HOW TO LEAVE AWKWARD CONVERSATIONS

The worst kind of last impression is a lingering awkwardness. Ugh. This is the worst. >> What are the ways to get out of a bad conversation without offending people? >> Oh my goodness. That's called a graceful exit. We tend to focus a lot on the first impression, but we don't really think about the end, but actually that's what we leave people with. You want to end a conversation and it's time to go. Either we're not feeling it, like we're not we're just not clicking, or like we got to go. Future cue plus compliment or action. So, a future cue is when you ask about or mention something coming in the

future. It's a subtle way to shift the brain into not here, later. Do you have any fun plans coming up this weekend? Do anything fun? >> Uh there's this this wine bar across town that I'm really into, so I'm probably just going to go there, I think, with some friends. >> Oh my gosh, well I I hope it's lovely. I love a Chardonnay. I don't know if you like white wine, be sure to try it. I just asked you about a future and I'm going to wish you well on it, which already gets us into future mode, and then I'm going to end on a compliment or an action. It was so lovely talking to you. I hope you have a great time with that wine bar. I'm going to go get some

more coffee. >> What if they just go straight back in, though? Cuz that's happened to me before where I've tried to >> Okay, this is where the the action and the compliment is really important. So, wrapping up the conversation sounds like it's been so wonderful talking to you. And I'm using an exit voice. Do you hear the exit voice? And our tone really matters here. So, it's been so wonderful talking to you. I I hope that goes great this weekend. So, you're mentioning the action that's going to come later and it's using that closing voice, and then the action. I'm going to go grab more coffee. I'm going to go say hi to the host. Then they cannot. Right? Like

you've ended it then. And you also can use nonverbal cues here. The moment I take a step back, angle my body towards the door, our brain subtly sees, "Ah, they're literally trying to physically disengage." The worst kind of last impression is a lingering awkwardness. There is nothing worse than a "Well, this has been good." It's It's been good for you. It's It's been good for me. Well, um This is the worst. So, be assertive with this. If you want to end it, if you're feeling it's the end, do it. "It's been so great talking to you. I'm going to grab some more coffee. Good luck at the wine bar this weekend. Have so much fun." Be assertive with it, or else it

will linger and that is just kryptonite for charisma.