. >> Yeah. Like people are getting eaten. Hikers are getting eaten >> too much.
01:14:47
>> So he's like weird prince in the woods. Yeah. And so she's like, "Don't worry
01:14:51
about it." She's like, "I'm going I'm going to go shopping with Jessica. I'm going to have a girl tonight." And he's
01:14:57
like, "Okay." Like, "Bye." >> He literally is like, "Buy lots of shit." >> Yeah. Bye.
01:15:02
>> And so she calls Jessica and I love it cuz she's like, "Hey, Jessica, it's Bella."
01:15:08
>> Yeah. Bella Swan. >> And when I was first watching, I was like, "What?" And then I'm like, "Oh, I
01:15:13
hope Jessica was being a complete and was like, "Bella? Bella who? I don't know Bella." And Bella's like being such
01:15:19
a dick that she's like Bella Bella Swan, you don't remember me. Like she's that in her own like
01:15:25
>> it's me, Bella [laughter] here. >> Come on. >> But this is a classic. Bella is not like
01:15:33
the other girls. Like she always combat shopping. She doesn't like that. She's like, "Oh, okay. We get it."
01:15:39
>> Jessica, however, is hilarious. >> I love her. >> Um and I think she's a girls girl
01:15:43
personally. Last, remember last movie when Mike asked her to the dance? She asked Bella
01:15:50
if it was okay. When she's known Mike since she was in preschool and Bella just showed up four minutes ago and
01:15:56
she's asking Bella for permission even though Bella has no interest in him, but she's like, "Is it weird? I don't know."
01:16:01
>> Yeah. You know what? >> That's girl behavior. Girls girl. And to even honestly like
01:16:05
>> to even go out with Bella when she's been displaying such a dick. >> Like we only get to see her in the
01:16:11
cafeteria. Imagine that [ __ ] in class. >> Exactly. She's like when she has to look
01:16:15
at slides, it must be next level. >> I'm saying she goes through a whole thing about cuz they saw a zombie movie
01:16:21
and she's like and Jessica's take on it. She's like leprosy is not a joke. >> Yeah. She's like, I have a cousin who
01:16:27
has leprosy. It's not funny. >> It's not funny. And then she's like, is it supposed to be consumerism because
01:16:31
like whatever. Like and she goes through this whole thing like are you so >> Some girls love shopping.
01:16:35
>> Like you're so pleased with your own self-reerential [ __ ] And I was like Jessica's got it. Jessica's on it. She
01:16:42
got She would be fun to hang out with. Let's talk about zombie movies. Let's go.
01:16:46
>> Um, but as she's talking about this, she's like, and you know, like your depression thing, like I get it, but
01:16:52
like you got to get she goes, I have stuff going on, too. And she starts saying, Mike said he just wants to be
01:16:58
friends, >> which is hard. >> This she's also going through a breakup. >> This is the point of the conversation
01:17:04
when you hear her start to say, "Mike said he just wants to be friends." That Bella checks up. literally checks out.
01:17:12
You only hear Jessica say that fading out, >> but you can see that she's still talking.
01:17:16
>> Oh, yeah. She's saying it. She's like, and she's still talking about it as Bella is looking at these bikers over
01:17:22
there. >> As soon as this conversation went away from something Bella about Bella or what
01:17:30
she's interested in, she went whoop. She didn't give a [ __ ] about Jessica's problem. She didn't want to hear Jessica
01:17:35
being like, "Hey, Mike said he just wants to be friends and I'm bummed about it and like, can I talk?" Nope. Only
01:17:40
Bella can be going through a breakup right now. >> Bella's going through Bella's problem is
01:17:44
bigger. Bella has narcissistic tendencies up the walls. >> I told you she's baby girl. She's baby
01:17:49
girl. So baby girl here. And I that was so egregious. I was like, are you kidding me? Couldn't care less about
01:17:56
anyone else's problems. It happens again, too. >> But the way I would assume in this
01:18:01
moment that Bella has just [ __ ] lost it cuz she has. The way she walks towards these bikers and Jessica's
01:18:07
literally like, "Are you good? Like what's going on? >> She just abandons Jessica
01:18:13
>> in a seedy part of town. >> In a seedy part of town, leaves her by herself, gets on this, she walks up to
01:18:18
this biker who like >> wait, she actually first she starts walking up and then she stops and she's
01:18:23
like, "Oh, I thought I knew turns around, walks back, stops, walks around again."
01:18:28
>> I'm like, "What are you doing?" >> I feel like those bikers would be like, "No, thank you." Like I'd be I'd be
01:18:32
like, "Something's going on here. >> You're more cuckoo than us. >> Yeah, you're having a moment."
01:18:36
>> Uhuh. But she walks up to this one and he's like, "Hey girl." I'm surprised he
01:18:39
wasn't like, "Are you the fence?" >> He literally bites the way he bites it. He literally is like, "What's up?" Like
01:18:46
he just [laughter] >> It's not for me. It's not for me. >> I was screaming. I was like I was like,
01:18:51
"Good for you for giving it a shot. >> It's not for me." >> The lip bite kills me. He's literally
01:18:56
like, "Ew, stop. Stop. Stop. She keeps doing the bike." >> No, I don't. And I was like,
01:19:03
>> and they're not wearing helmets. This is also not in the book. >> No. So in the book she doesn't go with
01:19:09
she sees them but she doesn't go with them because Edward tells her to stop. She leaves with Jessica like right away
01:19:16
like doesn't go on the bike ride. So that was boring. >> Um so she goes on that bike ride. She's
01:19:20
like well what a rush. And Jessica when she sees you're going to be more of a [ __ ] pain in the ass. And that's when
01:19:26
she saw Edward cuz Edward was like hey stop turn around. And she's like no. >> Yeah. Now, she now is excited about this
01:19:34
cuz she's like, "Ooh, I can see Edward when I do dumb [ __ ] >> I can put myself in life-threatening
01:19:40
situations and then I will hallucinate my boyfriend who left me in the middle of the woods."
01:19:46
>> Also, again, with his entire [laughter] family, >> such a wild thing for young kid, like
01:19:51
young girls especially, to be reading or witnessing. >> Yeah. It's her doing the dumbest [ __ ]
01:19:57
because again, it's not quite clear whether she's really seeing or hearing Edward or not.
01:20:02
>> They should have spiced this up a little more and made it YA because this being
01:20:06
YA is dangerous as [ __ ] It is. >> I'm going to be reading like when I have children, I will be reading every book
01:20:12
that they read. >> Yeah. Just to make sure cuz the themes are just like >> Yeah. The themes are not good. Like
01:20:18
>> it explains so much about who I used to be. Oh yeah. I mean, it's definitely the
01:20:22
And again, we're looking at it from like an adult perspective. Kids, young people
01:20:26
would eat this up like we did. >> Like we did. >> So, she finds these two like scrap bikes
01:20:31
and she brings them to Jacob to fix for free so she can see her boyfriend again.
01:20:35
>> Mhm. >> Like re really take that one in. >> She also Jacob who is like very clearly
01:20:41
infatuated with her from the moment he lays eyes on her again. >> She brings him junk and says, "Can you
01:20:47
fix these bikes for me for free?" And she's doing this so that she can see her boyfriend who abandoned her in the woods
01:20:54
again. >> Yeah. Yep. She also, I don't know if this is in the straight up movie or if
01:20:59
it's the extended cut, but like some guy stops by with those bikes beforehand like before throwing them out. And
01:21:04
Charlie's like, "What are you doing?" >> Oh, yeah. >> And Charlie's like, she knows how
01:21:08
Charlie feels about this, too. Like he doesn't want people on motorcycles. >> And she's like
01:21:12
>> And she's like, "I'm going to get on a motorcycle and I'm going to I'm going to
01:21:16
make Jake fix it for me. I'm going to make Charlie worry about me. I don't give a [ __ ] about Jessica and I'm
01:21:22
abandoning all my other friends except for Jake. >> It's all >> And the only reason I'm friends with
01:21:27
Jake is because he can offer me this service. >> Exactly. >> And like make me feel good every now and
01:21:32
then. >> And me being in his presence makes him feel like there's a chance. So if I can
01:21:36
do that, I can get what I want out of it. And I get a little I'm like, damn. >> Yeah. You [ __ ] [ __ ] This is the
01:21:43
moment though where we say Bella, where the hell have you been loc which is a [ __ ] wild masterpiece is what you
01:21:51
meant. >> A wild line. It's not in the book. >> This was specifically for the movie.
01:21:56
>> I need to know who wrote that in. And I need to high five. >> Might have been Katherine Hardwick. I
01:22:01
don't know. >> Or no, wasn't it a Wasn't it a different >> Oh, no. This Yeah, this was another one.
01:22:04
So, you're >> Well, I would like to high five this man. >> Yeah. Whoever did this, they start
01:22:08
talking about like age again. It comes up again. age is like a like heavy ass theme.
01:22:12
>> And he says something like when he says, "What are you like 40 now?" Which I was
01:22:16
like, "Okay." That didn't even bother me. I was like, "Whatever." But then she goes, "I feel like it." And I was like,
01:22:20
"What does it feel like, Bella?" Cuz I feel [ __ ] great. I feel better than you've ever felt. You watching this
01:22:26
movie, I'm like, "You're 18 years old. You're in far dire streets than I am, bitch." Okay. I feel foot loose and
01:22:32
fancy free compared to you. >> You said I'm doing my Metacube masks. And what do you know about it?
01:22:37
>> I feel better than you, Bella. I listen to soft jazz in the morning. What do you
01:22:41
do >> on an old timey radio? You [ __ ] [ __ ] >> What do you do? What do you need?
01:22:47
>> What do you mean you feel 40? Doesn't sound like it. You sound like a whiny little 18-year-old is what you sound
01:22:53
like. >> Right in the kisser. >> And then she's sitting there with him while he's fixing the bike and she turns
01:22:57
off the radio and she's like, I don't really like music anymore. >> Pick me. Pick me.
01:23:02
>> Shut the [ __ ] up. Pick me. Pick me. Pick me. >> Shut the [ __ ] up. That's like that kind
01:23:07
of [ __ ] I'm like, "Stop it." >> Yeah. >> It's also a good song. I think that's
01:23:10
like when it's like >> you don't like music anymore. Too bad. You're in his garage and he's fixing
01:23:16
your [ __ ] for you. So, if he wants to listen to music, >> sorry, baby. >> Yeah.
01:23:19
>> Like, it's not your place. That's your bike on your own. >> You don't have to listen. You can live
01:23:24
in a blobby world with no music at your on your own terms. >> A grip. You were sitting in that chair
01:23:29
listening to Licky Lee for months. >> Exactly. For months. >> Months. Bella. And then later, I love it
01:23:35
because she comes home and Charlie's like, "Hey, like he's not coming back, Edward." So, he's literally like, "I
01:23:42
don't know, maybe settle for Jacob." Like, that's essentially what he says. >> And he was Does he say he says, "You got
01:23:47
to love what's good for you sometimes." >> So, he's literally like, >> I don't know, try to like him.
01:23:55
>> I'm like, whoa, >> we are setting up really, really bad [ __ ] here. When they're driving at one point, Jake
01:24:02
and Bella, they see Sam and like a few of the other tribe members >> and they were like Jake's friends,
01:24:09
>> but now they're not hanging out. >> But now they're all of a sudden super buff, shirtless hanging out with Sam.
01:24:14
>> Only and he calls Sam like a cult leader. Y >> and he's like, "Yeah." And you can tell
01:24:18
like it annoys Jake. He's like, "I don't know." Cuz he doesn't know what it's about yet.
01:24:22
>> Um but Sam is actually the al alpha. So that's what's happening here. >> And bloomer. He is a late bloomer. And
01:24:31
why don't I talk about like kind of the lore with this now? [clears throat] So they are shape shifters. They can
01:24:38
phase by choice. >> Um but they in order to be a Quillu tribe member in this movie that phases
01:24:45
like transforms. You have to be able to trace a direct bloodline to the original
01:24:50
shape shifter. Okay. Not all of them can shape shift. >> Makes sense. >> A lot of them are men. There's only one
01:24:55
woman who has shapeshifted. That's Leah Clearwater. We'll get to her. You'll get
01:24:59
a lot more of her in the third book, I believe. >> Third movie. >> Yeah. If not, the next one.
01:25:04
>> Yeah. Um >> I actually don't know if she's an Eclipse or if she doesn't come until
01:25:08
break. >> I thought she was. >> I don't remember. I can't remember. >> Yeah. >> Um but apparently, and I thought this
01:25:14
was interesting, there's a there's a window of time where the transformation can happen. Okay. If you're going to
01:25:20
transform >> and like it's this small window of time when like puberty essentially happens.
01:25:25
Um, and you will only transform if you are in proximity to a vampire. >> Yeah. Like your first transformation
01:25:33
will not happen at all if you never come in contact with a vampire. >> That is actually very interesting to
01:25:38
you. Like I think that's cool. [snorts] It is. It's interesting. So if you don't
01:25:42
sniff around a vampire at any point in that transformation window, you will never phase. You won't know that you had
01:25:49
that. So I wonder if that's like part of the reason why Jacob hates Edward. because he knows it's like partially his
01:25:57
fault. >> Yeah. You know what I mean? Because the reason that like all of a sudden there
01:26:01
was this huge like outburst of people transferring is because the Cullins came which became a proximity thing and now
01:26:10
all these kids are suddenly popping up and phasing because they're in proximity and now all their window of
01:26:17
transformation has happened all at once. So it's like they're all popping up. >> It's kind of funny.
01:26:21
>> So which is interesting. So werewolves are like super fast, like crazy fast. Can outrun a car, all that [ __ ]
01:26:27
>> Not a vampire. >> Not a vampire, though. >> Cuz they're fast. Cuz they're fast.
01:26:34
>> Fast. >> What up there? >> Uh, their eyesight is 10 times sharper than a human's eyesight.
01:26:40
>> To them, vampires look like a walking crystal essentially. >> That's kind of cool.
01:26:46
>> They look like angly and weird. >> Yeah. always or just after they become a werewolf? [laughter]
01:26:53
>> I'm not really sure. >> Like when Jacob first met Edward, he was like he was like a
01:26:58
>> this angular [ __ ] >> He looked like a Picasso like an early Picasso but just sparkly.
01:27:04
>> That's what I pictured. >> Long head. >> It's like a walking Picasso painting
01:27:07
with like all the features in different ways and like super angled and >> Yeah, I'm picturing like um Gumpy but
01:27:14
like sharp like Gumpy. This guy who was always a pen. He was always a pen. >> Gumby, right? That's
01:27:22
>> what's going on. >> Yeah, Gumby. [laughter] >> What's happened? >> Gumby. Oh, Gumby. Gumby. When you said
01:27:28
he was always a pen. >> Yeah, there was pens at him. >> Oh, okay. >> You know what I'm saying?
01:27:33
>> I I was thinking Gumby when you brought him up, but then you said the pen thing
01:27:37
and it threw me off. >> You never saw a Gumby pen? >> No, I don't think I [laughter]
01:27:41
>> You were like he was always a pen. I was like he was not a pen. Like >> maybe he wasn't.
01:27:46
>> I [laughter] don't think he was. Maybe I just feel I'm sure somebody has a Gumby
01:27:50
pen. >> Yeah, for sure. >> Um maybe not though because I'm [laughter] looking at Google images
01:27:54
right now and there's not a lot >> you and you literally said he was always a pen. That's why I was [laughter] like,
01:27:58
"Oh, that's not Gumby." Like [gasps] what? >> Gumby. >> So, so the pack, the Quillute like
01:28:05
werewolves pack. >> Yes. Yes. >> They share group mind so they can hear each other's thoughts.
01:28:10
>> Okay. >> Uh which becomes a real problem for Leah being the only woman in the pack later.
01:28:14
>> Oh, we will get there. Don't worry. When we get to her situation, you will feel
01:28:20
all for Leah. Yeah. >> They also like you had they have to obey the alpha. They don't have a choice.
01:28:26
>> Um they heal really quickly once they transform like once their first phase happens. Their aging will speed up until
01:28:34
they reach the age of 25 and then they stop aging. >> Obsessed. >> Yeah. So they'll get like they'll
01:28:40
quickly get older but stay at 25. So that would be a problem even if she was with Jake
01:28:46
>> and there's nothing he could even do about it. >> Yeah, because he'll stop aging.
01:28:50
>> Wow. >> Yeah, >> that's interesting. I don't I didn't even remember that. >> Yeah, we'll get they do mention
01:28:57
imprinting in New Moon obviously becomes a problem. >> Yeah. >> Later. >> Yeah. >> Um what it is is apparently being
01:29:04
unconditionally tied to a member of the opposite sex. Always the opposite sex. >> Homophobic. So you cannot
01:29:12
>> That's literally homophobia. >> It really is like cuz it specifically says homophobia opposite sex.
01:29:18
>> Um >> and apparently once you see the object of the imprinting that you don't know
01:29:23
that's going to happen, but once you come upon the person you're going to imprint on, you will do anything to
01:29:30
please and protect that person. >> Upsetting. >> All other commitments in his life, like
01:29:36
the werewolf's life, are secondary. even commitment to the pack. Everything becomes secondary to that person.
01:29:44
>> Interesting. >> The werewolf will completely transform everything about themselves to become
01:29:50
what that person needs or wants. So they will abandon any individuality or any preferences or any choice to become
01:29:58
whatever that person wants. >> That's wicked healthy. [laughter] >> I'm like that's wicked healthy. I'm
01:30:03
like, [ __ ] you have created the most [ __ ] up relationship sick. Like toxic as all hell.
01:30:10
>> They will give up everything >> just to be with that person also be forced into being like around
01:30:20
everything that that person loves. So if they they have to by no choice of their
01:30:25
own like the people that that person likes, like what the everything about it, >> that could get so crazy.
01:30:30
>> Yeah. And it said, according to the illustrated guide, if the human is young that they're imprinting on, the werewolf
01:30:39
becomes the perfect platonic, playmate, and protector. >> Putting platonic and playmate in the
01:30:45
same sentence is diabolical. >> As the human ages and changes, the werewolf instinctively switches roles to
01:30:53
fulfill the human's needs. So grooming. >> Yeah. >> Okay. So the whole Reneesme thing when
01:31:00
everybody's like, "Oh my god, it's not that big a deal." It's a big deal. She's He's waiting. This [ __ ] is
01:31:06
waiting and wait, >> it's literally grooming >> until she becomes age appropriate.
01:31:10
>> It's involuntary grooming. >> Meets her as an infant. >> Can't wait for her to become age
01:31:15
appropriate. That is so beyond [ __ ] up. >> But can and will wait. >> Yeah. [sighs]
01:31:25
Like I I just read a story to the girls the other night called It Came From the Sky. That's a great book. You need to
01:31:32
read it. It's so fun. Okay. >> And it says in it, "Nobody is more patient than a spider."
01:31:37
>> And I beg to differ. [laughter] >> I didn't know when you said, "I read a book to the girls the other night," what
01:31:44
journey you were going to take. >> Nobody's more patient than a werewolf who was imprinted.
01:31:49
>> Yeah, just saying. Uh, my brain right now is like, [cheering] you know, when you shake up one of those
01:31:57
bottles and you make a tornado. That's my brain right now. >> Yeah. I just wrote what at the end of
01:32:02
[laughter] the >> What? Why would you volunteer or anything, but like [laughter] Steph,
01:32:12
I'm not trying to come at you, bro, but like why would you voluntarily tell us this and like make this [laughter] make
01:32:17
this lore? >> That's just This was voluntary. You didn't have to. really don't want that.
01:32:22
>> It's like voluntarily telling us that Jasper is a Confederate [laughter] soldier. Like
01:32:28
weird. >> I don't need it. Um but yeah, so that's that. >> The the Quillutes and the Vampires or
01:32:36
the Cullens, excuse me, specifically have a treaty that happened a long time ago. Okay. That was like I think it was
01:32:44
like Jacob's like great great grandfather who started this whole like it's one of his family
01:32:48
>> descendants as or ascendants. They did this. Yeah. They did this treaty with Carile because Carile's a billion years
01:32:54
old. And so their their whole treaty was that they were going to leave each other
01:32:59
alone. >> Yeah. >> Oh, I remember what we saw in the first movie, the little flashback.
01:33:03
>> The Cullens had to promise not to hurt humans and hunt them. And they had to promise to stay off of Quilly Land.
01:33:11
>> How weird is that? That Edward met Jacob's great greatgrandfather. >> I know. Isn't that crazy?
01:33:16
>> Yes. That's why he's like, >> "Boy, little [ __ ] boy. >> Little [ __ ] Get out of here."
01:33:21
>> Hey, son. >> Like, Jacob is of the generation that Bella is. >> Yeah. >> So, technically, Yeah. It goes too far.
01:33:31
>> You can't think on it too much. It'll break your brain. >> Yeah. You can't marinate in that too
01:33:35
much [laughter] or it's going to get rotten. >> How many generations older is Edward
01:33:39
than Bella? Wow. Who can be sure? Uh, >> probably somebody on an online form, >> I'm sure. But that at some point Bella
01:33:47
jumps on one of those bikes that she made Jacob fix for her. >> Oh, doesn't she get like thrown into a
01:33:53
rock? She does. And when she begins the to start the bike, Edward appears and puts his hand on her hand in vision form
01:34:00
and he just goes stop [sighs and gasps] >> and the ways [laughter] he's like stop.
01:34:06
I feel like that's silly. Uh but she crashes and he Jacob comes to her rescue also. She crashes and she gets internal
01:34:14
bleeding and I will not be told [laughter] otherwise. She flies against that rock.
01:34:19
>> Yeah. >> Like >> really really hard. >> And she sits up and says, "I want to go
01:34:25
again." But her mouth says something different. >> Yes. >> I can't tell what it was.
01:34:29
>> And then she looks up at Jacob and says, "You're sort of beautiful." >> And I I need to stand in in honesty
01:34:36
right now. That's a killer line. >> Yeah. >> A killer line to say to somebody. I I
01:34:41
was unaware of Bella's like potential to have game cuz that was like a real you're sort of beautiful is cuz like he
01:34:48
is it's a killer line and also somewhat of a read because it's she could just look up at him and be like you're
01:34:53
beautiful but I think she was literally just being like holy [ __ ] like I'm looking at you right now this close for
01:34:59
the first time and like she's I think that was supposed that's part of the game is you're being a little co like a
01:35:04
little koi and being like you're sort of beautiful. >> The sort of would take me out. I'd be
01:35:08
like, "Oh, back in the day." Wow. A memory just infiltrated my brain. Back in the day, it used to be this thing on
01:35:15
Facebook where it would be like like and I'll rate you and like say a fact about
01:35:18
you and people would like each other's statuses. And then on your Facebook page, they would rate you from 1 to 10.
01:35:25
So, it's kind of like being called an eight when somebody calls you sort of beautiful.
01:35:29
>> That's how Facebook began is Mark Zuckerberg thinking he had any [ __ ] ground to stand on to rate another human
01:35:36
being how they looked. looking from his [ __ ] goblin ass point of view. >> He did that voluntarily.
01:35:41
>> Yeah. Um, >> you're sort of beautiful. >> I think this it's the way she's not
01:35:46
saying it like you're sort of beautiful. Like that's not how that's coming out. Somebody looking deep into your eye and
01:35:52
being like you're sort of beautiful. It would be like at that age you'd be like wow.
01:35:56
>> Well, he loves Jacob is like excuse me. >> Also Jake is he is sort of beautiful.
01:36:02
Like that's just that's like >> I was like damn that really hit girl. Yeah. >> So, you're like, "Dang, Bella, where the
01:36:09
hell you been?" >> I did. I said, "Where the hell you been, Loca? Where did that come from?" Uh, but
01:36:14
the whole thing is like people have been seeing bears in the area. We were talking about it earlier. You know,
01:36:19
Charlie's been trying to figure out who it is. Are they getting what they think are bears? Hikers have died, like a few
01:36:24
of them. Uh, they're actually werewolves um that they're seeing, but it's something else that's killing people and
01:36:30
hurting people, but people are seeing the werewolves and thinking they have something to do with it. Um, yeah.
01:36:37
Rachel Lefbre, I think it is. [sighs and gasps] >> Unreal. >> She was iconic in this role. I'm sorry.
01:36:43
Bryce Dallas Howard is great. >> She's a great actress, >> but and she's beautiful.
01:36:48
>> Rachel ate this role up. >> She's scary. >> Genuinely scary in this one. >> She's got this like look in her eye.
01:36:55
>> Oh, she's so good. >> That Bryce Dallas Howard just doesn't like deliver the same.
01:36:59
>> And we're going to get to the my favorite scene in the entire movie in a minute. Um, but Bella, like so I think
01:37:06
like her friends at lunch are talking about this and Angela thinks she saw one of the bears.
01:37:12
>> Bella finally joins them at lunch again. Just walks over out of nowhere and sits
01:37:16
with them and they're all like, "What the fuck?" >> They're also just like such good people
01:37:20
because they're just like, "Okay, like sit down, crazy [ __ ] >> That's a okay, crazy [ __ ] [laughter]
01:37:25
Just sit down." They're just like, "All right, here you are again." And Mike takes this as an
01:37:30
opportunity to ask her out, >> which isn't Jessica like right there? >> Yeah, that's why I'm like, "Mike, shut
01:37:38
up." >> Yeah, it's very nice. >> The way he says this, I took I actually took a recording of it. No,
01:37:44
>> you didn't. >> Because this would make me fly into orbit. >> Oh gosh. >> So, this is what he says when she
01:37:52
>> walks back to the thing. >> Okay, that's Well, welcome. Um, so listen, you know, now now that you know,
01:38:01
you're talking and uh eating again, which you know, got to get protein in there.
01:38:09
>> When he says got to get that protein in there like pokes her, I would I would
01:38:17
say respectfully, >> he essentially asleep. >> He essentially just spoonfed choo choo.
01:38:24
>> He essentially just >> that protein in there. >> Choo choo. I said, "Oh, you're at the
01:38:29
task." After that, >> I would crawl under the lunch table and never emerge. [laughter]
01:38:34
>> I was watching it. I said, "Oh, Mike, no." >> It's [laughter] You said that so carefully. Oh, Mike,
01:38:46
no. [laughter] Like, Eric should have literally said that. Oh, Mike, no. It's [laughter] the way his voice like
01:38:56
yuck. That's how you talk to a little kid. [laughter] They're like, "Get that protein."
01:39:02
>> And she's just like, "Okay, >> okay." And she agrees to call >> and he's like, "You want to go to a
01:39:07
movie?" And like there's like a romantic comedy that we could see. And I love it
01:39:11
cuz she literally goes She goes, "Um, do you know like Face Punch? It's called Face Punch." [laughter]
01:39:18
And she's like, "I would love to see Face Punch." And she's like, "Everyone, do you want to see Face Punch with us?
01:39:22
Face Punch. Wanu." And they're all like, "Punch face. Let's go." And I was like,
01:39:26
"Poor Mike. He's just there." But I was like, "You cooked your own [ __ ] chicken there with
01:39:30
>> You cooked [laughter] your own your own protein there with your protein in there.
01:39:35
>> Oh god, kill me." >> Um, and luckily lucky for him almost is that everybody gets sick and can't go.
01:39:42
Jessica just bails, which also I was like, "Yeah, no shit." Of course, >> because before [laughter] we go to this
01:39:46
scene, Jessica goes, "Movie night with Bella. >> [laughter] >> She's like, "I could think of 70 things
01:39:55
I'd rather do." >> I said, "Correct [laughter] reaction, Jessica." Cuz you know, she's like, "Are
01:40:00
you [ __ ] kidding me? >> Yeah. >> You've abandoned me in the streets." >> Yeah.
01:40:04
>> And they were dating again for a couple months. Like that's shitty. >> And she likes Mike. She just watched
01:40:09
Mike ask Bella out. >> Yeah. >> And she's like, "Yeah, no. I don't want to go on your date with you. Thank you
01:40:14
so much. Movie night with Bella. >> I love her. >> But everybody's sick. Nobody can come."
01:40:18
And so it's just Jacob and Mike. [clears throat] >> Jacob is trying. >> Of course it's just Jacob and Mike.
01:40:25
Because all of the boys Something about Bella's milkshake brings them to the yard.
01:40:30
>> Brings them all. >> And they're like, "It's better than yours." >> Yeah. And Jessica's like, "No, it's
01:40:34
not." >> She's like, "No, it's actually putrid and rancid." >> Yeah. And Jacob's trying to be nice in
01:40:40
this scene at first, to be honest. Doesn't end up that way, but he he certainly tries
01:40:44
>> when they're both sitting there with their hands open. I would with the hands. Oh my god. I went on a date with
01:40:49
a guy that did that once and I literally wanted to like stab my eyes out. >> You know, John tells a funny story. I
01:40:55
don't remember this, but maybe it wasn't traumatizing for me. It was traumatizing
01:41:00
for him. So maybe that's why it's burning. We went one of our first dates. >> We went to a movie theater where you
01:41:06
could bring the armrest up. >> He lifted the armrest up. I slammed it back down. [laughter]
01:41:16
>> What? Why [laughter] did you do that? I don't remember. I think it was just like I said,
01:41:23
absolutely. >> Don't touch [laughter] me. I'm sterile. >> What the [ __ ] >> And he will tell you to this day that he
01:41:29
remembers it vividly. >> Of course he does. He wakes up and thinks about [laughter] it. Holy [ __ ]
01:41:35
>> It turned out all right. Four of my things. >> Yeah. Three kids in a marriage later. I
01:41:39
feel like we're okay. >> Damn, [ __ ] >> Like I'm like, damn. Like 20 years later,
01:41:44
>> that's reckless. >> He still will be like, I remember that. And I felt that sting.
01:41:48
>> That's reckless. >> I don't know. It must have been instinctually I was just like, "No,
01:41:52
man." >> Something crazy runs in our family because before me and Drew's first kiss,
01:41:55
I literally said, "Fuck you." >> Wow. >> Yeah. So, >> damn. See, I was I was very scarred from
01:42:00
my last relationship. So, I think I was like, "Don't touch me. Get away." [laughter]
01:42:05
>> That's so stupid. >> Just slammed it right back down. >> I can literally picture John in that
01:42:09
moment just being like, >> he was just like, "Oh, >> like just laser eye focus [laughter]
01:42:13
down at the floor." He took it very well apparently cuz I didn't even know it happened.
01:42:17
>> Well, you know what? It, like you said, it worked out. >> It worked out. U, >> that's so reckless.
01:42:22
>> But also, Mike uh really reads uh Jacob for filth when he says, "Are you even
01:42:27
old enough to see this movie?" Especially cuz Jacob's response is not, "Yes, I am." It's, "Bella bought my
01:42:33
ticket." >> Ew. >> And I said, "This got weird." >> Yeah. >> This got weird fast.
01:42:39
>> Yeah. >> And I'd like to be let out. >> I'll be out on this corner. [laughter]
01:42:43
I want to be out. >> Yeah, the the hands up thing. So weird, >> upsetting. >> This is when like, you know, Mike gets
01:42:51
sick, he gets the flu that everybody has, which I don't think anybody was appropriately stressed out about that to
01:42:57
be honest. When you're that age, >> as soon as somebody is like, I think I have the neurovirus. I'm like, well, I
01:43:01
guess this is curtains for me. >> Actually, please don't even say that in front of me. No, they and they have a
01:43:07
whole discussion, Jacob and Bella, while Mike's puking in the bathroom that and he says, "I'm not going to give up." And
01:43:13
her response is, "I don't want you to, but it's because I don't want you to go anywhere." And that's selfish. And I was
01:43:20
like, "There are things that are called inside thoughts, [laughter] >> and those are things that you shouldn't
01:43:25
say out loud cuz they're going to make you feel better to get them out. They're going to hurt the person you say them
01:43:30
to, which is very selfish." when it's like I don't even know that Jacob is like astute enough in this moment to be
01:43:36
hurt by that. I think he stopped listening at I don't want you to. >> Yeah. You know, like that. And that's
01:43:41
like you're leading him on. >> Yeah. >> It's [ __ ] up. And it's just [ __ ] up to say to someone like I don't want you
01:43:47
to stop obsessing over me, but it's only because I don't want you to go anywhere.
01:43:50
>> What the [ __ ] You don't have to be that honest, babe. No, you don't. >> That's not helping anybody. And we end
01:43:55
up like she tries to talk to Jake some more like after this first. Oh, first of all, Mike comes out of the bathroom
01:44:03
looking gray as hell and he >> sweating >> and he's sweat. He looks so sick and he's like,
01:44:10
>> "I have to go." >> So, I have to go home. That's all he says. And Jacob looks at him like he's
01:44:15
going to [ __ ] kill him. >> Jacob says, "You blank ass [ __ ] ass [ __ ] asshole."
01:44:20
>> Literally, he's like, "Do you have a problem?" And Jake's like, "Yeah, you're
01:44:25
my problem." And then he says like something about like maybe you need a hospital and maybe I need to put you
01:44:31
there. [laughter] And he's like what the [ __ ] And so Belle is like calm down. You're [ __ ] hot. And not like hot
01:44:36
like woo you're spicy. It's like no you're literally hot like you have a fever. >> Yeah.
01:44:40
>> And I love it cuz he walks away and Mike goes he's weird. [laughter] >> And I'd be like get away from me
01:44:46
influenza. But get away from me influence. [snorts and laughter] >> You got to go.
01:44:53
>> You were just talking about inside thoughts. I think that was one of those. But honestly, [laughter]
01:44:58
I don't have those. >> Get away from I'm preaching it, but I but I don't actually practice [laughter]
01:45:03
it. >> Do as I say, not as I do. >> Yeah. >> Um and this would seem I think they
01:45:08
should have done it where cuz it's seeming I know it's supposed to be that he's in the middle of transitioning. So
01:45:13
the the change the change is happening. [laughter] He's getting his manies right now. Um
01:45:19
his his werewolfies right now. Um and so it's supposed to be he's like uncontrollably getting angry and he's
01:45:26
hot and all that stuff. >> But I think they should have at least given Mike like some bit of antagonizing
01:45:31
there. Like said something that would not normally set someone off but sets him off like that cuz it comes out of
01:45:38
nowhere to such a degree that while you're watching it you're like why did he do that?
01:45:42
>> Yeah. Why so? Because when you're watching this for the first time or reading it, you don't know the
01:45:48
background yet, right? >> So, you don't know what that's all about. So, you're just sitting there
01:45:51
being like, is he why >> so mad? >> So, I think it just could have had a little bit of more even the smallest bit
01:45:58
of ant something that could even be taken for like um innocuous but is like has the tinge of antagonizing.
01:46:07
>> Um but that's just me being a dick. >> No, I get that. So, we see that like Bella tries to get a hold of Jacob a
01:46:13
bunch, can't get a hold of him. They're claiming he has mono, all that [ __ ] He's staying away. It's a long time. And
01:46:19
then she shows up in the [ __ ] pouring rain and he is just jorts. Just cut off jorts.
01:46:25
>> A tattoo. He's He's cut his hair. Thank god. >> Um Yeah. He cut his hair. He took the
01:46:31
wig off. Got a tattoo. He's got a tattoo >> that moves, by the way. >> Yeah. They go Yep. They go through a
01:46:37
whole thing with, you know, and he's saying he can't tell her what's going on and blah blah blah. And then he goes, "I
01:46:42
used to be >> tell you >> a good kid." >> And I said, "Stop." >> He said, "Okay."
01:46:50
>> And he's like, "Yeah, I can't tell you what's going on." And he just runs off
01:46:53
in the rain with his other shirtless Jorts crew. >> Jort squad. >> The Jort squad. [laughter]
01:46:59
>> I'm trying to think of another J. And just a a jumble of Jorts. >> Yes. just off the jumble. Yeah, the the
01:47:06
jumble of jorts off on the on the little periphery >> to have a Jort jamberee. >> So, we see her go up to the meadow again
01:47:13
where they used to like lay together. And can you please explain what happens there?
01:47:18
>> I need you guys >> cuz she has a vision like she remembers them laying in the meadow.
01:47:22
>> I need you guys to watch this scene. Even if you don't watch the whole movie again, watch this scene because as
01:47:26
they're like panning over Edward and Bella laying down, Bella doesn't have a foot. It's gone. And everybody like I
01:47:32
saw a couple people on Reddit being like, "No, it's just like like um her boot cut jeans." Nope.
01:47:37
>> Nope. Cuz you can see her other foot. >> Yeah. >> Her foot is missing. [laughter]
01:47:41
>> Her foot is >> her foot is gone. >> It is. It's gone. >> It's Maybe that's supposed to tell you
01:47:47
it's a memory. >> To believe that her boot cut jeans consumed her foot. >> But [laughter] you're wrong.
01:47:54
>> They didn't. >> You're wrong. >> They just digitally took her foot out by accident.
01:47:58
>> Yep. And didn't put it back in. Uh, it's pretty funny. Um, but when she goes up
01:48:03
to this meadow, it's no longer that lush meadow. It's all like burned and dead. Um, and Laurent shows up
01:48:10
>> and he's hungry. >> He look and he looks great. >> He does. >> Laurent's gorgeous as far as I'm
01:48:15
concerned. >> Abs for days. >> It is. And just he's beautiful. >> He's getting his protein in there.
01:48:19
>> He is protein. [laughter] You're getting protein in there. >> Protein in there.
01:48:24
>> Uh, a lot of iron. And he he tells her that basically Victoria is eye for and
01:48:29
eyeing her. Edward killed her mate so she needs to kill Edward's mate and that's you buddy. And then he's like
01:48:34
good luck. >> He's like are I went to the Collins house, didn't see him there. Do they
01:48:38
visit often or like weird that they left you here? And Edward shows up to tell her like lie. At one point he says
01:48:45
threaten him. And I was like that's I would have been like timeout. What do I say?
01:48:50
>> What threat? You have to be specific to me. you need to cuz I said earlier I was
01:48:53
like my immediate thought for a threat would be like I'll spit in your eye and kick you in the shin
01:48:57
>> and that's not going to help anybody. So like you need to tell me what threat you
01:49:00
want me to use but she apparently knows. >> I don't even know what you would say.
01:49:04
>> I think she says like Edward will never let that happen. He'll come back for me.
01:49:08
>> But that's not cuz he's like you wouldn't have left you in the first place. >> Yeah. He's like pretty shitty that he
01:49:13
left you here. And I'm like yeah it is pretty shitty huh. I'd be like you know what? Why don't we sit down and actually
01:49:18
we can talk about it because there's a lot of lore to this. She's like, "I would actually love to talk about this."
01:49:22
>> There was a search party, Lauron. >> Um, I don't know if you know this, but I
01:49:25
sat in a chair for four months. Yeah. With >> Do you know Licky Lee? Whatever possibility. All right.
01:49:31
>> Do you know that there's a possibility? >> I missed four months of school. >> It's a possibility.
01:49:36
>> Trick-or-treaters were in my sideyard. >> Well, and then he's like, "You know
01:49:39
what? I'm really hungry, though. Victoria's probably going to be annoyed at me for eating you, but I think I'm
01:49:43
going to >> and it'll be better >> and it's going to be fine. >> Like, I'll make it painless."
01:49:47
>> And she literally stands there and is going to allow him to. And she's like, "I love you. I love you, Edward." And I
01:49:51
was like, "Oh, [ __ ] a." >> She wants that to be her last words. I said, "Really?"
01:49:55
>> Yeah. >> He left you. >> He left you in the woods alone. >> Come on. >> Grow up.
01:50:00
>> But there's a wolf there. I think it's Sam at first. >> Yeah. He like leads the pack. I think
01:50:07
there I think. Yeah, they're all there, I think. >> But, uh, they all attack Laurent. And,
01:50:11
uh, that's a that's a series wrap all around. >> Yeah. So, she goes and tells Charlie and
01:50:17
Harry and they go out hunting. But, this is a big deal because when she tells uh
01:50:22
Charlie and Harry, for some reason, I was going to like morph their names together.
01:50:27
>> There's no phone on the wall in the cupboards where there is a phone later. >> Oops. So, like I maybe they got a
01:50:34
landline within this time frame really quickly. >> But just so you know that. >> Yeah. You just never know. But she she
01:50:40
does she goes back down and like they're at the at Jake's house at one point. And
01:50:45
that's when she discovers that he's a werewolf. Like they show her because I think she like aggravates is it Embry or
01:50:52
one of the >> Yeah, she one of them actually she goes there in the f Oh, I think she tries to
01:50:58
call him or something. Yeah. Yeah. >> Something happens where she ends up being like she pisses one of them off
01:51:04
and they phase. >> Yeah. >> And she runs away from him and when she's running Jake runs out of the house
01:51:09
and she's like run Jake run Jake run Jake run. It's the way she says it is so funny.
01:51:15
>> She says it like his name is Jake Run >> and they, you know, they fight all that
01:51:18
and then they're walking on the beach and he's explaining things to her cuz now she's seen it.
01:51:22
>> We missed a part. So Jacob does come to her room at one point after this whole
01:51:27
like Laurent situation. He like shows up cuz remember he parkour up to her room.
01:51:31
>> Oh my god, we missed. I think it would have been so funny if he just went. If you've seen the office episode where
01:51:38
they all parkour and they just keep yelling parkour while like hitting things, that's what I think of. And in
01:51:44
this exchange between the two of them, he's saying, "I can't tell you, >> but like think
01:51:50
about when we were walking on the beach when you came to La Push." And she was like, and he was like, "Do you remember
01:51:55
what I told you?" And she goes, "About the cold ones." And he goes, "I guess I understand why that's the only part you
01:52:00
remember." And I said, "You narcissistic [ __ ] He told you about wolves. You only heard the part that had
01:52:08
anything to do with you or something you were interested in. When he told you the
01:52:12
lore of his people whose land you are currently standing on at La Push, >> you checked out.
01:52:19
>> What the [ __ ] She really is so narcissistic. >> She's got narcissistic tendencies.
01:52:23
>> It's like wild. She just does not hear. If it has to do with anyone else's [ __ ]
01:52:28
>> she doesn't care. >> She does not give a [ __ ] >> She doesn't care. Also, um this is when
01:52:32
he like looks at her scar and it has moved. >> It has >> because in the first movie it's like on
01:52:38
the side of her arm. So, it's like on the top and the bottom, but here it's just on like the inside of her arm.
01:52:43
>> Yeah. >> And also, I'm like you don't get questions about that more often. >> That's what I'm wondering.
01:52:49
>> Like that's the only person who flips your arm around. >> Bite scar. >> It's It looks like my whole night guard
01:52:54
imprinted on my arm. >> It's massive. [laughter] >> It is huge. [snorts] So, it's after this discussion in
01:53:03
Bella's bedroom where she's like, "Oh, yeah. I remember stuff that that appealed to me, but I completely ignored
01:53:11
the lore of your people." >> Yeah. >> I love when Jacob's like, "All right, I'm going to go."
01:53:18
>> He's like, "You know what? [ __ ] it. >> I'm going to parkour the [ __ ] out of
01:53:20
here." >> Yeah. He goes parkour and he leaves. So then that's when we get the scene of
01:53:25
her, you know, showing up and that's when she like sees that they are werewolves because in
01:53:32
>> in the room he's like, "I wish I could tell you. I literally can't. I wish you
01:53:36
knew how tightly I'm bound to this." And that's when he says like, "I did say it
01:53:40
a little bit on the bush." On the beach. And she's like, "Yeah, I didn't hear that." On the bush.
01:53:44
>> On the bush. >> On the bush. >> I was I was thinking la push and beach at the same time.
01:53:48
>> I get that. But uh this is when she sees it because she slaps one of them. >> Yeah. Which is rude, which is like very
01:53:55
violent and >> Yeah. You can't just go around people. >> Um but she she slapped him and he got
01:54:00
real mad cuz he's a wolf now. And so he was like and then he turns into a wolf. >> Yeah.
01:54:06
>> And that's when she does the whole run Jake run Jake run Jake run. >> It's the way she said. I'm telling you.
01:54:13
Listen to it again. It'll it'll hit you different. >> No, it's funny. Um, >> what are the [ __ ] odds that your
01:54:19
first boyfriend in high school, like to our knowledge, is a vampire? >> Yeah. >> And then the next boy that you hang out
01:54:25
with is a werewolf. What are the [ __ ] odds? >> What are the o how does someone hit the
01:54:29
jackpot like that is what I want to know. I just got a dumb human. >> Do I Wow, I know. Yeah, I just got a
01:54:37
human. You just called them out. I mean, like dumb as in like humans are dumb. He
01:54:41
was pretty dumb. He was not great either. Yeah, [laughter] I was I was like, I know your first high school
01:54:45
boyfriend. He was pretty dumb. Um, mine, too. Mine, too. >> I think most of us were.
01:54:50
>> Yeah. I don't even know where I was going with that. I just like, what are the odds?
01:54:53
>> Yeah, that's the thing. I My daughters all like they can't watch Twilight yet.
01:54:59
>> They never talked about it, but we will for a cautionary tale at some point. And
01:55:02
I feel like it is like a it's it's like we we joke about it, but it's like it's a right of passage. I feel like you got
01:55:08
to but you just got to preface it with like this is wild. >> This is toxic. Um, but for the fun like
01:55:14
romance and vampire and werewolf and of it all. But I was discussing it with John last night. I was mentioning
01:55:21
something about New Moon and he and the girls were like, "What is that?" And I was like, "Oh, remember I like me."
01:55:27
Because I've told them like, "Oh, there's this movie Twilight. It's a book. Someday you'll read it. It's in
01:55:31
the zeitgeist. >> It's there." And so they were like, "Oh, like when can we watch that?" And I was
01:55:35
like, "Not for a while." >> But I was like, "Oh, there's this really cool scene with Victoria and the
01:55:40
werewolf." And I was talking about the the one that's coming up and it's like when He hearing Damage by Tom York is
01:55:46
playing. >> It's such a good scene >> and they wanted they were like can we watch the scene and I was like so I
01:55:50
watched the scene I was like give me a second. >> It's not scary really. >> No it's not scary at all but I was like
01:55:54
this is a cool scene. So I showed it to them and all three of them were like when can we watch them? And I was like I
01:55:59
know I just gave you like and I was like the whole movie isn't like that but it does have these vibes.
01:56:04
>> Honestly I think you said it when we were watching it. That's the best scene in the entire and it's coming up because
01:56:10
>> it's coming up. >> It's coming up because it right before that happens like she finds out that
01:56:16
Jake's a werewolf. He changes in front of her. She's like, "Holy shit." He's like this beautiful like amber colored
01:56:22
werewolf. >> Where is the color of his werewolf coat? >> Exactly. And she sings that.
01:56:26
>> Yeah, she does. You miss that part. It's only in the director's cut >> and it's so quick you'll miss it. Uh you
01:56:31
have to like you have to pause between the the different film slides to get it. It's actually not even in the director's
01:56:36
cut. It's only in special exclusive cuts that only few few people know. >> Yeah, it's only in the cut that I have.
01:56:42
>> Well, I have it too, actually. >> No, only I do. >> Well, I I knew about it first. So,
01:56:47
[laughter and gasps] >> but they go for a walk to discuss his his new found werewolfness.
01:56:53
>> And Bella says to him, "Can't you find a way to just stop?" And then she says, "It's
01:57:01
wrong." Yeah, >> I'm sorry. >> This should be the moment where Jake goes, you know what?
01:57:09
>> Not worth it. >> Not worth it. That's like because what the [ __ ] is Let me get this straight.
01:57:15
And he literally says he's like, "Oh, I'm not the right kind of monster for you. You jackass." [laughter]
01:57:20
>> That is That is such a great jackass moment. >> Jackass. Like, okay. No, not for
01:57:27
nothing, baby. baby. >> But Edward was a [ __ ] human who got bit by a vampire and turned into a
01:57:33
vampire. He's not genetically predispositioned to be a vampire. He had he apparently didn't have a choice
01:57:39
because Carle was saving him and like kind of took that choice away from him, right?
01:57:43
>> But like it's not in his genetic code to be a vampire. It's not through generations that he became one.
01:57:50
>> The Quillute tribe in this instance, the whole thing is you're directly tied to
01:57:55
that bloodline. happen. >> You don't have a choice. It's happening. >> You come across a vampire, boom,
01:58:01
>> and it's like to say to someone where this is literally in their blood, >> that's wrong
01:58:07
>> and not a choice. I'm like, that's [ __ ] that sounds homophobic as [ __ ] >> It's racist.
01:58:12
>> Like to sit there and be like, >> it's actually it's speciesist. >> She's saying it's a choice.
01:58:16
>> Yeah. No, she is. >> And then it's wrong. >> She would she would love right now.
01:58:20
>> She would love right now. would she would like I was like that is the most f it's weird that they kept that in there
01:58:26
because I was like she became diabolically unlikable in that moment like cuz poor Jake is sitting there
01:58:34
can't do anything >> and also this is brand new for him too like he's heard these legends and he
01:58:40
didn't know that it was going to happen to him exactly he's still getting used to it
01:58:44
>> wrong and like one of the first people that ever gets to see this insane like
01:58:50
just wild thing about you. That's their reaction. >> You [ __ ] >> It's wrong. [snorts]
01:58:55
>> You [ __ ] >> Can't you just find a way to Is it Is it a phase? >> No. >> That's essentially what she's saying to
01:59:01
him. And I was like, you [ __ ] >> Yeah, >> it pissed me off so much. I was like,
01:59:06
what? That's the crazy thing, too. >> You're in love with a vampire. >> It's wrong. She's lit. And also like she
01:59:11
barely asked Edward any questions. >> No, he said he was a vampire and she was like, "Let's run through those trees,
01:59:15
bitch." >> Not only that, he literally said, "This is the skin of the Bella and she said he
01:59:21
has told her I want to kill you. >> Yeah, >> but I won't. But I want to kill you at
01:59:27
all times. >> Told her I have I am a killer. >> And she's like, "It's okay, baby." And
01:59:33
then Jacob's like, "Hey, I'm a fluffy dog and I'm protecting people right now." And she's like, "That's really
01:59:38
wrong. Can't you stop?" >> Gross. >> And then she's like, "They don't hurt anyone."
01:59:42
>> And I'm like, >> he's like, "Neither do we." >> And also >> And also they do hurt people.
01:59:45
>> They made a choice to not hurt anyone. >> Yeah. But they didn't go through their
01:59:49
entire lives doing that. >> Facts. >> Also, I'm sorry, babe. They haven't hurt anyone. Why don't you pull Jasper aside?
01:59:56
Once you pull Jasper aside, >> have him look you in the eye. Oh, wait. He can't. He'll eat you first. If you
02:00:02
can get him aside, >> ask him. >> At least you can get >> Ask him if he's hurt anyone.
02:00:06
>> At least you could get a paper cut in front of Jake >> and he would probably help you out.
02:00:10
>> What a [ __ ] up. >> I was like, Jacob to still be into this after this conversation. [laughter]
02:00:16
I know. It's >> like wild. >> It's like the the thing we tell the kids that we should not tell him is like,
02:00:21
"Oh, she's mean to you. She likes >> because she likes you." Like, I feel like he thinks that. That's not the
02:00:25
case. >> No. >> So, that's [ __ ] up. And even he's like, "Wow, you're [ __ ] up for saying
02:00:30
that." And we do get a scene where it's Bella deciding what she has to do. She knows what she has to do, which in her
02:00:38
mind is jump off that cliff that all those >> Yeah. all the other werewolves were
02:00:42
jumping off because it's going to be a rush and she's gonna get to see Edward again. And she said that's the only way,
02:00:47
which I was like, I feel like you've seen him enough up to this point that you could do about a thousand other
02:00:52
things to see him. >> Yeah. >> That wouldn't include jumping off a 4,000 ft tall cliff
02:00:57
>> in all Here's my biggest Here's my biggest issue. It's not even the 4,000t tall cliff. Why does she jump in all of
02:01:04
her clothing? >> Mhm. >> Why does she li She jumps in with her Converse on. >> Yeah. Why?
02:01:12
Why do that? >> Why not? >> Why jump in with your little jacket that you always Why?
02:01:18
>> Oh, no. She took the jacket off. >> Did she take her jacket off? Did she take her Converse off or did she jump
02:01:21
in? >> I don't think she did. I think she took her She jumped in Converse. >> I can't I can't
02:01:27
>> I don't I just don't get why. Like you watched werewolves, which are supernatural beings
02:01:36
with supernatural healing abilities >> who run hot >> who run hot jump off of that and
02:01:41
survive. And you said I probably can too. >> Yeah, >> it'll probably be the same for me.
02:01:46
>> Well, and also like >> did she think that? Cuz you've been hallucinating. There's been a lot of
02:01:52
stuff happening right now that I just don't think you're in your your complete clear mind right now to be making smart
02:02:00
decisions for yourself when you think you're seeing Edward. >> Yeah. >> Whenever you do something dumb.
02:02:05
>> Yep. >> And that the it so she's sitting there like basically writing an email to
02:02:12
Alice, which Have we mentioned the emails? >> I don't remember. >> I don't know if we've mentioned the
02:02:17
emails. If we haven't, I'm sorry if we have. just when there was a possibility during that 4mon period, she and during
02:02:25
this entire time that Edward's been away, she is sending an email a day, sometimes two emails a day at the most
02:02:31
crazy times of night, like 3:00 in the morning, 2:00 in the morning. I paused. >> Yeah,
02:02:36
>> I counted 13 when I counted and that was just in like a month or two. >> And they're all being returned.
02:02:43
>> Yeah. So, they're not even making it to >> You know, you know the mail or demon?
02:02:46
>> The mail or demon? Yeah. >> Yeah. That guy. Demon or demon? >> I always call it the demon.
02:02:50
>> It might be the demon. >> I don't know. Whatever it is, >> I'm like when that you don't continue to
02:02:53
send. >> No, >> you don't make the demon demon work overtime. >> Yeah. >> But so she writes her an email.
02:02:59
>> It's insane. So she's she's in the middle of writing her an email uh Alice saying that this is what she has to do.
02:03:06
She knows this is what she has to do. >> Yep. >> And we hear that voice over and her
02:03:11
getting ready to go to the cliff. And we also get this really cool like mashup of
02:03:18
Victoria as Charlie and Harry Clearwater and all the guys are looking for this bear
02:03:23
>> quote unquote which has now been told they've been told it's a wolf >> by Bella
02:03:29
>> because when she when she sees it after like it attacks Luron she lets them know
02:03:34
>> they're wolves. >> Um they're huge. >> It is not a bear. Uh and there so they're in the woods like searching for
02:03:40
him. They have guns. They're doing the whole search party and we see Victoria stalking them in the tree. She's so
02:03:45
[ __ ] cool in this. Also, she somehow found hair dye to make that hair really red in this one.
02:03:50
>> Super vibrant. >> Um, very vibrant. Love it. It's wonderful. >> But it's just funny that it changed
02:03:54
between when she's been like living in the woods. [laughter] But like, okay. I mean, she it's berries.
02:03:58
>> She finds time to like get tone, you know? >> Um, just a what is it? A gloss and
02:04:03
>> little quick gloss, you know? >> Bleach and tone. >> There you go. And we see Harry
02:04:08
Clearwater like covering up wolf tracks as they go because like that's his people.
02:04:13
>> And so Victoria at one point grabs Harry Clearwater before he can like shoot her
02:04:22
and lifts him up in the air and he's like petrified. And then before she can do anything, a wolf comes and just like
02:04:32
t-bones her >> and so Harry falls to the ground. He's all stressed out. He ends up having a
02:04:36
heart attack. >> It's the saddest death because Harry Clearwater is the most adorable man and
02:04:41
I love him. I would lay down my life for Harry. >> Sad. And what happens in the book is you
02:04:47
we've mentioned Leah Clearwater >> and her plight which we will get to. I think she has many
02:04:52
>> I think the next one maybe the one after that. It's either Eclipse or the first
02:04:56
Breaking Dawn. Um but we get to her plight. One other thing that Stephanie Meyer added onto her plate is that in
02:05:03
the book, Harry Clearwater dies from a heart attack because Aaliyah transforms into a wolf in front of him for the
02:05:08
first time and he has a heart attack from it. So, she kills her [laughter] essentially.
02:05:13
>> It's like, damn, you really did her >> kills her dad and then she has to listen
02:05:16
to her loved one imprint on her cousin. >> Yeah. Not great. >> Rock on. >> Not great. Uh, but so so Harry has a
02:05:23
heart attack and this is when Tom York's hearing damage plays over it. Perfect song for this. Perfectly shot. There's a
02:05:32
scene of like Victoria and I think it's Jacob, >> I'm pretty sure, as a wolf. >> Oh, I think you're right.
02:05:37
>> They are like on opposite sides of a clearing and they do this like faceoff thing and then they just like lunge at
02:05:43
each other and she does these cool like slow motion flips in the air and [ __ ] >> And Tom, what is it? Tom York.
02:05:49
>> Yeah. >> He has such a cool voice. >> He does. And the the song is just perfect. It gives you chills.
02:05:54
>> It's such a vibe. and she's running away from the whole pack of wolves and it's
02:05:57
like slow motion and I can see it in my head right now. It's a really and they do these overhead shots and everything's
02:06:03
really lush and green. And it's like this this scene. I thought I said if the whole movie was like this,
02:06:10
>> it would be even better cuz it's like >> I know the romance is part of it, >> but I if we could tone down some of the
02:06:16
melodramatics and get a little more of like vampires versus wolves, which we get later, I think
02:06:22
>> like that becomes more of a thing. We see like these battles and everything. It's really fun.
02:06:26
>> It really is. >> So, I really love this. So, but uh she gets away by jumping off the cliff,
02:06:33
>> right? And it's like she like swan dives out and it's gorgeous. >> And is it that they can't go in the
02:06:38
water because it's like where the tree I think it's they chase her to like where
02:06:41
the treaty is. >> The treaty is maybe. Yeah. Cuz she jumps right into the water. She like swan
02:06:46
dives and Jacob is like right after her and he's has a wolf and he stops on the cliff and is like
02:06:52
>> um so she jumps in there and then we see Bella get to the top of the cliff. She
02:06:57
jumps in. >> As she jumps in, >> worst timing. We see we see um Edward tell her not to. She's like, "This is
02:07:05
the only way that I can see you." And he's like, "Please don't." >> She jumps in anyways.
02:07:10
>> She like gets like beat up by some waves cuz it's like >> clear like clean crystal water like
02:07:18
>> cuz when she jumps in it's good, but then she literally gets [ __ ] smacked in the face with Yeah. barrel roll.
02:07:24
>> Like literally like slams into a rock. Like slams her head into a rock course.
02:07:28
She's just floating underwater, which I guess they weighted her down to get that
02:07:31
shot. Oh, like I think they put weights in her pockets so that she could float slow like that.
02:07:37
>> And uh you see you see the vision of Edward like opposite her so their heads are next to each other
02:07:43
>> when he dissipates >> cuz she gets pulled out of the water and she like you can arm kind of flails
02:07:51
>> when she gets barrel rolled. Once she like kind of gets her bearings, she sees
02:07:55
Victoria swimming to towards her underwater. The most beautiful fish there ever was.
02:07:59
>> Literally scariest and most beautiful fish. That's when she backs up and hits
02:08:03
her head into the rock. Here's my thing with this. This is an issue. She can run
02:08:08
so fast. She can't swim just as fast. I mean, maybe it has something to do with the water.
02:08:13
>> They didn't tell me. >> Is it in the illustrated guide? And also she might have just been swimming up on
02:08:19
her slow for for >> for the fear factor and she didn't know that somebody was gonna pull her out
02:08:24
>> maybe >> because she was backing into the rock. She was going to be out cold so she had
02:08:27
all the time in the world >> to get to her >> still. >> But when she when she gets pulled out
02:08:32
her hand kind of like floats to the side and then Edward just like dissipates. >> Edward Vincent Van goes right out of
02:08:38
there. >> It does. It's like Salvador Dolly painting. It just like melts. Uh but yeah, so she gets it's Jacob who
02:08:45
pulls her out and gives her CPR. She goes full crosseyed again. >> She also swallows the water instead of
02:08:52
spitting it out, which I was like in that case like I know dry drowning is weird but like she might dry drown
02:08:57
later. >> Well, and also I was just like just spit it out. I think they put that water in
02:09:00
your mouth so you could spit it out for effect, not swallow it. >> Bellisan would swallow the water she was
02:09:05
drowning [laughter] on though. But she goes crosseyed again. And now I'm like, every time she is near death, she goes
02:09:11
crossey. >> She does such an interesting crossey, too, because it's not both eyes, it's
02:09:15
one of her eyes that crosses. It's like a >> I got to think about it. Hold on. This
02:09:19
is not a visual podcast, so it doesn't matter. But I really wanted to give it a shot.
02:09:22
>> Oh, and when Bella jumps off that cliff, by the way, she barely jumps out. >> Oh, that is another piss. She just steps
02:09:30
off. >> You're going to die in all the rocks underneath there. >> I was like, what the [ __ ] [snorts] No.
02:09:35
Jacob gets her home and when they pull up they see Carlo's car and she's like, "Holy shit." And he says like, "I can
02:09:44
smell them in there." And she's like, she's like, "I got to go in there." And Jacob's begging her not to. And saying
02:09:50
like, "I can't protect you." And all this. And I think it's at this point that she literally she just tells him
02:09:58
like, >> "I don't care. I'll be with Edward doing this." like she's being so clear to him
02:10:07
and he just unfortunately it's horrible but she has been from the start like when they were sitting on the was it
02:10:14
when they were sitting in the movie theater and she was like >> yeah like I don't want you to go away.
02:10:18
>> Yeah it's >> that's the thing it's like there's there's a lot of mixed vibes happening
02:10:22
here I feel and Jacob's young so [snorts] I feel like it's like >> uh but she goes in there and it's Alice
02:10:29
who's there and Alice is all upset. She says she saw a vision of of um Bella jumping off the cliff that she was
02:10:36
trying to kill herself. Like she was like, "What the fuck?" And they hug and you know, it's a whole reunion
02:10:41
>> and she's like, "Why the [ __ ] does it smell like what dog in your house?" >> Yeah. And she's like And Jacob shows up
02:10:46
and is like, "I had to make sure you were okay." And Alice and Jacob have this like really tense standoff. And she
02:10:54
at one point they get like into it for a second and it it's like as soon as Jacob
02:11:01
gets upset he gets very it's he he's not scary. >> No. >> Which which is like not his fault. He's
02:11:10
just like >> but also he just like I feel like Taylor Lner who plays Jacob >> is has such a kind face. You know what I
02:11:20
mean? like and he has a kind way about him that just like could not make me scared of him.
02:11:26
>> Yeah. >> And so when he say he says, "Don't get me upset. Things are going to get very
02:11:31
ugly." And I was like, "No, they won't. [laughter] >> They could never. They can't."
02:11:36
>> I think if I was Alice, I'd be like, "Boop." Like [laughter] she basically does. She's like, "Yeah, [ __ ] off."
02:11:42
>> She kind of does. Like I was like, >> doesn't she say like, "We can we can figure this out when you put the dog
02:11:47
out." >> Yeah. She cuz she's like, "Where are you going, Alice?" And she's like, "I'm
02:11:49
going to let you take the dog out." And I was like, "Oh, girl, burn. >> That's a lead."
02:11:54
>> Uh, but when he said things are going to get very ugly, I said, "Babe, never.
02:11:58
They could never with you. They could never get ugly with you." >> They're not. >> It's [laughter]
02:12:04
It's just wild. It's next level. >> Um, so they end up, you know, Jacob and Bella
02:12:10
are talking. So, I think the phone rings. She goes in the kitchen. The phone rings. They Jacob and Bella have a
02:12:16
moment where they almost kiss. >> Yeah. Very close. >> Yeah. And then the phone rings
02:12:20
>> and he answers it. >> He's not pleased. He says Swan Res. >> You don't need to answer my telephone.
02:12:24
>> She wasn't going to answer that. >> But my telephone that is brand new. >> And you can tell he's a little pissed
02:12:28
when he answers it and he says she's not he's not here. >> He's planning a funeral
02:12:32
>> and he says he's planning a funeral and hangs up the phone. Now what he meant
02:12:35
there obviously this person asked for Charlie. >> Mhm. >> Charlie is planning a funeral for Harry
02:12:42
Clearwater. So that is a thing. >> Jacob, apparently this is like widely argued.
02:12:47
>> Yeah. Whether he intended to do this or not, >> he definitely did. In my opinion,
02:12:52
Stephanie Meyer says no. Here's the thing. I mean, I would trust her cuz she wrote it.
02:12:56
>> I know. I know. But >> but but here's here's my reason why I do believe this.
02:13:02
He does not know that the Cullens had any idea of Bella [snorts and clears throat] jumping off
02:13:11
that cliff to try to like kill herself. He doesn't know that. >> That's true. He He wasn't like Alice
02:13:17
didn't say I'm here because she tried to kill herself. Like he doesn't know that.
02:13:21
>> That's true. >> So him saying that wouldn't make sense. Especially because >> Oh, actually when you put it that way,
02:13:26
that's a good point. >> It's Edward on the phone and he's asking for Charlie as well. So I think he's
02:13:30
more looking at it like he's trying to get to her through Charlie. [ __ ] you. Charlie's planning a funeral. Like you
02:13:36
piece of [ __ ] Like your little love story doesn't matter. Somebody died. Cuz that's also Jacob's family member.
02:13:41
>> Yeah. >> So like Harry Clear. That's a good I never even thought of that point. I
02:13:45
think he doesn't know. >> It makes sense that he would want to take it that way and that if he did have
02:13:50
all the information, >> sure, maybe he would have done that and I could absolutely see that. But he
02:13:56
didn't have all that information. So, it doesn't really make sense that he would
02:13:59
have said it that way. I think he was more annoyed that he felt Edward was trying to get to Bella through Charlie.
02:14:05
Yep. Yep. >> Like trying to So, he's like, "Fuck you." He's planning a funeral. >> Yeah.
02:14:08
>> Yeah. So, that does happen. We see on the other end, >> it's just the worst possible thing he
02:14:13
could have said. >> It is cuz Bella probably saw it as like even though she knows he doesn't have
02:14:18
all the information, she's still pissed. Why didn't you hand me the phone? That was Edward,
02:14:21
>> right? >> And we see Edward, he literally crushes his phone in his hand and he's in a
02:14:26
dingy apartment. He looks a hot mess. Yeah, he's he's not doing well, >> which also I'm like, what's going on?
02:14:33
Where was everybody? That's the thing. I don't think that I don't remember in the
02:14:38
book because I just watched the movie. I read the book forever ago, but I'm like,
02:14:42
do they all go to their separate places? But then I don't I don't know because somehow I think he's with Rosalie.
02:14:50
>> Yeah, because Rosalie or at least is in contact with them. >> I mean, which he's not via cell phone
02:14:56
according to Google. >> Google, you see him. He's in this apartment. He's looking out his window.
02:15:03
It's at night. You can see the Christ the Redeemer statue in the background. Okay. So when I saw that I said that's
02:15:09
Brazil, that's Rio di Janeiro. Okay. Like I or what I believed it was. >> Apparently that's where he was. He
02:15:16
traveled alone and he ended up there. >> Wait, I think the rest of them went from
02:15:20
New York. >> To New York. >> Yeah. So apparently this >> he went to Brazil and they went to New
02:15:26
York. >> Yeah. They did not go together. >> Interesting. I think I actually now I'm
02:15:31
remembering from the book something about Brazil. >> Yeah. And it makes sense because you see
02:15:36
that stat that's a famous statue out the window. So I remember seeing it and being like, "Wait a minute."
02:15:40
>> Oh, so he has to fly to Italy. >> Yeah. >> Huh. It's actually so funny because this
02:15:47
I remember being like there it makes no sense that they got to him before >> he like before like in in perfect time.
02:15:56
It does make sense because if he's in Brazil and he's flying to Italy, a direct flight is 11 to 13 hours. And
02:16:02
then from Washington to Italy is 8 and a half, nine and a half hours. See, that makes sense.
02:16:07
>> So, it makes sense now. >> That makes a lot more sense because I was there was so many cuz I knew he
02:16:12
wasn't in Italy because I was like that statue, but I was like >> for some reason and it it has nothing to
02:16:18
do with the background. For some reason, I had it in my head. He was in Tokyo. >> Who know? Yeah. I don't know. But I
02:16:25
guess the rest of them according to Google, >> they're in New York. >> They're in New York. and Carlile like
02:16:30
got like started like I guess he like went like taught classes at Cornell for a little while.
02:16:35
>> Okay. >> Um but how does Rosalie get in touch with Edward then? >> Must have called him before he talked to
02:16:42
Cuz what did she say Rosalie said? >> So I think it's that Rosalie said that cuz I'm assuming
02:16:50
>> Rosalie told him about the vision and that's why he calls. Okay. That's why he
02:16:54
calls to like really check. And when he heard he's planning a funeral, he was like, "Holy [ __ ] it really happened."
02:16:59
>> There we go. Wow. >> And he was like, "I got to go." >> I don't know why my brain just like
02:17:02
>> No, it is. It's a little confusing because telephone >> and in the book in the movie I don't
02:17:08
think they're clear about where the rest of the >> in the movie they're not >> the family went because in the movie I
02:17:13
think he mentions Charlie says something about like I think it's Charlie who says
02:17:18
it that like um Carile got a job >> in LA or something it's either in the movie or the book I can't remember now.
02:17:25
>> Okay. I think it might be in the book. >> I think that's the book. >> In the book I think they say like he got
02:17:29
a job in LA and he just had to take it. So they just up and left. and left. >> So, yeah. So, it's very interesting.
02:17:37
There's a lot of moving pieces which can be a little little clunky to understand,
02:17:42
but we we figured it out. >> Um, so he >> he crushes his phone. Um, and we see like them traveling, you know, now and
02:17:53
Jacob tries to like begs Bella not to go >> because Alice says he's going to show
02:17:58
himself to the volter now that he thinks you're dead. >> Yeah. He's going to show up to because
02:18:02
that was his plan. Remember before when he thought Bella was dead, he told her his plan.
02:18:06
>> And now that he has no cell phone, there's no way to tell him, which is why we don't overreact and crush our cell
02:18:10
phones into a million pieces. >> Exactly. You need to keep your cell phone on you. So, or at least have an
02:18:15
Apple Watch, something. Um, but yeah, so they're on their way. Jacob tries to stop her and she's like, I'm leaving.
02:18:22
And he's really sad and >> it's sad. >> It's upsetting. >> Uh, but they go they go to Italy. Um,
02:18:27
Alice's driving outfit. Queen [ __ ] She looks the driving gloves stunning. She looks wonderful. St. Is it
02:18:37
Ashley Green? >> Yeah, >> she is stupid pretty like that. That this this one shot of her. She has like the head
02:18:45
wrap on the sunglasses >> and she's got the driving gloves. >> I die. >> Hi. >> I die. I will. I want to drive like
02:18:53
that. >> Also, I don't know. I think we mentioned it in the first one, but in I can't
02:18:58
remember if we did or not. Um, apparently Stephanie Meyer's brothers are like big car heads, so they helped
02:19:03
her decide like what cars were going to be in the in the movie and in the books.
02:19:07
>> Yeah. Which is I think that's cute. >> That makes sense. And um, so she's got
02:19:12
to go, they get to Voltera, there's a festival going on, everybody's in red cloaks and all that [ __ ] Um, and he's
02:19:19
play he he went to the Viri to say like, I want to die. But Arrow is like, "Nah,
02:19:24
dude. Your gift is like a little too special. I can't kill you. Sorry about it. >> I could kill my own sister, but not
02:19:29
you." >> Arrow's the best. Cuz he's just like, >> "Oops, sorry. [laughter] Sorry to You
02:19:35
could join us, though. We would love that. Like, let's, you know, we can't kill you, but be one of us."
02:19:41
>> And he's like, "No, thank you." And so, he just decides that he's going to walk
02:19:44
out into the festival and show himself to everyone, and then the Vuri will have no choice. And this festival is like all
02:19:50
about the day that like they killed the last vampire or something like that. So it's like this is the big thing.
02:19:54
>> This is not good. >> Um so she gets to him with like seconds to spare. He's about to walk out of
02:19:59
where the Vuri is. >> He starts to sparkle shirtless. >> That's the thing. I love that his plan
02:20:04
is just to sparkle for the people. >> Yeah. >> Which anybody I feel like anybody would
02:20:09
look at that and be like, "Oh my god, look at that guy with that body glitter. Where'd you get that?"
02:20:14
>> It's so sparkly. >> That would be some crazy eye. [snorts and laughter] >> I'd be like, "Who's the holographic?"
02:20:18
holographic over there. >> I feel like that's pretty sick. I would not be like, "Whoa, vampire
02:20:22
>> a creature of the night over there." >> But I mean, maybe these people know because they're they're wellvered in.
02:20:27
>> They're in Valera after all. >> She runs right through the fountain. She didn't have to do that. [snorts]
02:20:32
>> Go around it. >> I don't think >> water slows you down. >> Um or you could have just ran along the
02:20:36
edge cuz like Yeah, water slows you down. I just It bothered me. >> That's silly.
02:20:39
>> Um but she gets to him right in the last second. She jumps on him. He says, "Heaven," which I was like, "That's
02:20:46
really sweet." I know >> it is sweet. Like they they like he thinks he's in heaven.
02:20:50
>> I know. >> And I was like that's real sweet. >> It is >> that moment I was like oh okay
02:20:56
>> back to your love. Let's go. They they pull you in every He loves her so much.
02:21:01
>> He does. Even though he left her in the middle of the fort. >> Forget about that.
02:21:05
>> But that happened. A little girl did see him while he was sparkling now. And she
02:21:09
was like trying to She was like tugging on her parents being like, "Look at this
02:21:11
[ __ ] sparkly [laughter] [ __ ] over there." Yep. Um, but they get in there. Felix and I think Dimmitri, which
02:21:18
are like two of the guards, come over and are like, "Hey, Arrow wants to see you." And he's like, "No, I don't need
02:21:23
them anymore. Like, I'm not looking to kill myself anymore." >> He's like, "Yeah, that's not what he
02:21:27
wants." >> Yeah, he still wants to see you. And then Jane appears and she's like, he
02:21:31
wants to know why it's taking so long. And I was like, [ __ ] it's been it literally took a second, but okay.
02:21:37
>> She has this stare. Dakota Fanning does such a good job of this like deadeyed
02:21:42
like I'll [ __ ] kill you stare. >> Yeah. >> I was like damn. [snorts] >> But they go in they they see like that
02:21:48
there's a secretary there that's a human. And this is when they go in and Belle is like
02:21:53
>> oh does she want to become and one of I think it's like Dimmitri or Felix is like so she will become and then that's
02:22:00
when Jane says or she'll be dessert. And they go in there. We see, you know, we see Marcus just [ __ ] himself to the
02:22:08
side there. He's >> so tortured. >> We see Arrow just my my king Arrow. We see Ka, that hating [ __ ] just
02:22:17
grudging over there, >> just hating everybody. >> Uh we see Vecna, the baby VCNA.
02:22:23
>> Yep. >> And they come in and Arrow through this whole thing, Arrow discovers that Bella
02:22:30
has a block. She has a block that she is not affected by their special gifts. >> Like Arrow can hear everybody's thoughts
02:22:37
forever since they were he like conceived of. He doesn't with her. >> So then he he tests out.
02:22:43
>> He tests out Jane. He has Jane try he first he has Jane hurt Edward >> real bad.
02:22:48
>> And he's on the ground like screaming and Bella's like, "Stop it. Stop it." Like do it to me. Do it thing. She says,
02:22:53
"Do it to me." And >> she's like And he's like, "All right, give it a try." And he's like, "Let's
02:22:56
see." And it does nothing. And Dakota Fanning is so good in this cuz it's tight on her face while she's doing and
02:23:02
she does this little smile like closed lip smile while she's doing it that like she clearly enjoys doing this
02:23:09
>> and then when she realizes it's not working the smile just slowly fades from her mouth like she the the emotion work
02:23:17
she did so tight on that shot is amazing. >> I mean she's been working since Uptown
02:23:22
Girls. >> She has and she's a she's phenomenal. She really is. And Arrow when he sees
02:23:28
and she's pissed like she stop like once she like cuts the connection she's like
02:23:32
[ __ ] a and she just like looks at Arrow and Arrow does his laugh here. >> It's a beautiful laugh.
02:23:38
>> It's so >> it's a laugh for the ages. >> It's a laugh for all of us. >> It is. In fact, if I was there I think I
02:23:44
would laugh with him just because I'd be [laughter] like yeah >> so fun. Sounds like a giggly time.
02:23:52
>> It really sounds like a giggly time. So [ __ ] goes down at this point because I
02:23:58
think it's I think Felix is like the big >> macho man >> hulking guard that just like is the
02:24:04
muscle here. >> Yeah. He can throw you through marble like it's nobody's business.
02:24:07
>> A fight breaks out. >> Felix slams Edward into the porcelain floor. >> Yeah. And his skin cracks like porcel. I
02:24:16
thought that was such a cool effect. Like like cuz >> the whole lore of vampires is they are
02:24:22
like porcelain. And that whole lore of like when they [ __ ] it probably sounds like porcelain dishes.
02:24:28
>> Yeah. >> Slaming against each other. So when he got slammed down there and he cracked
02:24:32
like porcelain, I was like, you really kept that. >> But then they heal super fast and it
02:24:36
just heals like immediately. It was interesting. >> I was so worried about this porcelain
02:24:40
though. I said, "This is probably >> thousands of years old. How are you going to replace this?"
02:24:44
>> I know. I was like, "You're ruining your your office." >> Gorgeous castle. >> Yeah, that would piss me off. I'd be
02:24:49
like, "Fix it now." Yeah, >> they probably find somebody who will absolutely fix it for them or they could
02:24:53
just kill them. >> Yeah. And when Arrow gets close to Bella >> and he and he's saying how like she
02:25:01
smells so good like I don't know how I don't know how you hold and Edward's literally like it's tough. He's
02:25:06
[laughter] like like they have like a real mo like they have a real bro moment and like it's hard my guy.
02:25:11
>> And he does the thing where he says Isabella like right in her face and I was like I love Arrow so much.
02:25:18
Everything he says is topnotch. >> So weird. >> The way Michael Sheen plays him is so
02:25:24
scary because it's so unsettling but like so unsettling >> in such a small like >> unnerving way.
02:25:32
>> He's very he's very the mayor coded. Y >> like he's very like he's got that like
02:25:38
that weird charming thing that happens. I don't know. >> He's very fun though. Uh Marcus is
02:25:43
wearing mules >> I'm pretty sure. like he he's really wearing like a house slipper.
02:25:47
>> Comfy. >> I noticed and I said, "Yeah, >> I bet they're Gucci." >> I bet. >> I bet.
02:25:53
>> Um and the basically the thing is she need because she has this special ability that now Arrow has discovered.
02:26:01
He's like, "Well, now she needs to be one of us because I collect special vampires." And so he was like, "She's
02:26:07
got to be turned." And >> and she knows about them, too. >> Yeah. Like he knows she knows about us.
02:26:11
She knows too much. And she has the special ability. like we're turning her, [ __ ] And he's like, "I'll turn her."
02:26:17
And Alice is like, "Wait a minute." And she's like, "I've seen that she's going to be turned. I will do it myself." And
02:26:23
so Arrow checks this because he can check her thoughts. And he's like, "All right." And he sees this [ __ ] crazy
02:26:30
ass vision. [laughter] >> It's the vest of Edward and Bella running out of a Renaissance fair,
02:26:36
>> running slow motion [snorts] through the forest barefoot >> in Renaissance gar.
02:26:40
>> And she's wearing a dress. Yeah. It's full Renaissance vibes. Sunlight is glistening on their sparkling skin and
02:26:47
she's a vampire. >> It's insane. >> Yeah. And so he saw this and he's like, "Awesome." Like cool. And he's like, "So
02:26:55
like >> he literally like cl and is like, "Okay, >> all right. >> I'm going to let you guys get to it and
02:27:02
let me know what it's done." Like so fun. And Marcus literally stands up and goes, "Thank you
02:27:10
for your visit." [laughter] It took everything in him >> to sit up and thank them.
02:27:20
>> It took his whole ass to. [laughter] And he's like, "Get the [ __ ] out of here
02:27:24
cuz I'm going to go [ __ ] my pants. >> Get the [ __ ] out of here because I have
02:27:29
been sitting with this gas pain for a long time and it's about to come to fruition. So get out.
02:27:34
>> I just [gasps] I was like I would I I feel like I would have to be like thank you Marcus for
02:27:40
[laughter] sitting through this. >> I know you would. >> Thank you for your visit.
02:27:46
>> I was like >> you never visited anybody that said that to you? >> I love it. Not like that. But I'm going
02:27:50
to say that >> to everyone who leaves my home next next Christmas Eve. Yeah. >> Any guest we have in the pod lab before
02:27:58
they leave, I'm going to say thank you >> for your visit. [singing] >> So just know that. So [laughter]
02:28:04
>> hopefully all future guests listen to this one episode that is about Twilight
02:28:07
for some reason [laughter] >> so they know. >> We'll point you to it. So they leave and
02:28:15
as they leave a big giant tour group full of men, women, and children are coming into that room and Bella's like,
02:28:23
"What the fuck?" And Edward's like, "You should probably look this way." And as the doors close, you hear them all
02:28:28
[screaming] screaming >> because they didn't get to kill they didn't get to kill Edward. They didn't
02:28:32
get to kill Bella. So that's like [ __ ] >> Yeah. So they they went nuts on those
02:28:37
men, women, and children. >> It's pretty gnarly. Uh we see back home at Bella's house, she's, you know, in
02:28:44
bed talking to Edward. It's a whole >> She should never be allowed in her house again after leaving her in the middle of
02:28:49
the woods and requiring a search party. >> He's not. He says he's not. >> Okay, that's good.
02:28:53
>> He But Charlie does not know he's there. >> Okay, wonderful. Yeah, cuz they have a
02:28:57
whole discussion about how he's sorry and he failed her and he'll never do it again and blah blah blah blah. the whole
02:29:02
thing. >> How are you going to explain that back together? >> And then Charlie comes in and I said,
02:29:06
"I'm here." >> And Charlie's like, "Hey, don't [ __ ] do that to me ever again."
02:29:12
And she's like, "I won't." And he's like, "No, seriously, don't." And then before he leaves, he goes,
02:29:17
>> "And you're grounded >> for the rest of your life." And I was like, "Honestly, so valid. Proper
02:29:23
parenting." >> Proper parenting. Absolutely. >> And next to him on the wall next to the
02:29:28
door is a painting of wolves. >> Oh. And it's very much in the shot >> in Bella's room.
02:29:34
>> Yeah. >> Oh, >> there's a painting of Wolf. I noticed that this time. >> And this is when Edward says like it's
02:29:40
going to take a long time for him to forgive me. And he's like, "Yeah." And he's like, "Well, I'm not breaking all
02:29:47
like I'm not breaking his rules because he said I can't step foot through the front door." And he's like, and I came
02:29:53
in through the window. >> That's a loophole. >> Which I was like, you're a [ __ ]
02:29:56
nightmare. You're every parent's nightmare. >> Yes. You didn't say I couldn't come in
02:30:00
the window. That was [ __ ] implied. You dumb [ __ ] >> You [laughter] better put it in writing
02:30:04
when you ban somebody from [clears throat] this house in writing. You're not coming through the front
02:30:07
door, back door, side door, window, skylight. >> You're not burrowing underground. You're
02:30:12
not No way. >> You can't be in this house by any means. >> Any means. >> And you can't be on the property inside.
02:30:17
>> I was like, you're a [ __ ] nightmare. >> You can't even be on my street. What the
02:30:19
[ __ ] I don't even care if you live here. You're evicted >> from my street. And he literally says at
02:30:26
some point to her because they're talking again about, oh, they're in the car and she's like, "We should wait
02:30:31
until after graduation because I will be chiller for Charlie if he turn me after
02:30:36
we graduate and blah blah blah." >> And he's like, at one point he says, >> "We can figure out something to tell the
02:30:43
Vuri like like I'm not." And I was like, "You're annoying." Like you're annoying
02:30:49
now. And and honestly, I was with her on this because she's like, "You're dumb."
02:30:54
And so they go to Edward's house and she's like, "I no like I want to take a vote. I want all your family to take a
02:30:59
vote if they think I should be turned." >> And at one point he says something and
02:31:03
she literally turns around to him and she goes, "Shut up." And I was like, "Oh, you're ready to be a couple." I was
02:31:11
like, "You're ready for lifelong partnership." >> You absolutely are because there will be
02:31:15
moments for the rest of your life where [laughter] you turn around and say, [snorts]
02:31:20
And so she's like, "Take a vote." So, you know, Alice is like, "I already consider you a sister." My votes yes.
02:31:27
Jasper says, "It would be super sick to not want to kill you all the time." Valid. Rosalie, she votes no. And she
02:31:36
gives a very like I think her hers hits so hard >> and especially cuz we'll find out more
02:31:44
about her backstory next in the next movie. And she says, "This is not the life I would have chosen for myself."
02:31:51
Which I was like, EMTT because he's right next to her. And she says, "And I wish someone had been there to vote no
02:31:58
for me." >> Yeah. >> Which is I'm like, "She cares about you." >> That's the thing actually proves in that
02:32:05
moment that she does care about >> she would have just said, "Yeah, sure." Like, who gives a [ __ ] I thought it was
02:32:10
so poignant. Like I think that's such a good you you literally sit there and you're like, "Fuck yeah, Ros,
02:32:15
>> you're a girl. That's a girl. Like that's a girl's girl right there. I need you to remember that in the book Edward
02:32:20
Breaks a TV about this. Oh my god, I didn't remember that at all. He breaks a TV after the vote. Um, in the frequently
02:32:26
asked questions from New Moon on Stephanie Meyer's site, it says, "What did Edward break in the living room
02:32:31
after the vote?" Edward ripped in h into halves a 60in plasma TV that the Cullins
02:32:36
had shipped in from Korea because it's not available in the States yet. EMTT was a bit annoyed. What a little bit.
02:32:42
Can you imagine? I'd be like, "So, who's your wife?" >> Yeah. >> Who's your lifelong partner?
02:32:48
>> Yeah. >> What? >> Like, what's going on? >> Well, you're you're ripping a Korean TV
02:32:52
and >> you're ripping a Korean TV. >> Yeah. Like, >> because I You have to change me.
02:32:58
>> That's dumb as hell. >> And also, like, what are we voting for? The Vuri already. He's lit. Him and
02:33:03
Rosalie are the only standouts, too, cuz Emtt's after Rosalie says that very poignant, very like,
02:33:08
>> you know, that should give you a moment. He's like, he's like, "Fuck yeah." And
02:33:12
he's just like, "Hell yeah." >> And see that those are the moments when you turn around and you go, "Shut up.
02:33:17
>> Shut up." And Esme says, "I've always considered you part of the family anyways." And Carl says, "This is really
02:33:25
the only way." Like he's like the goal, but he's like, "The Vuri is going to make this a problem. Like we just have
02:33:31
to do it." >> So >> cuz like the Vuri will kill your whole family. >> Yeah. It's like just [ __ ] do it. It's
02:33:36
not It's just not that deep. Like it's really not. She wants to be a vampire. Let her be a vampire. That's the thing.
02:33:40
Like it's the consent is there. >> Yeah. She wants it. >> I'd be like, "Why don't you want to hang
02:33:44
out with me for eternity?" >> Exactly. My problem. >> Um but they get back in the car. He's
02:33:50
not pleased. Um Jacob ends up standing in front of the car shirtless and directing them into the woods. So they
02:33:56
go in there. >> Um >> they love to be directed into the woods. >> They love being directed into the woods.
02:34:01
Jacob is literally like, "I'm not letting you do this." And she's like, "Yeah, you don't have a choice. It's
02:34:06
it's my choice." But little does she know. And he's like he's like, "Okay, [ __ ]
02:34:12
>> I call treaty." >> And he was like, "Um, the treaty says that you can't bite a human." So,
02:34:17
>> or else like all bets are off. >> And he's Yeah. And he's like >> like there will be no peace between
02:34:22
vampires. And >> like treaty will be off. Like that's it. Well, and then and he's like and all he
02:34:27
says to her like, "If this happens, I'm not like I'm not responsible for what happens after cuz like
02:34:33
>> cuz you'll be a vampire. >> It's just the way it is. felt like I will have to be your enemy essentially.
02:34:39
>> Yeah. >> And it's like a really rough scene. You feel really bad. And at one point like
02:34:44
him and Edward go toe-to-toe and like he changes into a wolf. It's like a whole thing. And it kind of ends there with
02:34:56
you know I I think is this where Edward he asks her to marry him? That is this where Edward though at first he says
02:35:03
like we're going to find a way around this. >> Oh he asks her he's like how about 5
02:35:08
years give me 5 years and she's like no like this would annoy at this point I'd be like you got to shut the [ __ ] up and
02:35:13
>> I know he's really annoying about it. >> Put up or shut up. Let Alice do it. >> Yeah.
02:35:17
>> Let anybody else do it. >> Let Carile do it. >> Yeah. He'd be so careful. >> He seems fine about it. He's pretty good
02:35:22
at it. [laughter] He's done it a few times. Yeah. >> And uh she has to negotiate and he's
02:35:26
like you're really stubborn. And then he's like, "Okay, I'll do it, but on one condition.
02:35:30
>> Marry me." >> And then he says, "Marry me, Bella." >> He proposes in a Volvo while they're
02:35:34
driving. >> Not the proposal of my dreams. >> I don't even think Were they even in the
02:35:40
car yet? I think they were still in the woods. Oh my god. Are they still on the side of the road?
02:35:43
>> They're still in the side of the road. In the woods. >> And he doesn't even get down on one
02:35:46
knee, does he? >> It was right after Jacob left like in tears. >> Oh. And he's like, "This seems like a
02:35:51
good time." >> No, he doesn't get down on one knee, I don't think. >> No ring. It's It's a real amidst chaos.
02:36:00
It's a real uh a real move. But you know, that sent Bella into orbit. >> Yeah, she she's excited.
02:36:12
>> Well, so are we. >> So are we because Eclipse is a whole other I really like Eclipse.
02:36:19
>> Eclipse is like so much [ __ ] happening. >> Eclipse, honestly, the next three
02:36:23
movies. Is it three? Three movies. Yeah, cuz Breaking Down is broken into two. >> The next three movies I remember being
02:36:28
so much fun. >> Yeah, cuz I think New Moon for me like bummer was kind of like it dipped for me
02:36:35
and I was like >> Eclipse comes back because >> Eclipse brings it back. >> There's like uh there's like a a war
02:36:42
basically being >> Yeah. You start like seeing other pieces, the puzzle and >> and remember the love triangle gets way
02:36:49
more intense. >> And remember, Victoria is still in these streets. >> She is still in these streets.
02:36:53
>> We didn't get rid of her. No, we did not. >> So, so get ready for that. >> We hope you keep listening
02:37:00
>> and we hope you >> keep it vampy. >> Oh, no. >> I [music] went crazy. You went nuts.
02:37:07
>> You could keep it vampy. Werewolfy. Sparkly. >> Yeah. >> Sparkly. >> Sparkly and weird.
02:37:19
>> [music] [music] [music] >> Heat. Hey. Hey. Hey. [music] [music] [music] >> [music]
02:38:18
[music] [music] [music]