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Robbie Magasiva Opens Up on Loss of Pua Magasiva

March 15, 202601:37:33
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What was it about yourself that you saw
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that you didn't like?
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>> I lost my ex-wife to ego.
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>> May 11, 2019. What are you What are your
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memories of that day?
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>> 3:00 in the morning, I get a call from
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poor twin. Didn't answer it. And he
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called again. Didn't answer it. Third
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time I answered it and he said, "Who's
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just passed?" Didn't register that. I
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said, "What?" Said poor poor passed away
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on the flooring my eyes just like angry.
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It was during co I lost my [ __ ] and I
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just hit the table and stormed out of
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there and I was just pissed off of
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myself. When you say ego, were you
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unfaithful at the time?
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>> Yeah, very much so.
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>> You're not as the hunky actor.
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>> Seeing this woman just all that gone,
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you know, just watching TV and I know I,
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you know, I know she was lost in there.
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It's just like every time I do look at
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her, it's just Yeah, it it it breaks my
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heart.
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>> What do you think happens when you die?
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>> But to answer your question, when he
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asked me a question, are you happy
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yourself? I was like, yes, I am
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actually.
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>> Oh, good. You're here. Come on. This is
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the center of performance. Whenever
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there's a top performance in New
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Zealand, it all comes from here. That's
00:00:57
Lisa Carrington. She's been doing that
00:00:59
for days. That's the boys who got the
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hole in one in two.
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He did it again. Hey Finn, how's the
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performance going?
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>> Top tier.
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>> Nice. This is our generate room. In
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here, you'll find our top performers
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helping Kiwis maximize their Kiwi Saver
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investments. Get in here, Finn.
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Maximize. Generate.
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>> Putting performance first.
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>> Robbie Manga. Hi, Dom. Hi, Dom Harvey.
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Finally. Finally. I wore you down.
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trying to think how hold how long ago I
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got a first DM for a be broke do you
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want to be in go cuz oh no I'm not
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interested and then back in the country
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said he's here he's here so I'm here
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>> I appreciate it you said in the office
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just a second ago you're nervous why are
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you nervous
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>> dude I'm always nervous well like I said
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to you at um before I said this is
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you're my second podcast I don't often
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do it and mainly because I find myself
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really boring cuz the first one I did
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was mandate and again I said to the boys
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both I um yeah I've got nothing to talk
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about but it's as we got into it things
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started to come out I started to open up
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which was really
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>> it really hit a a few people actually
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that mandate one with me so I thought
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okay
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>> did you get yourself in trouble no or do
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people agree with I I listened to that
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the other day I've been on the mandate
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podcast as well they do they do a great
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job um it was very thorough like a 2 and
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a half hour chat that you had with them
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um and there were like a lot of things
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that that you said like talking about
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how proud you are of being a man. And I
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thought, "Oo, to a lot of people, this
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could be a hot take."
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>> Well, I thought that when I said it at
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the time, you know, but I didn't get any
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grief about that, you know. I I just
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kind of owned it, you know. I wasn't
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>> that's where I I'm I still, you know,
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I'm I'm a proud man kind of thing. And
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but I'm also uh it doesn't mean I'm a
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sexist or anything. I understand where
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people are and I accept that. But
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>> as if you ask me who I am, this is who I
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am as a man
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>> and I'm proud to wear that badge.
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>> Well, I I you appreciated the um
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authenticity. Like you agreed to come on
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my podcast before I'd heard the mandate
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one. And after hearing the mandate one,
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I thought, "Oh, this podcast is going to
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be great cuz um Robbie is
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unapologetically himself. Um and he's at
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a age and stage in his life where he
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doesn't give a [ __ ] about what he says.
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He speaks his truth."
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>> Yeah. Well, let's hope. Let's hope.
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>> So, you're back just to time stamp this.
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We're recording this over the um the
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summer break uh 2025/2026.
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And you're living in LA at the moment,
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so you're back here for a limited time
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only.
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>> No. Yeah. Well, I kind of moved over I
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moved over in end of 2023
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um cuz my kids my kids uh both of them
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live in Melbourne. Uh one is in uh
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France at the moment uh making her way
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back to to Melbourne. And I thought I've
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got nothing else. And it was also a
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period of my life that I kind of needed
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to leave. You know, I think when that
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podcast when mandate happened, I was in
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a period of my life where [ __ ] was
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happening to me. And then the back and I
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just come out of that end of 2023 and I
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thought, no, in my heart said I need to
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I I need to leave here. I'm I I think I
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need to be away so then I can appreciate
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this, you know, being here again.
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because I had no appreciation for it and
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mainly all the [ __ ] that happened to me
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leading up to that.
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>> What was happening to you?
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>> Oh, dude. Uh it was a relationship
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thing. Um all that stuff, but um
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>> you know uh I Yeah, that's yeah, buried
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now in the past and we we move on.
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>> Okay.
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>> Yeah, there's a quote from you in the um
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the Christ Church Press in March 2024.
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>> Oh [ __ ] what did I say? Um, and I
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wonder if this um I bring this up cuz I
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wonder if it brings if if it's connected
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to the what you're talking about, the
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[ __ ] happening to you,
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>> man. The last 3 years have been a
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struggle. I had to sell sell all my
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[ __ ]
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>> I had to sell my car and some of my
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bikes just to make ends meet.
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>> I was just watching that bank account go
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down and down and people have this
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perception of, oh man, you're an actor,
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you're rich. Far from it.
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>> Is that connected to Was it like a
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career slump as well?
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>> It was a career slump as well. Like
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everything happened at once. my uh my
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relationship ending um and then just not
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having work work for about a year. Yeah,
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I mean I was getting bits and and and
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bobs and all I'd accumulated. I mean I I
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love my toys and I bought that when the
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back end of having nine season on
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Wentworth, you know, but then the
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reality hit when Wentworth finished and
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then there was just no work for about 2
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years which is like and then having
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luckily I had that those to sell so I
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can you know make ends meet. And it was
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just like it was funny though because
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being in the being in that dark place or
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where where everything where [ __ ]
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happens.
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>> I I I which I think I said on the
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podcast I learned a lot about myself
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>> and now I'm prepped for it. Like this
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year now I've only worked once but I
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know I'm careful with my money cuz I was
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terrible with my money. I've got people
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that look after my money now and it's
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working for me. So now I can even though
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I'm not working and I get anxiety about
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not working, I know that I'm okay. I'm
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going to be okay for a a few years. All
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I need to do now is get a job next year
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so I can fill up the bank.
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>> Um yeah, I mean it builds character. It
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builds resilience adversity and going
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through the stuff. But [ __ ] it's never
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fun at the time.
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>> No, it sucks.
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>> It sucks. It sucks. But I came, you
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know, but that I'm proud. You look I I
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have to say I'm proud of myself. from
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coming going going going through that
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cuz you know you hear horrible stories
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about people getting there and not
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having the support or not having a way
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to deal with that and you know they end
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up choosing a road that I would never
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yeah you know
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>> um
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>> how how you may not want to answer this
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and like there's no um stitchups or
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gotchas here so you don't have to answer
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anything or whatever but so you're on
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the show Wentworth for like nine season
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100 episodes or something your your core
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cast you must have been earning good
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Right.
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>> It was okay.
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>> Yeah.
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>> Well, when I first when we when I first
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uh landed that role, um compared to what
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I was earning here, it was big money. It
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was big. It was well I I pro it wasn't
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as big as some of the um what the the
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women were getting because they well
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known in Australia. I was just this
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little Kiwi that I happened to to have
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landed the role. So it generally I mean
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as a season went on I think I got a slow
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raise but it was never um it was good
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money but it wasn't anywhere near what
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the the women were getting. Yeah. Yeah.
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>> Um I believe around this time you
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thought about quitting. I I heard um a
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couple of different interviews. One you
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said you talked about becoming a
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firefighter. Another one I heard you
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talk about becoming a personal trainer.
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How how close were you actually to
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>> well the back the the last season of
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Wentworth it was during co
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and I was away I was away from I was
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away from my family for a few months
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because I couldn't leave the country
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they they well actually when wouldn't
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allow me to leave because of the
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restriction they were nervous that I
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wouldn't wasn't able to get back into
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the country to finish the season so I
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end up being stuck there for about 6
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months I think it was away from my
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family. And then there was a thing that
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happened on set. I turned up to set and
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I did this scene and I remember learning
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my lines leading up to that to that
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scene. There was one line I just
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couldn't get. I just couldn't get. And I
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left home, went on set, and I knew
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inside me goes, "Fuck, I'm not I'm not
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going to get this." Anyway, we come to
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that scene. Sure enough, didn't hit it.
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Stuffed up my line. We had ended up
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doing about 15 takes and that's a lot
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for a fast run. And I got to a point
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that I got lost my [ __ ] and I just hit
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the table and stormed out of there. And
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I was just pissed off with myself. And I
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know uh the first ad was a good mate of
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mine. He just looked at me goes, "Bro,
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just do look just get as much out and
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then they can edit." So why did that
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after I walked away from that and I said
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to myself, "No, I don't want to do this
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[ __ ] again." I had anxiety turning up to
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set from then on and I think we had a
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few week probably a month left of shoot.
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I was anxious every time I got up and
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never happened to me before. And I got
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anxious turning up to see. I got anxious
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about learning lines and stuffing up my
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lines. And then by the end of that, I
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left. I came home. When I finally did
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come home, I said, "N stuff this. I
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don't want to do this anymore." And I
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rang my agent, my Australian agent. I
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said, "Look, I don't want to do this
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anymore." And she said to me, "Look,
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take the rest of the year off, right?
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And then we can have this conversation
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at the end of the year if you want. If
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that's what you want to stick with."
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Yep. then I and then I accept and I
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respect that but if not then we continue
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this journey but you look after yourself
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work on yourself take a break away and I
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think 8 months I did that and
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so during that 8 months I explored being
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a firefighter I whether what what the
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options are that or PT I didn't have any
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qualifications I left school I only
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qualified in acting and rugby so the end
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of that I'd done all the work I needed
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to do And then yeah, she said, "Okay,
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let's let's do that again."
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>> And then she started slowly introduc um
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getting me little jobs just to,
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>> you know, Yeah. ease you back into it.
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>> Well, that moment on Wentworth with um
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the line that you couldn't get right.
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What was that about? It wasn't about the
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line, was it? Like you you've been
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acting your entire adult life.
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>> Exactly. It was I think it was just just
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the back end of Wetworth. I did not
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enjoy. The last two season, the last
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season of Wentworth, I didn't enjoy
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actually. I gotten to a point where I I
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just didn't enjoy going to work. I
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enjoyed seeing the people, but I just
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didn't enjoy it. I didn't know I didn't
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like the way my character where they
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wrote my character, the the arc that
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they had, you know, cuz I'd turn up
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every season, they said, "You're going
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to do this, this, and this." And it
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would never happen. So, by the end of
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it, I was just like, I'm over it. I
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don't want to do this anymore. So it was
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a combination of that a com uh also
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being away from my family for 6 months
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not not knowing not allowing to to
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leave. Uh and then that event there was
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just
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it's where you know it kind of exploded
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and I said no stuff this I don't want to
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do this.
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>> Wonder if yeah the um co lockdowns had
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something to do with it. Melbourne was
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the worst city in the world to be locked
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down, right?
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>> It was like the longest city in the
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world
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>> cuz the thing is in in in Australia, you
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couldn't go, you know, here you were
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allowed to go outside, right, and get
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some fresh air. In Australia, you
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weren't they weren't given that time.
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They were stuck in their hotel room or
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wherever. The whole time they were
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there,
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>> it was full on. But I remember we also
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had Zoom meet cuz everyone was in in
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quarantine at that time. I was in
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Hamilton. Some people were in in Sydney
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somewhere. But we would have Zooms. That
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Zoom was really popular back then.
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>> Mhm.
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>> I have anxiety about that about co
00:11:53
>> So do I,
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>> dude.
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>> So do I. If there's ever um an
00:11:57
opportunity to do a remote podcast, I
00:11:58
sort of turn it down cuz it just I don't
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know. I find it it just reminds me of
00:12:02
like a co thing.
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>> Yeah. Like I' I've my parents are here
00:12:05
at the moment and we and I got a Airbnb
00:12:08
in town and I thought it was a
00:12:11
threebedroom, but it was a two-bedroom.
00:12:13
So it was me, mom and dad. mom and dad
00:12:15
and myself and my sister and I got so
00:12:18
claustrophobic and and it remind it took
00:12:20
me back to to quarantine time. I was
00:12:22
like I hate this. I hate this. At the
00:12:24
time we just survived, you know, as
00:12:25
humans we survive.
00:12:26
>> But back then I was like I never want to
00:12:28
go through that [ __ ] again.
00:12:30
>> Never.
00:12:31
>> Jeez, the podcast is already off to a
00:12:33
great start. That's it's some it's some
00:12:34
it's some real um honesty and some
00:12:36
vulnerability early on. I promise it's
00:12:38
not going to be all bleak. There's going
00:12:39
to be some fun stuff.
00:12:40
>> I like bleak. Hit me with bleak.
00:12:42
>> Okay. Okay. Well, I've got another quote
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from you from that same article in the
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press, March 2024.
00:12:48
When I went to that place, I saw stuff
00:12:49
about myself that I didn't like, but I
00:12:51
don't think that I would have healed
00:12:53
properly if I hadn't gone through that
00:12:54
tough time.
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What was it about yourself that you saw
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that you didn't like?
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>> A lot of it had to do with ego.
00:13:03
Um
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uh yeah, for a long I I I mean I I'll
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I'll be as honest as my ego uh I lost uh
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I lost my ex-wife
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to ego.
00:13:18
>> Um
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>> you've only been married once.
00:13:20
>> I've only been married once and that was
00:13:22
a few years ago.
00:13:23
>> But ego ruined that relationship for a
00:13:26
long time. I it was just it was just
00:13:28
ego. But also not seeing, not being able
00:13:31
to see cuz you see stuff when you're in
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when you're when you're when you're that
00:13:35
low, which cuz I think the rest of the
00:13:38
you the rest of the world just covers
00:13:40
everything.
00:13:41
>> I'm not making any sense here. But at
00:13:43
the time, I just didn't see [ __ ] about
00:13:45
myself. And when you're that deep in
00:13:47
depression and it's like, oh, okay,
00:13:49
there it is. You know, but a lot of it
00:13:51
had to do with with my ego.
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>> That's some good self-reflection. Yeah,
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>> I think when we get to our 50s, you can
00:13:59
you can acknledge.
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>> I can I and I think I've always been
00:14:02
honest with with stuff. Even I surprised
00:14:04
myself on that and that the that other
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podcast and how much it did come out,
00:14:08
you know. I think at that time as well,
00:14:10
it need I just needed an outlet.
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>> So, it surprised me when we started
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talking and stuff were just coming out
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and I said, "Oh, okay."
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>> It's like pulling a thread of
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>> Yeah. Yeah. When now I'm in the period
00:14:23
of my life where I'm I'm I'm really
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good.
00:14:25
>> Mhm. you know, work has dried up a
00:14:27
little bit, but that's to expected the
00:14:29
the career that I've chosen.
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>> But other than that, my my kids are
00:14:32
healthy.
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>> I enjoy life. I love being here. I love
00:14:36
living in the States, you know,
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>> and um so life is good. Touchwood.
00:14:42
>> Yeah. Um so you um your ex-wife, has she
00:14:45
forgiven you or more importantly, have
00:14:47
you forgiven yourself?
00:14:48
>> I've forgiven myself. Yeah, I did. I
00:14:50
did. Um
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>> I did. I mean, yeah, I did apologize. I
00:14:55
did say to her, "I'm sorry for the way I
00:14:57
was or the way I treated you um very
00:15:01
early on uh after we we broke up." Um
00:15:04
and we still stay well. I don't keep in
00:15:06
contact as much uh anymore. She actually
00:15:08
used to work at up there. Uh what's it
00:15:11
what's the
00:15:12
>> Oh, Media Works.
00:15:12
>> Media Work. She used to work up there.
00:15:14
>> So, every time I did come up, she
00:15:16
doesn't work there anymore, but every
00:15:17
time I do come up, I text and see if
00:15:19
she's around for coffee.
00:15:20
>> Um but yeah.
00:15:21
>> Oh, that's nice.
00:15:22
>> Yeah. Yeah. But she's moved on. She's
00:15:24
better out without me.
00:15:25
>> Were you when you say ego, were you
00:15:26
unfaithful at the time?
00:15:27
>> Yeah. Yeah, very much so.
00:15:28
>> I think you got to cut yourself some
00:15:30
slack. I was I was thinking about this
00:15:31
on I went for a run this morning and I
00:15:33
was thinking about this. It's like um
00:15:35
your good looks, it's probably a
00:15:37
blessing and a curse. Like me. I've I've
00:15:39
never had an issue with that because uh
00:15:41
you know what? I don't consider myself
00:15:43
good-looking. It's bizarre.
00:15:45
>> Come on. You're not as the hunky actor.
00:15:47
I'm an old guy. I'm an old fart now. No,
00:15:50
I mean it it has helped in my career,
00:15:53
but there are days, seriously, there are
00:15:55
days like I look at like I at the moment
00:15:58
I've kind of let myself go a little bit
00:16:00
cuz since I've been here, all I've eaten
00:16:02
is fish and chips and mints and cheese
00:16:04
pie cuz you I can't get them over there.
00:16:06
But I there there are times I I mean I
00:16:10
do look at myself and goes, "Oh my god,
00:16:11
seriously, what do people see in that?"
00:16:13
M
00:16:14
>> but you know there's that there's that
00:16:15
saying I think it's kind of a kind of a
00:16:17
punchline that you know a man is only as
00:16:19
faithful as his options and it you peak
00:16:22
Robbie Mangvera like there would have
00:16:23
been unlimited options it would I'm not
00:16:25
excusing I'm not excusing your poor
00:16:27
behavior
00:16:28
>> no I'm not excusing but yeah it's
00:16:30
surprising I was surprised by that too
00:16:33
>> so what does life look like in LA now
00:16:35
where do you live are you Silver Lake
00:16:37
>> I'm near Silver Lake I'm in Ktown career
00:16:39
town
00:16:39
>> you enjoy it
00:16:40
>> love it surprised me it really surprised
00:16:43
me. Um
00:16:46
uh because my my partner I actually met
00:16:49
my partner on the show that I did and so
00:16:53
one of the other main reasons for me
00:16:54
moving over there was because of it. It
00:16:56
was just great timing.
00:16:57
>> Is this the show Rescue High Surf?
00:16:59
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So at the time when
00:17:00
she worked it was it was a pilot called
00:17:02
Kenoi Road
00:17:03
>> for HBO. So that HBO didn't pick it up.
00:17:07
So there was a a lal and then the
00:17:10
production shopped it out and that's
00:17:13
when Fox came on and then turned it into
00:17:15
Rescue High Surf but I met my current
00:17:17
partner on Canoi Road.
00:17:20
>> So and we did the long distance things
00:17:22
for 2 years
00:17:24
and uh and then 2023 I moved over when
00:17:28
um yeah before before 20 yeah before
00:17:32
rescue
00:17:33
>> and I love it. I was surprised by that.
00:17:35
But I think what it is, why I love it is
00:17:37
because she's taken away the guessing
00:17:38
game because I remember flying into LA
00:17:41
so you know the amount of times I have
00:17:43
flown into LA and you said it's so [ __ ]
00:17:46
vast.
00:17:47
>> It's massive.
00:17:48
>> It's massive and it's it's it's it
00:17:50
freaks me out every time. But now I look
00:17:52
down go that's home. That's that's home
00:17:54
for me. And it was just recently that I
00:17:55
started calling LA home
00:17:57
>> because for a long time I just called
00:17:59
>> um uh NZ home.
00:18:01
Do you is there a Kiwi contingent there
00:18:03
that you
00:18:04
>> There is there's uh Frankie Adams. She
00:18:06
lives in Silver Lake. And then there's
00:18:09
Ra and Grace Palmer who live in Los.
00:18:14
Um that's and that's that's it. And then
00:18:17
I've got another friend Tongen uh Tongen
00:18:20
actor Ulie. He lives in the in the
00:18:23
valley. So they are that's all I want. I
00:18:26
don't want any more Kiwis in that. Oh,
00:18:27
and um um my mate uh Vanessa uh Kada,
00:18:31
she's been there for a few years. She's
00:18:32
a st auntie.
00:18:34
>> So that's about it really.
00:18:36
>> That's wonderful.
00:18:37
>> Yeah.
00:18:38
>> All right. Should we go back to the
00:18:39
early years?
00:18:39
>> Let's do it.
00:18:40
>> Yeah. Should we?
00:18:41
>> Yeah.
00:18:41
>> Okay. So May 21st, 1972.
00:18:44
>> Yeah. Came into the world.
00:18:46
>> So you're born in Wellington.
00:18:47
>> Born in Wally.
00:18:48
>> There for 5 years. And then you moved
00:18:50
back to Sour. Yeah.
00:18:52
>> And then back to New Zealand when you
00:18:53
were about 10.
00:18:54
>> Yeah. Yeah.
00:18:55
>> Why? Dad.
00:18:57
>> Okay.
00:18:57
>> Uh, dad was offered a job as a bank
00:18:59
manager over there. I think so. I hope I
00:19:02
think dad will be watching this. Correct
00:19:04
me, but I'm going to say bank manager.
00:19:06
So, we went back. And also, I think
00:19:09
God, I should have checked with dad
00:19:10
about this. Um, also, dad had this uh uh
00:19:14
had asthma, so it was he was really
00:19:17
affected by the climate here. So,
00:19:18
possibly that was one of the reasons we
00:19:20
left, but I know that he got a a job
00:19:22
back there and he wanted to go home. So,
00:19:24
we all went back.
00:19:25
>> M. Wow. Me, Steve, Mickey, and then the
00:19:29
twins came later. Yeah. During there,
00:19:32
>> that must have been a weird time. So,
00:19:33
you you're born in New Zealand 5 years.
00:19:35
What memories do you have of those first
00:19:36
five years?
00:19:37
>> My memory Well, cuz I born here,
00:19:41
first language was English. We went over
00:19:45
to Sam Moore and my fondest memory of
00:19:49
was uh just living in a shack was
00:19:53
basically a shack because what had
00:19:55
happened was dad got given a little bit
00:19:56
of land um in in Up which is to a place
00:20:00
called Tapur which is what poor's um
00:20:03
named after.
00:20:06
So there was nothing it was just bush.
00:20:07
So dad built this little shack, but I
00:20:09
remember it was just like, you know, um
00:20:11
it was just candle and us around,
00:20:15
you know, it was just um this freaking
00:20:17
simple shack that dad built just so we
00:20:19
can live there. And then throughout the
00:20:21
throughout the years, he just worked on
00:20:22
the land and planted uh cocoa,
00:20:26
but our Yeah. Yeah. And also uh walking
00:20:30
to school. So we used our house used to
00:20:33
be out out the place called Tanapur and
00:20:36
we used to walk to the nearest bus stop
00:20:39
was probably about a 40 to 45 minute
00:20:42
walk catch the bus go to school come
00:20:45
back and then
00:20:47
at it again but when I left there I lost
00:20:50
the English and I was fluent in Sour. So
00:20:56
>> yeah. What was that like coming back to
00:20:57
New Zealand at 10? That must have been
00:20:58
quite the culture shock.
00:21:01
I was teased a lot.
00:21:05
But
00:21:06
but you know what I do remember was um
00:21:09
when we got off the plane the
00:21:10
escalators.
00:21:12
I've never seen an escalator before.
00:21:15
And I went
00:21:18
I go, "Wow, what is this
00:21:21
>> magic staircase?
00:21:22
>> It's magic staircase."
00:21:24
I just it took it took me a while to get
00:21:26
on it, but once I was on it, it was like
00:21:30
whoa,
00:21:31
>> what the hell?
00:21:32
>> But I hadn't. So, we came back here. We
00:21:34
spent a little bit of time in
00:21:35
Oakuckland. And then we moved down to
00:21:37
Wellington, and we stayed with my
00:21:38
cousins
00:21:39
>> and we shared the house with them. They
00:21:41
had a three-bedroom place, three-bedroom
00:21:43
place, and there was four of them and
00:21:45
five of us. So, all the boys about two
00:21:49
two of the eldest were in one room, and
00:21:51
then all the rest of the boys would be
00:21:52
in one room. and and then mom and dad
00:21:55
and one. Yeah. But it was
00:22:00
I the the throughout the time my cousin
00:22:02
my actually my best mate as well um was
00:22:04
the one that actually slowly taught me
00:22:06
how to speak English kind of thing
00:22:08
>> but it came back again because of that
00:22:10
memory thing.
00:22:11
>> Muscle memory.
00:22:12
>> Yeah. Muscle memory.
00:22:13
>> Um and is this when you were embarrassed
00:22:15
about your nose and you wanted like a
00:22:16
skinny pangy nose?
00:22:19
>> Yeah.
00:22:19
>> Yeah.
00:22:20
>> It's terrible. That's really [ __ ]
00:22:21
sad.
00:22:21
>> That's [ __ ] up. Hey, sorry. Am I
00:22:23
allowed to swear?
00:22:24
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But when when when you
00:22:26
when you when you hear that or you Yeah.
00:22:29
think back to that, does it does it make
00:22:30
you sense
00:22:31
>> coming to school? Yeah. Hell yeah.
00:22:33
>> Yeah.
00:22:34
>> Hell yeah. Cuz I going to school cuz I
00:22:37
was also also getting teased, you know,
00:22:40
and there's I what at the time I didn't
00:22:42
think it was racism, but it was. And
00:22:44
then thinking back and go, [ __ ] that is
00:22:46
that that is quite full. But I remember
00:22:49
just the kids as I was looking all those
00:22:51
Balangi kids and all this perfect pointy
00:22:53
nose and I remember used to be in the
00:22:55
mirror just going like this. How do I
00:22:57
make my nose that pointy
00:22:59
>> for for for a long time?
00:23:02
>> It's sad.
00:23:03
>> Yeah. I just And then Yeah.
00:23:05
>> And your your parents are still alive.
00:23:07
They're they're in New Zealand at the
00:23:08
moment, but they they're sour based.
00:23:10
>> Yeah, they are sore based. Mom and dad
00:23:12
always wanted to go back to Sour when
00:23:13
their kids grew up and stuff like that.
00:23:15
So they now live in Sammore full-time.
00:23:17
They're currently here at the moment for
00:23:19
health reasons. So I uh if if that gets
00:23:23
cleared, they'll go back to
00:23:24
>> Samour.
00:23:26
>> Uh and uh yeah, at the moment I'm I'm
00:23:30
dealing with the family is dealing with
00:23:33
mom's dementia.
00:23:35
>> Um
00:23:36
>> so that's been tough. That's been tough.
00:23:38
But this time, this time around here, I
00:23:40
came back to give my brother uh who
00:23:42
lives up in Lee and uh who has been uh
00:23:45
her and um him and his partner have been
00:23:46
absolutely fantastic in terms of looking
00:23:48
after mom. But our my hero is my sister
00:23:52
who decided to um give up her work just
00:23:56
to look after mom and dad full-time. And
00:23:58
it's yeah, it's been a it's been a
00:24:00
godsend.
00:24:01
>> So, she's been amazing. So, mom and dad
00:24:04
are is here at the moment. He said has
00:24:05
had surgery had infection in his
00:24:08
prostate. So that's all should be
00:24:10
cleared. So one day clear they go back.
00:24:12
But mom at the moment Yeah. We're just
00:24:14
going through that man. It's it's it's
00:24:16
tough to see my
00:24:18
>> I call her my superhero. She's my
00:24:19
superhero.
00:24:20
>> Yeah. I've got that got that written
00:24:21
down here. Yeah. So she was Yeah. Yeah.
00:24:23
Tell us about your mom. So she's a
00:24:24
cleaner. She was a cleaner.
00:24:25
>> She was a cleaner for a very long time.
00:24:26
>> When was the last time you had uh some
00:24:28
of her chicken curry?
00:24:30
>> A long time really
00:24:31
>> that she cooked cuz she can't remember
00:24:33
how to cook it now. It was a very long
00:24:35
time ago I had it probably about
00:24:38
um
00:24:40
yeah probably go about six years ago,
00:24:42
six or seven years ago I last had her.
00:24:44
>> Oh, she really no good now.
00:24:46
>> Um she she knows who we are but uh her
00:24:50
long short-term memory is gone. Like you
00:24:52
tell her one thing. I mean, you know,
00:24:54
you tell her something and she'd be gone
00:24:56
like that.
00:24:56
>> How old is she?
00:24:57
>> She's young, too. She's
00:24:59
>> I'm sorry, Mom. Sorry, Dad. Uh 74. 75.
00:25:03
Yeah,
00:25:04
>> that is young on the big SK.
00:25:05
>> That is young. Yeah.
00:25:06
>> And she's tough too. She's strong and
00:25:09
that's a and that's the the depressing
00:25:11
thing is she's still apart from the
00:25:13
arthritis she's yet and keeping she's
00:25:14
strong,
00:25:15
>> you know, physically stronger. Dad is a
00:25:17
little bit more frail.
00:25:20
But he he he he will get there. But
00:25:22
yeah, it's just that's that's being
00:25:25
around that has been tough. It's been
00:25:27
really really tough. just I mean there
00:25:29
were time like there were there were
00:25:32
times that I'll be just sitting there
00:25:33
she'll be there and I know she's not
00:25:36
she's not there. M
00:25:40
>> so um seeing this woman that was just
00:25:44
fearless um funny um caring loving
00:25:49
just all that gone you know I I um I'm
00:25:53
I'm very much like my mom and and I was
00:25:56
just watching her just watching TV and I
00:25:58
know I you know I know she was lost in
00:26:00
there it's just like every time I do
00:26:02
look at her it's just yeah it it breaks
00:26:05
my heart but
00:26:08
you know, I I'm I'm I'm grateful that
00:26:12
she still knows who I am. She still
00:26:14
knows who my brothers are, my sister,
00:26:16
dad.
00:26:17
Um, you know, so I'm grateful for that.
00:26:21
And I hope, you know, I hope she's that,
00:26:23
you know, to the the day she leaves, she
00:26:25
still remembers who we are.
00:26:27
>> So, yeah, it's been tough. It's been
00:26:29
tough. And then, you know, even tougher
00:26:31
when [ __ ] we went to look at a home,
00:26:32
possible home for her. That was first
00:26:35
time I've been in a home. [ __ ]
00:26:38
Heartbreaking, man. Just seems
00:26:40
>> cuz it represents the loss of
00:26:41
independence.
00:26:42
>> Independence. But even the people that
00:26:43
were in there, you know, that was just
00:26:45
cuz it was a
00:26:46
>> Yeah. You're going there, you're going
00:26:47
there to die, aren't you? It's
00:26:49
>> Yeah. And it was just like, oh [ __ ] And
00:26:51
I just watching these people just sit
00:26:53
there watching these, you know, people
00:26:56
who had lives and just sitting there.
00:27:00
That's their day. just sitting there,
00:27:02
you know, and and you know, and the
00:27:05
reality is it, you know,
00:27:09
>> we they need that, you know, they they
00:27:11
they need that otherwise, but it was
00:27:13
just Yeah, it was uh it was definitely
00:27:16
it was definitely Yeah, definitely. So,
00:27:19
>> um did you get have you got the chance
00:27:21
to have all the conversations with your
00:27:23
mom that you needed to and say the
00:27:24
things you needed to while she was still
00:27:26
able to comprehend? Um, I mean I've I've
00:27:29
heard you talk about her like on on
00:27:30
other podcasts and read some interviews
00:27:32
and you speak.
00:27:33
>> I no
00:27:36
>> uh I think probably
00:27:40
uh probably leading uh probably 2018 was
00:27:44
probably the or 2019 just after 2019 I
00:27:47
had a conversation with her and then it
00:27:49
just and I also think that um
00:27:53
uh the passing of my bro accelerated
00:27:56
that for her. Um, so,
00:27:58
>> oh, how could it not?
00:28:00
>> Yeah. So, but to answer your question,
00:28:02
it's a really, which is a really good
00:28:04
question. I don't know the last time I
00:28:05
had a proper conversation with she
00:28:07
understood what I said. You know,
00:28:10
>> it was a long time ago.
00:28:11
>> Yeah.
00:28:11
>> Yeah.
00:28:13
>> Um, or the tears before I I think they
00:28:16
just show how much you care and the
00:28:17
impact, which I think is a good thing,
00:28:19
right?
00:28:20
>> Yeah. She's my she's she's my hero.
00:28:22
She's my absolute hero, you know. Um,
00:28:25
and you know, dad, and it's funny cuz
00:28:28
later on I, you know, I', you know, this
00:28:31
dad made some silly mistakes, but I
00:28:34
forgiven him for that. And
00:28:36
>> and I'm Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now it's just
00:28:39
like I I
00:28:42
can see I've seen my dad in a in a new
00:28:44
light now, you know, the the care and
00:28:47
love that I have for him cuz I blamed
00:28:48
him for a lot of things which I don't,
00:28:50
you know, without getting into it.
00:28:52
>> We don't need to get into the weeds.
00:28:53
Yeah, I've heard I think it was the
00:28:54
mandate podcast or another interview
00:28:56
where you
00:28:57
>> did he ever hear that? Like you called
00:28:58
him a a dreamer. Um and you said there's
00:29:02
a family joke like don't get in the trap
00:29:04
and the trap is like a one-on-one
00:29:06
conversation cuz
00:29:07
>> my my dad seriously like I who was it
00:29:10
>> for a long time like he loves to chat
00:29:13
about things and I
00:29:15
>> we all know someone like that.
00:29:16
>> Yeah. And I like now I appreciate that.
00:29:19
But I remember my mates would come we
00:29:21
know you when I was when when I was a
00:29:22
teenager my mates would come around and
00:29:24
I will always say to dude don't don't
00:29:26
get caught in this cuz one year once you
00:29:29
get caught mate that's it I can't help
00:29:31
you you're on your OWN
00:29:35
and few of my mates have been caught and
00:29:37
they'll be give me the go told you told
00:29:40
you I walk away from it
00:29:42
>> but who was it it was like I caught up
00:29:44
with a good friend of mine last night
00:29:46
and dad had written a post the thing is
00:29:48
with dad he's so articulate.
00:29:51
He's so articulate. And I think my
00:29:52
brother Mickey has got a little bit of
00:29:54
dad, you know, he's he's proud of the
00:29:58
fact that he was the only one in his
00:30:00
family that went to university and he
00:30:03
did. And he he's proud of that. But I
00:30:06
also think he's he's a lot more what I
00:30:11
feel bad about now is I wish I'd
00:30:13
listened to him a lot a lot more about
00:30:16
the cuz he's got such
00:30:19
such knowledge in in his brain which I
00:30:22
now am trying to get him and I think all
00:30:24
of us are saying to him, "Dad, you need
00:30:26
to write all that down." So he wants me
00:30:28
to buy him a computer, a laptop so he
00:30:30
can buy all that cuz
00:30:31
>> he's got this history of our, you know,
00:30:34
a knowledge and history of our family
00:30:36
that no one else knows about.
00:30:39
>> And I said to him, put that down, you
00:30:41
know, put that down. And I never used to
00:30:42
appreciate that, but now I I appreciate
00:30:46
him for that. And
00:30:47
>> it's just 10 times he's a million times
00:30:49
more articulate than I am than I am.
00:30:52
>> But he love, you know,
00:30:53
>> that's good. I I think you get to that
00:30:55
point um in life are where you realize
00:30:57
that yeah your parents regardless of how
00:30:59
awesome or how [ __ ] up they were they
00:31:00
doing the best they could.
00:31:01
>> They did. They did. And I Yeah.
00:31:03
>> You know your kids in their in their mid
00:31:06
to late 20s now. They probably got some
00:31:08
chip on their shoulder about how
00:31:09
>> Oh, hell yeah. My son has. He's even
00:31:11
told me.
00:31:14
>> I said, "Oh, that's just part of it.
00:31:16
Sorry, son. But that's just part of it."
00:31:17
Yeah.
00:31:18
>> But yeah, no, I Yeah, I I really
00:31:20
appreciate the old man now, you know,
00:31:23
>> and I and that's the one thing I see. We
00:31:25
had that someone else is telling me the
00:31:27
thing is as growing up, we had five
00:31:29
boys. There was five boys in our family
00:31:30
and then my sister came later on. But
00:31:32
during that time, we never went hungry.
00:31:36
>> Never. We were always clothed. We had a
00:31:39
roof under. We were never struggling. We
00:31:41
I I never saw that. There was always
00:31:43
food there. So, so and plus with
00:31:47
everything else.
00:31:50
So, I thank I thank my parents for that.
00:31:52
I had a good life as a kid, you know.
00:31:55
You know, this [ __ ] happens, but that's
00:31:57
with any other family. But
00:31:59
>> I I remember looking back and go, you
00:32:01
know what? I never we never struggled.
00:32:03
Mom and dad, if I ask for money, mom and
00:32:04
dad will always have money for me for
00:32:06
for school and stuff like that. I always
00:32:08
there was never a trip I couldn't go
00:32:10
because we couldn't afford it,
00:32:11
>> you know. We were always we always had
00:32:13
school uniform, you know, we always fed.
00:32:16
So I said and I never kind of realized
00:32:19
that until I spoke about it with someone
00:32:22
else the other day,
00:32:23
>> you know, and it was actually my mate
00:32:25
last night I was talking to and he was
00:32:27
saying, you know, saying, "Man, he your
00:32:29
dad is so is very articulate. Like my
00:32:31
dad and my other brother Tanu are very
00:32:34
art and my Mickey actually are very very
00:32:37
articulate.
00:32:38
>> I missed out on that boat. I also missed
00:32:40
I also missed out
00:32:42
>> I also missed out on rhythm. I don't
00:32:44
have rhythm.
00:32:47
>> I just missed I missed everything.
00:32:50
>> You've mentioned your brother Mickey a
00:32:51
few times. Um yeah.
00:32:53
>> Yeah. A little sidebar here. So he's in
00:32:54
the industry as well. Um he made one of
00:32:56
the greatest movies of 2025 in New
00:32:58
Zealand.
00:32:59
>> Yep.
00:33:00
>> He should have won the award for best
00:33:01
film.
00:33:02
>> This is Tina.
00:33:03
>> I'm saying it.
00:33:04
>> How how do I say it? I'm saying
00:33:05
>> Tina Tina Tina which is mother.
00:33:07
>> Yeah. Yeah. about some old music teacher
00:33:09
in Christ Church during the the
00:33:10
earthquakes.
00:33:11
>> I had I think it was the leader of the
00:33:13
opposition, Chris Hipkins, on the
00:33:15
podcast this year. I asked him when the
00:33:16
last time he cried was and he said it
00:33:17
was watching that movie. So I I got it
00:33:19
on Apple that night and um if you watch
00:33:22
that movie and you don't cry, like you
00:33:24
need to get a medical checkup.
00:33:25
>> Dude, I've seen it like six times and
00:33:27
every time I cry every time. I remember
00:33:29
seeing it for the first time actually.
00:33:31
It was me, mom, dad, and my daughter
00:33:33
Sophie. I bled my eyes out and I yeah I
00:33:39
am so sorry pardon me so so proud of him
00:33:43
cuz I know also that he has he's had to
00:33:46
fight to get to where he is now. I know
00:33:48
for a long time he was in in the uh
00:33:50
advertising industry and he worked for a
00:33:53
production company for a very long time
00:33:55
and he just bit his time kind of thing
00:33:57
and he wanted to create his whole dream
00:34:00
was to become a movie a filmmaker
00:34:03
>> and he did that you know but I know the
00:34:06
road I know how hard it was for him to
00:34:08
get to where he is now just watching
00:34:10
people surpass him and not you know not
00:34:14
realizing that dude you're letting other
00:34:17
people surpass a guy that's actually
00:34:18
better than these guys.
00:34:20
>> So for him to you know the thing is with
00:34:24
Tina it was never expected to get a
00:34:26
Aussie release
00:34:28
and then when I got Aussie release on
00:34:30
top of that they got a US release. So it
00:34:34
you know it weighed way beyond anything
00:34:37
that he he had ever expected. But it was
00:34:39
also the the wonderful thing about Tina
00:34:41
is it brought families back to the
00:34:43
theater come you know they're struggling
00:34:45
to get numbers in there but Tina brought
00:34:47
everyone back in there
00:34:49
>> you know
00:34:51
how did you feel when you watched it
00:34:53
knowing um knowing it was your brother
00:34:54
is the brains behind it but also I
00:34:56
suppose on a deeper level that someone
00:34:58
like me watching it couldn't see um you
00:35:00
may recognize some of the characters
00:35:02
potentially I don't know
00:35:03
>> um
00:35:06
I I mean I re I I I mean there was a
00:35:08
little bit mom and Annabella's um um
00:35:11
character. I mean I I think as
00:35:15
I was going to say um PI, but I think
00:35:17
there's in all society there is there's
00:35:21
that person in our lives, you know, um
00:35:23
Anabella's character. Um
00:35:27
but in terms of
00:35:29
anything relating to my me personally,
00:35:31
probably not. Yeah. Yeah.
00:35:33
>> I was just Yeah.
00:35:35
>> So your introduction to acting Yeah.
00:35:38
you. What did you want to be when you
00:35:39
were in secondary school? What did you
00:35:40
want to be?
00:35:42
>> Did you want to be a pro rugby player?
00:35:43
>> I wanted to be a dancer
00:35:46
>> like for for who?
00:35:47
>> I didn't know.
00:35:48
>> I'm just trying to think who was um who
00:35:50
would have been a big artist at like MC
00:35:51
a dance for MC Hammer.
00:35:53
>> No, I never I've got no rhythm. Um do
00:35:56
you know the the it it all started I
00:35:58
think it all started when I was uh
00:36:02
primary school.
00:36:04
We got up, the seed was um uh planted
00:36:09
when we got up.
00:36:10
>> Strathmore Primary.
00:36:11
>> Strathmore Primary School.
00:36:13
>> And I got up and made people laugh and I
00:36:15
thought, "Oh, this is cool. What's this
00:36:16
all about?" And then that's when it's
00:36:19
kind of And then during that period, I
00:36:21
was I ended up uh where was I? I was at
00:36:24
St. Pat St. Pat's Town in Wellington.
00:36:28
And my drama teacher said,
00:36:31
my drama teacher said, "Look, my my cast
00:36:33
teammate's looking for two Polynesian
00:36:35
for this this ad." So, me and my mate,
00:36:37
me, my mate Null, and uh Henry went to
00:36:40
audition for it.
00:36:41
>> Did you Did you listen to that?
00:36:43
>> Yeah, I did. I tried to find the ad.
00:36:45
There's a couple of different stories
00:36:46
online. Someone said it's an ad for a
00:36:49
national party recruiting new cops.
00:36:52
>> Yeah. No, no, no, no, it wasn't. It
00:36:53
wasn't. The one was is um the Labour
00:36:55
Party brought this thing about going
00:36:57
back to school. Um so that the ad was
00:37:00
all about that. So it was three it was
00:37:02
all these students walking down a
00:37:04
corridor and each room each room is
00:37:07
possibly your career, you know. So you
00:37:09
could be a builder here and then open
00:37:11
another door, you could be a plumber
00:37:13
there. So I was one of the the the boys
00:37:15
in there. But I remember the the
00:37:17
audition
00:37:20
just over.
00:37:22
So they what was it on the audition?
00:37:24
They said to it, "Okay, well I want you
00:37:25
guys to imagine that you're going down
00:37:26
this corridor and every time you see
00:37:28
every time a door opens up to a
00:37:30
classroom, you're just like, "Wow, get
00:37:32
excited about it." So three of us filmed
00:37:35
us. Soon we started like that. As soon
00:37:38
as it happened, it was just like it took
00:37:39
over. It's like, "Wow, wow." one night
00:37:43
and my teammates are going
00:37:46
WOW
00:37:50
like Disney's job
00:37:52
desperate to be but I didn't even know
00:37:54
it's just when they said action going
00:37:57
this is me yeah wow
00:38:00
>> and I remember them on the bus they were
00:38:01
really quiet I said what's wrong with
00:38:03
you guys he goes yeah you know
00:38:05
>> we didn't even get a chance to audition
00:38:06
cuz someone was always in front of the
00:38:08
camera they hugged the whole camera end
00:38:09
up getting the ad but that was it I
00:38:11
turned up to see it and I said, "Hey,
00:38:12
how do I get more work like this?" Said,
00:38:14
"Get an agent. Look up the yellow uh
00:38:16
white pages.
00:38:17
Double happy." Went and saw them and my
00:38:21
career started from there.
00:38:22
>> Wow. Did you Did your paths cross with
00:38:24
Tika? You're a similar age. He would
00:38:26
have been in Wellington at the same
00:38:27
time.
00:38:27
>> Strip together,
00:38:28
>> right?
00:38:28
>> The strip. You
00:38:30
>> Oh, the strip. Oh, you're with um Jody
00:38:32
Rimmer.
00:38:32
>> Jody Rimmer. Lan Gordon.
00:38:36
Who else was there? Yeah. Dave Farney.
00:38:39
Um yeah, we crossed paths in the second
00:38:41
season of the strip. He was one of the
00:38:43
strippers,
00:38:45
>> was he?
00:38:46
>> Yeah.
00:38:47
>> I have to dish look it up.
00:38:48
>> That's got to be on screen or somewhere
00:38:50
to probably No. No. Um so that's when we
00:38:53
cross with me and um mentioning
00:38:58
each other. But then we also when the
00:39:00
naked sours would do the Edinburgh
00:39:02
festival, the Eden comedy festival um
00:39:05
Jermaine, Brett and Tika were there. for
00:39:09
the same time as well. So, we kind of
00:39:11
went around supporting each other's
00:39:12
acts. So, we've known each Yeah. And
00:39:14
then, you know, working with Jermaine
00:39:16
when we did skits way back then for
00:39:18
Gibson Group.
00:39:20
>> So, we've known each other for a little
00:39:22
bit. They just they're more successful
00:39:24
than some of us.
00:39:25
>> Yeah.
00:39:26
>> You can't get into his skated community
00:39:28
now.
00:39:30
>> Dude, can I tell you a story about Tao?
00:39:32
>> Yes, please.
00:39:34
>> Super Bowl. One of the Super Bowl. It
00:39:36
was in LA
00:39:38
and I was there at the time seeing my
00:39:41
girlfriend at the time and we planned
00:39:44
and me me and my girlfriend's planned or
00:39:45
we just go to a bar and watch um Super
00:39:47
Bowl. I was staying at this hotel. Get a
00:39:50
text from a man. He goes, "Bro, what are
00:39:52
you doing?" "Oh, nothing much. Why? What
00:39:55
are you doing for Super Bowl?" I said,
00:39:57
"I was just going to watch at the bar."
00:39:59
And he goes, "Do you want tickets?"
00:40:05
I said I show my gift ticket to Super
00:40:09
Bowl
00:40:10
and he goes, "Uh, yeah, if you're giving
00:40:12
them away." Go, "Sweet. We got tickets
00:40:14
for you." He sent me two tickets to
00:40:15
Super Bowl. That's when the Rams won in
00:40:18
LA, dude. And these seats were right in
00:40:21
front. So, I got to see um uh Snoop
00:40:25
Dogg, um Dr. Dre, all those guys at
00:40:29
Halime. It was unreal.
00:40:32
And he had to say, "What a dude." And I
00:40:34
said, "Fuck."
00:40:36
Super Bowl. I thought I was in
00:40:38
dreamland. I was just like my my
00:40:40
girlfriend at the time, what the [ __ ]
00:40:43
>> Why did he not Did he have something
00:40:45
else on?
00:40:45
>> He had spare tickets.
00:40:46
>> Spare tickets.
00:40:48
>> Got spare tickets.
00:40:48
>> No, I think I think it was his tickets,
00:40:52
>> but his retita had tickets as well. So,
00:40:55
he had two tickets spare. So, it was
00:40:57
just like, "Dude, what are you doing?"
00:40:58
It was just that classic. Hey bro, what
00:40:59
are you doing? Nothing. You want two
00:41:01
tickets? Two tickets in a super bowl.
00:41:03
>> Oh, that's so awesome.
00:41:04
>> [ __ ]
00:41:05
>> When did you realize When did you
00:41:07
realize it could be a viable career?
00:41:10
>> When I did commercials,
00:41:12
>> commercials back then paid big big
00:41:14
money. I scored a lotto strike. When the
00:41:18
lotto strike first came out, I was the
00:41:20
face of it. So, I was this guy that hit
00:41:22
a strike went out. So, um, and I got big
00:41:26
money for that. How much?
00:41:29
>> I think we're between the thousands. I
00:41:30
think probably for for a kid at school I
00:41:33
think of probably about 8 grand or some
00:41:35
[ __ ] And that's and that's a lot. And I
00:41:37
thought [ __ ] this is a
00:41:39
>> So I never went into it. I mean it's it
00:41:43
was the money thing for me when it first
00:41:45
started off. But then as you know as I
00:41:47
went on it was just like I started to
00:41:48
appreciate the art.
00:41:50
>> Yeah. I've heard you talk about it um
00:41:52
just about how much you love theater.
00:41:54
But theater is almost like a hobby or a
00:41:55
passion project, but it's the ads and
00:41:57
the other things that pay the bills.
00:41:59
>> I first I first my first my first
00:42:01
theater was with um a good friend of
00:42:03
mine uh Victor Roger.
00:42:06
>> Um I actually did one for who was it?
00:42:09
Circa down there, but I don't count that
00:42:11
one.
00:42:13
>> Why?
00:42:15
Cuz I was just a toen brown guy. They
00:42:17
came on, had sex with a white woman, and
00:42:19
then that was it.
00:42:24
That was basically it. I came on stage,
00:42:27
you know, nothing on, just ear love,
00:42:30
have sex with her, and it goes and see
00:42:32
that was me. So, I don't count that one,
00:42:34
but
00:42:38
you hunk reputation thing. Has that been
00:42:41
good or bad?
00:42:44
>> How do I answer that? It's helped. It's
00:42:48
helped. For a long time, I was the guy
00:42:49
that get your [ __ ] off. I was the get
00:42:51
your [ __ ] off guy for a very long time.
00:42:53
Now I'm old. I said this [ __ ] shirt's
00:42:55
staying on.
00:42:58
>> This shirt is freaking staying on.
00:43:00
>> Yeah, it's someone else's turn.
00:43:01
>> Someone else has too. But but yeah.
00:43:04
>> Um what's the hardest thing about um the
00:43:07
acting industry that people outside
00:43:08
don't get to see? I feel like you sort
00:43:09
of alluded before with that quote before
00:43:12
about people think you're you're rich or
00:43:13
this.
00:43:15
>> I mean, put it this way. 2024 I 2024 I
00:43:20
landed uh rescue high surf
00:43:22
>> right
00:43:23
>> and for so many years just that was the
00:43:26
pinnacle was to get work in US right and
00:43:29
then I land that and think
00:43:32
okay if this all goes well there'd be a
00:43:34
second season third season fourth season
00:43:36
blah blah blah financially that's pretty
00:43:38
good
00:43:39
we go
00:43:42
we do the first season and then we get
00:43:45
cancelled and we don't get again. So,
00:43:47
it's back to the drawing board. It's I'm
00:43:49
a little bit used to it now because I'm
00:43:51
a little bit smarter with my money to
00:43:53
help with people that are good with
00:43:54
money, but it's it's a I have a lovehate
00:43:59
relationship with what I do. I couldn't
00:44:01
see myself doing anything else.
00:44:03
>> But it like for example, this year I've
00:44:06
done one job, but that's in New Zealand,
00:44:08
you know, other than that, nothing else.
00:44:10
So, I've just had to just depend. The
00:44:13
whole thing is about saving money,
00:44:14
making sure that you can survive another
00:44:16
year, another year. Now it's all about
00:44:18
topping up that little
00:44:19
>> cup of
00:44:21
>> But it's a [ __ ] It's a It's When it
00:44:24
rains, it pours and when it's good, it's
00:44:26
fantastic. But now I'm at that point now
00:44:29
where I can sit back and I've got things
00:44:32
that keep me occupied as well. You know,
00:44:34
like I love motorcycles. I love riding
00:44:36
motorcycles. I've got my friends here um
00:44:39
that I was which is the one of the main
00:44:42
reasons I come back here all the time
00:44:43
cuz all my close mates are are still
00:44:45
here.
00:44:46
>> So it's I've gotten used to it. I've
00:44:48
gotten used but it's a shift.
00:44:50
>> It's stressful living. Yeah.
00:44:51
>> Oh my god. There's that saying this too
00:44:54
shall pass. And it's it's true. It means
00:44:55
bad times will pass but good times will
00:44:57
pass.
00:44:58
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, cuz you I
00:45:00
mean you know you get to America and
00:45:02
money is ridiculous
00:45:03
>> when you do it and then you think okay
00:45:06
here we go but then the reality kicks in
00:45:08
again and I'm back to square one again
00:45:09
and go trying to get work you know um
00:45:12
the the the one thing I am thankful for
00:45:15
is because people know my work here.
00:45:17
There's always work here for me you know
00:45:19
and also
00:45:21
>> I have mates that are now in the
00:45:23
position where they're doing their own
00:45:24
stuff. So they'll just text me go, "Boy,
00:45:25
do you want to be on this show without
00:45:27
auditioning?" You know, there's still
00:45:29
things that I still I still have to go
00:45:31
through the whole auditioning thing. Um,
00:45:34
so it's it's it's never ending,
00:45:36
>> but I think the the the trick is to have
00:45:39
things outside of that to keep you
00:45:41
occupied so that doesn't go so that
00:45:44
doesn't drive you insane. For me is is
00:45:46
motorcycles,
00:45:47
>> right? Yeah. What do you get from
00:45:49
motorcycles?
00:45:51
>> What is it? Is it the freedom?
00:45:52
>> Freedom. Are you are you are you a loner
00:45:55
or do you just have like a like a little
00:45:56
loner part of you that needs to
00:45:59
>> I like riding. I like I I like like when
00:46:02
I first
00:46:04
took up modus Yeah. I like riding by
00:46:07
myself but I've also now got like you
00:46:10
know as you get older and I'm sure it's
00:46:12
the same with you. I have a community of
00:46:13
people that I only go to. You know, I've
00:46:16
gone to I've I've gone to a part of my
00:46:19
life that I don't need cuz I'm I was a
00:46:22
huge people pleaser.
00:46:23
>> But now it's part of my life then cuz I
00:46:25
don't need that person in my life. I
00:46:27
don't need that person, just that
00:46:28
person. And I want to be with that
00:46:30
person till I die. So I've got that
00:46:31
community here of men of guys that I
00:46:34
ride with and women. And then I got um
00:46:38
there's I don't know whether you know
00:46:39
the the Cox's Bay touch that we have. So
00:46:42
this year we had the 20th anniversary
00:46:44
>> of
00:46:46
same time, same day, rain or shine,
00:46:48
didn't matter where. And that there what
00:46:52
started off I was one of the um OGs. And
00:46:56
originally we started touch because in
00:46:59
that period of our lives, people were
00:47:00
either retiring from rugby or but we
00:47:04
needed something to do. We needed to
00:47:07
play touch to earn a beer was that whole
00:47:09
thing, you know. But now as we've gotten
00:47:12
older, it's become like a support group
00:47:14
for for for for all the boys now. You
00:47:18
know that during the 20 years, you know,
00:47:20
we've had wives, brothers, sisters that
00:47:23
have passed.
00:47:24
>> So that group there has been always
00:47:27
there. It's a support group for all the
00:47:28
boys. You know, we've had people that,
00:47:30
you know, [ __ ] had happened to them.
00:47:32
>> We said, "Bro, we're here for you. I
00:47:34
know that [ __ ] but we're here for you."
00:47:35
So there's a community of men that just
00:47:38
look out for each other and support each
00:47:39
other, which is which has been a godsend
00:47:42
for me and a lot of those guys.
00:47:44
>> Yeah. That's so powerful. It's so
00:47:45
cathartic cuz Yeah. No one gets to their
00:47:47
50s without some battle scars.
00:47:48
>> No. Oh, dude. There's some battle scars
00:47:50
in there. But what what is beautiful now
00:47:53
is our sons or the sons of the boys that
00:47:56
are there. They started playing like
00:47:57
they was playing when they were there,
00:47:59
but now they're taking on that mantle.
00:48:01
But also, I mean, we're trying to
00:48:03
encourage them that, you know, keep
00:48:06
doing this, bring more people in and
00:48:09
have it as a support group instead of
00:48:11
just having a I mean, we do have a few
00:48:12
beers and take the piss out of each
00:48:14
other. That's all part of it.
00:48:17
>> Yeah.
00:48:17
>> But when [ __ ] hits the fan, we are
00:48:19
always there. We're always there for
00:48:21
each other.
00:48:21
>> Yeah. Well, I suppose like if if if it's
00:48:23
someone that can roast you the hardest,
00:48:25
they can also love you the hardest,
00:48:26
>> dude. Yep. These guys will roast me.
00:48:29
They're terrible. But I I love it. I
00:48:32
love it because I trust them. I know
00:48:33
them. I've known them for over 20 years.
00:48:36
>> You know,
00:48:37
>> it's a good decade. E, the 50s. I I
00:48:39
reckon when I was in my 20s, I think I I
00:48:41
I thought I had it all figured out. And
00:48:42
then as you get older, you the older I
00:48:44
get to realize the the less I know.
00:48:46
>> Yeah.
00:48:47
>> And it's a good I like it.
00:48:49
>> Where you What What 50s are you?
00:48:50
>> 52.
00:48:51
>> 52.
00:48:52
>> What are you? It's
00:48:53
>> 53.
00:48:53
>> Yeah. Why do you look so much better?
00:48:56
>> It's the mo I use this moisturizer. It's
00:48:59
called Forever Youthful.
00:49:01
I'm going to buy that chemistry house.
00:49:04
Where is it?
00:49:05
>> Warehouse. Warehouse.
00:49:06
>> Yeah. Um, I got some Jeez. There's so
00:49:10
much deep stuff here. It's really good,
00:49:11
but I feel like I need a few acting
00:49:12
questions in here as well. Um, so Lord
00:49:14
of the Rings, that was one of your big
00:49:15
early projects that you were on.
00:49:17
>> Yeah.
00:49:17
>> Yeah. How what was that experience like?
00:49:19
>> I remember the first I was actually
00:49:21
telling who was I was telling my niece
00:49:22
about this. Um, it was me and Nathaniel
00:49:25
Lee, another um Polynesian actor, great
00:49:28
actor. He lives down in Wellington, but
00:49:30
we were the or uh was it the Urukai?
00:49:33
Urukai, I think we were. And we're down
00:49:36
in Wellington. I remember the first time
00:49:38
we were on on the chair. I remember we
00:49:40
it was like 4:00 we got picked up and
00:49:42
then we were on the chair
00:49:45
4:30 or something or 5:00 and I remember
00:49:48
just getting there and I just fell
00:49:49
asleep and they just went
00:49:52
woke up about 3 hours later. Didn't even
00:49:55
[ __ ] recognize myself. I freaked out
00:49:57
because all the prosthetic and stuff,
00:50:00
>> but I um I mean I I only had a small
00:50:04
role in that and but I I do remember we
00:50:07
were filming down in the South Island
00:50:10
and we me and uh Nathaniel were put up
00:50:14
in this um uh homestead in Alexandra, I
00:50:18
think it was. I think it might have been
00:50:20
Alexandra.
00:50:23
I swear we turned up so they knew that.
00:50:26
So the production booked. They go,
00:50:27
"We've got two actors out staying with
00:50:29
you." They got all excited.
00:50:33
We turn up in the van. We open the door.
00:50:38
Dude, this woman that owned it was
00:50:40
shocked to see two Polynesians. Okay.
00:50:42
She just went, "Oh, hello."
00:50:48
Cuz I think she thought that was just
00:50:50
like these, you know, these. You
00:50:52
remember is it Siri and Melan is it is
00:50:54
it
00:50:56
Orlando and there was just these two two
00:50:58
star boys. HEY
00:51:03
>> oh welcome welcome.
00:51:06
>> But we had it was just me and Nat and
00:51:08
this freaking flash place and then like
00:51:10
you know we bottle wine took it down to
00:51:13
the pool watch the stars. I mean the spa
00:51:15
we just drank it. They I mean they they
00:51:18
were great but I think they were just
00:51:19
shocked to see
00:51:21
them color people
00:51:24
>> in the South Island
00:51:27
people.
00:51:28
>> So um did you have anything to do with
00:51:30
Sir Peter Jackson or is the project so
00:51:32
big that
00:51:32
>> No, actually we did. There was one we
00:51:34
shot in Wellington. It was a warehouse
00:51:35
in Wellington and he flew in from the
00:51:37
South Island I think filmed because two
00:51:40
of the main characters the the were in
00:51:43
that scene. So he flew in and we were in
00:51:46
the background.
00:51:47
>> Um I never had anything cuz I was just
00:51:49
in the you know I was just in the
00:51:51
background kind of extra. So a lot of
00:51:53
the scenes were just with him and the
00:51:55
main cast.
00:51:56
>> So that was my only interaction
00:51:57
>> with Peter Jackson. Then I think
00:51:59
>> finished that and flew back down to to
00:52:01
South.
00:52:03
>> Naked some Owens is a a project that's
00:52:05
been another big part of your career.
00:52:06
For anyone that's not familiar with
00:52:07
Naked Sons, how would you how would you
00:52:09
describe it?
00:52:11
>> You're the only one that actually sort
00:52:12
of got naked on stage. Get Dave Far
00:52:14
here.
00:52:15
>> I love Dave Far. We were doing breakfast
00:52:17
radio at the same time and often see him
00:52:19
at Wild Bean at like 5 in the morning.
00:52:21
>> Right.
00:52:21
>> I was on my way to the edge. He was on
00:52:22
his way to Flavor I think he was at.
00:52:24
>> Yeah. Or Mars.
00:52:25
>> This isn't a sausage roll day.
00:52:30
>> The naked sours.
00:52:33
How would I describe the naked sour? I I
00:52:35
know. I mean to to for those that don't
00:52:37
know it was born from the fact that
00:52:38
there was very little work for PIs on
00:52:42
screen and stage. So the boys created
00:52:45
this you know created nasorn so they can
00:52:49
tell their story for for our own people
00:52:51
which is now spread out to you know
00:52:55
>> I think that's it. Eh yeah
00:52:56
>> yeah it's very How did you get connected
00:52:58
with them?
00:53:00
>> Were you the founder or did you get
00:53:02
>> No, I wasn't. What? So the original Oh,
00:53:05
>> hey Bubba
00:53:06
>> Kanye. The little dog's just woken up.
00:53:08
>> Oh,
00:53:08
>> good boy.
00:53:09
>> Um, the original the O the the OGs were
00:53:11
David Farane, Oscar Kiteley, Shimpali,
00:53:14
and Maronga.
00:53:16
>> They were the the the the OG. I came
00:53:19
later on um because they had another
00:53:22
show where it needed another a member
00:53:25
and that was that was I came on I don't
00:53:27
know what year but I do remember me and
00:53:29
Dave were working on um the strip at the
00:53:32
time when he he asked me to be part of
00:53:35
the NAS
00:53:37
>> and that was that was a few years ago.
00:53:39
>> You guys going to do some more stuff?
00:53:40
>> Is it hard to get everyone together?
00:53:42
Funny enough, I mean, if if there's rich
00:53:45
people out there that want to fund us,
00:53:48
nice. We cuz we did we did the comedy
00:53:51
festival, the latest comedy festival. Um
00:53:55
uh so we did Yeah. So that was the
00:53:58
earlier on this year we did that. But we
00:54:01
want to do there's a lot of um a lot of
00:54:04
people in LA that like the show and
00:54:05
people in Hawaii. So, we want to tour we
00:54:08
want to do a tour of either Hawaii or
00:54:11
the US
00:54:14
>> um of our last show which was Go Home.
00:54:17
Go Home is um Yeah, we did Go Home a few
00:54:20
years ago. But, um
00:54:21
>> was it the naked sows that sort of led
00:54:23
to Sion's wedding?
00:54:25
>> Yeah.
00:54:25
>> One of the one of the one of the
00:54:26
greatest and most successful New Zealand
00:54:28
comedies ever.
00:54:29
>> Yeah. the late um the late legend John
00:54:32
Barnett saw the boys perform
00:54:35
>> and he said to his writer I think it
00:54:37
might have been James at the time he and
00:54:39
said we need to do a film with those
00:54:40
guys. So and that's how and then James
00:54:42
got in contact with Oscar and Sion's
00:54:45
wedding was was born.
00:54:47
>> Wow.
00:54:48
>> Yeah.
00:54:48
>> And then Shortland Street you were on
00:54:50
that for a couple of years. Um Dr.
00:54:51
Maxwell Aia
00:54:52
>> Aia.
00:54:54
Yeah. How was that? Like that must have
00:54:56
been good getting a getting a regular
00:54:58
steady paycheck for a couple of years or
00:55:00
>> those three years I did that.
00:55:01
>> Did you a steep learning curve as well
00:55:03
like doing that much acting
00:55:05
>> and of course
00:55:05
>> but I've never been in that environment
00:55:07
before where this is you know multi
00:55:09
camps it's like one here one there one
00:55:11
there. So it's almost like performing on
00:55:12
stage so I never got used um I mean that
00:55:15
was that was a new world for me that was
00:55:18
fast fast turnaround TV for a long time.
00:55:22
It's funny because I was I was a doctor.
00:55:24
I think I was the first Polynesian
00:55:26
doctor on that show. So, I had all these
00:55:28
medical terms I heaps, man. And I just
00:55:31
couldn't get them out. So, I I used to
00:55:34
go to the writers and I said to them,
00:55:36
"Hey, can you seriously if we're going
00:55:38
to finish the day, ease off of the
00:55:40
medical terms? Can't I just say
00:55:42
neuropen
00:55:46
parac can't I just say that without the
00:55:48
actual medical term?" And they said,
00:55:51
"Oh, Robbie, you're so funny." No, but
00:55:56
um
00:55:56
>> was it enjoyable? I enjoyed it.
00:55:58
>> It was enjoy. You know, the thing is the
00:55:59
thing is about Shortland Street is you
00:56:02
have got a steady income for a year, you
00:56:04
know, and then you negotiate the the the
00:56:06
contract again. But I always say to
00:56:08
myself, when I get bored of this, I'm
00:56:10
gone. So after the third year, I got
00:56:14
bored and I left. M
00:56:16
>> um and there I mean the un see Shortland
00:56:20
Street can be also uh not no I won't say
00:56:24
trap but there's
00:56:26
>> it's that consistent income that golden
00:56:29
that got yeah
00:56:30
>> yes yeah so which is which is why I
00:56:33
think a lot of people stay stay behind
00:56:35
but I for me it was just like no once
00:56:37
I'm done I'm out
00:56:39
>> and then Wentworth came along and
00:56:42
>> what how come you okay yes so Wentworth
00:56:44
um Australian prison in the show um set
00:56:47
in Melbourne um eight seasons 100
00:56:49
episodes as Will Jackson. Why? How come
00:56:51
you got bored of Shortland Street and
00:56:52
you didn't get bored of Wentworth?
00:56:54
>> That's a big stint on one show.
00:56:55
>> Two different shows.
00:56:57
>> Two different shows in terms of you know
00:56:59
Sha Street Soap.
00:57:01
>> Wentworth I mean you know it's in terms
00:57:04
of drama and story it's it's next level
00:57:06
but that's you know that's where they
00:57:08
they they kind of sat um apart from the
00:57:10
last season of um Wentworth. Loved it.
00:57:14
Loved it. You know, it was the first
00:57:15
show that challenged me as an actor.
00:57:18
There was one season there that was
00:57:19
Yeah. two seasons there where I really
00:57:21
really enjoyed because it was focused on
00:57:23
on on Will.
00:57:24
>> But um
00:57:26
>> is that is that show bigger in Australia
00:57:27
or NZ?
00:57:28
>> It's huge around the world, dude. I'm
00:57:29
doing a Wentworth Con still exists. They
00:57:32
have Wentworth Con in America, uh
00:57:35
Canada, UK, and it's still going to this
00:57:38
day. There's still fans out there that
00:57:40
are still, you know,
00:57:42
>> where's the where's the weirdest place I
00:57:44
went where fan has um hit you up?
00:57:47
>> I had one lady turn up in a wedding
00:57:50
dress and said, "I'm here to marry you,
00:57:53
Will."
00:57:56
It freaked the [ __ ] out of me. I mean, I
00:57:58
got to know her. I mean, I know she was
00:58:00
she was she was joking and you know, I
00:58:02
got to know her. She was lovely, but it
00:58:03
was like just complete wedding dress and
00:58:06
said, "I'm here to marry you." I said,
00:58:08
But they're you know what I I'm not
00:58:10
going to give there there are they are
00:58:12
intense.
00:58:14
>> They are very intense that our fans but
00:58:17
loyal to the
00:58:18
>> to the bone
00:58:21
they still goes.
00:58:23
>> I'm doing one in Sydney. I'm doing one
00:58:25
in Sydney next year in February. It's I
00:58:27
mean it's
00:58:28
>> and um
00:58:29
>> yeah.
00:58:30
>> What acting goals do you still have if
00:58:32
any? Is it a career where where you can
00:58:34
have goals or are you sort of at the
00:58:36
mercy of
00:58:37
>> for a long time I just wanted to do
00:58:38
acting thing and achieve that?
00:58:40
>> Um I that's still my goal but I think
00:58:44
I've I want to probably explore behind
00:58:48
the camera either producing
00:58:50
>> um I think producing probably I'd want
00:58:52
to get stuck into not directing.
00:58:54
>> I don't think I'd be a good director.
00:58:56
>> What's the difference?
00:58:57
>> Well the director um it's on set. He's
00:59:00
the one that control. He's the one that
00:59:02
tells the story on set producer. I
00:59:04
there's all sorts of producers. There's
00:59:06
the guy that looks for the money and
00:59:07
there's a guy that looks for
00:59:09
>> um the talent kind of thing. So there's
00:59:11
all sorts of um you know limbs when it
00:59:13
comes to producing. I just want to learn
00:59:15
how it all works behind the scene cuz
00:59:18
I'm getting also getting to that period
00:59:19
of my career that you know there's not
00:59:21
much work for me around. So I need to
00:59:23
produce my own stuff which is a lot of
00:59:25
what people back in US are doing. You
00:59:28
know
00:59:28
>> guys like Ben Affleck they've got their
00:59:30
own production company. So then they can
00:59:31
work. So get the work,
00:59:33
>> create the work, their own work.
00:59:34
>> Is it glaringly obvious how much the
00:59:36
work dries up
00:59:37
>> as you age
00:59:42
>> or is it just the sort of roles like you
00:59:44
go from being the hunk to
00:59:45
>> Yeah. Well, I think I at the moment
00:59:47
there was one that I auditioned where I
00:59:49
wanted to get an audition for asked for
00:59:50
an audition but I which I think I'm
00:59:52
falling in. I was either too young
00:59:56
or too old. So, I'm now in that gap as
00:59:59
he's Yeah, he's No man's land. Yeah. No
01:00:02
man's land at the moment. So, I need to
01:00:04
be 60 before I can get the roles.
01:00:06
>> The dad rolls.
01:00:06
>> Yeah, the dad rolls. I mean, I'm I'm
01:00:08
still I'm getting the dad rolls at the
01:00:09
moment, but
01:00:10
>> Yeah.
01:00:11
>> Yeah. Um,
01:00:14
how comfortable are you um talking
01:00:16
talking about your brother, reflecting
01:00:17
about your brother? Pua poos.
01:00:20
>> Poos.
01:00:21
>> Yeah.
01:00:22
>> Is it hard to talk about?
01:00:24
Um,
01:00:26
I mean there are things that I I'm happy
01:00:28
to talk about, but there's also things
01:00:30
um that I don't want to tap into.
01:00:35
>> Yeah.
01:00:36
>> Um, for me, I mean, I think for Yeah.
01:00:40
Yeah. Ask me questions about that.
01:00:42
>> Okay. Um, yeah. May 11, 2019.
01:00:45
>> Mhm.
01:00:47
>> What are you What are your memories of
01:00:48
that day?
01:00:52
Uh, I was at home
01:00:54
3:00 in the morning. I get a call from B
01:00:58
twin,
01:01:00
didn't answer it. Then he called again,
01:01:03
didn't answer it. Third time I answered
01:01:05
it and he was Tana was on the on the
01:01:09
phone saying, "Hey."
01:01:12
Uh, and he said, "Yep, um, Pooh's just
01:01:15
passed.
01:01:16
didn't
01:01:19
didn't register that. I said, "What?" I
01:01:21
said, "Poor poor passed away." I went,
01:01:23
"What the fuck?" So, I didn't I didn't
01:01:26
really hit me
01:01:29
until later on. So, what had happened
01:01:30
was I it it it I I hung up.
01:01:35
I tried to call my brother just to let
01:01:38
him know, Mix, let him know he wasn't
01:01:40
answering his phone.
01:01:44
So, I got in the car and drove to his
01:01:45
place, knocked on the door, and I told
01:01:48
him, and I hung out there for a little
01:01:50
bit. Then I went back home, and that's
01:01:53
when it hit. Um, I was just like, yeah,
01:01:57
in my room, uncontrollable
01:02:00
emotion. It's just like, yeah, it really
01:02:03
hit everybody. I was in on the floor
01:02:06
pulling my eyes just like angry. Just
01:02:09
angry at what had happened. So, yeah.
01:02:13
because I don't think anyone can I mean
01:02:15
there's a there's a lot of people
01:02:16
that'll be um listening to this or
01:02:18
watching this whose lives have been um
01:02:19
impacted by um a suicide but I don't
01:02:22
think there's anything that can prepare
01:02:24
you for that sort of level of shock and
01:02:26
grief and
01:02:27
>> no
01:02:27
>> everything and there was um oh man there
01:02:30
was a a quote from you I saw this in um
01:02:32
an article um you talk about connecting
01:02:35
with your mom and she was wailing and
01:02:37
saying I was supposed to go first
01:02:39
>> yeah that's when we bought Paul's body
01:02:42
uh to uh my brother's house, you know,
01:02:45
but yeah, when his body arrived at my
01:02:47
brother's house, he was she was just
01:02:49
that was hard to Yeah, that was tough.
01:02:53
Yeah. As she w Yeah, she was walking in
01:02:55
with him and it was just like, it should
01:02:56
be me.
01:02:57
>> It should be me. It's not you.
01:03:00
>> You mentioned earlier that you think
01:03:01
that um losing a son sort of accelerated
01:03:04
her into how could it not?
01:03:07
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:03:07
>> I mean, how could it not have an impact?
01:03:10
It's like it's terrible. Um, do you
01:03:13
remember your last conversation with
01:03:14
him? How close were you guys? Was it you
01:03:16
just I'm just thinking of me and me and
01:03:18
my brother. He lives in Perth. We can go
01:03:20
for months without speaking to each
01:03:21
other, but the the love is still there
01:03:23
or we Yeah, we text every few weeks.
01:03:25
Were you like um were you close close?
01:03:27
Like
01:03:27
>> I was close with Poose.
01:03:28
>> Yeah, I was close. Poo had different
01:03:30
relationship with all his bros. But I
01:03:33
our rel uh
01:03:35
our our
01:03:37
relationship was because I he started I
01:03:41
took up writing. He took up writing. I
01:03:43
took up acting. He started to take up
01:03:44
acting. So he kind of followed my path
01:03:46
and he was always proud to say that. Um
01:03:51
yeah. So our our connection was through
01:03:54
the one one he was my little bro and two
01:03:58
is because of the industry that we
01:04:00
decided to to to um you know take on
01:04:04
>> um I don't remember the last
01:04:06
conversation I I did have with him
01:04:10
but uh
01:04:11
>> well you're not expecting it to be
01:04:13
something poant or profound are you?
01:04:15
Because it's just a call with your bro.
01:04:17
>> Yeah. Well it's like your question
01:04:18
before about mom. When was the last
01:04:19
conversation you had with your mom
01:04:21
>> that she understood? I don't know.
01:04:24
>> And that's I suppose that's the other
01:04:25
thing as well when it's taking the
01:04:30
one making that effort to get in contact
01:04:32
with the the people that you love
01:04:34
because you just don't know now,
01:04:35
>> you know.
01:04:36
>> Um but yeah, that was tough. That was
01:04:39
tough. I mean, I'm the the the the the
01:04:41
shitty thing about um me now is,
01:04:46
you know, as the years have gone on, you
01:04:49
know, I do I do remember this. There are
01:04:53
certain songs that I that reminds me of
01:04:55
him. Um
01:04:58
but I don't it it doesn't enter my mind
01:05:00
as much anymore like it used to. And
01:05:02
that's the [ __ ] up thing about, you
01:05:04
know, our lives, you know.
01:05:07
But we still we still um um you know we
01:05:10
still celebrate him on the 19th of May.
01:05:13
>> So it'll be coming up to 7 years I
01:05:15
think. Yeah.
01:05:15
>> Did you like did you think he was
01:05:18
capable of taking his own life?
01:05:19
>> I had no idea.
01:05:20
>> No.
01:05:21
>> No idea at all.
01:05:24
>> I knew he had demons, but I didn't know
01:05:26
how dark it is. But I also think the
01:05:28
person he was with at the time did not
01:05:31
help
01:05:32
>> him.
01:05:34
um he wasn't the right she wasn't the
01:05:36
right person for poor at that time.
01:05:39
>> Um personally I think that probably
01:05:41
contributed to why he took you know
01:05:43
>> but I think he also had deep demons that
01:05:46
he needed to
01:05:47
>> Yeah.
01:05:49
>> Yeah. Show me show me a person that that
01:05:51
doesn't have demons or flaws and uh
01:05:53
>> I mean it doesn't it doesn't exist.
01:05:55
>> Yeah.
01:05:55
>> Um Yeah. People are very quick to judge
01:05:58
though, aren't they?
01:06:00
>> Dude, it's shocking.
01:06:01
>> We had to Oh man. And I mean, I've never
01:06:03
spoken about it, but
01:06:08
luckily I've got two mate I've got two
01:06:10
mates, good two mates that will kind of
01:06:12
guided me through that whole [ __ ] with
01:06:15
with media. Um, and basically they said,
01:06:19
"Look, don't add any more fuel to the
01:06:21
fire.
01:06:23
>> Just let it go. It'll be there for a
01:06:25
week and go." But, um, the people that
01:06:27
really pissed me off with the Herald,
01:06:29
New Zealand Herald, really pissed me
01:06:30
off. Um, there was one reporter there.
01:06:32
It was just like just going for it.
01:06:35
>> And I was saying to myself, dude, my bro
01:06:38
took his life. How much what? That's the
01:06:40
worst. That's the ultimate punishment.
01:06:43
>> But they kept on bringing it up and
01:06:44
bringing it up and, you know, and we
01:06:46
just
01:06:48
we kept quiet,
01:06:49
>> you know, we were told just to keep
01:06:51
quiet. They don't add any more fuel to
01:06:52
that fire.
01:06:54
>> So, yeah. I don't have a
01:06:57
nice thing to say about the New Zealand
01:06:58
Herald.
01:06:59
>> Yeah.
01:07:00
So you're never going to be [ __ ] with
01:07:02
them again.
01:07:03
>> No
01:07:04
podcast.
01:07:06
>> Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's the ultimate
01:07:08
price, isn't it?
01:07:09
>> Yeah.
01:07:10
>> That's the thing. That's the That blew
01:07:12
my mind was like this B just took his
01:07:14
life. What else do you want?
01:07:15
>> You still want to [ __ ] Anyway.
01:07:18
>> Yeah. Um Yeah. So the the demons you're
01:07:21
talking about is domestic violence
01:07:22
related, which which isn't isn't pretty,
01:07:24
but you know it. Yeah. And I don't want
01:07:27
to minimize it, but it's like it's not
01:07:29
you're not you're not going to get
01:07:30
capital punishment for it, which is the
01:07:32
the penalty that he paid.
01:07:34
>> Um Yeah. Is it frustrating for you that
01:07:36
you you know you could have helped him
01:07:38
find a way through this? You couldn't
01:07:39
help Yeah. Yeah.
01:07:41
>> I did not know.
01:07:44
>> But if he picked up the phone and told
01:07:46
you, you'd be like, "Bro, this is not
01:07:47
the end of the world. We can we
01:07:48
>> Yeah. Well, the thing is Well, the thing
01:07:50
is with with Pooh, he had people that
01:07:53
could confide on,
01:07:55
>> but even
01:07:57
you know, they didn't know about it
01:07:59
either, you know, and I mean, it's one
01:08:01
of those things you look back and goes,
01:08:02
"Oh [ __ ] that that's a sign right
01:08:04
there. Maybe he was trying to reach out
01:08:05
there." No one knew.
01:08:07
>> Mhm.
01:08:08
>> You know,
01:08:10
>> where's a zoo? Have you got a zoo?
01:08:12
>> I have.
01:08:12
>> Yeah. Is that
01:08:13
>> He travels He's in LA at the moment,
01:08:15
>> so all of us have got one.
01:08:17
>> But he travels with me everywhere I go.
01:08:20
He traveled with me in Hawaii. Uh, but
01:08:24
now that I've got a, you know, my home
01:08:25
is there, he he just stay there when I'm
01:08:28
traveling. He's always with me.
01:08:30
>> Um,
01:08:32
he had a daughter from a previous
01:08:33
relationship. J How's Jasmine now?
01:08:37
>> Sorry, Josie. 13.
01:08:38
>> Oh, Uncle Rob. 13.
01:08:41
>> 14. 14.
01:08:42
>> Yeah. I don't know how old my nieces and
01:08:44
nephews are either, but Yeah. Like, do
01:08:46
is there anything you do to keep her
01:08:47
dad's memory alive? Like, what do you
01:08:50
>> stories you tell about him? No, no,
01:08:52
because um Jazz's mother is phenomenal
01:08:55
and um um Jazz's mother's um uh husband,
01:09:00
they're phenomenal with her
01:09:02
>> and uh she she knows she's I mean she's
01:09:04
old enough to to to figure it out. So
01:09:07
she always um yeah, she has Yeah.
01:09:11
>> Yeah, she knows she knows, you know,
01:09:13
when that time comes around, she does
01:09:15
have memory of of her father. But
01:09:18
>> I've got a a quote from you from your
01:09:20
your Instagram. Um, it's been a year
01:09:22
since my beloved brother Pu took his
01:09:24
life. There is not a single day that I
01:09:26
don't think of him. He's with me. I hold
01:09:28
his ashes. Music sets me off. Songs he
01:09:30
loved. Love songs usually. Um, love
01:09:33
songs usually. And grieving is just part
01:09:35
of our lives now. Poor wasn't perfect,
01:09:37
but he tried. [ __ ] that's emotional.
01:09:39
>> E.
01:09:41
Yeah.
01:09:44
>> Yeah. It's tough.
01:09:47
How how long was it before you could um
01:09:49
like we've talked about him for maybe
01:09:51
five or seven minutes here. How long was
01:09:52
it before you could like talk about him
01:09:55
at all without getting emotional?
01:09:56
>> I've I've always I've always spoken
01:09:58
about him. I mean, there were things
01:10:00
that I didn't want to talk about, but
01:10:02
I've always I've always been open like
01:10:04
that with with his passing. Um
01:10:08
and um
01:10:11
so yeah, and and that was part of my
01:10:12
healing as well was being open.
01:10:14
>> Mhm.
01:10:16
um which has helped me a lot. But yeah,
01:10:19
I've always been open about I mean I
01:10:20
think you know the stuff with the her
01:10:22
that was the first time I've ever seen
01:10:23
anything about that.
01:10:24
>> But I know you know they I mean they
01:10:29
they [ __ ] pissed me off. They really
01:10:31
pissed there's one reporter there. She
01:10:32
really pissed me off.
01:10:35
>> So
01:10:35
>> yeah. Yeah. It's clickbait, isn't it?
01:10:37
>> Oh, [ __ ] you. Oh 100%. That's and and
01:10:41
unfortunately that's the thing. Yeah.
01:10:42
That's what societyy's lives on. Now, um
01:10:46
I do but I always I always the last time
01:10:49
I did speak I had a good chat with him
01:10:51
was when I finished in Hawaii.
01:10:54
I um
01:10:57
before the job actually started, I
01:11:00
actually I was fortunate enough to have
01:11:01
a place right by the beach. Um so the
01:11:04
beach was my backyard and I remember
01:11:06
going in the water and say, "We're here.
01:11:08
This is us. We're here." And when I
01:11:10
finished I went for a swim. It was
01:11:12
[ __ ] pissing down and I went and uh
01:11:15
and I said we did it. We did it. Had a
01:11:17
bit of had a had a cry then packed my
01:11:20
stuff and then back to LA. So the my
01:11:23
journey now and and for a lot of for a
01:11:25
lot of his family and close friends it's
01:11:27
for him. Um yeah because I personally
01:11:32
think if he was around he'd be killing
01:11:35
it in LA. I Pa was phenomenal. who was a
01:11:39
phenomenal performer.
01:11:40
>> In what way?
01:11:42
>> Actor.
01:11:42
>> How was he different to you?
01:11:44
>> Well, one, he could act. Two,
01:11:48
>> he was I think I actually think he was a
01:11:50
little bit better than me. Um, and he
01:11:51
also he just um
01:11:54
he could move. That boy could move. He
01:11:56
was a true performer, you know. He had
01:11:58
everything. He had all the tools. Could
01:12:00
sing, you know, could dance, could act,
01:12:05
>> and he had a range as well. So
01:12:08
>> yeah,
01:12:09
>> the way you're able to talk about him
01:12:10
now, six, seven years on, um it says to
01:12:13
me that it does get easier over time.
01:12:14
>> It does get easier.
01:12:15
>> For anyone that's listening to this
01:12:16
that's in the like the trenches at the
01:12:18
moment, like in the first year or
01:12:19
whatever, um yeah, what what would your
01:12:21
message to them be about grief?
01:12:23
>> About grief, it's do they um from my
01:12:27
personal um for me personally in in
01:12:30
terms of me getting over that? Well, I
01:12:32
did the work as well. I had a I saw
01:12:34
someone about it. I had a regular I had
01:12:37
regular sessions with with that um with
01:12:39
her that helped. Um me I was always open
01:12:42
about it you know I never kind of
01:12:44
suppressed anything and I felt that's
01:12:46
how I help I healed. Um and also cliche
01:12:49
as this may sound just have the people
01:12:51
that have someone around that you can
01:12:53
trust that you can talk to
01:12:55
>> and you don't have to that the the one
01:12:57
thing about grief is people think they
01:12:59
have to say something to make it better.
01:13:01
Now just sit there
01:13:03
>> just sit there and be with that person.
01:13:04
That's that's that's what that's what I
01:13:07
would say and let them you know let them
01:13:08
talk.
01:13:10
>> Are they are they tools that you got
01:13:11
from like observation and learnings or
01:13:13
they got from therapy or what what did
01:13:16
you get from therapy
01:13:17
>> was just being able to talk about
01:13:19
everything? Why you know what could I
01:13:22
have done?
01:13:23
>> Why didn't I see it? All that cuz there
01:13:26
was a lot of blame as well. I wasn't
01:13:28
there for my bro um why didn't he come
01:13:31
to me kind of thing. And then just
01:13:34
dealing with how to live continue life
01:13:36
without without him
01:13:39
>> you know the possibility that you know I
01:13:41
might do that you know all those things.
01:13:45
>> Yeah. You Yeah. I had a friend that took
01:13:48
his own life in quite a violent fashion
01:13:49
and this guy this guy was um life of the
01:13:52
party.
01:13:53
>> Yeah.
01:13:54
>> If there's a 2020 cricket match on he's
01:13:57
the guy that you'd see on TV on the big
01:13:58
screen. He's that guy wearing the two
01:14:00
shirt trying to get the one-handed
01:14:01
catch. And when when the when when he
01:14:04
did this, I thought, [ __ ] if he's
01:14:06
capable of this, then am I?
01:14:08
>> Yeah.
01:14:08
>> But then is that a mask?
01:14:10
>> What what being the life of the C? Cuz
01:14:12
Poo was Yeah.
01:14:13
>> Is that a mask?
01:14:14
>> Yeah.
01:14:14
>> But you you can't pick You don't pick it
01:14:16
up. You don't know. Did you pick it up?
01:14:18
>> Absolutely not.
01:14:19
>> Yeah.
01:14:19
>> No clue.
01:14:22
>> So it does get easier.
01:14:23
>> Does get easier.
01:14:25
>> Does get I mean songs for me, his song,
01:14:27
the his favorite songs still get me.
01:14:29
>> What are they? It's usually Babyface or
01:14:32
anything by Baby Face or Boys to Men by
01:14:34
his songs.
01:14:36
>> Sh. They've got um one song like a Blo
01:14:39
one called um Water Runs Dry.
01:14:41
>> Who's that?
01:14:42
>> Boys to Men.
01:14:43
>> Yeah.
01:14:43
>> Let's not wait till the water runs dry.
01:14:45
Oh my god. Does that set you off?
01:14:47
>> Used to. Not anymore. I smile now.
01:14:50
>> And when I hear the songs like
01:14:52
>> Yeah. Earlier on I used to I used to you
01:14:54
know I used to cry but now I I I smile
01:14:58
at that now. It does get easier, but
01:15:00
you've also got to do the work.
01:15:02
>> Yeah.
01:15:02
>> And it's not one of those thing. I Yeah.
01:15:05
>> Oh, that's encouraging.
01:15:06
>> Yeah.
01:15:07
>> That's inspirational. Do you do you What
01:15:09
do you think happens when you die?
01:15:11
>> Is there an afterlife? Like do you I
01:15:13
suppose what I'm asking is do you ever
01:15:14
do you ever feel his presence?
01:15:16
>> Yeah. How 100%. A lot of us do.
01:15:19
>> I think during TR as well, his presence
01:15:21
was there for everyone. Yeah. Yeah.
01:15:23
Definitely. um for the actors and also
01:15:26
you know we part of the reasons why part
01:15:29
of the motivation for Mickey was for
01:15:31
poor
01:15:31
>> for that film and I don't know whether
01:15:33
you see in the credits in the end there
01:15:35
to our loving brother poor
01:15:36
>> mons
01:15:38
>> so and he was present and and I know uh
01:15:40
the actors were in it as well they felt
01:15:42
him without his presence so he's always
01:15:44
around
01:15:46
>> but in terms of asking your question
01:15:48
what happens when I die
01:15:51
>> I love the whole I'm not a religious
01:15:54
ious person I think probably an atheist
01:15:56
if anything
01:15:57
>> but I what I do believe which I'm
01:16:00
recently believed is you know uh tangor
01:16:05
which is something with most with most
01:16:07
Pacific island like in art there's a
01:16:10
certain point like brianga that's where
01:16:12
the spirits go back into the water in
01:16:14
Hawaii is the same thing tonga samour
01:16:18
that's where I that's that's where I
01:16:20
want to go that's my belief is where I'm
01:16:22
going to go back to
01:16:23
>> you you know, join my ancestors and
01:16:25
stuff.
01:16:27
>> Yeah. You feel poo around though?
01:16:29
>> Yeah.
01:16:30
>> Yeah.
01:16:30
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:16:32
>> Do you talk to him?
01:16:34
>> Used to.
01:16:35
>> Yeah. I don't talk to him as much
01:16:36
anymore. Um
01:16:39
but um
01:16:42
I do I do acknowledge him
01:16:44
>> when when I when when I when when I feel
01:16:47
him feel him around. I suppose any any
01:16:50
family that goes through like a a
01:16:51
shocking grief like this has their their
01:16:53
own way of dealing with them. There's no
01:16:54
right or wrong. But how do how do the
01:16:55
manga do it? Like do you when you have a
01:16:58
family get together is it sort of like
01:16:59
the elephant in the room has
01:17:01
>> No, it's not that. No, it's I think all
01:17:03
my bros kind of had their different ways
01:17:05
of dealing with it. I never questioned
01:17:07
it cuz that's them.
01:17:09
>> But I was always open, you know. So
01:17:13
yeah, everyone did. Um, my my my sister
01:17:16
was probably a little bit similar to me
01:17:18
in terms of being open about it.
01:17:20
>> But my my other bros, you know, they
01:17:22
just dealt with it in their own way, you
01:17:24
know,
01:17:25
>> and I never question that kind of
01:17:27
things. So, okay, that if that works for
01:17:29
you, great.
01:17:30
>> I'm not going to say, "Hey, maybe open
01:17:31
up and do this and that." It's like like
01:17:34
>> I'll let you guys do that. You know,
01:17:37
>> thanks for sharing this stuff.
01:17:39
>> Yeah. Sweet.
01:17:40
>> Is is it easy enough for you to share or
01:17:42
>> It's easier now. It's easier now. But
01:17:49
I still I mean
01:17:52
the shitty thing is it happens more
01:17:54
regularly now.
01:17:55
>> That's a shitty thing. I just don't
01:17:58
think that people are
01:18:02
it's just yeah what I hear is just
01:18:06
simple thing is breaking up.
01:18:08
>> You know people are taking their lives.
01:18:10
And I just don't think people out there
01:18:12
are prepped enough or know or have that
01:18:14
support. I don't know what it is, but I
01:18:16
hear whether that's a media where
01:18:20
social media is more accessible now, but
01:18:22
I hear it a lot and it's it saddens me
01:18:24
now kind of thing.
01:18:26
>> Yeah. Cuz it's a like it's a very
01:18:29
permanent solution to what is always a
01:18:30
temporary problem.
01:18:32
>> Yeah. Yeah. It seems to be the first
01:18:34
thing what I hear seems to be that
01:18:36
that's the first thing. The first thing
01:18:37
I'm going to do is just I'm going to do
01:18:38
that.
01:18:39
>> If I can't deal with what is happening,
01:18:41
I'm going to do that.
01:18:42
>> I I don't want to be here. Boom. Gone.
01:18:44
>> Yeah.
01:18:44
>> And it saddens me that those pe that
01:18:47
they don't have the support or they
01:18:50
haven't, you know, done. I don't know. I
01:18:54
don't It just sadden me. It saddens me.
01:18:56
It saddens me that that's their out.
01:18:57
>> Yeah. It's seen as a viable option.
01:19:00
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:19:00
>> Yeah. It should be off
01:19:01
>> and it's common. It's more common now.
01:19:04
>> How's how's your mental health been? I
01:19:05
know we've talked a bit about therapy.
01:19:07
Good. We talked about your rough patch
01:19:08
and actually maybe the stuff that you
01:19:11
were going with postco and you know
01:19:13
which we talked about at the beginning.
01:19:15
Maybe it was like a whole lot of strands
01:19:16
like a co
01:19:17
>> I think I need brother
01:19:19
>> I think I need I think the university
01:19:22
has weird ways of telling you the change
01:19:25
you but I think I one I needed to go
01:19:28
through that. definitely need to go
01:19:31
through that. And because I I mean I'
01:19:34
I'd hate to think what would happen if I
01:19:36
hadn't gone through it, but it was just
01:19:38
a way of the universe saying, "Hey, you
01:19:40
know, you need to open up your eyes or
01:19:42
what it's actually the problem that
01:19:44
you're the problem with you."
01:19:46
>> Um, but to answer your question, me, I'm
01:19:49
I'm great.
01:19:50
>> I'm in a good place at the moment. You
01:19:53
know, we've got someone that cares for
01:19:54
me and my my kids, you know, love my
01:19:58
kids. M
01:19:59
>> and and they're good, they're healthy.
01:20:01
I've got a, as I spoke before, a
01:20:03
community of people that I'll always I
01:20:06
want to be around,
01:20:07
>> you know?
01:20:08
>> Have you um Yeah, you mentioned you
01:20:09
touch rugby lads um before. Have you
01:20:11
have you always been good at the sort of
01:20:12
vulnerability piece and talking like
01:20:15
openly about crunchy stuff or is this
01:20:17
something that's sort of come recently?
01:20:19
>> I think it's something that came
01:20:20
recently with um I don't know I was
01:20:23
going to be so open about stuff until
01:20:26
and it Yeah.
01:20:29
It was weird because it just came out.
01:20:30
That last podcast that I did, it just
01:20:32
came out and I don't know. It I didn't
01:20:36
think about it. It was just I was just
01:20:37
like, "Yeah, you ask me a question, this
01:20:39
is my answer. I ain't going to hold
01:20:40
anything back."
01:20:42
>> So, I don't know. Possibly.
01:20:44
>> It's um it's a very liberating space to
01:20:46
play in a when you take the guard rails
01:20:48
off and you're not you're not you're not
01:20:50
selfensoring. You're just speaking your
01:20:52
truth.
01:20:52
>> Yeah. Yeah. But I've also got mates, you
01:20:54
know, I've got mates that within that
01:20:56
touch community that I can talk to about
01:20:58
that,
01:20:59
>> you know, that are open to having that
01:21:03
sort of conversation. Um,
01:21:06
and uh same with you, you know, with my
01:21:09
writing mates, you know, um I we can
01:21:11
have those conversation, open
01:21:13
conversation. And I think being around
01:21:15
people that have been open, maybe I'm
01:21:17
just drawn to that. I'm drawn to those
01:21:18
people that are open about what how they
01:21:20
feel.
01:21:21
>> Yeah, I'm the same. You got friends that
01:21:22
you talk, you know, you can talk to and
01:21:24
friends that you just want to get pissed
01:21:25
with.
01:21:25
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.
01:21:26
>> And they're both fine. There's a there's
01:21:28
a space for all of them.
01:21:28
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:21:30
>> Do you like who you are?
01:21:36
>> Do I?
01:21:37
>> You just scrunch your face up.
01:21:39
>> No, because I've had because I
01:21:41
initially, if you would have asked me
01:21:42
that question a few years ago, I said
01:21:43
no.
01:21:44
>> But I'm the anti thinking
01:21:47
>> Yeah. Yeah, I do.
01:21:49
>> Why would you have said no a few years
01:21:51
ago?
01:21:52
You and I have sort of known each other
01:21:53
just just sort of casually like little
01:21:55
conversations here and there for maybe
01:21:56
20 years. You've always been just
01:21:58
charming, funny, nice, charismatic,
01:22:02
>> and a a good man. I'd say a good man,
01:22:04
>> but they were never an [ __ ]
01:22:07
>> Have I been an [ __ ]
01:22:08
>> Never.
01:22:08
>> I can be an [ __ ] I'm a Taurus. I'm
01:22:11
stubborn as [ __ ] man.
01:22:14
>> But everyone can be an [ __ ] Push the
01:22:16
right button.
01:22:16
>> No, I'm I'm But to answer your question,
01:22:18
no, I am. I'm I'm I'm I'm happy with
01:22:20
myself. I'm and and and I like I like
01:22:23
who I am
01:22:24
>> now.
01:22:25
>> Yeah.
01:22:25
>> Yeah.
01:22:26
>> What are you still working on
01:22:28
>> as a man?
01:22:31
>> Nothing.
01:22:34
>> Nothing. Yeah. I don't know.
01:22:36
>> I will tell you if I do, but at the
01:22:38
moment there's nothing. There's nothing
01:22:40
that I need to Maybe there is. I don't
01:22:41
know.
01:22:43
>> Your your definition of success, how's
01:22:45
that changed over the years?
01:22:50
My definition of success would it's hard
01:22:54
to say. It's hard with with what I do.
01:22:58
>> I would think my success would be how I
01:23:02
am as a father.
01:23:06
>> I that would be a success for me.
01:23:10
>> Is how I've brought up my kids and how
01:23:13
they are now as human beings. and
01:23:17
>> that would be a success. I wouldn't say
01:23:18
I'm not I wouldn't say I don't think I'm
01:23:22
at that point on my career where I'm
01:23:23
saying I am successful. I it's still a
01:23:25
work in progress,
01:23:27
>> but in terms of um being a dad and being
01:23:30
the the work that I've done. Um I've
01:23:33
I've s I've succeeded in that. I mean,
01:23:35
there's still things to be done, but
01:23:37
>> yeah, I don't I would successful for me
01:23:40
would be being a good dad.
01:23:41
>> Yeah. So, you you've got two both in
01:23:43
their 20s. They still both talk to you
01:23:45
at the moment?
01:23:46
>> Yeah, they do.
01:23:46
>> Yeah, 100%.
01:23:48
>> My my more more my daughter more than my
01:23:49
son, but my son he rings me. He rings me
01:23:52
now.
01:23:53
>> But
01:23:53
>> what do you mean now?
01:23:54
>> I used I never used to get calls from
01:23:56
him. I used to call him all the time,
01:23:57
but now he's he's amazing. He we have we
01:24:00
actually have really good conversation
01:24:02
like we we would talk for an hour and u
01:24:05
but my daughter Yeah. My daughter always
01:24:07
rings or Yeah.
01:24:09
Um, yeah, I suppose that's the
01:24:12
reflective of the seasons of life,
01:24:13
right? Like there's periods where you
01:24:14
need your but that seems like the
01:24:16
palangi way as well. Yeah. Like you
01:24:18
know, get to 18, 19, fly the coupe,
01:24:20
ignore your for a few years.
01:24:21
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:24:23
>> Doesn't seem like the Samo way.
01:24:24
>> There was a there was a time that my I
01:24:26
love him, but you know, you always used
01:24:28
to my son would just call me. I knew
01:24:30
what he'd be calling for to ask for
01:24:31
money.
01:24:34
>> That was the only time. But now that's
01:24:35
changed. He's like, he just calls me
01:24:37
like, "Oh, M's off to work, Dad."
01:24:39
>> Like, a bit of a catch up.
01:24:42
>> But, um,
01:24:43
>> did did you did they miss out on having
01:24:45
you around much as as little kids
01:24:47
because you were focused on your career
01:24:49
goals?
01:24:50
>> There there's only so many hours in the
01:24:51
day, you know what I mean?
01:24:52
>> Yeah. Cuz I I always remember cuz me and
01:24:56
her me and their mom split up very early
01:24:59
and our main focus was our babies. M.
01:25:02
>> So there was never. So I remember
01:25:04
everything was split down the middle. I
01:25:05
would have my stuff, she would have our
01:25:07
stuff. Um, school uh fe uh school fees
01:25:11
split down the middle. Anything.
01:25:14
And to this day we're we're great mates.
01:25:16
Um um their mom. Um yep. There were
01:25:19
times that I had to I was down in
01:25:22
Wellington for work and that's when
01:25:24
their mom had been um uh really
01:25:27
supportive of if I had to go for work I
01:25:29
would put more a little bit more money
01:25:30
in their account just to balance it out.
01:25:33
But um their mom Alice had been amazing
01:25:36
with with with with my with with when it
01:25:40
comes to my work cuz
01:25:42
>> um Yeah.
01:25:44
>> Yeah. So she's not the one you were
01:25:45
married to I think. Yeah. It's the one
01:25:47
you're married to. That's um You met her
01:25:49
when you were a receptionist at Sachi.
01:25:51
>> Sachi.
01:25:52
>> Yes, I did. Yeah.
01:25:53
>> Hot receptionist.
01:25:57
>> Well, I was a receptionist at Sachi's
01:25:59
down in Wellington. It was two guys
01:26:02
>> and it was me and another guy named
01:26:03
Semi. And it was two, you know, I think
01:26:06
in the advertising world back then, it
01:26:08
was just like these two Polynesian boys.
01:26:10
when they came into their reception like
01:26:11
we were famous down in Wellington for
01:26:13
our reception cuz they would come in, we
01:26:15
would have the music or playing the
01:26:17
guitar, you know, it was never that prof
01:26:19
we were professional, but the clients
01:26:21
used to love and appreciate that cuz you
01:26:23
come in and there's two big SOUR
01:26:30
>> sit down. Yeah, they were really and I
01:26:32
said, oh shame, what's this? Oh,
01:26:34
advertising agency.
01:26:36
So we we we had a reputation of being
01:26:39
yeah amazing down there and we had fun
01:26:40
as well. You know they they let us
01:26:44
you know they let us just be do our
01:26:46
thing and the clients used to love that
01:26:48
you know they come in because and we
01:26:50
would know the clients by by name and
01:26:52
then when I moved to Oakland I
01:26:54
transferred to the Oakland one and I did
01:26:55
the same thing but it wasn't with my
01:26:57
>> with my mate semi
01:27:00
>> but she walked in and that was it.
01:27:02
>> Yeah. So yeah that's the only time
01:27:03
you've been married. Yeah. Um, would you
01:27:05
get married again? What are your
01:27:06
thoughts on that?
01:27:08
>> Probably.
01:27:09
>> Yeah.
01:27:09
>> Yeah.
01:27:10
>> If it was important to the other person.
01:27:12
>> If it was important to the other person.
01:27:13
I'm I'm not bothered either way,
01:27:15
>> but that's the position I'm in.
01:27:17
>> Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
01:27:19
>> It sucks. Say like these things really
01:27:21
take they they take it out of you and
01:27:22
you feel like a failure and Yeah.
01:27:24
There's like guilt, regret, shame, I
01:27:27
guess, all that sort of stuff that goes
01:27:28
along with it.
01:27:28
>> Yeah. Yeah.
01:27:29
>> No, I'd be Yeah, I'd marry again.
01:27:31
>> Mhm.
01:27:32
>> Yeah. Would you?
01:27:34
>> Yeah. If it was Yeah. Yeah.
01:27:36
>> Yeah. Not not for myself. I feel like
01:27:38
I've done that.
01:27:38
>> I've done it, too. Like you. Yeah. I've
01:27:40
done it. I've done it. I had an amazing
01:27:42
time. But yeah.
01:27:43
>> Um, what kind of legacy matters to you
01:27:45
the most as an actor, a father, a man?
01:27:47
Is it something you think about at all?
01:27:49
>> No, not really.
01:27:51
>> No, I don't.
01:27:53
>> They just you puts a lot of pressure on
01:27:55
yourself to to leave a legacy behind. I
01:27:57
I mean, if I was to answer the question
01:27:59
again, it be being a dad,
01:28:01
>> being an amazing dad. the impact you
01:28:02
make on their lives. And [ __ ] the next
01:28:04
I not that I want to accelerate this or
01:28:07
put your kids under any pressure, but I
01:28:08
suppose the grandparent uh piece will be
01:28:10
next.
01:28:11
>> You be a granddad. Um if you if any
01:28:14
grandkids you have happen to listen to
01:28:15
this episode one day. Um yeah, what
01:28:18
would you like them to hear?
01:28:21
>> What would the What would you like them
01:28:22
to take away from their granddad?
01:28:25
Um,
01:28:26
I I I would just just say to my
01:28:28
grandkids that I, you know, I did the
01:28:31
best I can
01:28:32
>> with your parents and um and I think I
01:28:36
did okay.
01:28:37
>> Um,
01:28:39
and just don't be [ __ ]
01:28:45
>> If that was a message from your great to
01:28:47
you, would you have listened to it?
01:28:48
>> Oh, hell yeah.
01:28:49
>> No, you wouldn't.
01:28:50
>> I would.
01:28:51
>> No, you wouldn't.
01:28:51
>> They wouldn't listen.
01:28:54
No, there's that saying that youth is
01:28:56
wasted on the young.
01:28:57
>> Yeah.
01:28:57
>> I think you need to learn the learn the
01:28:59
lessons when your time's right.
01:29:01
>> Yeah.
01:29:02
>> No, just be nice. Just be good people.
01:29:04
Just be good people.
01:29:05
>> What brings you peace these days?
01:29:08
>> My own company.
01:29:10
>> Uh
01:29:11
>> yeah, you create a bit of solitude.
01:29:12
That's why I wonder about the motorbike
01:29:13
thing before.
01:29:14
>> Yeah, it's a little bit of that as well
01:29:16
in with motorbikes. But I don't cuz I
01:29:19
think I've been alone for not alone. Not
01:29:22
not that I choose to be alone, but
01:29:23
because of the the line of work that I
01:29:25
do. I'm always, you know, I'm either
01:29:26
here or somewhere else, and I'm by
01:29:28
myself.
01:29:29
>> I've gotten used to being I'm being I'm
01:29:31
comfortable being with with myself
01:29:34
>> being I I crave that. I crave then um my
01:29:39
time.
01:29:40
>> That's just the dogs.
01:29:41
>> I love it.
01:29:42
>> Yeah. Um yeah, I'm I'm the same. Like
01:29:45
I've got like a
01:29:45
>> It's an age I reckon it's an age thing.
01:29:47
Do you re thing
01:29:48
>> potentially? Yeah. I've got a very small
01:29:50
social battery like and it gets gets
01:29:51
charged up very easily.
01:29:53
>> Yeah.
01:29:54
>> And then I'm fine. Just leave me the
01:29:56
[ __ ] alone.
01:29:56
>> Yeah. Yeah. I'm like that as well.
01:29:58
>> Yeah.
01:29:59
>> When I had my
01:30:00
>> lot a lot of people just can't
01:30:02
>> cannot be in their own thoughts.
01:30:03
>> No.
01:30:04
>> Um
01:30:04
>> and it it Yeah.
01:30:06
>> It blows my mind. I love being Yeah. I I
01:30:09
love my downtime.
01:30:11
>> Are you quite quite emotional these
01:30:13
days? I we we cried earlier like um
01:30:16
talking about your mom and her dementia,
01:30:17
but before that like when was the last
01:30:19
time you
01:30:19
>> I cried I cried everything.
01:30:20
>> Yeah. Have you always been this way?
01:30:22
>> No, I think I've got I've as I've gotten
01:30:24
older I cry. I mean even when I was
01:30:28
walking around the home, you know, I was
01:30:30
crying, you know. Um
01:30:34
you know, Instagram, some Instagram
01:30:36
videos about family. I cry when I see,
01:30:39
you know, those those those those reels
01:30:42
of people surprising their friends or
01:30:44
they haven't seen. I cry at those.
01:30:48
>> That's what I agree. Yeah.
01:30:49
>> Yeah. You know, you're in an emotional
01:30:51
state if a Tik Tok can set you off.
01:30:53
>> Do it's good though. It's a wonderful
01:30:55
emotion that I think I suppressed
01:30:57
through my 20s.
01:30:57
>> I But I embrace it. I don't Yeah. I
01:30:59
don't care. It's just like
01:31:01
>> What are you most afraid of?
01:31:07
I think
01:31:10
what am I most
01:31:17
I don't know Dom
01:31:19
what am I it's not dying
01:31:23
>> definitely be won't be dying cuz yeah
01:31:26
probably getting dementia
01:31:29
>> is that a genetic thing
01:31:30
>> I think so
01:31:33
>> that would freak me out
01:31:35
>> cuz you've seen it firsthand I've seen
01:31:37
it firsthand.
01:31:39
>> But I also I'm I'm the my mindset at the
01:31:42
moment is just to I don't want to go
01:31:45
through that.
01:31:46
>> I want to go
01:31:50
knowing that I had a proper conversation
01:31:52
with with the ones I love.
01:31:53
>> Not not remembering a conversation. I
01:31:56
that's when I want to go.
01:31:57
>> I don't want to be around I don't want
01:31:58
to be a burden to anyone
01:32:01
>> because although my mom's still my mom
01:32:04
but she's not my mom. Do you know what I
01:32:06
mean?
01:32:07
>> Yeah. Not the one that
01:32:08
>> not the woman that that I know.
01:32:12
>> So, I don't know. I'm just trying to
01:32:13
figure it's it's weird cuz I'm trying to
01:32:14
figure that out. How do I leave this
01:32:17
world
01:32:19
at that if I do get if I am diagnosed
01:32:21
with dementia? How do I how do I figure
01:32:23
out when to go cuz I got to convince
01:32:27
someone
01:32:28
>> or like like you like a euthanasia or
01:32:30
No, no.
01:32:31
>> Yeah. I don't want to be I don't I don't
01:32:33
want to be
01:32:34
>> Okay. Okay. No. Okay. But say so you
01:32:36
your your mom said said to you, Robbie,
01:32:38
you know, I've got dementia. It's only
01:32:39
going to get worse. I need you to sign
01:32:41
the paperwork on this. What are you
01:32:42
going to say? You say, "Hell no."
01:32:43
>> No, she doesn't remember. So, it doesn't
01:32:44
matter now.
01:32:48
>> She's gone past that point. Whether I
01:32:50
have control right now, so I'm just in
01:32:52
my mind and my kids will hate me for
01:32:54
this, but
01:32:55
>> I'm seriously thinking on how I can
01:32:58
>> convince someone when you see the signs
01:33:01
where I'm forgetting conversation.
01:33:04
I think about it a lot after being
01:33:06
around when I'm around my I think about
01:33:08
it. I don't want to be here. I want to
01:33:10
remember I want to remember this. That's
01:33:13
my my point in life right now is just
01:33:14
tick boxes. I want to tick boxes and
01:33:16
make sure that someday when I'm sitting
01:33:19
on the deck or something having a word
01:33:21
talking to my grandson or whatever. I
01:33:24
said I've done everything I can.
01:33:26
>> I can go now. I'm happy to go. But if I
01:33:30
have dementia, I I don't want to be
01:33:32
around.
01:33:34
It seems like the Robbie Magaver we've
01:33:37
um met today is in a good space.
01:33:39
>> I am. Yeah,
01:33:39
>> I am in a really good space at the
01:33:41
moment.
01:33:41
>> I got one final question. So the um the
01:33:43
the show sponsored by the Generate Kiwi
01:33:45
Saver scheme and the leaders in Kiwi
01:33:47
Saver performance. I just want to know
01:33:49
who's behind your performance. So you
01:33:51
can put that into your day-to-day life.
01:33:53
So you're the guy on the screen. You're
01:33:55
the guy getting the awards. Uh who's the
01:33:58
the team behind Robbie Mangver's
01:34:01
success?
01:34:03
Well, cliche, but mom and dad.
01:34:06
>> Um, my why is my kids.
01:34:09
>> Um, and
01:34:12
I would probably say my the my community
01:34:15
would be the people, but first and
01:34:17
foremost is mom and dad.
01:34:19
>> And then my why.
01:34:21
>> Are you proud of yourself?
01:34:26
I always have to think about it, Dom,
01:34:27
because in the past, like I said before,
01:34:29
like in the past, I was just like, "No,
01:34:30
I'm not proud of myself, but I am."
01:34:33
>> It's weird though, that conversation
01:34:34
like, you know, you you asking me, "Are
01:34:37
you in a good place?" I've never thought
01:34:39
about it. And thinking about it now, I
01:34:41
am in a good place.
01:34:43
>> Just more work, more acting work and I'd
01:34:45
be perfect.
01:34:48
>> Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, your job's for the
01:34:51
boys.
01:34:52
>> Anyone out there?
01:34:54
I need work.
01:34:56
>> You need
01:34:56
>> fire me.
01:34:57
>> Uh I I had a Tim and recent Tim Timmy
01:35:00
Morrison recently for a podcast and he's
01:35:02
got like Jason Mamoa sort of like taking
01:35:04
him under his under his wing.
01:35:06
>> Yeah. Would you do you want to be
01:35:07
adopted by Jason Mamoa
01:35:09
>> in an acting sense?
01:35:11
>> Oh,
01:35:13
please.
01:35:13
>> Just any please.
01:35:15
>> No. I No. No. I I look I'm on my own
01:35:18
tour. I like being by myself and carving
01:35:20
my own path. But it'd be nice. I
01:35:23
actually met him once. I only met Jason
01:35:25
once, but he was awesome cuz it was at
01:35:28
the rugby. I'll tell the story. It was
01:35:30
at the rugby. He was there. You know how
01:35:33
the All Blacks, you get invited to the
01:35:35
box. He was there and my my took my
01:35:38
daughter and she goes, "Oh my god, it's
01:35:39
Jason. It's Jason." And I now me and
01:35:41
Jason know a guy uh his name is He's a
01:35:43
legend. His name is Brian Kolana, Uncle
01:35:45
Brian back in Hawaii. So that's So I
01:35:47
went up to him and I said, "Bro, I I
01:35:50
know Uncle Brian, blah blah blah." my my
01:35:52
my daughter just wants a photo. Is that
01:35:54
okay? And he goes, "Yes, sweet, bro. But
01:35:55
keep it down rap because I don't want
01:35:57
people coming up to me." So, we took a
01:35:58
little photo with her um my daughter,
01:36:00
him, and me. And he said, "Sweet.
01:36:03
Thanks, brother." Walked off. I thought,
01:36:05
"Sweet."
01:36:05
>> That's so
01:36:06
>> That was the first time I met him.
01:36:07
>> Wow.
01:36:08
>> But it was
01:36:09
>> Did he know who you were?
01:36:12
>> We had Yeah, I could because he I think
01:36:14
cuz Uncle Brian works with him a lot. Um
01:36:17
and he'd been working on the show that I
01:36:19
was on. So he would have probably Yeah.
01:36:22
>> Yeah.
01:36:22
>> Yeah.
01:36:23
>> Hey, this has been a great podcast
01:36:24
today.
01:36:24
>> I hope so, Dom. I always feel paranoid
01:36:26
cuz oh god, what?
01:36:28
>> Yeah. You can't You're like, "This this
01:36:31
is going to be this is going to be the
01:36:32
shortest one ever. I'm nervous. I've got
01:36:34
nothing to say.
01:36:34
>> I got nothing to say."
01:36:36
>> I disagree.
01:36:37
>> Although, yeah, I have to disagree. I
01:36:39
had like you've been like some of the
01:36:41
question that you did say, are you
01:36:42
happy? Like I I was always the my
01:36:45
biggest critic was myself.
01:36:48
But to answer your question, when he
01:36:49
asked me a question, are you happy
01:36:50
yourself? I was like, yeah, I am
01:36:51
actually. Are you proud of yourself?
01:36:53
Yeah, I am.
01:36:55
>> Because I'm in a good space. I'm in a
01:36:56
good space at the moment.
01:36:57
>> Yeah. And what what about your parents?
01:36:59
They proud of you.
01:37:04
>> Yeah.
01:37:06
Yeah. Yeah.
01:37:09
I know they are.
01:37:10
>> What more is there?
01:37:12
>> Yeah.
01:37:12
>> Yeah.
01:37:14
>> Robin Manga, you're a great New
01:37:15
Zealander. Thank you, my bro. Thank you.
01:37:17
It's
01:37:17
>> been awesome.

Podspun Insights

This episode features Robbie Mangarva discussing personal struggles, career challenges, and family dynamics. Key topics include his experiences with grief, mental health, and reflections on his acting career.

Robbie shares the impact of losing his brother, Pua, to suicide, detailing the emotional aftermath and how it has shaped his perspective on life. He recounts the day he received the news and the subsequent feelings of anger and heartbreak.

The conversation also touches on Robbie's career, including his time on the show "Wentworth" and the challenges he faced during and after its conclusion. He reflects on the pressures of the acting industry and the financial struggles that followed.

Robbie discusses his relationship with his parents and how they have influenced his life choices. He expresses gratitude for his community and the support system he has built around him.

Throughout the episode, Robbie emphasizes the importance of vulnerability, self-reflection, and the ongoing journey of healing and personal growth.

Badges

This episode stands out for the following:

  • 95
    Most heartbreaking
  • 90
    Most emotional
  • 90
    Best performance
  • 85
    Most dramatic

Episode Highlights

  • Career Challenges
    Robbie shares his experience of a career slump and the anxiety it brought him.
    “I had to sell my car and some of my bikes just to make ends meet.”
    @ 04m 45s
    March 15, 2026
  • Self-Reflection and Healing
    He discusses the importance of facing uncomfortable truths about oneself during tough times.
    “When I went to that place, I saw stuff about myself that I didn't like.”
    @ 12m 48s
    March 15, 2026
  • A Childhood Memory
    He recalls his first encounter with an escalator, calling it a 'magic staircase.'
    “It's magic staircase.”
    @ 21m 21s
    March 15, 2026
  • A Tribute to Mom
    He shares heartfelt reflections on his mother's struggles with dementia and her enduring strength.
    “She's my superhero.”
    @ 24m 19s
    March 15, 2026
  • The Start of a Career
    He made people laugh in primary school, igniting his passion for acting.
    “Oh, this is cool. What's this all about?”
    @ 36m 16s
    March 15, 2026
  • The Reality of Acting
    He shares the financial struggles and unpredictability of an acting career.
    “When it rains, it pours and when it's good, it's fantastic.”
    @ 44m 26s
    March 15, 2026
  • Fan Encounters
    An unexpected fan moment that left a lasting impression.
    “I had one lady turn up in a wedding dress and said, "I’m here to marry you, Will."”
    @ 57m 50s
    March 15, 2026
  • A Journey Through Grief
    Reflecting on the impact of losing a loved one and the ongoing process of healing.
    “I was supposed to go first.”
    @ 01h 02m 37s
    March 15, 2026
  • The Reality of Grief
    Discussing the long-term effects of losing a brother and how it shapes life.
    “It does get easier.”
    @ 01h 12m 15s
    March 15, 2026
  • Reflections on Suicide
    The speaker expresses sadness over the rising trend of suicide and lack of support.
    “It saddens me that that’s their out.”
    @ 01h 18m 56s
    March 15, 2026
  • A Legacy of Kindness
    The speaker emphasizes the importance of being good people for future generations.
    “Just be good people.”
    @ 01h 29m 05s
    March 15, 2026
  • Finding Pride
    Reflecting on personal achievements, Robbie acknowledges his growth and happiness.
    “I am in a good space at the moment.”
    @ 01h 33m 39s
    March 15, 2026

Episode Quotes

Key Moments

  • Proud of Myself06:26
  • Self-Discovery12:48
  • Long Distance Love17:20
  • Comedy Success54:28
  • Grief and Healing1:10:12
  • Grief Support1:13:01
  • Healing Journey1:15:00
  • Suicide Awareness1:18:56

Words per Minute Over Time

Vibes Breakdown

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