SPOT A PSYCHOPATH IN FIVE SECONDS

The Diary Of A CEO

Ask about The Diary Of A CEO

Episode Description

Around 20% of the population display antisocial behaviour as a consistent part of their personality

That statistic made me think about how good we ACTUALLY are at knowing who we can trust..

Because the people who manipulate us rarely introduce themselves as manipulative. They can be charming, confident, persuasive and for a while, very convincing.

So I wanted to understand what we should actually be looking for.

Leanne ten Brinke is a psychology professor and the founder of the Truth and Trust Lab. She has spent almost two decades studying psychopaths, narcissists and manipulators across prisons, workplaces and politics.

What I found particularly interesting about Leanne’s work is how practical it is. She studies the small patterns in someone’s behaviour that can tell you much more than the confidence or charisma they show you.

We discussed things like:

- The behaviours that can expose a dark personality within seconds. - How some of the most manipulative people can initially appear incredibly charming. - The signs someone may be lying that have nothing to do with eye contact. - Why toxic personalities are often drawn towards positions of power. - What to do when the difficult person in your life is someone you can’t simply walk away from.

One thing that stayed with me from this conversation was how much attention we give to how someone makes us feel when we first meet them.

Confidence can feel like competence. Charm can feel like trustworthiness, but neither necessarily tells you very much about who that person really is.

Leanne explained that what matters far more is consistency and the point is to become better at recognising repeated patterns of behaviour and knowing which ones you shouldn’t ignore.

If you’ve ever had that feeling that something about somebody doesn’t quite add up, but you couldn’t explain why, I think you’ll find this conversation fascinating.

Out now on all platforms ❤️👊🏾

Brief Summary

Ryan discusses spotting psychopaths and dark personality traits in everyday life and research findings on detecting lies.

Key points

  • Spotting Psychopaths. It takes about 5 seconds to spot a psychopath, but they often don't look dangerous.
  • The Truth About Lying. Contrary to popular belief, avoiding eye contact isn't a reliable cue for lying.
  • Dark Personality Traits. Research shows that certain traits like psychopathy and narcissism can be identified through behavior.
  • Dating Profiles and Dark Traits. Can you identify dark personality traits from dating profiles?
  • Curing Dark Traits. A key question arises: can individuals with dark personality traits be cured?

Transcript

How long does it take someone to spot a psychopath? >> About 5 seconds. So, most people think a psychopath looks dangerous. They picture the villain in a movie, but that's not how it works in real life. We've done some research in my lab, and we found there are certainly some things that you can look for. >> Have they ever done that with lying to figure out if people can spot lies? >> Thousands of times. You ask people, "What's the number one cue that someone is lying to you?" They will say they can't look you in the eye, but there's no research to suggest that that is true. >> However, there's an essential tool for

detecting lies, which is >> Oh, [ __ ] >> I know. I study dark personality traits, and I found that there's four different elements, which are psychopathy, Machiavellianism, narcissism, and sadism. And what we found is that people with higher levels of these traits engaged in Duchenne smiles, which is the activation around the eyes. And they also used a lot of hand gestures. >> Where does this come from? >> Well, research suggests that abuse, cold, uncaring parenting style, but also overvaluation of a child early in life may lead to more narcissistic views later. >> Is there any other fascinating questions

you've pursued in your lab? >> Yes. We studied the extent to which psychopathic personality traits could increase the amount of influence you have in government. And also, there are three common mistakes people make when dealing with dark personalities. We'll get into this more later. >> I'm wondering if you can spot any of these dark personality traits just by looking at dating profiles. >> All right. So, this is Ryan. This feels like a red flag. And then there's Haley. That would be associated with psychopathy. Okay. David is a brain surgeon. Very impressive. But I'm seeing narcissism. >> So, I guess this begs the question that

if someone has those traits you've described, can they be cured? >> So, in my lab, what we found is that

Related episodes