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R Rated Jokes & The Shuffler Ghost

April 27, 2026 / 59:44

Video

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You did see NC. Is that what they say?
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NC7.
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>> NC7. Yeah.
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>> But most of these jokes in Bus Boys. I'm
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just saying.
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>> No, these are too rough for bus.
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Honestly, it's too rough for bus boys.
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>> You get cute. It's not going to end. It
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won't end well for you. How'd that work
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out for them? How'd that work out for
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them?
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>> They got cute.
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>> I haven't heard get cute for so long.
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I'm getting tingly in my underpants.
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>> I feel funny like when I used to climb
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the rope in gym class.
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guards was the horniest.
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>> We got to get We got to get you in the
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gym with fastening your seat belt.
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>> Are we starting? It's Heather's
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birthday. That's what we're starting
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with.
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>> I know.
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>> Heather, are you excited?
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>> No. She got sick on that Gang
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last run of gigs. She came out. She
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doesn't always come out, but she came
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out to Nashville
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and saw bus boys with me and Theo. And
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then
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>> Mhm.
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>> she flew back and there's a guy hacking
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and snorting and coughing right behind
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her and she saw it coming.
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>> He what?
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>> He was right next to me.
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>> Oh, he's next to you.
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>> Blew his nose one handkerchief the whole
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time.
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>> Just kept blowing his nose, digging in
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that filthy seat back,
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>> stuffing it back in. knuckle knuckle
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deep.
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>> Knuckle deep in that seat back.
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Filthiest place in the world. Soaking
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his wet hanky with more germs.
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>> And then freezing air on Heather. Can we
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turn this down? Sorry. The pilot said
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we're we're getting it'll get under
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control. Right now we have the toilets
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don't work. We have no air conditioning,
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but uh sit back and relax. Enjoy. And
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then the person over here has their only
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person with their window open and pitch
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black. So it's like giving you LASIC on
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the side.
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>> Oh, she sent a picture in. So somebody
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>> I was trying to did not work.
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>> You can't really cover up from the germs
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like this.
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>> Yeah, I bugged someone once because we
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were flying out of Hawaii and I thought
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it was going to be really mellow, but
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then unfortunately two storms have
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converged on our path and so it was just
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rock and roll like you're at Six Flags,
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you know.
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>> So everyone's all locked in like that,
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you know. And so I kept once in a while
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I would peek because I could see cloud
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formations and know what where the
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turbulence was and when it might end. So
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I was going up and down for six hours
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this woman. So yeah, you sure opened
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your window a lot. This is after
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>> after the fact she Yeah. Yeah. So you
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kept opening and then you closed it.
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Then you opened it again.
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>> What did you think?
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>> I said I'm so sorry. I wish you'd told
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me I wouldn't have done it. I just I
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really like to go wee look lightning.
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>> I told a woman, can you come over and
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look? And she goes, "Hi, is there any
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way?" And she's just staring with her
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window open and I see this the waitress
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go. Can you We have a cusper. And she
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goes like this.
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Says no. I go, "Are you even allowed to
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say no? You have to every other [ __ ]
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thing. Even have a shoulder strap now."
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And you go, if we're going out, I'm not
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I I have to torque my neck to get this
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shoulder yank it. I go, what is that
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helping?
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>> We got to get We got to get you in the
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gym when fastening your seat belt.
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>> Even my seat belt, I'm like, I ratchet
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it down.
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>> It's like you're an arm wrestling chant.
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>> You know my my thing.
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>> What's your thing? Oh, yeah. This one.
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Yeah. I just And I They always love I'll
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go back a little bit.
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>> It kills. Gets on the plane, does a seat
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belt.
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>> There's a seat belt. Lock it. But
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there's the tongue way out like that.
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>> So the seat belt is really loose. And
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then I grab that. As soon as the flight
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attendant looks at me, I just go.
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>> Yeah. Wrapped around like a rodeo. Go.
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Yeah. Seven sec seconds. Eight seconds.
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All right. That's hilarious.
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Oh,
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why on god screener did I say yes?
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You know what Gervid told me about that?
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He goes, "Hey, couple of hops, couple of
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quick eight hour hops and then I get
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10%."
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>> Yeah, poor me. I got to go make some
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money.
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Oh, I'm money. Meanwhile,
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I'm sitting in my office. I get 10%. All
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I have to do is walk back down to my
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car, drive to my mansion.
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>> Stop the bombing. IT'S A SHORT HOP.
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>> GO. You know, you're the funniest guy in
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the world.
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>> That is me doing Edith Bunker as our
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turn into Edith.
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>> What are you doing, babe?
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>> Anyway,
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>> no. Stop the bombing. Stop the bombies.
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Another one. God love him. Anyway, what
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are we?
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>> Wait, here's more. Oh, here's a good
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plane story, too. I have from the road.
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>> Okay.
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>> Oh, Heather was with me. So, I think
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you're on this one. First of all, we're
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leaving. No, we're leaving Nashville to
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go to Pittsburgh gig and Elena's next to
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me and two things happen. One is we're
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pushing off forever. We're circling. I'm
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like, do they not know where the run?
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You know, it's like so long. I always
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go, are we going to drive there?
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get a few laughs and then uh yeah, a
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couple people go, "Yeah, cool." And then
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and then mid oh, there's a bomb scare.
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They go, "We have to go back. There's a
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bomb scare in Pittsburgh." Drive all the
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way back to the gate. And then we get to
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the gate and we're like, "How are we
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going to get a car to get to this 4-hour
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drive?" And then they go, "U all good.
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Heading back out."
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>> No idea. Uturn back out. So we make it
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Okay.
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>> Squeaky wheels.
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>> Yeah. Oh, I see.
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>> Like in a shopping cart. So then in the
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middle of flight, this is the real story
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here, D.
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>> I love it.
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>> Drunk lady.
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>> Ah, nothing.
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>> Slightly more mature, older.
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>> I'm torqued to talk to Elena, the other
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comedian.
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>> I don't realize like alien,
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she comes right here.
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>> Oh. And she goes, "I got a joke for
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you."
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By the way, no one stopped her. I don't
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know if she's coach first. I don't know
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where I am. I just
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>> fly in or she just leaned in or
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>> she leaned in.
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>> Leaned in.
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>> Hand on this hand on my armrest. Lean in
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too close. Even I saw Elena's eyes bug
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out like and she goes, "By the way, this
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is NC17 for people in your cars. Turn it
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down." So she says, "I got two jokes for
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you." She's got a little scratchy voice,
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a little mist.
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>> Well, I'm I'm getting a Jason Stratham
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vibe here for a second.
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>> Yeah. She's She's kind of rough and a
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little buzzed, and I'm feeling like a
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little vodka crayon on my neck.
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>> Yeah.
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>> So, she goes,
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>> "First one." By the way, I go like this.
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Huh? First of all, you know, I can't
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torque my neck too fast and I don't want
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to. I'm like,
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>> she's like, I'm feeling out. What is the
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emergency? Yeah. She goes, I don't know
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if I told Heather these. She goes,
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"What's the difference between jam and
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jelly?" And I'm like, "Um,
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oh, uh, I think one is made from real
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fruit." And she goes, "You don't jelly
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or [ __ ] down your throat."
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>> Nope. That's what you said.
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>> Uh, that's actually that's a pretty good
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joke.
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>> And it's pretty good throat. And I go,
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>> "It makes sense." I go,
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>> "Thro,
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>> yeah, jam it down your throat." I go,
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>> "And the the paired with the closeness,
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>> oh, the closeness of the lips scratching
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me." And then I go, "Ah, oh, okay,
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okay." And then she goes,
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she gives the laugh, donates it herself,
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and then she goes, "Okay, one more." I'm
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like, "Are you on a roll? Is there any
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inkling you're killing?" So she goes,
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"All right.
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And she goes, "All right, here we go.
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One more." Now she's got all this
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confidence even though we didn't laugh.
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>> She's on a roll in our language.
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>> I'm not connecting. Yeah, I'm not
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connecting eyes. She still We're both
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this way. Look at
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>> Give me your When she says that first
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punch line, what what happens to your
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face? Do you make a sound? Do you do a
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faint smile or blank?
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>> But she can't really see it, but I kind
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of go, "Oh, she's leaning in over you."
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I see.
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>> I go like this. Oh, okay. Okay.
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>> She's here.
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>> It's a little much. Yeah, she's over.
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But I'm like
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>> I kind of can't really see her, but I go
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>> ah wow wee. Okay. Like that was a little
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more than I thought. She was like got
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you with that one. I'm like I didn't
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react the right. I didn't go. Are you
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sure it wasn't Keith Richards? Because
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it's
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Go ahead.
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>> Kind of like that.
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>> It sounded like Okay.
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>> She as if it doesn't get any worse.
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She's It's a tandem of bits. So she says
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>> rapid fire. There's another one.
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What did the one tampon say to the other
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tampon walking down the street? And I go
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hopefully nothing. Hopefully
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>> because they can't talk. They're just
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walking peace. We're both stuck up
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[ __ ]
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>> No.
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>> Whoa.
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>> So bananas.
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>> Let's put a please stand by thing on
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here just for a second.
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>> I said it's a rough one. You did see NC.
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Is that what they say? NC7.
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>> NC7. Yeah.
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>> But weren't most of these jokes in Bus
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Boys? I'm just saying.
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>> No, these are too rough for bus.
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Honestly, it's too rough for bus.
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>> It didn't play in my neighborhood, so I
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couldn't see it.
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>> I know you were. You saw the trailer and
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you got through that and I appreciate
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it.
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>> Well, I'll be like some of us boys.
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>> And then she's so happy with herself,
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not going by any reaction, just like I
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did it. I did it. I told him I told
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those guys I would tell you these jokes.
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So then I go, "Oh, great." You know, um,
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oh, these are so good. I'll put them in
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my act, which I will. And
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>> but the idea of it was was a little much
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and a little alarming for me.
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>> Well, I I don't know if the same thing.
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I had a similar experience and this is
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just me like flash memory saying she
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leaned in. I was on a flight maybe a
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year after this. She goes, "I I know
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DAVID SPADE.
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I TOLD HIM SOME X-rated joke and I said,
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"You want a joke?" And I go, "Look, can
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you do one that's PG or something? I'm
00:10:57
just not in the mood." And she goes,
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"What's what? WHY IS A SHY BOY AND a
00:11:03
Toyus
00:11:05
kind of alike?" And she paused. I go,
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"What?" She goes, "THEY BOTH CAN'T COME
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OUT OF THE SHELL."
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That
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>> Oh my god, that's a clean one for her.
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>> Yeah, they come out of the shell. I
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should do a P. They both got come out of
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the show. So anyway, I made that up. But
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anyway, that was a good story. What
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else?
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>> That's that uh
00:11:26
that was that was funny.
00:11:30
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>> like I'd say a vanilla cake.
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cake, no guilt.
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>> So it's so it's all cake, no guilt.
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>> On top of that,
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>> but you're not eating a real cake.
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00:12:52
or Amazon today. Oh, I ran into Jeff
00:12:55
Frost last night and we should probably
00:12:57
have him on soon. Jeff Ross is the
00:12:58
>> Jeff Ross is a super nice guy who's got
00:13:01
it who does
00:13:02
>> Netflix show called Take a Banana for a
00:13:04
Ride where it's kind of off a Broadway
00:13:06
show he's been doing. So, might be
00:13:08
something fun to hear,
00:13:09
>> right? He's going dramdy basically,
00:13:12
right? head of Broadway.
00:13:13
>> That whole show is a different move.
00:13:15
Heartfelt and funny.
00:13:17
>> Uh Trevor Wallace also because he was in
00:13:20
Bus Boys, but we didn't have him on. We
00:13:21
were going to have him on before Bus
00:13:23
Boys, but he's he's on tour. He's very
00:13:25
funny. Has a great scene in the movie.
00:13:27
Uh well, you can look him up. But both
00:13:30
of those just because we've been
00:13:31
traveling so much.
00:13:33
>> But we'll get to it. And um
00:13:35
>> we have an Oreium gig. We have the big
00:13:37
Netflix is a joke show coming up.
00:13:39
>> Oh man. Yeah. Orium. And that is me,
00:13:42
you, and Chris Rock. We're going to do
00:13:45
our podcast. We're gonna have one of our
00:13:46
best friends, uh, Chris out there, and
00:13:49
it's at the Oreium in LA, come see us.
00:13:53
We're going to crack up.
00:13:54
>> Well, I think I don't know. I'm not an
00:13:56
advertising executive, but and I don't
00:13:58
know the protocol, but I think when I
00:14:00
looked at the tickets, because I like to
00:14:02
see the ticket master, oh, go to a
00:14:05
section, 721 free seats, you know.
00:14:09
So,
00:14:10
>> is that what it means? Oh, really?
00:14:11
>> Well, if you hover over it, it tell you
00:14:13
how many free seats. No, we're doing
00:14:15
great. It's just that it didn't say that
00:14:17
we have our uh our good friend Chris
00:14:19
Rock.
00:14:20
>> Yeah, that's that's the fun of it.
00:14:22
>> He's a ticket mover if you know what I'm
00:14:24
saying.
00:14:24
>> A live show with Chris and the RF even
00:14:26
holds about 2,000 probably. But uh it'll
00:14:28
be great. It's during the Netflix as a
00:14:30
joke. You know, when I did Nashville
00:14:31
this weekend, I did the Ryman. Great
00:14:35
>> great time. Great show. But, you know,
00:14:38
when it's a comedy festival,
00:14:40
>> yeah,
00:14:40
>> I have to say, love Nashville, love a
00:14:43
comedy festival, but there was no
00:14:45
cohesiveness. Like, for this one in LA,
00:14:47
Ted Sanders is going to have all the
00:14:49
comics over. There's something going on.
00:14:51
Like, here's the beginning of the
00:14:52
festival. Like, there's something to it
00:14:54
other than just here's
00:14:57
50 shows in your town spread out for 40
00:15:00
miles and that's your festival.
00:15:02
>> Yeah. If if you inherited some money
00:15:04
recently, you can see
00:15:07
all all the shows. There's there's
00:15:10
100,000 seats to be sold that dream.
00:15:14
That's true. That's true.
00:15:16
>> I know cuz I think our friend I love
00:15:18
this. Our a good friend Nate Bgatsi, I
00:15:21
think he's doing the Intuit dome. When
00:15:23
you when you start playing domes, you
00:15:25
know you're doing I mean there
00:15:27
>> there's domes
00:15:29
>> and arenas. arenas. But is a dome bigger
00:15:33
than an arena? Look it up.
00:15:34
>> I want to play domes. Uh I have to say,
00:15:38
so here I go. I don't sell out. It's
00:15:40
2400, so it's pretty big, but I don't
00:15:42
sell out till that night.
00:15:44
>> And I'm happy. And I'm like, I think
00:15:45
there's just too many choices to spend
00:15:49
your comedy money over a week or two of
00:15:51
a festival. And I said, "Even Shane
00:15:54
Gillis is playing this week." And they
00:15:55
go, "Yeah, he's playing tonight." I'm
00:15:58
like, "Wait, he's going tonight.
00:16:00
>> He's gobbling up early.
00:16:02
>> He's gobbling up the Bridgestone Arena,
00:16:05
which is like a dome."
00:16:07
>> So, I go, "Okay,
00:16:08
>> I don't want to go. I would rather see
00:16:09
Shane. I don't want to have people
00:16:11
pick." Then the guy goes, "Well, you
00:16:14
sold out." I go,
00:16:15
>> "I know, but
00:16:16
>> okay, here's what we do if we want to
00:16:18
have fun."
00:16:18
>> They cannibalize each other.
00:16:19
>> Absolutely. That when you play a big
00:16:21
city, there's a million choices. And
00:16:23
then you play Vegas, too. this comedy
00:16:26
festival.
00:16:27
>> It's so many seats. So, what we do if
00:16:29
we're bored, you know, you and Heather
00:16:31
and me and uh Greg, whoever, we just get
00:16:34
on a bus and we go kind of where Bob
00:16:37
Dylan goes. We go to Billings, Montana,
00:16:39
then we drive two hours to Great Falls.
00:16:41
We sell out the the the uh the college
00:16:44
arena,
00:16:45
>> right? And then we could do that. It
00:16:48
would be tough
00:16:49
>> off off what do they call them?
00:16:51
secondary markets just with great
00:16:53
audiences because a lot of people don't
00:16:55
come to their market.
00:16:56
>> Chattanooga, Little Rock, Memphis. I
00:16:58
mean, you go to the big cities first,
00:17:00
the second wave of the tour, you go to
00:17:02
where you land and then you drive two
00:17:04
hours. But the crowds are happy because
00:17:06
they don't get everyone. And so they're
00:17:08
like, "Hey, we need a show." And uh they
00:17:10
come out, they show up.
00:17:11
>> Yeah. Yeah. Harry Styles, I think we
00:17:13
talked about that, sold in like in 10
00:17:15
minutes 30 Madison Square Gardens.
00:17:18
>> Yeah. He's out of his mind,
00:17:19
>> but he's smart. Well, he's smart in a
00:17:21
sense that he just is in some house and
00:17:23
he helicopters to his gig instead of
00:17:26
touring. He's But huge fans have to fly
00:17:30
in there, get the hotel tickets. So,
00:17:32
it's like 5,000 to see Harry Styles.
00:17:35
>> Yeah, I I'm sure it's Yeah. Or Vegas,
00:17:38
you know, residency people come to see
00:17:40
you.
00:17:41
>> Uh, okay. Okay. So, that that that and
00:17:44
my one last thing before I let you talk
00:17:46
or say anything.
00:17:46
>> I don't have anything
00:17:48
>> is um I stayed another haunted hotel.
00:17:52
>> No,
00:17:52
>> I thought of Dana
00:17:54
>> Nashville.
00:17:55
>> I thought of your situation at that one
00:17:57
place.
00:17:57
>> Nashville's full of ghosts. By the way,
00:18:00
>> it was Pittsburgh. I said this hotel
00:18:02
because again they go they brag about
00:18:04
it. This hotel's 100 years old minimum.
00:18:08
>> Minimum.
00:18:09
>> It's 120. And then someone at the show,
00:18:14
I'm like, "Oh, where?" They go, "Where
00:18:16
you staying?" I go, "This place." They
00:18:17
go, "Oh." I go, "What's that?" I go, "Is
00:18:21
it haunted?" They go, "What? That's what
00:18:23
they say. That's the word." And you know
00:18:24
who they have? What? What famous ghost?
00:18:27
>> The shuffler.
00:18:29
>> The shuffler.
00:18:30
>> Oh, yeah.
00:18:31
>> Is that a famous ghost? I
00:18:32
>> It's in Pittsburgh. And I go, "Please
00:18:35
don't explain." And they go what it is
00:18:38
is
00:18:39
>> Mhm.
00:18:40
>> in different rooms they will hear
00:18:43
>> two feet
00:18:47
on your carpet.
00:18:48
>> Okay.
00:18:49
>> There's nobody there.
00:18:50
>> And you can book the shuffler rooms or
00:18:52
what?
00:18:52
>> Nope. The shuffler picks you.
00:18:56
>> And of course I go home scared. And
00:18:58
Dana, I kid you not. What happened at
00:19:00
6:00 a.m.? The [ __ ] shuffler.
00:19:03
>> Heather, I told you this, didn't I? And
00:19:05
of course, you put your phone on it.
00:19:08
You've got a recording and you've got
00:19:10
the sound to play for us. Now,
00:19:11
>> in a perfect world,
00:19:13
>> what I was doing is too busy calling 911
00:19:17
and trying to get
00:19:18
>> and what what would that sound like?
00:19:20
There's someone shoveling in my room.
00:19:22
>> Okay. So, I'm laying down, dead asleep.
00:19:24
Can't sleep on the road really because
00:19:26
it's different time zones and [ __ ]
00:19:27
>> Yeah.
00:19:28
>> And then I hear this.
00:19:33
So, four. And I go
00:19:35
>> and I swear I go, "This is not the
00:19:38
shuffler. It better not be the
00:19:40
shuffler."
00:19:41
>> No.
00:19:41
>> And I go, "You know what? It's the
00:19:43
garbage. It's someone in the alley.
00:19:46
>> 19th floor.
00:19:47
>> 19th floor."
00:19:48
>> Yeah.
00:19:49
>> And I go, "Why is the effing [ __ ]
00:19:53
shuffler coming to me knowing I'm
00:19:55
scared? That's probably why."
00:19:56
>> Mhm.
00:19:57
>> So, I get up. I get up. What am I going
00:20:00
to do? I'm so stressed my neck hurts
00:20:01
anyway.
00:20:02
>> Light on. get up. Yeah.
00:20:03
>> I can't deal with the shuffler. I can't
00:20:05
right now. So, I went back to bed and
00:20:08
just was like just that dead silence
00:20:11
where you're like, I don't want to hear
00:20:12
it again. Don't want to hear it again
00:20:13
because if I hear it again, I'll freak.
00:20:16
Don't hear it again.
00:20:18
Not great sleep. Still give a show that
00:20:20
night 10 out of 10. Other people's
00:20:22
words. But,
00:20:25
>> well, you know, you have to count your
00:20:27
blessings. First of all, whoever this is
00:20:29
is is between wherever you're supposed
00:20:32
to go. And he's so he's in between. He
00:20:33
goes, he's probably a pretty nice guy.
00:20:35
Like I want I want to have something to
00:20:37
do for a couple thousand years while I
00:20:38
hang out in this sort of zone,
00:20:41
>> you know? And he's not a violent guy. So
00:20:42
he says, I'm ah [ __ ] I'm going to
00:20:45
shuffle my feet, man. I'm I'm gonna
00:20:47
Right.
00:20:48
>> I'm I'm not gonna I had one where the
00:20:50
whole thing was u Yeah, there's a
00:20:51
strangler
00:20:53
ghost called the strang. Yeah, but don't
00:20:55
you know I I don't know what I'm talking
00:20:56
about. So, I was in the room. I'm like,
00:20:59
that's stupid. Turn the light out. 20
00:21:01
minutes later, it's like
00:21:05
>> I do like a ghost of the hook, you know,
00:21:08
>> and a name. The shuffler is kind of
00:21:10
cool. It's like the Joker. I had the
00:21:13
strangler
00:21:14
>> and I turned it on. It was like some
00:21:16
sort of milky figure. Looked a little
00:21:19
bit like
00:21:21
>> Burgess Meredith to be honest. And I
00:21:22
thought of you.
00:21:24
>> He's going to strangle your appointment.
00:21:27
rock.
00:21:29
>> It's just funny when you mention
00:21:30
someone's impression. There's a 1 1000
00:21:33
of Oh,
00:21:36
>> and then the joy of
00:21:38
>> how exciting I get to do it.
00:21:40
>> Yeah, it's great.
00:21:40
>> Uh, actually, when Chrisman Glover sees
00:21:43
the shuffler, he goes,
00:21:45
>> "Hey, you
00:21:47
get your god damn hands off me."
00:21:51
>> That's why he's like a junior Woody
00:21:53
Allen. You sure I know I know you you
00:21:56
probably have your special shoes on for
00:21:58
more traction on the carpet but no
00:22:00
you're a wonderful shuffler but you know
00:22:03
if you could do it in 10A I'd greatly
00:22:05
appreciate it because I enjoy my sleep.
00:22:09
>> You're a beautiful intelligent shuffler.
00:22:13
>> You know the shuffler has a hook. The
00:22:14
shuffler came in got talked about a lot.
00:22:16
We're talking about him now.
00:22:19
>> Look in Nashville when I went there. you
00:22:22
I can't remember the name of hotel old
00:22:23
and famous. The guy goes hello to the
00:22:27
Xavier Hotel and then you you
00:22:30
automatically before you check in they
00:22:32
give you a tour of where the ghost was
00:22:35
and where the ghost went and here he
00:22:36
would terrorize guests and then here's
00:22:38
the elevator shaft that he may fall
00:22:41
down.
00:22:41
>> People were killed in
00:22:43
>> Yeah, he's completely harmless but he
00:22:45
will scare you if you let him. Hold on.
00:22:48
>> He had a British accent.
00:22:51
>> Oh, you got the ghost. Oh, Heather got
00:22:53
the ghost tour
00:22:54
>> at the Ryman at the actual gig. The
00:22:56
Ryman is beautiful.
00:22:57
>> Oh, okay. So, she she know. Yeah, it is.
00:23:02
>> Oh, they say Hank Williams is up in the
00:23:04
corner um sitting there like a ghost.
00:23:08
>> Scoped out all the creakiness.
00:23:09
>> I like that. The shuffler. We don't know
00:23:11
who it is, what it is, but Hank
00:23:13
Williams. That's pretty hip. Nashville
00:23:15
was my favorite show almost of the whole
00:23:17
tour. It was so they were so [ __ ]
00:23:19
nuts. It was great.
00:23:22
>> Wish I could have been there.
00:23:23
>> I had no stamina to go see Shane after.
00:23:25
I was going to hoof over but it's so
00:23:27
crowded in those streets in Nashville.
00:23:29
Like driving like [ __ ] Ratatouille
00:23:31
couldn't get through. It's like our
00:23:33
driver's like going between people and
00:23:35
then there's cars on both side. I'm like
00:23:37
what are we doing? He's like we got to
00:23:38
go the other way.
00:23:39
>> Wait to our hotel
00:23:41
house. What? Chili's what? It's a lovely
00:23:44
way to spend your Friday evening in a
00:23:46
thing they call gridlock. Okay. There's
00:23:48
something about traveling eight feet in
00:23:50
two hours and kind of puts a little
00:23:52
extra lift in your step. All right.
00:23:56
All right. That's the take. Okay.
00:24:01
>> Like when Adam Scott said he uh took two
00:24:04
and a half hours to leave Coachella.
00:24:06
>> Oh, that Coachella story. My god.
00:24:08
>> Oh, I don't think that's up yet. That
00:24:10
might be up soon.
00:24:11
>> Yeah. But check that one out. a great
00:24:13
story about Coachella and the crowding
00:24:16
>> and how ridiculous is
00:24:18
>> what else before we get into hot
00:24:20
stories. D
00:24:22
>> I don't know. We got these two horses.
00:24:24
They're really cool and stuff and we
00:24:26
feed them and they're happy and this
00:24:29
horse really um
00:24:31
>> Oh, this
00:24:33
>> I just saw that too.
00:24:34
>> I saw that too. Well, when I come out,
00:24:37
it just stares at me because it doesn't
00:24:39
know if it's Tom. And Tom, my son Tom
00:24:41
feeds them a lot. So it just
00:24:43
>> st the horse doesn't know if you're Tom.
00:24:46
>> Yeah. Sometimes thinks what's this? But
00:24:48
what happened yesterday? Usually there
00:24:50
there's two of them and they wander
00:24:51
around. They're really good buddies and
00:24:52
we feed them little apples and stuff.
00:24:54
And
00:24:54
>> sure,
00:24:55
>> yesterday the big horse who's going to
00:24:57
have a baby in July started sprinting,
00:25:00
galloping across the the the yard, which
00:25:03
is huge, and then started bucking up.
00:25:07
did this for like 20 minutes.
00:25:10
>> Mhm.
00:25:10
>> Is it just zooies or what do you think?
00:25:13
>> I think it's I think it's one or two
00:25:16
things. One is a sudden surge of energy
00:25:18
and it's literally just working out kind
00:25:20
of.
00:25:21
>> Oh, I can still trample things, you
00:25:23
know,
00:25:24
>> or there was kind of a heavy wind and it
00:25:27
sort of spook spooked her. Yeah.
00:25:30
>> Your stories are about hotels. My story
00:25:32
is about farm life. greeners is the time
00:25:35
for me.
00:25:37
>> Sometimes when I look on Instagram, I
00:25:38
follow like a horse named Waffles with a
00:25:41
they're friends with a butterfly named
00:25:43
donut, you know, it's all and I and I
00:25:45
get hooked into these stories of like
00:25:47
these two inongruent animals are
00:25:50
friends.
00:25:51
>> Well, any kind of being on planet Earth
00:25:54
that has no higher consciousness and
00:25:56
just operates in this innocent thing.
00:25:58
Yeah. I mean, they live in the moment.
00:26:00
They don't. They make no judgment. And
00:26:03
they love us. Don't be
00:26:05
>> They want food and they want some
00:26:07
>> action. It's about it.
00:26:09
>> She already had some action. The stud in
00:26:11
the valley impregnated like 300 female
00:26:14
horses
00:26:16
and the other horses just
00:26:18
>> any any more work today, boss?
00:26:20
>> Yeah. No, you're driving around, you see
00:26:22
Stud Farm. You It sounds illicit. It
00:26:26
doesn't sound like some natural organic
00:26:28
thing, but then all these giant stud
00:26:30
horses come out and then it repeats
00:26:32
itself.
00:26:33
>> Then you drive by and the horse goes
00:26:34
like this.
00:26:36
>> Pull in. See what's going on here.
00:26:38
>> Yeah. No, they literally they do have a
00:26:41
sign of a horse. It's a stud farm. It's
00:26:43
like a big cartoon horse with a cigar.
00:26:45
You're right. Like, hey.
00:26:46
>> Yeah. Like this.
00:26:48
>> Just come on in. See what's going on. Yo
00:26:50
yo yo.
00:26:50
>> GUESS WHAT? I'M NEVER TOO TIRED.
00:26:54
The horse just has a sign says, "What
00:26:56
you doing?" Wyd yo yo yo roll.
00:27:00
>> Don't be greedy, ladies. There's plenty
00:27:02
to go around. I'm doing 70 today.
00:27:06
>> Heather, will you tilt that? Will you
00:27:07
turn that one down a little bit? And
00:27:08
then we're going to find buzzing around.
00:27:12
>> We got a buzzing around.
00:27:13
>> I do like the horse stud though. That's
00:27:15
kind of funny.
00:27:16
>> It's kind of kind of totally immobile
00:27:19
and don't know how to do anything.
00:27:22
>> Okay.
00:27:23
Okay. Easy.
00:27:24
>> Yes. See,
00:27:25
>> you want to show everyone your sick
00:27:26
face?
00:27:27
>> No.
00:27:27
>> You look You look good.
00:27:29
>> Shockingly looks good.
00:27:31
>> I'm doing six cross country trips. If I
00:27:33
get do all those and not get sick, it'll
00:27:36
be amazing.
00:27:38
>> Oh, yeah. You got all those cross
00:27:39
country flights, man. I just did three
00:27:41
weeks and three cross countries.
00:27:43
>> Sucked.
00:27:43
>> We're not complaining. We know it's a
00:27:45
first world problem.
00:27:46
>> No, I know. I'm complaining.
00:27:48
>> Just so they understand. It's part of my
00:27:51
charm to complain.
00:27:52
>> I just love to fly. So, anytime I'm in
00:27:55
the air, I
00:27:56
>> Oh my god. You see this? April to June.
00:27:59
Oh boy.
00:28:00
>> Okay. So,
00:28:03
>> it's time for
00:28:04
>> It's time for buzzing around. You do. Do
00:28:06
Do you know it's time for buzzing
00:28:07
around, Dana?
00:28:08
>> Yeah. I just felt like
00:28:09
>> you ready for buzzing around?
00:28:10
>> I have a little idea that I could We
00:28:12
talked about
00:28:13
>> with a wide variet. All right. This is
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00:28:31
>> at 5our energy.com or Amazon today. Look
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at
00:28:36
Now remember folks, these these little
00:28:38
riffs that David and I talked about, he
00:28:40
gives me ideas and there's nothing
00:28:43
really written out,
00:28:44
>> right? But not it's not it's not funny.
00:28:47
It's not prepared. It's nothing.
00:28:49
>> It is. I just thought I don't know why
00:28:52
you have a flight of fancy. I'm thinking
00:28:54
buzzing around. What would be kind of
00:28:55
interesting?
00:28:56
>> So I thought you're at sort of a
00:28:58
restaurant, bar, whatever. And you've
00:29:00
got oldtimey actors with new new movie
00:29:04
stars having a conversation, you know.
00:29:07
>> Okay. Good.
00:29:08
>> So let's get the characters here first
00:29:10
of all. Okay. First is Carrie Grant,
00:29:12
Jimmy Stewart.
00:29:15
I don't believe it. What a what a what a
00:29:17
delightful place this is. Don't you
00:29:19
think, Jimmy? Yeah, it's a great place
00:29:22
to have a cocktail.
00:29:24
What's your name?
00:29:26
>> Um, hey, I'm I'm Timothy Shalom. How are
00:29:30
you? Uh, Timothy what? Shalloway. I'm
00:29:33
Timothy Shalom. Are you Are you an
00:29:35
actor? Are you some kind of performer?
00:29:38
Yeah, I'm in movies. You ever seen Molly
00:29:39
Supreme? Well, you look I don't know.
00:29:42
I've never seen it. I've never heard of
00:29:43
it, but you good in it. Yeah, I think
00:29:46
I'm all right. Yeah, it's all right.
00:29:48
What do you guys Who are you guys?
00:29:51
>> Well, I'm John Wayne. This hair's
00:29:52
Walter.
00:29:54
Walter Brennan. Yeah, I'm I'm a
00:29:57
sidekick. Walter Brennan. That John
00:29:59
Wayne. No brag, just fact. Well, you're
00:30:02
a little on the slight side, Timothy
00:30:04
Shallow Womba.
00:30:05
>> No brag, just fact. What' he say?
00:30:07
>> No brag. No brag, just fact.
00:30:12
That was from the guns of Will Son in
00:30:14
1960s. He has three three sons and he
00:30:18
goes he's the third fascist. He in the
00:30:20
west, you know, he's the second fascist
00:30:22
and I'm the fascist. No brag, just fact.
00:30:25
>> I like that. I can say that.
00:30:28
>> Well, you're a little slight, Timothy
00:30:30
Shallow.
00:30:32
There was a tribe named after you. Yeah,
00:30:34
I'm pretty sure. Duke, what's your name?
00:30:37
Well, I'm the rock. Well, you're a big
00:30:40
you're a big glass of water. What have
00:30:43
you been doing? Well, I I lift weights.
00:30:45
What do you lift weights for? You should
00:30:48
lift logs. Good question.
00:30:50
>> And guns. And
00:30:53
what about you? What's your name? Well,
00:30:56
what's your name? Christopher Walkan.
00:30:58
>> What? I'm Christopher Walkan. Dookie
00:31:01
sounds funny. He can't be a movie star.
00:31:04
Do you make movies? Yeah, make a lot of
00:31:07
movies. I'm Christopher Walkin.
00:31:09
>> Yeah.
00:31:09
>> Wow.
00:31:11
Oh, but Lancaster Cook.
00:31:13
>> He He walked in.
00:31:15
>> Yeah. But Lancaster and Cuck Douglas.
00:31:20
>> Well,
00:31:22
>> you need oxygen.
00:31:23
>> Give me a second.
00:31:25
>> I know. There's two. There's so many.
00:31:27
>> I know. I don't know why we're here, but
00:31:30
we are. Right, B. Oh, we were just
00:31:33
wrestling at Cook's house. Greo Roman
00:31:35
style. We love to wrestle, don't we,
00:31:36
Cook?
00:31:39
We like to wrestle and then we have some
00:31:42
lemonade.
00:31:43
What?
00:31:45
>> Great. Nice. Hey,
00:31:47
>> nice.
00:31:48
>> Hey, what what's your name? I What's
00:31:51
your name? You look vaguely familiar to
00:31:53
me. Hi.
00:31:56
Hey, I'm George Clooney. George Clooney?
00:31:59
Well, you look exactly like me. You
00:32:00
could be my double langanger, couldn't
00:32:02
you, John Wayne? Well, he sure could be
00:32:05
your doppelganger, right, Jimmy Stewart?
00:32:07
Yeah, he looks like a real
00:32:08
doppelanganger. What about you, Walter
00:32:10
Brennan? Yeah, no brags. In fact, he's a
00:32:12
doppelanga.
00:32:15
I'm Boot Lancasta. He's a doppelanga.
00:32:18
And I think we're going to have to cut
00:32:19
this sketch down in post.
00:32:21
>> We'll tighten it up.
00:32:22
>> Well, we'll cut it down. All right,
00:32:25
we'll keep the funny parts and scene.
00:32:29
>> Scene. Holy
00:32:31
>> [ __ ] Was that buzzing around or not?
00:32:34
That was buzzing around.
00:32:36
>> I didn't have a script as you could
00:32:37
tell.
00:32:38
>> Tasty caffy, but I like it when it's a
00:32:40
little rough on the
00:32:41
>> It's a little messy.
00:32:43
>> Enjoy big flavor in a tiny bottle. Five
00:32:45
energy shots. Pack the flavors of the
00:32:47
season.
00:32:48
>> Mhm.
00:32:49
>> Portable 2 oz shot.
00:32:50
>> We should do this trick where I go like
00:32:52
that and then you reach and you grab it.
00:32:54
You know,
00:32:55
>> find five energy shots at five
00:32:57
energy.com or Amazon today. Let me see.
00:32:59
What did you want to do? Let me Well,
00:33:00
what I would do would be like, "Here,
00:33:02
here, David. You have one." And then you
00:33:04
would have
00:33:04
>> Okay, Heather's going to try it. Ready?
00:33:06
>> Okay.
00:33:06
>> Okay. Get ready, Heather.
00:33:07
>> Where do I What do I do with it? Just
00:33:09
>> go toward the camera.
00:33:10
>> Go toward the camera.
00:33:11
>> Oh, no.
00:33:12
>> Why are you Why is it
00:33:13
>> Heather just stepped on the camera and
00:33:15
unplugged it.
00:33:16
>> We But please stand by. We have an
00:33:17
emergency.
00:33:18
>> Please stand by.
00:33:19
>> Please stand by.
00:33:20
>> I don't even know where it came out of.
00:33:24
>> Okay, here we go. We got it. We got it.
00:33:25
>> Okay.
00:33:25
>> Okay, you start to hand it.
00:33:27
>> Okay, here we go. A thanks, Dana.
00:33:31
>> Not bad,
00:33:32
>> dude. That wasn't AI, folks. That was
00:33:34
>> That wasn't AI. He actually got it.
00:33:36
Look. Do I look like I have it?
00:33:39
>> It went over to him. Look,
00:33:40
>> too heavy.
00:33:42
>> There's no other explanation except that
00:33:45
somehow it teleported to David
00:33:47
>> AI. Uh,
00:33:49
>> okay. Let's go with some stories. Let's
00:33:51
hit it.
00:33:51
>> Let's hit it. Now,
00:33:52
>> what do we got? Oh my god. What's in the
00:33:53
news?
00:33:54
>> What's What's happening?
00:33:55
>> Making my screen brighter. I'm going to
00:33:57
respond spontaneously. All right.
00:34:00
>> Oh, Oklahoma principal who disarmed gun
00:34:04
wielding intruder crowned prom king.
00:34:07
Finally, they're nice to one of the
00:34:08
teachers. I always see them beating up
00:34:10
teachers, but these kids today. So, this
00:34:13
guy,
00:34:15
I heard the story. This this there was a
00:34:18
school shooter and the guy tackled him.
00:34:20
>> The principal tackled him and I think he
00:34:22
got shot.
00:34:23
>> Uh,
00:34:25
>> that's awesome. They all voted him and
00:34:27
he got applause.
00:34:29
>> Oh, we have video. You know, he's a bit
00:34:31
of a tearjerker though because, you
00:34:33
know,
00:34:33
>> well,
00:34:34
>> they show a video of him tackling the
00:34:36
guy and I think he takes a bullet, but
00:34:38
he lives and then he goes to prom and
00:34:40
they see they conspire to vote him prom.
00:34:44
>> Uh, yeah, I always wonder. You never
00:34:46
know. But the studies they've done is
00:34:50
that and he's obviously really brave. A
00:34:52
lot of people respond like that when
00:34:54
it's just they don't have a second,
00:34:55
>> right? When you can't
00:34:56
>> I mean, not that it's still highly
00:34:58
unusual, you know. You would have been
00:35:00
under the desk with me crying.
00:35:03
>> Okay, let's see what this is. This is
00:35:04
probably too long.
00:35:06
>> Oh, here he is at the prompt there
00:35:08
getting the award.
00:35:10
>> Our queen is Michelle.
00:35:12
>> They back up. You don't have to go all
00:35:14
the way back to the queen.
00:35:16
Some cheerleader, I'm sure.
00:35:20
>> Our king. Here we go.
00:35:24
>> Oh, big applause.
00:35:28
>> Where is he? They don't even know where
00:35:30
he is.
00:35:30
>> Wow.
00:35:33
>> Oh.
00:35:33
>> Oh, here he comes.
00:35:34
>> Look at this dude.
00:35:35
>> Oh, okay. Is he walking a little slow?
00:35:39
>> Getting some low fives.
00:35:43
>> Didn't over.
00:35:44
>> Oh, he's getting a a crown.
00:35:46
>> He He doesn't look like he's young and
00:35:48
athletic. He just did it through
00:35:50
adrenaline.
00:35:51
>> No, he laid he laid on the guy. He like
00:35:53
tackled him and got on top of him.
00:35:55
>> Yeah.
00:35:55
>> Oh, here's the video.
00:35:57
>> Wow. Oh, okay. Here's
00:35:59
>> me.
00:36:00
>> The shooter coming in. Hey, what's up?
00:36:03
>> Hey, man.
00:36:03
>> And what does he want? What are these
00:36:05
shooters?
00:36:06
>> Is that him? Okay, someone's sitting on
00:36:08
the bench. Can you see that?
00:36:09
>> Okay, he's got a revolver.
00:36:11
>> This guy doesn't He's walking in. He's
00:36:13
threatening.
00:36:14
>> Oh, boom. From the side in the face. Oh,
00:36:17
and he's got his hand on his gun,
00:36:18
>> but he's trying to dig him, but he's
00:36:20
hard with those New Balance on. He's
00:36:21
trying
00:36:22
>> He hasn't let He hasn't got command of
00:36:23
the drug uh gun yet. Sorry.
00:36:25
>> No, but I think he got shot at some
00:36:27
point.
00:36:28
>> Oh.
00:36:29
>> Oh, there's the gun.
00:36:30
>> Yeah, they got the gun.
00:36:32
>> This other dude grabs it.
00:36:33
>> Did he really get shot?
00:36:34
>> Don't eat it. Yeah. And then uh I
00:36:36
thought they said he got shot, but
00:36:39
>> yeah, good job. Hero, right?
00:36:42
>> Well, that was that was awesome. I like
00:36:44
that's a feel-good story. I mean, you
00:36:46
know, it shows you the times have
00:36:48
changed. You know, we'd have a prom king
00:36:50
and he was like the stud football
00:36:51
player.
00:36:52
>> Now it's who's ever the best at tackling
00:36:54
active shooters is generally the king.
00:36:57
>> Gets lot gets more votes.
00:36:59
>> It's so common.
00:37:00
>> They said it was awkward the next day
00:37:02
when the prom queen did the walk of
00:37:04
shame out of his apartment.
00:37:07
>> She's like, "Hey, man. It's kind of
00:37:09
mandatory, king queen."
00:37:13
>> Yeah. There's there's other different
00:37:15
things that go on in these high schools.
00:37:17
You want to go you want to go back to
00:37:19
high school part of you.
00:37:20
>> I I sort of do. I want some movie
00:37:22
credits and then go back to high school.
00:37:25
>> Well, that was a movie. Yeah, that'd be
00:37:27
a great that'd be a great movie. You go
00:37:29
to your high school reunion and you
00:37:31
know,
00:37:31
>> no, I go back in time and I still look
00:37:34
too old even though they do all the CG
00:37:36
high in the world and they're still like
00:37:37
this guy's too old. Oh, by the way, I
00:37:40
thought you were great in the Is it the
00:37:41
comeup? The what was the name of the
00:37:43
movie? Was it
00:37:43
>> Outcome?
00:37:44
>> Outcome. Sorry, I could never.
00:37:46
>> You saw Outcome?
00:37:47
>> I did. I thought you were great in it.
00:37:49
>> Oh, yeah. Thank you.
00:37:50
>> Very natural. Funny. I wanted more of
00:37:53
you.
00:37:53
>> I know there was more.
00:37:56
>> Wait, there's more.
00:37:57
>> I hit up Jonah Hill and I go, Jonah,
00:37:59
come on, dude. And he's like, I know. I
00:38:01
think the movie was probably two hours,
00:38:04
a little over two hours and they cut it
00:38:06
down to an hour 23. So, I said, "Oh,
00:38:09
because I saw Matt Bulmer and the other
00:38:11
guy in the movie. He's a good-looking uh
00:38:13
dude and he's super cool." Anyway, he
00:38:15
was like, "Oh, dude, I got about a half
00:38:17
hour hacked." I had a big scene with
00:38:19
Keanu where after some thing, you find
00:38:22
out in the movie of Mia.
00:38:24
>> Uhhuh.
00:38:24
>> Then I see Keanu and on the balcony and
00:38:28
it's very awkward.
00:38:30
>> Yeah. and we're having a talk and my
00:38:33
wife had a baby so I'm holding a baby
00:38:36
>> and it's the most awkward talk and I go
00:38:38
and Jonah was like it kind of felt like
00:38:40
the end of the movie so we had to
00:38:42
>> get rid of it and I'm like how about you
00:38:44
get rid of the real ending and keep that
00:38:47
there's some brainstorming
00:38:48
>> oh you're not afraid to kind of crack
00:38:49
the whip when you need to get up some
00:38:51
hill face no he was great in that it was
00:38:54
really funny and Ke Ree was charming it
00:38:57
was a cool movie I I just wanted to
00:38:59
insert this because it may not be I just
00:39:01
Trump always comes up with phrases that
00:39:04
make me laugh and the fact you the cute
00:39:07
thing he keeps working that just you
00:39:09
know we're going to make a great deal
00:39:12
we're going to make a great deal as long
00:39:14
as they don't get cute if they get cute
00:39:16
>> get cute is a great term
00:39:17
>> I mean it's a global conflict there's
00:39:19
weapons flying around no one's they
00:39:22
could get cute if they get cute it won't
00:39:25
work out they might get cute if they
00:39:27
don't get cute I think we can make a
00:39:28
deal we can make a deal If they don't
00:39:30
get cute, if they get cute, we won't
00:39:31
make a deal with them.
00:39:32
>> I warned them. Don't get cute.
00:39:33
>> Cute and deal. Deal and cute.
00:39:35
>> You were warned. And then the spokesman
00:39:38
comes out and says, "President Trump has
00:39:40
warned them not to get cute." So, uh, if
00:39:42
if you see people getting cute, you know
00:39:44
what's going to happen.
00:39:46
>> You get cute, it's not going to end. It
00:39:49
won't end well for you. How'd that work
00:39:50
out for them? How'd that work out for
00:39:51
them?
00:39:52
>> They got cute.
00:39:54
>> I haven't heard get cute for so long.
00:39:56
>> I know. And he uses it. I just No one
00:39:58
talks like that. Get cute.
00:40:01
>> Mhm. I wanted to throw that in here.
00:40:02
>> That's funny. It's not the place for it.
00:40:05
>> No, it's it's a heavy conflict, but get
00:40:08
cute. We could make a deal. He said deal
00:40:11
319 times within the last 20. We could
00:40:14
make a deal. We might get a deal. They
00:40:16
want to make a deal. Unless they get
00:40:17
cute and they get cute, we won't.
00:40:20
>> It's like saying he's acting like a real
00:40:22
weirdo.
00:40:24
Those Iranians are so weird sometimes.
00:40:26
You're like, "No, that's not the right
00:40:28
word."
00:40:30
>> Mhm. People liked Hansen and Fron's
00:40:32
closing the straight of Hermus. Thought
00:40:33
it was a good idea.
00:40:34
>> Oh, that's a great idea.
00:40:36
>> With the muscular boulder size.
00:40:41
>> For many men, uh, the shift can happen
00:40:43
gradually or all at once. Workouts feel
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harder. Yes. Uh, energy dips. Recovery
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takes longer. Even routines haven't
00:40:51
changed. One major reason is
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testosterone levels can start declining
00:40:55
around age 30, dropping at 1% each year.
00:40:58
But it's not just about how much
00:41:00
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00:41:02
also about how much is actually
00:41:03
available to use. A protein called SHBG
00:41:07
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00:41:10
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00:41:15
working effectively. Marsmen is a
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support our show and tell them our show
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sent you. It's called Fly in the Wall.
00:42:20
All right, next story. I don't
00:42:21
>> This is the scene from Buzz Boys if he
00:42:23
told me it's a great idea. And I go,
00:42:25
"Oh, wait. This is too funny. Read the
00:42:27
top."
00:42:27
>> Okay, this Wayne's World
00:42:31
remake looks terrible. We've got we've
00:42:34
got
00:42:35
Joe Biden's
00:42:38
was the blonde woman in Joe Biden's
00:42:40
administration.
00:42:41
>> I thought this is just random people.
00:42:43
>> Oh, hilarious.
00:42:45
>> That's so funny. Looks like Hank
00:42:46
Kingsley on the left from Larry Sanders.
00:42:48
>> Oh, I thought it was That's not Jack
00:42:50
White.
00:42:51
>> Oh, that's not Well, I know one is
00:42:53
Michael Mike Myers, but that's not you.
00:42:56
>> That G is a little different. I'm gonna
00:42:59
say it. If it's just random fans, God
00:43:01
bless you. But that is
00:43:02
>> that's funny.
00:43:03
>> Yeah, they're happy. It makes them
00:43:05
happy. I think that
00:43:06
>> a fun get meds game.
00:43:07
>> Wayne does not wear glasses.
00:43:10
>> Oh, that's right.
00:43:11
>> That's the giveaway.
00:43:13
>> All right, party on.
00:43:15
>> Something stupid.
00:43:16
>> Hey, that was a really nice one you did.
00:43:18
I liked it a lot, you know. But next
00:43:21
time, make sure that Wayne doesn't wear
00:43:22
glasses.
00:43:24
>> Your hair is on fuego today.
00:43:26
>> Well, I I washed it. You know, you do it
00:43:29
the night before,
00:43:31
>> of course.
00:43:31
>> And then when I woke up, I had this and
00:43:34
I did it wasn't planned and I thought I
00:43:36
tried to squish it down and it just went
00:43:40
>> I know. I did a little per plus myself
00:43:42
yesterday.
00:43:45
>> Mhm.
00:43:46
>> Oh yes. You and the plant are both like
00:43:48
this.
00:43:50
>> Well, I'm like Springsteen, you know.
00:43:51
Yeah. When I put on my big boy boots and
00:43:54
my hat, that's six foot Warner
00:43:55
Springsteen coming at you. So with me as
00:43:59
G when my hair goes like that that's
00:44:01
five six and a half of Dana Carvey
00:44:03
coming at you. No actually tell
00:44:06
>> per plus is conditioner and shampoo and
00:44:10
body wash and deodorant.
00:44:13
>> The plus is all that. What if it was
00:44:15
just per it would just be shampoo? No,
00:44:17
nobody wants just per
00:44:20
per like actually Seinfel used to say I
00:44:23
took some extra strength
00:44:26
anis or whatever buffering or whatever
00:44:28
his old line was. Extra strength Advil.
00:44:31
What happened to just strength? Who's
00:44:33
ever going to just take strength after
00:44:35
extra strength?
00:44:36
>> I know that's
00:44:37
>> I like to take just
00:44:38
>> very Jerry extra strength. Can I What
00:44:41
about the strength one? Who would get
00:44:42
that one? They could get extra strength.
00:44:46
I can't believe this. People, by the
00:44:49
way, Nyquil's gone [ __ ] bazudi. They
00:44:51
have And I have Zquil now. I have clear
00:44:55
Z equil with no sugar. It's not blue.
00:44:57
It's clear,
00:44:59
>> which is actually good.
00:45:00
>> And then they have regular Nyquil. Then
00:45:02
they have daytime dayquil. Then they
00:45:06
have Nyquil for pain.
00:45:09
And now they have severe pain Nyquil and
00:45:12
severe flu. I'm like, god dang, they
00:45:16
fill out an Amazon warehouse just for
00:45:17
night. Great memory for you to get
00:45:20
through all that. I was just like, when
00:45:22
you really have to sleep and you're
00:45:24
really sick, Nyquil really knocks you
00:45:27
out. But the last time I go, cuz I kind
00:45:29
of feel a little groggy the next day, I
00:45:31
just had my wife take a sledgehammer and
00:45:33
just hit me and knock me out with that
00:45:35
and I slept great. It's about the same
00:45:38
strength because Nike will if you have
00:45:40
that little cup and you wake up and it's
00:45:42
on your bed on the side and I'm like
00:45:43
you're out. I mean my friend said, "Oh,
00:45:46
I tried that." And I go,
00:45:47
>> "Well, don't do like a little teaspoon
00:45:49
because you got to get used to." And he
00:45:51
goes,
00:45:52
>> "Oh, I filled that whole cup
00:45:54
>> over the line."
00:45:55
>> He goes, "I woke up at 400 p.m. the next
00:45:57
day." I go,
00:45:58
>> "Dude, Nyquil's no joke. I wake up like
00:46:01
this and it just the Nyquil's dribbling
00:46:03
out and the cup is sort of bent and just
00:46:05
kind of caught up in my pajamas
00:46:07
>> and the cops pick it up with a glove.
00:46:09
They go Nyquil related.
00:46:11
>> Do you wear pajamas? Does anyone
00:46:14
>> I wear PJs?
00:46:17
>> Does any human wear pajamas anymore?
00:46:19
>> I wear sweats.
00:46:21
>> Well, that's not pajamas. Sweats and a
00:46:23
t-shirt if you're cold.
00:46:24
>> Full like button down.
00:46:26
>> Button down. Ricky Ricardo. I love Lucy.
00:46:30
>> Matching. Heather wears matching.
00:46:33
>> Cute and matching sets.
00:46:35
>> That's adorable.
00:46:36
>> Sets is a word you don't know, Dana, but
00:46:38
that's She wears an airport set.
00:46:40
>> A set. Yeah. Yeah. You want to buy Yeah.
00:46:43
>> Every woman at the airport is in sweats
00:46:45
and a hoodie that matches.
00:46:48
>> Yeah.
00:46:48
>> And they pull the hoodie and But guess
00:46:50
what? The germs come through to
00:46:52
Heather's.
00:46:54
>> Heather, I want to ask you a question.
00:46:57
Were you masked or unmasked during the
00:47:00
flight?
00:47:03
>> I look on your text their fly on the
00:47:05
wall text message. You'll see what I
00:47:07
looked like.
00:47:08
>> Oh yeah, we have a picture. If you see
00:47:10
that picture, throw it up or just throw
00:47:12
up.
00:47:14
>> And I think the problem was the who
00:47:18
didn't stop blowing his nose for four
00:47:20
and a half hours was not wearing a mask
00:47:21
and never washed his hands or moved at
00:47:23
all.
00:47:24
>> Yeah. The guy heaving and coughing was
00:47:26
sitting next to her and didn't wear mask
00:47:27
and didn't apologize profusely and
00:47:29
didn't throw himself off the plane.
00:47:31
>> I was physically showing how
00:47:33
uncomfortable
00:47:33
>> the amount of people who are sick and
00:47:35
go.
00:47:35
>> Here comes the picture. Here it is.
00:47:37
>> Oh, that's Heather. Oh, so you're you're
00:47:39
you know you're being exposed. So you
00:47:41
became the invisible man.
00:47:43
>> That was my whole four and a half hours.
00:47:45
I still got sick.
00:47:47
>> I Oh, that's her eye. I get
00:47:48
>> Well, how did David not get sick? Immune
00:47:50
system of iron. What is he? Superman.
00:47:53
Oh, we split up because she came for the
00:47:56
first gig and then the uh
00:47:58
>> Oh, bus boys screening and Q&A and then
00:48:01
she flew back and uh I was on my way to
00:48:04
Pittsburgh with the bomb scare.
00:48:07
>> It's hard. I got CO and then I had I got
00:48:10
the guy to get me Helvette right away.
00:48:12
This was months ago, but I had a gig in
00:48:14
Vegas and I'm going, well, I can either
00:48:17
go or not go, but day one pretty good.
00:48:20
Pretty good. I think I can go. I I don't
00:48:22
think I'm contagious. And then I was
00:48:24
just laying in bed all day and I did the
00:48:25
gig. Pretty good story, right?
00:48:27
>> Did it was it the worst day of when you
00:48:28
were sick?
00:48:29
>> No, the Pax Slovette for me because I
00:48:33
got it early.
00:48:36
>> I popped up pretty hard. But I I was
00:48:39
still was very tired. But you know, you
00:48:41
fake it till you make it in show
00:48:42
business.
00:48:43
>> You can get through it. An hour is
00:48:44
tough. Some of those gigs, an hour is
00:48:46
tough.
00:48:46
>> I love it when they say uh 45 would be
00:48:49
fine. That means I pick up my guitar at
00:48:52
35. Whoops. Tricks of the trade. When
00:48:55
they're drunk and tired and it's
00:48:56
midnight.
00:48:58
>> Hey. Hey. My my
00:49:01
>> Yeah.
00:49:01
>> This company gets me very high,
00:49:05
>> right? I'm doing one in Salano. I'm
00:49:08
doing 30 this weekend
00:49:10
>> and then a meet and greet.
00:49:13
>> I don't think so.
00:49:14
>> Just 30 minutes and get out. That's
00:49:15
pretty good.
00:49:16
>> But you know who I have to follow?
00:49:17
George Wallace. And he kills.
00:49:20
>> You're following George Wallace. Isn't
00:49:22
>> that funny? Bob Zany and George Wallace.
00:49:24
Yeah.
00:49:24
>> You don't, man. You're Well, you always
00:49:27
find a way cuz you'll come out different
00:49:29
and you'll do your sort of self- aacing
00:49:31
stuff.
00:49:32
>> Yeah.
00:49:32
>> And then they then they love you.
00:49:34
>> The funniest part is you know that
00:49:36
George Wallace kills. Just as when I
00:49:38
told you that, you're like, you're
00:49:39
following George.
00:49:40
>> George Wallace is a killer, man. Big,
00:49:43
strong president. Incredibly likable.
00:49:45
We'll do a little bit of crowd work,
00:49:47
work it back around. No, I
00:49:48
>> you don't want to follow that guy, but
00:49:50
you can cuz you're David Spade.
00:49:53
>> I followed Dana Carve and if you can do
00:49:55
that. Um,
00:49:56
>> okay. Let's play another story and then
00:49:58
we'll
00:49:59
>> we'll wrap up soon. Everyone's I got so
00:50:02
much
00:50:02
>> got so much to do.
00:50:05
>> Wait,
00:50:06
>> don't get cute on me, David. Don't get
00:50:08
>> Is this evidence
00:50:10
>> that Anthony Albanese is not real?
00:50:15
>> Like it's just a digital copy. Minister
00:50:17
Anthony is not real. He's actually
00:50:20
replaced by Dana Car from Weswell.
00:50:24
>> And where's your evidence of this
00:50:25
Cameron?
00:50:26
>> Okay. In 1990, Dana Carve did a movie
00:50:29
called Opportunity Knox. The impressions
00:50:31
George W. Bush in
00:50:32
>> the impressions in a toilet saying
00:50:34
handheld bad
00:50:37
hand pan dryers good. Very good. Also
00:50:40
master disguise 2002 church lady in in
00:50:43
Saturday live. You hardly see him
00:50:45
anymore. He's doing podcast with um
00:50:48
David
00:50:51
pre-recorded. He's out busy how he's
00:50:53
getting around going to Malaysia,
00:50:54
selling deals with petrol, going the
00:50:56
footy, going to Hawthorn games, going to
00:50:58
rabbit games. It's damn
00:51:01
Alene they wear glasses.
00:51:06
He sounds like someone from God on
00:51:09
YouTube.
00:51:10
>> How did they find me? He's so fun.
00:51:15
>> That Dana Cav Dana Cavy Cavy
00:51:19
>> flying the Wow.
00:51:21
>> That was a doppelanger, man. We should
00:51:23
have him on the show, man.
00:51:26
>> Let's get him on the show.
00:51:27
>> Of all people, my conspiracy is that
00:51:30
Dana is this guy that doesn't really
00:51:32
look like him.
00:51:34
>> I told you before we did these things
00:51:35
today. I said, "Oh, you got some clips."
00:51:37
I go, "Don't get cute. Don't get cute on
00:51:39
me."
00:51:39
>> We got cute.
00:51:40
>> Don't get me cute. Dude, you made two
00:51:42
appearances. You made Wayne's World.
00:51:45
>> Yes.
00:51:46
>> In the news.
00:51:47
>> Everything keeps going.
00:51:48
>> That's funny. It just what goes around
00:51:50
comes around, man.
00:51:51
>> Oh, yeah.
00:51:51
>> You're big. Uh, okay. One more.
00:51:54
>> Okay.
00:51:55
>> One more.
00:51:55
>> One more.
00:51:56
>> Well, this is our final I'll use our
00:51:58
sponsor. This is our final uh clip of
00:52:00
the day.
00:52:01
>> Oh, this is a real thing to talk about
00:52:03
about the state of Hollywood. Okay. Go
00:52:06
ahead.
00:52:06
>> Okay.
00:52:07
>> Doug Lyman, big director. Lyman's new
00:52:09
movie starring Casey Affleck and Pete
00:52:10
Davidson should have cost around $300
00:52:12
million, but according to the producers,
00:52:14
they made it for about 70 million using
00:52:17
AI and it was filmed in just 20 days
00:52:19
almost entirely inside this converted
00:52:21
showroom in London. And what nobody is
00:52:24
talking about is what this could mean
00:52:25
for the industry because all of the
00:52:27
studios are quietly experimenting with
00:52:29
versions of this workflow right now. I'm
00:52:31
Jason Fischer, the founder of stage
00:52:33
runner and former head of production at
00:52:34
Disney Paramount and AMC. Today it's
00:52:37
part two, how AI is going to impact
00:52:39
Hollywood and what it means for
00:52:40
production and jobs. And it might
00:52:42
surprise you to hear that the producers
00:52:44
think this could actually increase jobs.
00:52:46
We'll get to that. And by the way, what
00:52:48
you're looking at right now and
00:52:49
throughout this video I created using
00:52:51
the latest tools just to help illustrate
00:52:53
how this process works. These are not
00:52:55
clips from the movie.
00:52:57
>> So I spoke to the producers behind the
00:52:58
film, Ryan and Matt Kavanagh. They're
00:53:00
the founders of Acme AI. They told me
00:53:03
the company already has 10 films and two
00:53:05
TV series in some stage of production
00:53:08
right now using
00:53:09
>> right
00:53:10
>> um
00:53:11
>> I think
00:53:13
>> because the actors are the noisiest
00:53:15
about being replaced
00:53:17
>> but the behind the scenes people getting
00:53:19
replaced is important too like set
00:53:22
dressing and
00:53:24
>> you know building set designers building
00:53:27
grips all all that tech hardware type
00:53:32
electricians and the the
00:53:34
>> I mean I guess you need lighting for
00:53:37
for Pete and Casey. Um
00:53:41
>> there's been
00:53:42
>> that shouldn't cost 70 million. It
00:53:44
should cost
00:53:44
>> I didn't get the 70 million thing. What
00:53:46
was that? I mean why would it be?
00:53:47
>> Well, they said it could have cost 300.
00:53:49
>> Oh, if you did it.
00:53:51
>> No, it was going to cost 300 and
00:53:53
>> but it's still 70. Okay.
00:53:55
>> 70 is way more than any movie maybe I've
00:53:57
ever done. You know, look, there's been
00:54:00
ancence
00:54:02
of this for at least 20 years with CGI.
00:54:05
There's a show on HBO, The Gilded Age,
00:54:09
and you can tell the whole town and all
00:54:11
the people walking is just
00:54:13
>> I guess a AI, but it's, you know, it's
00:54:15
it's been around a little while.
00:54:17
>> So, it's just a process like the
00:54:19
background extras are definitely
00:54:21
generated characters. You can see
00:54:23
>> see another group that gets shafted.
00:54:26
Extras. They'll just be in
00:54:28
>> Extras are important.
00:54:30
>> Yep.
00:54:30
>> Atmosphere people, they're the glue in
00:54:33
these things. Make it look real.
00:54:36
>> You get good atmosphere extras. And uh
00:54:39
it really helps the scene. I
00:54:40
>> I don't know how you negotiate this, but
00:54:42
I was reading this morning that the long
00:54:44
shoreman negotiated a thing where no
00:54:46
automation, no AI, we're just gonna lift
00:54:49
stuff with manly hands and stuff. And
00:54:51
Trump was supporting that.
00:54:54
>> Don't get cute. You got to go, you know.
00:54:57
But I don't know how you put the genie
00:54:59
back in the bottle without Barbara Eden
00:55:02
helping you.
00:55:02
>> It's hard to put the cat [ __ ] back in
00:55:04
the cat, you know.
00:55:06
>> Did you understand my Barbara Eden
00:55:07
reference?
00:55:08
>> You did?
00:55:09
>> Of course I did. I was in love with her.
00:55:10
>> Would you say would you tell the
00:55:11
audience who that is?
00:55:12
>> She's the babe that lives in the bottle.
00:55:14
She's Genie
00:55:15
>> from No, that's from the
00:55:16
>> I was more in love with Bewitched is
00:55:18
shockingly
00:55:20
>> Elizabeth Warren in the 19 is that No,
00:55:22
it was Elizabeth Montgomery. Sorry.
00:55:24
>> Gorgeous. Uh, that's that was the first
00:55:27
probably television sitcom woman that
00:55:30
sort of got my attention.
00:55:32
>> I'm getting tingly in my underpants.
00:55:34
>> I feel funny like when I used to climb
00:55:37
the rope in gym class.
00:55:39
>> [ __ ] G was the horniest.
00:55:44
>> All right. Well, that's probably a good
00:55:45
full
00:55:46
>> That's a full,
00:55:47
>> you know, like 10 out of 10 show. Yeah,
00:55:49
>> that's a We didn't get cute. We never
00:55:51
got cute. And we made a deal.
00:55:53
We showed a lot of clips and we had we
00:55:57
had uh 19 impressions in our little
00:56:00
sketch.
00:56:01
>> This is the following after the second
00:56:04
weekend of Bus, but the first weekend we
00:56:05
got in the top 10. First, it was the
00:56:08
only independent movie in the top 10.
00:56:09
So, that's good something.
00:56:11
>> Well, by the way, two things. One is I
00:56:13
was I was pleasantly surprised you got
00:56:15
it initially on 800 screens. And you
00:56:18
look at the metric of average per
00:56:20
screen, you were way up there. 2,000 per
00:56:23
screen.
00:56:24
>> Thank you. And these are like we don't
00:56:25
ask. We say we got in 200, we got 250.
00:56:28
Then Regal will call. We're adding 150.
00:56:30
We're like, oh, thanks. And then they're
00:56:31
like, hey, Australia wants it now, so
00:56:34
we're going to send it to Australia.
00:56:36
Hey, Canada and the UK. So now we're
00:56:38
Canada, UK, New Zealand's coming up. So,
00:56:41
it'll go on this wave and then when it
00:56:44
comes out on, you know, where you can
00:56:46
buy it at home, video on demand, then
00:56:48
it'll at least have more awareness. But
00:56:50
I have shockingly gotten nice feedback
00:56:52
from it. So, because people on Twitter
00:56:55
love to hate and it's probably way more
00:56:58
positive, shocking. But someone did give
00:57:00
me an F minus and I was like, can we
00:57:03
just leave it at F? I mean, let's not
00:57:05
get so dramatic. If they gave Apocalypse
00:57:08
Now an F minus, you know,
00:57:10
>> F minus. No one's got that. I said just
00:57:13
go all the way down to G. If you're
00:57:14
going to go that low, then people think
00:57:16
it's good.
00:57:18
>> Yeah. How about not seeing the movie if
00:57:21
No, look, I think people have to
00:57:24
understand that big corporate movies,
00:57:26
not we've been in them, not to pick on
00:57:28
them, they have a distribution deal and
00:57:30
that company is just pushing the movie
00:57:33
and negotiating all these things. You
00:57:36
guys are the little engine that could
00:57:38
the homemade product bought and paid for
00:57:41
lowbudget but I the thing about it it's
00:57:44
it's potently what it is. It's an
00:57:46
R-rated kind of polit, you know, sort of
00:57:49
throwback fun simple movie. Two two kind
00:57:53
of I don't know what you call them. Just
00:57:56
>> down on your luck
00:57:57
>> underdogs.
00:57:58
>> Underdog
00:57:58
>> and all the misadventures and and the
00:58:01
silliness which I love the they just
00:58:03
they just want to be waiters and their
00:58:05
lives would be great.
00:58:06
>> The wispiest premise. Yeah. They fall
00:58:09
down in the dirt a lot.
00:58:11
>> They fall down in the work. Yeah.
00:58:13
Lauren.
00:58:15
Well, anyway, so excited about that and
00:58:18
uh I will see you next time and come see
00:58:20
us at the Oreium if you're in LA.
00:58:22
>> Yeah, don't be don't be nervous about
00:58:24
seeing us. We're going to bring it.
00:58:26
>> Yeah, bring it with Chris.
00:58:28
>> And rock's always on fire.
00:58:30
>> Thanks everybody. Bye-bye.
00:58:32
>> Bye-bye now.
00:58:38
>> Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast,
00:58:40
which you are, be sure to click follow
00:58:42
on your favorite podcast app. Give us a
00:58:44
review, fivestar rating, and maybe even
00:58:47
share an episode that you've loved with
00:58:49
a friend.
00:58:49
>> If you're watching this episode on
00:58:51
YouTube, please subscribe. We're on
00:58:53
video now.
00:58:54
>> Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey,
00:58:56
an executive produced by Danny Carvey
00:58:58
and David Spade, Heather Santoro, and
00:59:00
Greg Holtzman, Mattie Sprung Kaiser, and
00:59:03
Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey. Our senior
00:59:06
producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show
00:59:07
is produced and edited by Phil Sweet
00:59:10
Tech. Booking by Cultivated
00:59:12
Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick
00:59:15
Fogerty, Evan Cox, Mora Curran, Melissa
00:59:19
Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly,
00:59:23
Colin Gainner, Sean Cherry, Kurt
00:59:26
Courtourtney, and Lauren Vieiraa. Reach
00:59:28
out with us any questions be asked and
00:59:30
answered on the show. You can email us
00:59:32
at fly onthealla.com.
00:59:36
That's audacy.com.

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